Tuesday, September 15, 2026

Week 1 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2026 Edition

Quarterback

Biggest Winner: Caleb Williams (Bears)

The Bears offense kicked off the 2026 campaign by absolutely obliterating the Panthers defense in Charlotte and Williams did his fair share to contribute to this highly productive day with the best dual threat outing of his career so far (269 YDS and 2 TD's through the air, 65 YDS and 2 TD's on the ground). Williams and the Bears should be in line for a much tougher test when they face off against Brian Flores' unpredictable Vikings defense on Sunday.

Honorable Mentions: Josh Allen (Bills), Jaxson Dart (Giants), Trevor Lawrence (Jaguars)

Biggest Loser: Bo Nix (Broncos)

While new Broncos OC Davis Webb didn't exactly cover himself in glory during his first game as an NFL playcaller, it would've been hard for any coach to have a good day with this version of Nix playing under center. The 3rd year QB looked completely overwhelmed by Steve Spaguolo's defense and comically out of rhythm with all of his pass-catchers in his first game action since breaking his ankle in the Broncos Divisional Round victory over the Bills in January as the Chiefs absolutely rolled over the defending AFC West champs last night. Nix will look to get back on track against the Jaguars at home in Week 2.

Dishonorable Mentions: Matthew Stafford (Rams), Drake Maye (Patriots), Justin Herbert (Chargers)

Running Back

Biggest Winner: Derrick Henry (Ravens)

Henry kicked off his age 32 season in style by lighting up the Colts defense for 144 YDS and 3 TD's on 24 carries. He also added a 19-YD reception on his sole target of the day. There's absolutely no reason to believe right now that Henry is in line to slow down in 2026 and it's going to be really fascinating to see how much longer he can continue to produce at this absurd clip. 

Honorable Mentions: Kenneth Walker III (Chiefs), D'Andre Swift (Bears), Jahmyr Gibbs (Lions)

Biggest Loser: Quinshon Judkins (Browns)

A suffocating Jaguars defense and horrendous gamescript (the Browns were down 24-0 with 6:18 left in the 2nd quarter) put Judkins in fantasy purgatory to kick off the season as he notched just 50 scrimmage YDS on 14 touches (12 carries, 2 receptions). Judkins will be a shaky FLEX option for the Browns Week 2 showdown with the Buccaneers. 

Dishonorable Mentions: James Cook III (Bills), Saquon Barkley (Eagles), Omarion Hampton (Chargers)

Wide Receiver

Biggest Winner: Christian Watson (Packers)

Prior to the Packers 3rd stunning late game collapse in their last 5 games dating back to last December, Watson was in line to be the #1 topic of discussion among Cheeseheads. The talented but erratic veteran receiver who is now officially the uncontested top pass-catcher in Green Bay was pretty much unstoppable for the first 3 quarters against the Vikings, turning 6 catches into 147 YDS and a pair of TD's. The Packers will be looking to redeem themselves in a big way this week when the Jets come into Lambeau. Watson should be viewed as a borderline WR1/2 option in this potential bloodbath game. 

Honorable Mentions: Justin Jefferson (Vikings), Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions), Chris Olave (Saints)

Biggest Loser: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

It's not every day that the Bengals ride their defense and Mike Gesicki to a victory, but that's precisely what happened against the Buccaneers in Week 1. Chase was barely involved at all catching 2-of-4 targets for 12 YDS-which tied him with Andrei Iosivas for seventh most on the team-on a day where Joe Burrow wasn't overly sharp. Chase could be in line to get the ball funneled to him early and often in Week 2 as the Bengals travel down to Houston to take on a Texans team that got torched through the air by the Bills in the season opener.

Dishonorable Mentions: Jaylen Waddle (Broncos), George Pickens (Cowboys), Terry McLaurin (Commanders)

Tight End

Biggest Winner: Isaiah Likely (Giants)

All of the buzz surrounding Likely emerging as a focal point of the Giants offense came to fruition in Week 1. The free agent pickup from the Ravens was who Jaxson Dart looked to whenever he was in a gotta have it situation on Sunday night against the Cowboys and he delivered on every single occasion-catching all 8 of his targets for 78 YDS and 2 TD's. If Likely can further solidify himself as Dart's most trusted option in the passing game, he should be in line to become one of this year's breakout fantasy stars.

Honorable Mentions: Dallas Goedert (Eagles), Trey McBride (Cardinals), Dalton Kincaid (Bills)

Biggest Loser: Colston Loveland (Bears)

The craziest part about Caleb Williams' big day against the Panthers in Week 1 is that his favorite receiver from the second half of last season wasn't involved at all. That's right, Loveland walked away with a goose egg and only got targeted twice as Kalif Raymond and Luther Burden led the way in receptions/receiving YDS and Cole Kmet and Jahdae Walker found the endzone. It should only be a matter of time before the second-year pro returns to his high-end TE1 form and a Vikings defense that struggled in coverage before their pass rush got cooking in the 4th quarter against the Packers could very well provide him with the redemption him and his fantasy owners are seeking. 

Dishonorable Mentions: George Kittle (49ers), Kyle Pitts (Falcons), Harold Fannin Jr. (Browns)

Defense/Special Teams

Biggest Winner: Steelers

About the only fireworks that came out of the Week 1 clash between the Steelers and Falcons were from the Steelers defense. Fill-in Falcons starter Cooper Rush proved to be his usual woeful self, getting sacked 4 times and throwing 2 picks including a pick 6 to T.J. Watt as the Steelers glided to a 20-13 victory in the first game of the Mike McCarthy-era. The Steelers could find themselves in a feast-or-famine situation in Week 2 depending on what version of Drake Maye shows up at Gillette Stadium on Sunday afternoon.

Honorable Mentions: Jaguars, Seahawks, Lions

Biggest Loser: Texans

Nearly all of the D/ST's that were first off the board in this year's drafts got off to a rough start in 2026, but none were as bad for fantasy purposes than the Texans. DeMeco Ryans' group was horrendous in coverage for most of the game and struggled to generate much pressure on Josh Allen, which lead them to coming out on the wrong end of a 36-31 shootout with just 2 sacks and 0 takeaways. They'll be aiming to return to the top of the D/ST food chain against the Bengals this Sunday. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Chargers, Rams, Broncos

Monday, September 14, 2026

Movie Review: Hope


I'd love to have been on a fly on the wall for the world premiere of Na Hong-jin's Hope at Cannes back in May. The prestigious French film festival doesn't shy away from screening genre films that aren't interested in being intellectually stimulating. In fact, it was just last year that the Australian shark serial killer movie Dangerous Animals debuted there. These films just tend to be screened in the Midnight Screenings sidebar section that has enough proximity from the main attractions to avoid drawing the ire of the people who are only there to watch movies that have higher artistic aspirations. Hope, on the other hand, was competing for the Palme d'or-the festival's top prize which regularly serves as a preview of what films are going to go on to compete for awards around the globe later in the year. An unwieldly action spectacle about the residents (Hwang Jung-min, Zo In-Sung, Ho-yeon, Lee Sang-hee, Im Hyun-sik) of a small South Korean mountainside town near the North Korean border called Hope Harbor banding together to fight a group of mysterious aliens that are already in the process of laying waste to their community when the movie begins being unveiled under these conditions is like somebody showing up to a black-tie event doing Edward 40 Hands. The disgust that came over some attendees upon discovering that a piece of unapologetic low art had somehow snuck into their prestigious party was felt in many of the negative reviews that followed its Cannes premiere, which subsequently helped it go down as one of the most polarizing titles to play at this year's festival. Unsurprisingly, its reception has been a bit better once it broke the containment of the hostile environment it debuted in, but it's still attracted some really harsh criticism from viewers that were expected something more refined from the guy who made The Wailing.  

To me, Hope is a leading example of how much the adrenaline of well-executed action and moments of levity can mask serious flaws within a movie. An ending sequel tease so shameless and silly that it could easily be read as a satirical shot at one of the worst trends in modern American movies and some clunky stretches where director Na does his best impression of telling an alien invasion story where the humans decided to do some half-assed sleuthing as to why these extraterrestrials have launched an attack on Earth before they go back to trying to vanquish them are just simply no match for sprawling chase/shootout sequences where it looks like the people performing the stunts could die at any moment and a scene where a side character describes his encounter with the aliens while battling severe diarrhea in the middle of the woods in great detail. 

The entire movie is kind of like if you took the cast of a South Korean take on a Coen Brothers movie like Fargo or Raising Arizona and inserted them into a Michael Bay-esque action movie where the main characters reveal themselves to be flying debris, explosions that can be seen from outer space and the biggest fucking guns humanity has ever created. If Cannes had a section dedicated to the joys of seeing bullets penetrate surfaces, perfect slow-motion usage and borderline unkillable aliens that run like cheetahs and have the strength of King Kong, Hope would've won in a landslide. This movie is catnip for anyone who starts shaking with excitement upon hearing that an action movie is chaotic, dumb and messy and I have no qualms with just how hard I ate up the big buffet of dumb maximalist madness that this madman Na hong-Jin put into the world. Thank you director Na for being such an ally to our community and it would be incredible if you were kind enough to feed all of us charlatans another delightful meal someday. 

Grade: B+

Thursday, September 10, 2026

Nicole Kidman Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Nicole Kidman-whose latest project "Practical Magic 2" releases in theaters today. 

Nicole Kidman's Filmography Ranked:

25.Lion (D)

24.The Others (D+)

23.Practical Magic (D+)

22.The Beguiled (C-)

21.Secret in their Eyes (C)

20.The Paperboy (C)

19.A Family Affair (C)

18.Batman Forever (C+)

17.Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (B-)

16.Stoker (B-)

15.Dead Calm (B-)

14.Days of Thunder (B-)

13.Eyes Wide Shut (B-)

12.Just Go with It (B) 

11.Destroyer (B)

10.Bombshell (B)

9.Babygirl (B)

8.The Upside (B)

7.Being the Ricardos (B)

6.Paddington (B)

5.Aquaman (B+)

4.Rabbit Hole (B+)

3.The Northman (B+)

2.To Die For (B+)

1.The Killing of a Sacred Deer (B+)

Top Dog: The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017)

Even by the standards of notorious sicko Yorgos Lanthimos, The Killing of a Sacred Deer is going to be a tough sell for a lot of people. This is a BLEAK movie that goes to some dark places early on and only ventures further down a rabbit hole of despair and hopelessness as it progresses. This dedication to uncompromising darkness alongside the terrific performances from Colin Farrell, Kidman and Barry Keoghan are the main reasons why this deeply unnerving movie is very high on my list of favorite Lanthimos joints. 

Bottom Feeder: Lion (2016)

While I can't speak to how true to reality its fact-based story of an Indian man (Dev Patel) who mostly grew up in Australia returning to India with the hopes of finding the family he was accidently separated from when he was 5, Lion plays out in such a shamelessly melodramatic matter that I didn't buy an ounce of the wannabe feel good bullshit it was putting down. Disingenuous, faux sentimental bullshit like will never not piss me off and part of me is glad that the love Lion received during the 2016 awards season has largely dissipated with time. 

Most Underrated: Rabbit Hole (2010)

Rabbit Hole is a moving, raw and honest portrayal of grief and guilt that has really managed to fly completely under-the-radar since it was released 16 years ago. Kidman and Aaron Eckhart are stellar as a married couple that's struggling to maintain their relationship as they try to process the death of their 4-year-old son in a tragic accident and the really smart script from David Lindsay-Abair does a terrific job of delivering a sensitive, emotionally intelligent exploration of how this unfathomable loss is driving a wedge between them that may never be able to be repaired.

Most Overrated: The Others (2001)

The Others was one of those movies that I was too young to see when it came out but was old enough to process just how much buzz there was surrounding it at the time. By the time I finally got around to watching it in the spring of 2022, I was kind of taken aback by how I didn't like it. Outside of its gorgeous gothic haunted house aesthetics, nothing about this movie impressed me in the slightest. The pacing is brutal, the performances are merely alright, and the really silly twist ending manages to further unravel an already pretty weak story. 

Wednesday, September 9, 2026

2026 NFL Prediction-Palooza: Division Standings, Playoffs, Super Bowl, MVP and More

Today is NFL Groundhog Day as a rematch of the last consequential game that was held (Super Bowl LX: Seattle Seahawks vs. New England Patriots) is set to kick off the 2026 regular season. In honor of this wonderful occasion, I've put together a long list of predictions for the upcoming season that includes MVP, Super Bowl and for the first time ever as I elected to retire the NFL Preview Series this year, division standings. Hope you enjoy this collection of nonsense and the game tonight.

Division Standings:

AFC East:

1.Buffalo Bills (10-7)

2.New England Patriots (10-7)

3.New York Jets (4-13)

4.Miami Dolphins (2-15)

AFC North:

1.Baltimore Ravens (12-5)

2.Cincinnati Bengals (10-7)

3.Pittsburgh Steelers (8-9)

4.Cleveland Browns (3-14)

AFC South:

1.Houston Texans (11-6)

2.Jacksonville Jaguars (10-7)

3.Indianapolis Colts (7-10)

4.Tennesssee Titans (5-12)

AFC West:

1.Denver Broncos (12-5)

2.Los Angeles Chargers (9-8)

3.Kansas City Chiefs (7-10)

4.Las Vegas Raiders (4-13)


NFC East:

1.Philadelphia Eagles (11-6)

2.New York Giants (9-8)

3.Dallas Cowboys (7-10)

4.Washington Commanders (5-12)

NFC North:

1.Minnesota Vikings (12-5)

2.Green Bay Packers (11-6)

3.Chicago Bears (9-8)

4.Detroit Lions (6-11)

NFC South:

1.Tampa Bay Buccaneers (11-6)

2.Carolina Panthers (8-9)

3.New Orleans Saints (6-11)

4.Atlanta Falcons (5-12)

NFC West:

1.Los Angeles Rams (14-3)

2.Seattle Seahawks (11-6)

3.San Francisco 49ers (8-9)

4.Arizona Cardinals (3-14)

Playoffs:

AFC:

1.Broncos

2.Ravens

3.Texans

4.Bills

5.Patriots

6.Bengals

7.Jaguars

Wild Card:

Ravens over Jaguars

Bengals over Texans

Bills over Patriots

Divisional Round:

Broncos over Bengals

Ravens over Bills

Conference Championship:

Ravens over Broncos

NFC:

1.Rams

2.Vikings 

3.Eagles

4.Buccaneers 

5.Seahawks

6.Packers

7.Giants

Wild Card:

Vikings over Giants

Packers over Eagles

Seahawks over Buccaneers

Divisional Round:

Rams over Packers

Seahawks over Vikings

Conference Championship:

Rams over Seahawks

Super Bowl:

Rams over Ravens

Year-End Awards:

MVP: Joe Burrow (Bengals)

Offensive Player of the Year: Justin Jefferson (Vikings)

Defensive Player of the Year: Myles Garrett (Rams)

Offensive Rookie of the Year: Carnell Tate (Titans)

Defensive Rookie of the Year: Reuben Bain Jr. (Buccaneers) 

Comeback Player of the Year: Kyler Murray (Vikings)

Coach of the Year: Jesse Minter (Ravens)

League Leaders:

Passing YDS: Joe Burrow (Bengals)

Passing TD's: Joe Burrow (Bengals)

Rushing YDS: Bijan Robinson (Falcons)

Rushing TD's: Jonathan Taylor (Colts)

Receiving YDS: Justin Jefferson (Vikings)

Receiving TD's: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

Receptions: Brock Bowers (Raiders)

Sacks: Myles Garrett (Rams)

Interceptions: Derek Stingley Jr. (Texans)

Forced Fumbles: Aidan Hutchinson (Lions)

Tackles: Edgerrin Cooper (Packers)

Miscellaneous Awards:

AFC Team Most Likely to Surprise: Bengals

AFC Team Most Likely to Disappoint: Patriots

NFC Team Most Likely to Surprise: Giants

NFC Team Most Likely to Disappoint: Bears

Head Coach Most Likely to Be Fired During the Season: Aaron Glenn (Jets)

Tuesday, September 8, 2026

2026 NFL Power Rankings: Week 1

1.Seattle Seahawks Week 1 opponent: New England Patriots

2.Los Angeles Rams Week 1 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

3.New England Patriots Week 1 opponent: Seattle Seahawks 

4.Denver Broncos Week 1 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

5.Houston Texans Week 1 opponent: Buffalo Bills

6.Chicago Bears Week 1 opponent: Carolina Panthers

7.San Francisco 49ers Week 1 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

8.Philadelphia Eagles Week 1 opponent: Washington Commanders

9.Buffalo Bills Week 1 opponent: Houston Texans

10.Green Bay Packers Week 1 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

11.Jacksonville Jaguars Week 1 opponent: Cleveland Browns

12.Los Angeles Chargers Week 1 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

13.Baltimore Ravens Week 1 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

14.Minnesota Vikings Week 1 opponent: Green Bay Packers

15.Detroit Lions Week 1 opponent: New Orleans Saints

16.Pittsburgh Steelers Week 1 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

17.Dallas Cowboys Week 1 opponent: New York Giants

18.Kansas City Chiefs Week 1 opponent: Denver Broncos

19.Carolina Panthers Week 1 opponent: Chicago Bears

20.Tampa Bay Buccaneers Week 1 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

21.Cincinnati Bengals Week 1 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

22.Indianapolis Colts Week 1 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

23.New Orleans Saints Week 1 opponent: Detroit Lions

24.Washington Commanders Week 1 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

25.New York Giants Week 1 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

26.Atlanta Falcons Week 1 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

27.Tennesee Titans Week 1 opponent: New York Jets

28.New York Jets Week 1 opponent: Tennessee Titans

29.Arizona Cardinals Week 1 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

30.Las Vegas Raiders Week 1 opponent: Miami Dolphins

31.Cleveland Browns Week 1 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars

32.Miami Dolphins Week 1 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

Monday, September 7, 2026

Movie Review: Onslaught

 

Adam Wingard brushed off the failures of Death Note and Blair Witch in a very unique way by making a pair of successful, pretty well-liked blockbusters in Godzilla vs. Kong and Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire. With his artistic image rehabilitated and producers eager to work with him after making Warner Brothers a boatload of cash, Wingard had the freedom to do whatever the hell he wanted when he elected to not come back for the upcoming Godzilla x Kong: Supernova. Instead of going bigger, Wingard decided to return to his down-and-dirty genre movie roots for the first time since 2014's The Guest with original action horror vehicle Onslaught. While it's not as high on giddy energy or sleazy thrills as You're Next or The Guest, it's still a welcome return to the style of filmmaking that put Wingard on the map. 

For those of you out there that have seen Wingard's early work, Onslaught is speaking a language you're fluent in. His fascination with the evils of the military industrial complex and love of 80's B-movies are the driving forces behind this tale of a PTSD-afflicted Army veteran (Adria Arjona) rotting away in an isolated trailer New Mexico trailer park who has to rely on her old skill set when a trio of genetically enhanced super soldiers (Alex Pereira, Dave Campbell, Tyler Hall) created by a former Nazi scientist (Dan Stevens) designed to wage war on the American populace escape from a secret government facility after a test run for their private contractor buyer (Michael Biehn) goes awry. Wingard is completely at ease returning to operating in his old sleazy register as he concocts an efficient, stylish pseudo-slasher flick that feels like it was ripped from the bottom shelf of a video store circa 1986. Some viewers will take issue with how thin Onslaught's story/social commentary is, and I can't argue with them on that point as it's mostly just there to provide an excuse to unleash these glowing-eyed killing machines onto an unsuspecting population. However, there is so much cool shit going on (Gigantic blood squibs! Insane chainsaw kills! Oren Soffer becoming the latest cinematographer to prove that night scenes on digital cameras can look sick if they're lit properly!) and magnetic actors (Arjona, Stevens, Rebecca Hall, Reginald VelJohnson, Eric Warehiem and MVP Drew Starkey with a mesmerizing freak turn that has finally sold me on his status as one of the industry's rising stars) having fun throwing themselves into this weird little fucked up world that I didn't really care that Wingard was more interested in reveling in his long overdue return to his beloved grindhouse aesthetics than examining the contempt the United States government has for its own people and the role that the military plays in carrying out this violent disdain. Onslaught is a flavor of genre picture that doesn't really exist anymore and when somebody like Wingard is responsible for bringing one into the world it's a legitimate cause for celebration among the small group of sickos who care about this sort of thing. Welcome home to Sleazeville Mr. Wingard, hopefully you can stay a while before you get called back up to the higher class digs of Blockbuster City.

Grade: B

Sunday, September 6, 2026

RIP Andy Williams

I was shocked and saddened to hear that musician and professional wrestler Andy Williams died early this morning after collapsing following a match last night in Millvale, Pennsylvania. He was 48. Williams was best known as one of the founding guitarists of Buffalo metalcore outfit Every Time I Die, a role that he remained in until they disbanded in 2022. Williams elected not to join the rest of the instrumental section from ETID's final lineup (lead guitarist/fellow founding ETID member Jordan Buckley, bassist Stephen Micciche, drummer Clayton "Goose" Holyoak) in their new band Better Lovers to focus on his wrestling career with AEW, but he was part of a newly founded post-hardcore/sludge metal band called Atomic Rule that released a pair of EP's last year. 

As I'm not a wrestling fan, Williams' work in ETID is what I'll primarily remember him by. Him and Buckley were such a formidable guitar tandem that always knew when to punch people in the face with their riffs or give them a chance to breathe before picking the tempo back up again. On top of his top-notch guitar playing, he was a colorful personality that fully embodied the goofy energy that ETID often carried themselves with. ETID would've never become the beacon of consistent greatness that made them one of the most influential bands in the history of metalcore without Williams and his electrifying presence. He'll be sorely missed and my thoughts go out to his family and friends.