2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 20 Punters

()=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021

20.(12) Mitch Wishnowsky (49ers)

19.(11) Sam Martin (Broncos)

18.(1) Johnny Hekker (Panthers)

17.(8) Brett Kern (Titans)

16.(18) Pat O'Donnell (Packers)

15.(10) Kevin Huber (Bengals)

14.(6) Corey Bojorquez (Browns)

13.(14) Jordan Berry (Vikings)

12.(+) Tommy Townsend (Chiefs)

11.(15) Cameron Johnston (Texans)

10.(+) Thomas Morstead (Dolphins)

9.(+) Blake Gillikin (Saints)

8.(5) Michael Dickson (Seahawks)

7.(7) Logan Cooke (Jaguars)

6.(3) Jake Bailey (Patriots)

5.(19) Andy Lee (Cardinals)

4.(+) A.J. Cole (Raiders)

3.(13) Bryan Anger (Cowboys)

2.(4) Jack Fox (Lions)

1.(2) Tress Way (Commanders)

2022 NBA Free Agency: 10 Best Players Available

If there are any substantial fireworks to be had once the new NBA league year officially launches Friday at Midnight EST, they are not likely to come from the free agency pool. With Zach Lavine being the only established star of note, Jalen Brunson believed to be the most coveted prize on the UFA market (Lavine is a near lock to return to the Bulls) and DeAndre Ayton being the only splashy young player on the RFA market that seems to have a legitimate chance of leaving their current, the 2022 class is easily the least exciting in recent memory. Still, contending teams and desperate tweeners will be looking to add veteran role players and/or hoping that one of the higher-upside RFA's (Miles Bridges, Ayton, Anfernee Simons, Collin Sexton) can be signed away from the team that drafted them. Here are the 10 players from this class that I believe to be the best.

(Note: Since they're expecting to either exercise their player option or re-sign with their current teams, James Harden, Bradley Beal and Bobby Portis were excluded from this list.)

10.Collin Sexton, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Cleveland Cavaliers)

Even with the damning combination of a checkered history of playing hero ball/pissing off teammates with his selfish behavior and the Cavs going onto play better team basketball after he suffered a season-ending meniscus tear last November sitting on his resume, Sexton is a 23-year-old who can be relied onto score 20-25 every night and that skill set alone will be enough for plenty of offer sheets to make their way to him. 

Possible Destinations: Indiana Pacers, Cleveland Cavaliers, San Antonio Spurs, New York Knicks, Detroit Pistons, Dallas Mavericks, Sacramento Kings

9.Malik Monk, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Los Angeles Lakers):

About the only thing that went right for the Lakers last season was the signing of Malik Monk. Bouncing between the bench and starting lineup all season long, Monk-who signed for the vet minimum after a so-so start to his career with the Hornets-showed steady improvement as an overall shooter (a career-high 47.3%-up just under 4% from 2019-20/2020-21), shot 3's at an excellent clip for a 2nd straight season (39.1%, down exactly 1% from 2020-21) and averaged roughly 14 points per game on a team that largely consisted of ball-dominant players. If Monk enters the right situation where his scoring ability can be properly utilized, he could be a very productive 6th/7th man.

Possible Destinations: Phoenix Suns, Los Angeles Lakers, Brooklyn Nets, Milwaukee Bucks, Toronto Raptors, Boston Celtics, Chicago Bulls, Portland Trail Blazers   

8.P.J. Tucker, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Miami Heat):

At the ripe age of 37, Tucker continues to be one of the toughest, most consistent perimeter defenders in the league and as long as he can stay on the floor and make life difficult for star wings for 22-30 minutes a game, he'll have a strong market among contending teams.

Possible Destinations: Miami Heat, Philadelphia 76ers, Golden State Warriors, Boston Celtics, Brooklyn Nets, Milwaukee Bucks

7.Jusuf Nurkic, center (2021-22 team: Portland Trail Blazers)

Injuries continue to be a big concern for Nurkic and his erratic availability could end up costing him money on what is likely to be the final semi-big payday of his NBA career. That being said, he's a consistent double double producer when healthy and his floor-stretching potential gives his game an extra layer that separates him from the other traditional centers on the market outside of Ayton 

Possible Destinations: Portland Trail Blazers, Phoenix Suns, Indiana Pacers, Atlanta Hawks, Detroit Pistons

6.Bruce Brown, small forward (2021-22 team: Brooklyn Nets)

Last season was an impressive showcase for Brown's growth as a 3 and D player and the heart and hustle he showed during the Nets rough playoff series against the Celtics was a refreshing sight to see on a team that didn't have a whole lot of that outside of their leader Kevin Durant. Every single contending team would benefit from having a guy like Brown on their roster and at 25 going on 26, he should only continue to get better in his role.

Possible Destinations: Brooklyn Nets, Philadelphia 76ers, Milwaukee Bucks, Toronto Raptors, Boston Celtics, Los Angeles Lakers, Washington Wizards, Miami Heat 

5.Anfernee Simons, point/shooting guard (2021-22 team: Portland Trail Blazers):

Simons absolutely exploded in a Damian Lillard-less Blazers backcourt, especially after C.J. McCollum was traded to the Pelicans, finishing the season with 17.3 PPG on 44.3% shooting from the field and 40.5% from deep. Those numbers will obviously dip a bit with Lillard back in the lineup, but Simons' shooting touch and range should make him a worthy heir to McCollum's role as the Blazers highly productive 2 guard.

Possible Destinations: Portland Trail Blazers, Sacramento Kings. San Antonio Spurs 

4.Jalen Brunson, point/shooting guard (2021-22 team: Dallas Mavericks):

Getting the opportunity to earn major minutes alongside Luka Doncic in the Mavs backcourt turned Brunson into a solid #2 scorer (a career-best 16.3 points per game) during their improbable run to the Western Conference Finals this season. Whether Brunson can keep that up elsewhere remains to be seen, but I'd be willing to bet that his odds of doing so will be at least twice as low if he ends up following his expected path and signs with the soul-sucking Knicks. He's yet to prove that he's a legitimate facilitator in the pros and some combo of Julius Randle, Evan Fournier, R.J. Barrett, Obi Toppin, Derrick Rose, Cam Reddish and Immanuel Quickley isn't going to help him get the wide array of open looks that helped him thrive in Dallas. The money might be real nice Jalen, but you'd be wise to go pretty much anywhere else besides the Knicks.     

Possible Destinations: New York Knicks, Dallas Mavericks

3.DeAndre Ayton, center (2021-22 team: Phoenix Suns):

Ayton going from being a perceived long-term franchise cornerstone in Phoenix to being benched by Monty Willliams in Game 7 of the Western Conference Semifinals against the Mavericks in just a year's time has been pretty shocking to witness. While his departure from Phoenix isn't guaranteed at this point, it's hard to believe the coaching staff and front office is going to want him back after he dogged it so hard in a playoff series that the Suns had absolutely no business losing. Despite his questionable effort at times, the 23-year old has still produced at a high enough level and has enough upside to secure a contract that's at least in the ballpark of the max deal he was seeking last offseason.

Possible Destinations: Atlanta Hawks, Detroit Pistons, Phoenix Suns, Indiana Pacers, San Antonio Spurs, Toronto Raptors  

2.Miles Bridges, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Charlotte Hornets):

Whatever fire got lit under the ass of Bridges last season is going to yield him one of the more active markets for a restricted free agent in recent memory and a big payday when he signs his name on the dotted line. While there's some justifiable apprehension to be had when a team is considering paying a guy who wasn't overly great prior to last season, Bridges' explosive athleticism, efficient scoring from all over the floor and terrific rebounding ability for a 6'7 wing (7.0 per game last season as a starter and 6.0 per game in 2020-21 as a bench player) makes him more likely to be a long-term high-level performer than a bag-chasing, contract-year wonder.   

Possible Destinations: Charlotte Hornets, Indiana Pacers, Detroit Pistons, Memphis Grizzlies, Sacramento Kings, Utah Jazz  

1.Zach Lavine, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Chicago Bulls):

Lavine is a dynamic scorer whose improved efficiency and passing has turned him into a legit star over the past couple seasons. Considering how well the Bulls were playing before Lonzo Ball and LaVine got hurt in the second half of the season, they would be silly to not re-sign him to the max deal he'll command as the consensus top player in this free agency class and see what they're capable of achieving when healthy.

Possible Destinations: Chicago Bulls, Dallas Mavericks, New York Knicks

Other Notable Free Agents:

Aaron Holiday, point guard (2021-22 teams: Washington Wizards/Phoenix Suns)

Andre Drummond, center (2021-22 team: Brooklyn Nets)

Austin Rivers, point/shooting guard (2021-22 team: Denver Nuggets)

Bismack Biyombo, center (2021-22 team: Phoenix Suns)

Blake Griffin, power forward (2021-22 team: Brooklyn Nets)

Bryn Forbes, shooting guard (2021-22 teams: San Antonio Spurs/Denver Nuggets)

Caleb Martin, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Miami Heat)

Chris Boucher, power forward (2021-22 team: Toronto Raptors)

Cody Martin, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Charlotte Hornets)

Danuel House Jr., shooting guard (2021-22 team: Houston Rockets)

Delon Wright, point/shooting guard (2021-22 team: Atlanta Hawks)

Dennis Schroder, point/shooting guard (2021-22 teams: Boston Celtics/Houston Rockets)

Dewayne Dedmon, center (2021-22 team: Miami Heat)

Donte DiVincenzo, shooting guard (2021-22 teams: Milwaukee Bucks/Sacramento Kings)

Dwight Howard, center (2021-22 team: Los Angeles Lakers)

Gary Harris, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Orlando Magic)

Gary Payton II, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Golden State Warriors)

Goran Dragic, point/shooting guard (2021-22 teams: Toronto Raptors/Brooklyn Nets)

Gorgui Dieng, center (2021-22 team: Atlanta Hawks)

Isaiah Hartenstein, center (2021-22 team: Los Angeles Clippers)

JaVale McGee, center (2021-22 team: Phoenix Suns)

Jevon Carter, shooting guard (2021-22 teams: Brooklyn Nets/Milwaukee Bucks)

Joe Ingles, small forward (2021-22 teams: Utah Jazz/Portland Trail Blazers)

Juan Tuscano-Anderson, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Golden State Warriors)

Kent Bazemore, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Los Angeles Lakers)

Kevon Looney, center (2021-22 team: Golden State Warriors)

Kyle Anderson, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Memphis Grizzlies)

LaMarcus Alridge, power forward (2021-22 team: Brooklyn Nets)

Lonnie Walker IV, shooting guard (2021-22 team: San Antonio Spurs)

Marvin Bagley Jr., power forward (2021-22 teams: Sacramento Kings/Detroit Pistons)

Mitchell Robinson, center (2021-22 team: New York Knicks)

Mo Bamba, center (2021-22 team: Orlando Magic)

Montrezl Harrell, power forward/center (2021-22 teams: Washington Wizards/Charlotte Hornets)

Nemanja Bjelica, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Golden State Warriors)

Nicolas Batum, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Los Angeles Clippers)

Nicolas Claxton, center (2021-22 team: Brooklyn Nets)

Otto Porter Jr., small forward (2021-22 team: Golden State Warriors)

Patty Mills, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Brooklyn Nets)

Ricky Rubio, point guard (2021-22 teams: Cleveland Cavaliers/Indiana Pacers)

Serge Ibaka, power forward/center (2021-22 teams: Los Angeles Clippers/Milwaukee Bucks)

T.J. Warren, small/power forward (2021-22 team: Indiana Pacers)

Thaddeus Young, power forward (2021-22 teams: San Antonio Spurs/Toronto Raptors)

Tristan Thompson, power forward (2021-22 teams: Sacramento Kings/Chicago Bulls)

Tyus Jones, point guard (2021-22 team: Memphis Grizzlies)

Victor Oladipo, shooting guard/small forward (2021-22 team: Miami Heat)

Wesley Matthews, shooting guard (2021-22 team: Milwaukee Bucks)

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 20 Kickers

()=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021 

20.(+) Matt Prater (Cardinals)

19.(+) Greg Joseph (Vikings)

18.(12) Cairo Santos (Bears)

17.(+) Zane Gonzalez (Panthers)

16.(15) Ryan Succop (Buccaneers)

15.(+) Jake Elliott (Eagles)

14.(10) Graham Gano (Giants)

13.(20) Joey Slye (Commanders)

12.(9) Greg Zuerlein (Jets)

11.(19) Dustin Hopkins (Chargers)

10.(14) Nick Folk (Patriots)

9.(+) Evan McPherson (Bengals)

8.(16) Robbie Gould (49ers)

7.(18) Tyler Bass (Bills)

6.(4) Younghoe Koo (Falcons)

5.(+) Matt Gay (Rams)

4.(13) Daniel Carlson (Raiders)

3.(6) Chris Boswell (Steelers)

2.(2) Harrison Butker (Chiefs)

1.(1) Justin Tucker (Ravens)

Steve Carell Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Steve Carell, whose latest project "Minions: The Rise of Gru" opens in theaters on Thursday. 

Steve Carell's Filmography Ranked:

24.The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (D+)

23.Evan Almighty (C)

22.Despicable Me (C)

21.Welcome to Marwen (C)

20.Wake Up, Ron Burgundy (C+)

19.Irresistible (B-)

18.Dan in Real Life (B-)

17.Dinner for Schmucks (B)

16.Cafe Society (B)

15.Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (B)

14.Date Night (B)

13.Bruce Almighty (B)

12.Battle of the Sexes (B)

11.Foxcatcher (B)

10.The Way, Way Back (B)

9.Last Flag Flying (B)

8.Get Smart (B+)

7.Little Miss Sunshine (B+)

6.Crazy, Stupid, Love (B+)

5.Vice (A-)

4.Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (A-)

3.The Big Short (A-)

2.Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (A+)

1.The 40-Year-Old Virgin (A+)

Top Dog: The 40-Year-Old Virgin (2005)

Top form Judd Apatow is such a powerful cinematic force. Backed by an extraordinary cast (Carell, Catherine Keener, Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen, Romany Malco, Jane Lynch, Elizabeth Banks, Leslie Mann) who was largely unknown or underappreciated prior to this project, Apatow made a hilarious juvenile sex comedy that slowly and organically blossoms into a really heartfelt adult love story. This transition would be unthinkable for most filmmakers, but Apatow's unmatched understanding of grown men acting like childish fucking idiots and mature, loving romantic relationships make this daunting, unexpected transition look downright effortless.   

Bottom Feeder: The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (2013)

It's always disheartening to see talent go to waste on screen and the now long forgotten The Incredible Burt Wonderstone tossed an impressive collection of luxury items into the dumpster without a care in the world. Carell, Steve Buscemi, Jim Carrey, Olivia Wilde, James Gandolfini and Alan Arkin all helplessly flounder around in this nearly completely laugh-free dud that struggles to mine quality jokes out of the inherently ridiculous world of Las Vegas magicians.   

Most Underrated: Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013)

Is Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues on the level of the original? No and personally, I think expecting it to be is unfair. As far as I'm concerned, Anchorman is a singular work of comic genius that couldn't be replicated under any circumstance. However, what Anchorman 2 does do is deliver the best follow-up possible. The returning cast (Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Paul Rudd, Carell, David Koecher, Fred Willard) slips back into their roles seamlessly and the new additions (Kristen Wiig, James Marsden, Megan Good) easily carve out their spots in the ensemble, the absurd humor is delivered with panache and energy and the volume of great scenes/quotable lines sprinkled throughout this long-awaited reunion affair is high enough to ensure that there's still plenty of big laughs to be had.      

Most Overrated: Despicable Me (2010)

A single Despicable Me/Minions movie was more than enough for me. While it's relatively inoffensive on the whole, there wasn't a strong enough comical or emotional hook present for me to feel compelled to spend any additional time with Gru, the Minions and the rest of the gang. 

Comedy That I Remember Very Fondly, but Have No Idea How Well It Holds Up: Get Smart (2008)

Get Smart was a movie that I had lot fun with when I saw it in theaters back in the summer of 2008. I even excitedly purchased a DVD copy of it for stupid cheap ($2-3) at a Newbury Comics a few years later. Like most films that I saw as a teenager/young adult, but haven't rewatched since, I'm not overly confident that I'd be as high on Get Smart if i watched it today. Comedy has a tendency to age worse than any other genre and it's not exactly being championed or even brought up much currently (its current IMDB score is 6.5 and the reviews it received during its initial release were mixed). Maybe I'll have to break out that DVD in the near future and get some clarity on this Get Smart take.

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 50 Safeties

=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021 

50.(+) Mike Edwards (Buccaneers)

49.(44) Jaquiski Tartt (Eagles)

48.(32) DeShon Elliott (Lions)

47.(15) Kareem Jackson (Broncos)

46.(41) Terrell Edmunds (Steelers)

45.(+) Taylor Rapp (Rams)

44.(+) Trevon Moehrig (Raiders)

43.(+) Nasir Adderley (Chargers)

42.(+) Jalen Thompson (Cardinals)

41.(20) Anthony Harris (Eagles)

40.(21) Eddie Jackson (Bears)

39.(37) Rodney McLeod (Colts)

38.(36) Xavier Woods (Panthers)

37.(+) Bobby McCain (Commanders)

36.(50) Eric Rowe (Dolphins)

35.(+) Tracy Walker (Lions)

34.(+) Jayron Kearse (Cowboys)

33.(+) Jevon Holland (Dolphins)

32.(27) Justin Reid (Chiefs)

31.(23) Chuck Clark (Ravens)

30.(26) Kamren Curl (Commanders)

29.(35) Juan Thornhill (Chiefs)

28.(17) Jimmie Ward (49ers)

27.(38) Jeremy Chinn (Panthers)

26.(+) Amani Hooker (Titans)

25.(19) Darnell Savage (Packers)

24.(42) Jordan Whitehead (Jets)

23.(7) Marcus Maye (Saints)

22.(48) Kyle Dugger (Patriots)

21.(+) Xavier McKinney (Giants)

20.(9) Jamal Adams (Seahawks)

19.(46) Jordan Fuller (Rams)

18.(18) Devin McCourty (Patriots)

17.(30) Vonn Bell (Bengals)

16.(40) Quandre Diggs (Seahawks)

15.(+) Adrian Phillips (Patriots)

14.(11) Tyrann Mathieu (Saints)

13.(13) Budda Baker (Cardinals)

12.(4) John Johnson III (Browns)

11.(14) Jordan Poyer (Bills)

10.(8) Jessie Bates III (Bengals)

9.(5) Minkah Fitzpatrick (Steelers)

8.(6) Adrian Amos (Packers)

7.(25) Antoine Winfield Jr. (Buccaneers)

6.(16) Derwin James (Chargers)

5.(1) Harrison Smith (Vikings)

4.(3) Justin Simmons (Broncos)

3.(12) Micah Hyde (Bills)

2.(2) Marcus Williams (Ravens)

1.(10) Kevin Byard (Titans)

2022 NBA Mock Draft

Good news fellow Celtics fans: the 2022-23 NBA season is already here!!!! The NBA's patented, whiplash-inducing rapid transition from the end of the Finals to Draft night officially occurs tonight. While the 2022 prospect pool doesn't seem like it's going to generate a lot of fireworks outside of the top 5-8 guys off the board, the trade market for established players could add some consistent excitement to the proceedings tonight. Some solid players have already gotten traded for picks (Jerami Grant, Christian Wood) and there are at least a handful of other vets including John Collins, OG Anunoby, Kyle Kuzma, Malcolm Brogdon and Mattias Thybulle that could also be on the move tonight as teams look to add some veteran pieces before free agency officially starts a week from tomorrow. Circling back to the evening's scheduled centerpiece event, here are the 58 names I expect to be called at some point tonight. 

1st round:

1.Orlando Magic: Jabari Smith Jr., power forward (Auburn)

2.Oklahoma City Thunder: Chet Holmgren, power forward/center (Gonzaga)

3.Houston Rockets: Paolo Banchero, power forward (Duke)

4.Sacramento Kings: Jaden Ivey, shooting guard (Purdue)

5.Detroit Pistons: Keegan Murray, small/power forward (Iowa)

6.Indiana Pacers: Bennedict Mathurin, shooting guard/small forward (Arizona)

7.Portland Trail Blazers: Dyson Daniels, point/shooting guard (G League Ignite) 

8.New Orleans Pelicans: Jeremy Sochan, power forward (Baylor)

9.San Antonio Spurs: Ousmaine Dieng, shooting guard/small forward (New Zealand Breakers) 

10.Washington Wizards: Shaedon Sharpe, shooting guard (Kentucky)

11.New York Knicks: Jalen Duren, center (Memphis)

12.Oklahoma City Thunder: A.J. Griffin, small forward (Duke)

13.Charlotte Hornets: Mark Williams, center (Duke)

14.Cleveland Cavaliers: Johnny Davis, shooting guard (Wisconsin)

15.Charlotte Hornets: Ochai Agbaji, shooting guard/small forward (Kansas)

16.Atlanta Hawks: Jalen Williams, shooting guard (Santa Clara)

17.Houston Rockets: Dalen Terry, point/shooting guard (Arizona)

18.Chicago Bulls: Blake Wesley, shooting guard (Notre Dame)

19.Minnesota Timberwolves: Malaki Branham, shooting guard (Ohio State)

20.San Antonio Spurs: TyTy Washington, point guard (Kentucky)

21.Denver Nuggets: Wendell Moore Jr., shooting guard/small forward (Duke)

22.Memphis Grizzlies: MarJon Beauchamp, small forward (G League Ignite)

23.Philadelphia 76ers: Tari Eason, power forward (LSU)

24.Milwaukee Bucks: EJ Liddel, power forward (Ohio State)

25.San Antonio Spurs: Ismael Kamagate, center (Paris Basketball)

26.Dallas Mavericks (pick going to Houston in the Christian Wood trade): Walker Kessler, center (Auburn) 

27.Miami Heat: Nikola Jovice, small forward (Mega Mozzart)

28.Golden State Warriors: Jake LaRavia, power forward (Wake Forest)

29.Memphis Grizzlies: Christian Koloko, center (Arizona)

30.Oklahoma City Thunder (pick going to Denver): Kennedy Chandler, point guard (Tennessee) 

2nd round

31.Indiana Pacers: Christian Braun, shooting guard/small forward (Kansas)

32.Orlando Magic: Trevor Keels, shooting guard/small forward (Duke)

33.Toronto Raptors: Jaden Hardy, shooting guard (G League Ignite)

34.Oklahoma City Thunder: Kendall Brown, small forward (Baylor)

35.Orlando Magic: Ryan Rollins, point/shooting guard (Toledo)

36.Portland Trail Blazers (being traded to Detroit in Jermai Grant trade): Andrew Newhard, point guard (Gonzaga)

37.Sacramento Kings: Patrick Baldwin Jr., small/power forward (Milwaukee) 

38.San Antonio Spurs: Caleb Houstan, small forward (Michigan)

39.Cleveland Cavaliers: David Roddy, power forward (Colorado State)

40.Minnesota Timberwolves: JD Davison, point guard (Alabama)

41.New Orleans Pelicans: Max Christie, shooting guard/small forward (Michigan State)

42.New York Knicks: Bryce McGowens, shooting guard (Nebraska)

43.Los Angeles Clippers: Justin Lewis, small/power forward (Marquette)

44.Atlanta Hawks: Josh Minott, small/power forward (Memphis)

45.Charlotte Hornets: Jean Montero, point guard (Overtime Elite)

46.Detroit Pistons (being traded to Portland in Jermai Grant trade): Jaylin Williams, power forward (Arkansas)

47.Memphis Grizzlies: Jabari Walker, power forward (Colorado)

48.Minnesota Timberwolves: Gabriele Procida, small forward (Fortitudo Bologna) 

49.Sacramento Kings: Michael Foster Jr., power forward (G League Ignite)

50.Minnesota Timberwolves: John Butler, power forward (Florida State)

51.Golden State Warriors: Karlo Matkovic, small/power forward (Mega Mozzart)

52.New Orleans Pelicans: Ron Harper Jr., small forward (Rutgers)

53.Boston Celtics: Peyton Watson, small forward (UCLA)

54.Washington Wizards: Trevion Williams, power forward/center (Purdue) 

55.Golden State Warriors: Yannick Nzosa, center (Unicaja)

56.Cleveland Cavaliers: Dominick Barlow, power forward (Overtime Elite)

57.Portland Trail Blazers: Dereon Seabron, small forward (NC State)

58.Indiana Pacers: Hugo Besson, shooting guard (New Zealand Breakers) 

Ethan Hawke Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Ethan Hawke-whose latest project "The Black Phone" arrives in theaters tomorrow. 

Ethan Hawke's Filmography Ranked:

20.Cut Throat City (D-)

19.Dead Poets Society (D)

18.Reality Bites (C+)

17.Juliet, Naked (C+)

16.Brookyln's Finest (C+)

15.The Purge (C+)

14.Daybreakers (B-)

13.Assault on Precinct 13 (B)

12.In a Valley of Violence (B)

11.Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (B)

10.Predestination (B)

9.First Reformed (B)

8.Sinister (B)

7.Lord of War (B+)

6.The Guilty (B+)

5.The Northman (B+)

4.Before the Devil Knows You're Dead (B+)

3.The Magnificent Seven (A-)

2.Boyhood (A)

1.Training Day (A+)

Top Dog: Training Day (2001)

Antonie Fuqua secured his permanent place in cinema history 21 years ago. After dropping a pair of middling studio action movies (The Replacement Killers, Bait) that weren't exactly the type of works that would help someone build a lengthy career as a Hollywood director, Fuqua helmed one of the most essential crime movies in the history of film. Training Day has served as the blueprint for corrupt cop stories for the past 2 decades and nothing outside of The Departed has been able to match or exceed its intensity, grime and unapologetic brutality. The interplay between Washington's terrifying corrupt narcotics officer Alonzo Harris and Hawke's naive beat cop Jake Hoyt is fucking electrifying, the fearless, mesmerizing performances from Washington and Hawke are the stuff of legend and its criminal underworld has a constant sense of danger running through it that keeps the tension level high in nearly every scene.       

Bottom Feeder: Cut Throat City (2020)

After finding some success with the campy martial arts splatter movie The Man with the Iron Fists, RZA got a little too ambitious with his follow-up directorial effort Cut Throat City. By bafflingly turning a fairly basic heist setup (a group of four desperate friends in Post-Katrina New Orleans decide to rob a casino to try and get out of poverty) into an increasingly convoluted crime saga that picks up new characters/plot threads in nearly every scene, Cut Throat City goes down as a dishearteningly  sloppy and downright incoherent film that is easily among the most maddening movies I've seen in recent years.  

Most Underrated: The Magnificent Seven (2016)

Speaking of Fuqua, The Magnificent Seven is the most slept-on movie in his filmography. The remake of a remake justifies its existence by letting its heroes (Denzel Washington, Chris Pratt, Hawke, Vincent D'onofrio, Byung-hun Lee, Manuel Garcia-Ruflo, Martin Sensmeier) be deeply charismatic badasses and its main villain (Peter Sarsgaard) be an old school moustache-twirling shitbag, delivering terrific action sequences that have some great bits of humor seamlessly weaved into them and packing a whole lot of energy and style into every single frame.   

Most Overrated: Dead Poets Society (1989)

Watching this and Rain Man in such close proximity has really opened my eyes to the shameless tackiness some of these late 80's awards bait dramas possessed. There isn't a sincere emotion, thought or character on display in this whole fucking movie, which becomes especially apparent during its over-the-top contrived final act that features plenty of world class moments of sickeningly deceptive melodrama. On top all of that nauseating crap, it also happens to be every bit as drearily dull as a coming-of-age story set at an elite prep school in 1959 sounds on paper.  

Top Crowning Cinematic Achievement: Boyhood (2014)

Boyhood is a cinematic snapshot where the viewer is invited to observe how a group of characters progress over a 12-year period. Giving people an opportunity to watch a set of characters navigate the many highs and lows life delivers and how those experiences shape individuals over an extended period of time allows for an incredible degree of character development and raw, honest emotions to make it to the screen. Richard Linklater, Ellar Coltrane, Patricia Arquette, Hawke and Lorelei Linklater should feel a tremendous amount of pride for their involvement in making something that beautifully captures what it's like to grow up and be a parent in a world that's far from perfect.        

Reminder of Just How Great an Actor He Is: First Reformed (2018)

Hawke has had such a long, busy career as a prominent character actor that I think a lot of film fans took his talent for granted for a number of years. His performance in First Reformed seems to have finally put a stop to that. Not only did the emotionally complex, intellectually curious character of Pastor Ernes Toller provide him with the chance to really show off his range, but it was the rare opportunity for him to lead a movie and having him be at the center of the story makes the bold, unexpected path this film sets down as it progresses more convincing than it would've been in the hands of a less daring performer.      

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 50 Cornerbacks

 ()=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021

50.(+) Mike Hughes (Lions)

49.(37) Jackrabbit Jenkins (Free Agent)

48.(44) L'Jarius Sneed (Chiefs)

47.(29) Troy Hill (Rams)

46.(45) Cameron Dantzler (Vikings)

45.(+) Kristian Fulton (Titans)

44.(+) Emmanuel Moseley (49ers)

43.(+) Sidney Jones (Seahawks)

42.(+) Rasul Douglas (Packers)

41.(+) Rashad Fenton (Chiefs)

40.(+) Levi Wallace (Steelers)

39.(+) Avonte Maddox (Eagles)

38.(+) Nate Hobbs (Raiders)

37.(+) Chauncey Gardner-Johnson (Saints)

36.(+) Eric Stokes (Packers)

35.(+) Greg Newsome II (Browns)

34.(+) Jalen Mills (Patriots)

33.(12) Steven Nelson (Texans)

32.(+) Taron Johnson (Bills)

31.(24) Jonathan Jones (Patriots)

30.(14) William Jackson III (Commanders)

29.(40) Charvarius Ward (49ers)

28.(+) Jaylon Johnson (Bears)

27.(+) Patrick Surtain II (Broncos)

26.(36) Shaq Griffin (Jaguars)

25.(13) Darious Williams (Jaguars)

24.(28) Mike Hilton (Bengals)

23.(43) D.J. Reed Jr. (Jets)

22.(9) Byron Jones (Dolphins)

21.(49) Trevon Diggs (Cowboys)

20.(8) James Bradberry (Eagles)

19.(3) Stephon Gilmore (Colts)

18.(34) Kendall Fuller (Commanders)

17.(31) Casey Hayward Jr. (Falcons)

16.(16) Carlton Davis (Buccaneers)

15.(+) Chidobe Awuzie (Bengals)

14.(7) Marcus Peters (Ravens)

13.(25) Jamel Dean (Buccaneers)

12.(10) Kenny Moore (Colts)

11.(26) Adoree' Jackson (Giants)

10.(6) Tre'Davious White (Bills)

9.(11) Denzel Ward (Browns)

8.(5) Marlon Humphrey (Ravens)

7.(+) A.J. Terrell (Falcons)

6.(4) Xavien Howard (Dolphins)

5.(17) Marshon Lattimore (Saints)

4.(22) Darius Slay (Eagles)

3.(21) J.C. Jackson (Chargers)

2.(1) Jaire Alexander (Packers)

1.(2) Jalen Ramsey (Rams)

Movie Review: Lightyear

At the start of Lightyear, a brief title card explains that this 1995 movie was what birthed the Buzz Lightyear toy line in Toy Story was based on and that it was the favorite movie of a young Andy Davis. As Lightyear progressed, my mind kept returning to this framing device. The naturally more cynical and critical adult mind will have a field day pointing out the abundance of plot holes and unfavorably comparing it to other Pixar titles that have more emotional weight and higher narrative ambitions. But to be honest, those flaws aren't particularly relevant since Lightyear isn't intended to speak to or dazzle the people of legal voting age that choose to watch it. In the world in which Toy Story takes place, this is a movie something that captured the imagination and heart of a child and while too much time has gone by for me to fully access the part of my brain that viewed everything with a wide-eyed glee, Lightyear is something that I fully can see a real kid loving just as much as Andy did.

Lightyear is one of those movies where space just looks and feels like this magical place where cool stuff is always happening. Rockets are flying around at warp speed, people are shooting laser beams at each other and there's helpful, adorable robots that are aiming to help people achieve their goals instead of murdering them in their sleep. Add some funny, likable sidekicks (voiced by Keke Palmer, Peter Sohn, Taika Waititi and Dale Soules) that help Buzz Lightyear (who is voiced by Chris Evans this time around) shed his selfishness to become the hero he was born to be and a happy ending where everybody is basking in the glory of friendship and getting the job done and you've created a really fun, hopeful adventure that 5–8-year olds around the globe will be watching repeatably for years to come. A piece of art that is geared towards kids may not be the most impressive display of craftsmanship or the strongest bet to have a lasting cultural impact, but the sentimental or spiritual value they can hold for individuals gives them an unsung yet essential purpose. Lightyear is something that will certainly inspire some young people to fall in love with science fiction/movies on the whole or maybe even pursue a career in the space exploration field and if that's the case, it met its goals and then some.   

Grade: B 

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 25 Inside Linebackers

=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021 

25.(+) Jordyn Brooks (Seahawks)

24.(+) Bobby Okereke (Colts)

23.(+) David Long Jr. (Titans)

22.(22) Cole Holcomb (Football Team)

21.(6) Deion Jones (Falcons)

20.(+) Jerome Baker (Dolphins)

19.(25) Denzel Perryman (Raiders)

18.(23) Leighton Vander Esch (Cowboys)

17.(+) Anthony Walker (Browns)

16.(+) Ja'Whaun Bentley (Patriots)

15.(+) Nick Bolton (Chiefs)

14.(9) Jayon Brown (Raiders)

13.(+) Logan Wilson (Bengals)

12.(+) Pete Werner (Saints)

11.(+) T.J. Edwards (Eagles)

10.(7) Blake Martinez (Giants)

9.(19) Jordan Hicks (Vikings)

8.(12) Zach Cunningham (Titans)

7.(8) Roquan Smith (Bears)

6.(+) De'Vondre Campbell (Packers)

5.(3) Eric Kendricks (Vikings)

4.(1) Bobby Wagner (Rams)

3.(5) Fred Warner (49ers)

2.(4) Demario Davis (Saints)

1.(2) Lavonte David (Buccaneers)

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 35 Outside Linebackers

()=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021

35.(+) Uchenna Nwosu (Seahawks)

34.(+) Odafe Oweh (Ravens)

33.(+) Kyzir White (Eagles)

32.(28) Lorenzo Carter (Falcons)

31.(+) Melvin Ingram (Dolphins)

30.(13) Kyle Van Noy (Chargers)

29.(+) Samson Ebukam (49ers)

28.(+) Markus Golden (Cardinals)

27.(+) Jeremiah Owusu-Koramoah (Browns)

26.(17) Bradley Chubb (Broncos)

25.(19) Andrew Van Ginkel (Dolphins)

24.(31) Shaq Thompson (Panthers)

23.(29) Harold Landry (Titans)

22.(+) Randy Gregory (Broncos)

21.(27) Alex Highsmith (Steelers)

20.(24) Tyus Bowser (Ravens)

19.(9) Leonard Floyd (Rams)

18.(8) Bud Dupree (Titans)

17.(3) Za'Darius Smith (Vikings)

16.(+) Justin Houston (Free Agent)

15.(14) Matt Milano (Bills)

14.(+) Rashan Gary (Packers)

13.(15) Matthew Judon (Patriots)

12.(23) Haason Reddick (Eagles)

11.(5) Chandler Jones (Raiders)

10.(16) Preston Smith (Packers)

9.(+) Josh Allen (Jaguars)

8.(+) Micah Parsons (Cowboys)

7(+) .Danielle Hunter (Vikings)

6.(+) Maxx Crosby (Raiders)

5.(7) Darius Leonard (Colts)

4.(4) Shaq Barrett (Buccaneers)

3.(1) Khalil Mack (Chargers)

2.(+) Joey Bosa (Chargers)

1.(2) T.J. Watt (Steelers)

Chris Evans Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Chris Evans-whose latest project "Lightyear" opens in theaters tomorrow.  

Chris Evans' Filmography Ranked:

23.What's Your Number? (D-)

22.Avengers: Age of Ultron (D+)

21.Sunshine (D+)

20.Playing It Cool (C)

19.Captain America: The First Avenger (C+)

18.Push (C+)

17.Fantastic Four (C+)

16.The Perfect Score (C+)

15.Fantastic Four: Rise of Silver Surfer (C+)

14.TMNT (C+)

13.Captain America: The Winter Solider (C+)

12.The Losers (B)

11.Not Another Teen Movie (B)

10.Captain America: Civil War (B)

9.Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (B)

8.Gifted (B)

7.Snowpiercer (B)

6.Cellular (B+)

5.Street Kings (B+)

4.The Avengers (B+)

3.Knives Out (B+)

2.Avengers: Endgame (A-)

1.Avengers: Infinity War (A)

Top Dog: Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

While it's not my favorite MCU movie, Infinity War may be the impressive triumph of the entire franchise to date. It deftly balances the individual plights of its large collection of characters with the introduction of an incredible villain in Thanos and its dedication to building an uneasy atmosphere helps convey the scale of the stakes and the threat Thanos' plan poses to the world.

Bottom Feeder: What's Your Number? (2011)

Time to break out the classic What's Your Number? spiel for the 600th time!!! Despite having a cast that's filled with very charismatic, funny actors including Anna Farris, Evans, Ed Begley Jr., Blythe Danner and Andy Samberg, What's Your Number? manages to be one of the laziest, cringiest and flat-out painful romantic comedies that I've ever seen.

Most Underrated: Street Kings (2008)

The little-seen summer 2020 VOD causality The Tax Collector, already forgotten Netflix blockbuster Bright and seemingly eternal discourse about the degree of his involvement in producing the widely loathed theatrical cut of Suicide Squad has overshadowed the string of great crime flicks David Ayer was responsible for from 2001-14. Even with the John Wick-induced public embrace of Keanu Reeves that has taken place over the past 5 or so years, Ayer's sophomore directorial effort Street Kings hasn't garnered any renewed attention. While it's fair to say that it treads on similar gritty ground as Ayer's most celebrated work Training Day and his directorial debut Harsh Times, Street Kings is still a slick, well-acted and very entertaining corrupt cops vs. honorable cops saga.  

Most Overrated: Captain America: The Winter Solider (2014)

There's plenty of good things to say about The Winter Solider: Anthony Mackie's charisma, dramatic acting and chemistry with Evans made him a terrific addition to the MCU ensemble, the fight choreography is consistently impressive and after a rocky introduction in The First Avenger, Evans proved that he was the right choice to play Steve Rodgers/Captain America with his very assured performance here. However, many of those positives are overshadowed by its brutal pacing, flat visuals and a thoroughly incoherent espionage plot that heavily involves a terrible character from the previous movie that should've never returned under any circumstances.

Top Movie That Has Likely Only Been Referenced as a Trivia Answer in the Past 10-15 Years: The Perfect Score (2004)   

I would love to know how many times some variation of the question "What was the name of the first movie Chris Evans and Scarlett Johansson starred in together?" has been asked at trivia nights around the world as well as how many people have actually gotten the answer right. The Perfect Score belongs in a camp of innocuous, commercially unsuccessful 2000's comedies alongside Stealing Harvard, Big Trouble and Corky Romano where the plot (a bunch of teenagers attempt to steal the answers to the SAT's) is ultimately more memorable than the movie itself. The biggest difference between The Perfect Score and those other films though is that they didn't happen to feature two future superstars in leading roles, which makes it far more noteworthy than its disposable peers by default.  

Movie Review: Jurassic World Dominion

Over the course of the past 24 years, the Jurassic Park sequels have set a standard of breathtaking stupidity that is truly first rate. Just like the unsuspecting scientists who were transported to John Hammond's theme park in the 1993 original, audiences watching these films have experienced things that they could've never even dreamed of. 

The Jurassic World trilogy has taken things a step further by injecting that stupidity with an amount of PED's that hasn't been seen since BALCO got shut down. The brain cell-eviscerating audacity of the events that have occurred over the course of the past two films has put Jurassic World into this exceptionally weird space where pure and unintentionally funny forms of entertainment work together in blissful harmony. So, did the gang come through and put a big bow on this extra special dumb dinosaur movie showcase? They sure as hell did!!! Not only does Dominion deliver a finale that is consistent with the tone and execution of its predecessors, but it also provides further clarity as to why this trilogy's particular brand of hijinks has made it a unique weird, enjoyable spectacle

At this juncture, accepting that the Jurassic Park sequels are just giant monster cartoons that seem like they're carefully engineered to be as ludicrous as possible is such a liberating move. Reuniting Laura Dern, Sam Neill and Jeff Goldblum for the first time in 29 years wasn't going to suddenly revert this series back to its wonder-filled adventure roots. This franchise is pretty much just Fast and Furious with dinosaurs instead of cars and little-to-no-self-awareness now and embracing that idea has made these movies so much more enjoyable to watch. 

Anything is feasible when the confines of reality and logic are abandoned and that really gives director Colin Trevorrow and his writing partner Emily Carmichael (Pacific Rim: Uprising) carte blanche to run fucking wild. Want to have Chris Pratt prevent the death of another character by choking out the dinosaur that's trying to kill them? Go for it. How about using the introduction of some giant, genetically engineered locusts to help build the bridge that brings the two generations of Jurassic stars together? Well, that's certainly less forced than the hooks of most legacy sequels while also being completely on brand for this silly/bonkers franchise. A completely out of left field redemption for a character that doesn't at all deserve it? Sure, why not. The brand's commitment to breeding whacky nonsense remains impressively relentless and the fruits of the creator's labor are felt with every laugh, sigh and confused facial expression they get from the viewer. 

  

This commitment to delivering abundant idiocy also paves the way for tremendous action scenes like a 15-minute chase/fight sequence where a bunch of dinosaurs get loose on the island of Malta and a really tense sequence where Bryce Dallas Howard has to crawl, swim and hide underwater from a new apex predator dinosaur immediately after escaping another near-death situation. Dinosaur action is clearly the primary appeal of the franchise and if committing to over-the-top idiocy plays a role in making these scenes exciting, then it's ultimately a net positive that's worth celebrating. 

Dominion is the energetic, entertaining ode to melting brain cells that the Jurassic World-era needed to end on. While it might not have ever reached the invigoratingly over-the-top heights of the aforementioned Fast and Furious sequels, Jurassic World's brazenly idiotic DNA ensured that these films never became sterile or lacked fun. Each installment provided a new opportunity to warmly embrace the soothing comforts of idiocy and for the most part, the Jurassic World trilogy delivered in that area even more than the prior pair of sequels did. When Universal inevitably decides to revive the Jurassic Park franchise in 3-5 years' time, they need to continue the tradition of delivering earth-shattering stupidity, cool dinosaur action and absolutely nothing else. Building a legacy takes a lot of time and hard work and the last thing the world needs right now is some smart, ambitious filmmaker coming in and making a sophisticated modern Jurassic Park movie. The Jurassic Park sequels are solely for the idiot weirdos of the world and now isn't the time to put a stop to this beautiful 24-year run of dumbass cinema because some people that have things like "taste" and "intelligence" think these movies stink.  

          

Grade: B

Movie Review: Hustle

 

Commenting on the lack of surprises present in Netflix's new sports drama Hustle is like complaining about how many massive balloons appear at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. The adversity that sets up the conflict in underdog sports stories always involves some kind of melodramatic issues with family, addiction or some major mistake from the past continuing to burden a character in the present (Hustle is only missing the addiction angle) and the ending is a feel-good triumph where an individual or team accomplishes their goals. Sticking to the playbook that any regular viewer of sports dramas in any of the past 4 decades knows by heart at this point in time may limit the heights Hustle is able to reach on the overall quality scale, but it's still able to find plenty of success within this well-worn classic framework that we don't see utilized as much these days.

What gives Hustle the heart and soul it needs to fulfil its storytelling objectives is its cast. Everything on the technical and storytelling ends of Hustle save for the horrendous Bohemian Rhapsody-esque frantic editing is so plain that it's not really making much of an impact one way or the other on the overall product, which puts the actors in a precarious spot where they have to do all of the heavy lifting themselves. Fortunately, the brain trust of Hustle assembled a group that was more than up to the challenge of shining brightly enough to carry an entire movie on their backs.

Let me be clear: These performances aren't the type of acting achievements that will go on to create awards buzz or be cited as a top highlight in any of the non-athlete's acting careers. What they do pull off however is something that's still pretty extraordinary: they help create a level of emotional investment in what is effectively a collection of stock character archetypes- which include Adam Sandler's washed-up pro scout/coach for the 76ers, Juancho Hernangomez's talented, but hot-headed streetball player who is trying to fight his way into the NBA, Ben Foster's smug, clueless 2nd generation sports owner and Anthony Edwards' arrogant hotshot prospect who becomes the rival of Hernangomez's character during the pre-draft process-that wouldn't have been there if they were in less spirited hands. You have a sincere desire to see the heroes succeed, the villains be toppled and the long, painful road to the top of the mountain be conquered, which is really all a movie like Hustle needs to do to execute its gameplan. There's already been several movies released this year (and there will surely be several more) that have better overall performances, but Hustle is going to be at or near the top of the list of movies where the believability and humanity behind the acting made the biggest impact on the overall product.      

Grade: B

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 35 Defensive Tackles

()=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021 

35.(+) Armon Watts (Vikings)

34.(+) Christian Barmore (Patriots)

33.(+) Maliek Collins (Texans)

32.(+) Matt Ioannadis (Panthers)

31.(22) Sebastian Joseph-Day (Chargers)

30.(+) DaQuan Jones (Bills)

29.(24) Daron Payne (Commanders)

28.(29) Derrick Brown (Panthers)

27.(+) Greg Gaines (Rams)

26.(16) Lawrence Guy (Patriots)

25.(+) Shy Tuttle (Saints)

24.(+) D.J. Jones (Broncos)

23.(27) Michael Pierce (Ravens)

22.(25) Grover Stewart (Colts)

21.(+) Ed Oliver (Bills)

20.(12) Quinnen Williams (Jets)

19.(+) B.J. Hill (Bengals)

18.(5) Fletcher Cox (Eagles)

17.(+) Dexter Lawrence (Giants)

16.(14) Poona Ford (Seahawks)

15.(13) Javon Hargrave (Eagles)

14.(18) David Onyemata (Saints)

13.(10) Dalvin Tomlinson (Vikings)

12.(3) Grady Jarrett (Falcons)

11.(6) Kenny Clark (Packers)

10.(15) D.J. Reader (Bengals)

9.(+) Christian Wilkins (Dolphins)

8.(+) Jeffrey Simmons (Titans)

7.(7) Vita Vea (Buccaneers)

6.(+) Arik Armstead (49ers)

5.(11) Jonathan Allen (Commanders)

4.(4) DeForest Buckner (Colts)

3.(2) Chris Jones (Chiefs)

2.(+) Cameron Heyward (Steelers)

1.(1) Aaron Donald (Rams)

Jurassic Park/World Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best. On this week's special edition, I rank the Jurassic Park/World franchise. 

5.Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018):

Deciding to revisit and expand upon the "using dinosaurs as military weapons" subplot from Jurassic World sends Fallen Kingdom down an extraordinarily stupid path that results in a project that is equal parts bad ridiculous and fun ridiculous. The major final act reveal involving the Maise Lockwood character (Isabella Sermon) caused what remains one of the hardest laughing fits I've ever had in a movie theater.

Grade: C+

4.Jurassic Park III (2001):

The near consensus pick for the worst Jurassic Park movie is unquestionably bolstered here by the fact that it was the 2nd Jurassic Park movie I'd watched, and I was 9 or 10 when I saw it. The introduction of the Spinosaurus as a new alpha dinosaur was cool as hell, Sam Neill's return as Dr. Alan Grant was welcome and the kid (Trevor Morgan) hanging out in an overturned supply truck and living off of expired candy bars really made the most out of being stranded on a dinosaur-filled island for a few months.   

Grade: B-

3.The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997):

In retrospect, The Lost World's primary contribution to the Jurassic franchise was confirming early on that the original was lightning in a bottle. No attempt at creating more extravagant dinosaur setpieces, effort to bring in a new group of talented actors (Julianne Moore, Vince Vaughn, Peter Stormare, Pete Postlethwaite) or return of a key player from its predecessor (Steven Spielberg, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough) could help The Lost World replicate the blockbuster magic that Jurassic Park so effortlessly and abundantly possessed.  

Grade: B

2.Jurassic World (2015):

Returning to the Jurassic Park well after 15 years away from a world where humans were stupid enough to bring dinosaurs back to life and put them in a theme park was definitely pretty fun. Chris Pratt-who was still riding the new charismatic action hero high he received from Guardians of the Galaxy- gives a really magnetic lead performance as cool guy raptor handler Owen Grady, the tense, energetic dinosaur action is easily the best since the original and the idiotic, melodramatic absurdity that derailed Fallen Kingdom is at a much more palatable level here.   

Grade: B

1.Jurassic Park (1993):

Escapism doesn't really get any purer than Jurassic Park.  Steven Spielberg transports the audience into a world where dinosaurs are living among humans and allows them to feel every ounce of wonder and fear that the characters experience during their 2-hour journey on the grounds. It's one of those timeless works that will continue to introduce people to the uniquely spellbinding power that top-tier blockbuster entertainment has for generations to come, and no amount of not overly impressive sequels will be able to soften its enduring legacy.  

Grade: A 

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 35 Defensive Ends

=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021

35.(+) Kwity Paye (Colts)

34.(+) Deatrich Wise Jr. (Patriots)

33.(+) Gregory Rousseau (Bills)

32.(+) Dean Lowry (Packers)

31.(+) Chris Wormley (Steelers)

30.(+) Harrison Phillips (Vikings)

29.(+) Charles Harris (Lions)

28.(+) Trevis Gibson (Bears)

27.(20) Carl Lawson (Jets)

26.(+) A'Shawn Robinson (Rams)

25.(+) Shelby Harris (Seahawks)

24.(+) Josh Sweat (Eagles)

23.(+) Sam Hubbard (Bengals)

22.(+) Jonathan Greenard (Texans)

21.(8) Brandon Graham (Eagles)

20.(+) Akiem Hicks (Buccaneers)

19.(14) Jerry Hughes (Texans)

18.(22) Brian Burns (Panthers)

17.(17) Jadeveon Clowney (Browns)

16.(21) Montez Sweat (Commanders)

15.(+) Denico Autry (Titans)

14.(+) John Franklin-Myers (Jets)

13.(35) Marcus Davenport (Saints)

12.(6) J.J. Watt (Cardinals)

11.(13) Chase Young (Commanders)

10.(32) Emmanuel Ogbah (Dolphins)

9.(7) Leonard Williams (Giants)

8.(10) Calias Campbell (Ravens)

7.(+) Robert Quinn (Bears)

6.(5) DeMarcus Lawrence (Cowboys)

5.(29) Trey Hendrickson (Bengals)

4.(+) Von Miller (Bills)

3.(19) Nick Bosa (49ers)

2.(1) Cameron Jordan (Saints)

1.(4) Myles Garrett (Browns)

Quick Movie Reviews: Emergency, Crimes of the Future, Watcher, Fire Island

Emergency: Following the leads of past Sundance breakouts including Damian Chazelle (Whiplash) and James Wan (Saw), director Carey Williams and writer KD Davila hit a home run by adapting their own short film into a feature. Emergency is a damn near perfect coming-of-age tale that organically mines situational comedy, multi-faceted social commentary, suspense and heartfelt odes to the power of true friendship out of a story about three black and Latino college students (Donald Elise Watkins, RJ Cyler, Sebastain Chacon) whose plans for an epic night of partying gets suddenly foiled when they return to their apartment and find an unconscious white girl (Maddie Nichols) passed out in their living room. Davila's clever writing creates a believable, unpredictable balance of silly college movie hijinks and the sobering reality that every choice these three young men make during the night could be the difference between life and death, Williams directs with the poise of a 20-year yet as he gracefully navigates the tricky tonal balance this material presents to create a piece of work that's truly dynamic and the main trio of actors do an incredible job of being goofy, vulnerable and authentic to their individual characters throughout the course of this night that will change their lives and relationships with one another forever. Emergency is an endearing gem of a movie and I hope that it'll be able to overcome Amazon's reliably dismal marketing efforts and find some degree of a meaningful audience on Prime Video in the coming months.         

Grade: A-

Crimes of the Future: David Cronenberg was so excited to return to the body horror genre for the first time in 23 years that he overstuffed and undercooked the hell out of the script. There's so many loose plot threads, secret organizations and mutilated weirdos milling about in the dystopian art world hellscape Cronenberg builds in Crimes of the Future that it's difficult to draw connections as to how they're all intertwined and what exactly each entity/individual is motivated by. As deeply messy as it is, Crimes of the Future makes up for some of its unfocused storytelling sins by filling most of these unexplored narrative rabbit holes with an abundance of intrigue. Cronenberg has created a richly atmospheric world where advances in evolution are rapidly stomped out by the government, an absence of physical pain among the bulk of the population has caused people to become fascinated by, physically attracted to and even envious of the people that do feel it and people have become so obsessed with changing their appearance and desire to feel pain again that various cosmetic surgeries are being performed on every street corner. Even when what's being presented on the screen doesn't make total sense, the images and worldbuilding are never less than fascinating. With more fleshed-out writing and a couple more performances that are as mesmerizingly nutty as Kristen Stewart's supporting turn as a meek government agent who becomes downright smitten with a famous organ-removing performance artist (Viggo Mortensen), this probably would've been a really freaky, darkly comedic sci-fi horror standout.       

Grade: B-

Watcher: Joining Carey Williams on the list of directors to watch from this year's edition of Sundance is Chloe Okuno. Her feature debut Watcher is an expertly made classical psychological thriller about an American woman named Julia (Maika Monroe, adding another notch to her unheralded scream queen belt) that has just moved from New York to Bucharest, Romania for her husband's (Karl Glusman) marketing job who feels she's being watched and followed by a man (Burn Gorman) who lives in the building directly across from their apartment complex. Small decisions like setting the film in a foreign country where Julia doesn't know the language and is unemployed in a place where she doesn't know anyone allows the feelings of isolation, unease and fear plenty of room to gradually build before they hit a nerve-shredding crescendo in the chilling final 15 minutes that validates both Julia's fears and Okuno's slow burn approach to thriller filmmaking. Watcher is just a hell of a way to spend 90 minutes in a movie theater and I can't wait to see what paranoia-inducing nightmare Okuno can come up with next.     

Grade: B+

Fire Island: Although the slightly melancholic subtext of a group of gay friends (Joel Kim Booster, Bowen Yang, Matt Rodgers, Tomas Matos, Torian Miller) in their early 30's coming to the unfortunate realization that the carefree days of their youth and the traditions that are associated with them are about to come to an end loom over the party like an ominous gray cloud on a summer afternoon, Fire Island-which shares a name with the popular New York LGBTQ tourist destination off the coast of Long Island-manages to savor as much light as possible before the storm comes in. There's plenty of time to solemnly reflect on the metaphorical death of one's youth, but until that moment arrives, spending your last hoorah in a vibrant romantic comedy wonderland where you can go from hating a stranger that you drunkenly bumped into at a beach bar to ending up on the receiving end of a creatively sappy "stop your true love before they get on a plane/train/boat and leave your life forever" moment is a pretty idyllic way to cap off a wild child era. "Laugh now, cry later" didn't become an expression for no reason and from the sea of raucous beachside party sequences to the casual orgies to the triumphant placement of Donna Summer's "Last Dance" in the final moments, Fire Island embraces that mantra to the fullest. 

Grade: B

2022 NFL Position Rankings: Top 20 Centers

()=2021 ranking

+=Unranked or not eligible in 2021 

20.(+) Ted Karras (Bengals)

19.(20) Ethan Pocic (Browns)

18.(+) Tyler Biadasz (Cowboys)

17.(+) Bradley Bozeman (Panthers)

16.(+) Matt Hennessy (Falcons)

15.(16) Mitch Morse (Bills)

14.(+) Brian Allen (Rams)

13.(19) Connor McGovern (Jets)

12.(11) Ryan Kelly (Colts)

11.(9) Erik McCoy (Saints)

10.(10) Chase Roullier (Commanders)

9.(14) Ryan Jensen (Buccaneers)

8.(+) Creed Humphrey (Chiefs)

7.(1) Rodney Hudson (Cardinals)

6.(4) Frank Ragnow (Lions)

5.(3) J.C. Tretter (Free Agent)

4.(12) David Andrews (Patriots)

3.(7) Ben Jones (Titans)

2.(5) Jason Kelce (Eagles) 

1.(2) Corey Linsley (Chargers)

Nicole Kidman Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Nicole Kidman.

Nicole Kidman's Filmography Ranked:

21.Lion (D)

20.The Others (D+)

19.The Beguiled (C-)

18.Practical Magic (C-)

17.Secret in Their Eyes (C)

16.The Paperboy (C)

15.Batman Forever (C+)

14.Days of Thunder (B-)

13.Eyes Wide Shut (B-)

12.Stoker (B-)

11.Just Go with It (B)

10.Destroyer (B)

9.The Upside (B)

8.Paddington (B)

7.Bombshell (B+)

6.Rabbit Hole (B+)

5.Being the Ricardos (B+)

4.Aquaman (B+)

3.To Die For (B+)

2.The Northman (B+)

1.The Killing of a Sacred Deer (B+)

Top Dog: The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017)

Save for all of the great 2022 releases that have been released during this chunk of the calendar, The Killing of a Sacred Deer is the best movie I've seen over the past few months. Aided by a trio of terrific performances from Colin Farrell, Barry Keoghan and Kidman and suitably woozy cinematography from Thinios Bakatakis, Yorgos Lanthimos is able to craft a dread-fueled psychological thriller that disturbs, disorients and delights in equal measure. 

Bottom Feeder: Lion (2016)

Movies like Lion never fail to drive me nuts. Using a pretty remarkable true story about an Australian man who returns to India to find his family 25 years after he was separated from them as the inspiration to make a boring, shamelessly manipulative awards-bait drama is an icky tactic that Hollywood should table forever.  

Most Underrated: To Die For (1995)

While it's not quite as dark, funny or sadistic as Mary Herron's cult classic, To Die For is a great companion piece to American Psycho. Kidman's character is a vein, narcissistic master manipulator who will do anything to become famous, Gus Van Sant does a really great job of mixing the story's blend of dark comedy, drama and thriller elements into something that's tonally cohesive and the hilarious, maniacal lead performance from Kidman makes Suzanna Stone-Moretto an unforgettable villain.       

Most Overrated: The Others (2001)

Maybe it was a different story 21 years ago when it was released, but The Others just doesn't cut it in 2022. It's neither scary nor atmospheric enough to be an effective Gothic-era haunted house movie, the pacing is sluggish and the writing-particularly in the final act where the now widely known final twist takes hold of the story-is pretty weak. About the only good thing it did do was remind me to add Gullermo del Toro's wildly underrated Crimson Peak to my future rewatch list.    

Movie Review: Top Gun: Maverick

It's very easy to argue that Tom Cruise wouldn't have the career he has today without 1986's Top Gun. While some of his early 80's work including Risky Business and The Outsiders earned him critical praise and did solid business at the box office, Top Gun was the project that cemented Cruise as a genuine movie star-which is a status that he's been able to maintain ever since. After 30+ years of moviemaking that included a few infamous clunkers (Cocktail, The Mummy, Knight and Day), becoming the face of Scientology, 3 Oscar nominations and developing a completely different hit franchise for Paramount in Mission: Impossible, Cruise has returned to the DANGER ZONE that is the United States Navy's Top Gun program. 

By definition, Top Gun: Maverick qualifies as a sequel to Top Gun. There are ample references to the original film throughout and the story predominantly deals with how Pete "Maverick" Mitchell's refusal to change his hotshot, authority-challenging ways has hurt his career and Goose's death continues to haunt him. What Top Gun: Maverick's true agenda proves to be is to function as a thinly veiled metaphor for Cruise's legacy as a performer. 

At least once every 10-15 minutes, the film puts Maverick into a situation where he gets to prove that he's a rebel whose refusal to accept the current methods of doing business in the military has made him an equally revered and hated character. His commanding officers (Jon Hamm, Ed Harris) hate that he refuses to obey orders and embrace the new ways of doing things, but they also can't deny that the old man is the best damn pilot they've ever seen. The new group of elite hotshot pilots/WSO's (Miles Teller, Glen Powell, Monica Barbaro, Lewis Pullman, Jay Ellis, Danny Ramirez, several others that don't really factor into the story much) that Maverick is brought into train think he's a washed-up burnout who can't teach them anything, but time and time again Maverick show these whippersnappers that actually don't know shit about combat or flying fighter jets. Every time a program is in danger of being shut down or a mission looks like it can't be pulled off without suffering mass casualties, Maverick comes through and shows that it can be done and that the people that doubted him are either too caught up in bureaucracy or their own fears to understand what it takes to get the job done. Cruise knows damn well that his fearlessness, passion and magnetism makes him the last old-school action star left and using Maverick as an avatar for himself is an unabashedly brazen, egomaniacal move that perfectly reflects the type of performer Cruise is and will continue to be until he retires or dies in the least exciting way imaginable.        

As distracting and quietly hilarious as it is to see Cruise use the sequel to the movie that laid the groundwork for his stardom to openly peacock about his singularity as an actor, his presence on camera and behind the scenes is the driving force behind nearly everything that works in Top Gun: Maverick. Insisting on having the actors fly in real planes in real locations during the flight sequences leads to what has to be the most breathtaking, adrenaline-fueled aerial action ever put on film. His understated acting chops allow Maverick to serve as a guilt-ridden surrogate father to Goose's son Rooster (Teller) that's tortured by the part he played in causing Goose's death and Rooster's resentment towards him because of it, which eventually culminates in some well-earned emotional moments in the final few scenes. His vintage movie star bravado makes Maverick's real-world superhero schtick work like a charm, no matter how fucking silly it gets (and holy shit, does it get really dumb at times). Having a universe that orbits around Cruise means that you're in the hands of somebody that gives a shit about the art of filmmaking and even though every bite isn't anywhere near perfect, that's a recipe that will ultimately churn out that's something worthwhile 100% of the time.              

Grade: B