Album Review: Lil Yachty-Teenage Emotions

Of all the pop/trap rappers that have drawn the ire of "real" hip-hop fans recently, Lil Yachty has arguably received the most criticism. Seemingly every bitter old-timer (Joe Budden, Ebro and Charlamagne tha God,  who dubbed Yachty the "poster child for wack rappers") in the hip-hop community has come out of the woodwork to yell at Lil Boat about the quality of music and his "lack of respect" for the genre's legends (Yachty famously said in an interview with Pitchfork last November that he believes Notorious B.I.G. is overrated).

As ashamed as I am to admit it, I'm also guilty of hopping aboard the trendy Lil Yachty hate train. I spent the latter half of 2016 extensively ripping his Lil Boat mixtape and declaring him the worst rapper in the game right now. However over the last few months, I've completely changed my tune on Yachty. He's a festively jovial 19-year old kid that is solely focused on having fun with his music and hating him because of that is a dick move. This personal Lil Boat renaissance has culminated with my enjoyment of Yachty's strange, messy and wildly infectious debut studio album Teenage Emotions.

If Yachty intended Teenage Emotions to be a metaphor for the perpetual confusion that defines adolescence, then he pretty much nailed it. Despite having no clear musical direction and enough poorly-mixed AutoTune to fill 12 Brokencyde records, this 21-track behemoth managed to win me over with its disarming charm. Whether Yachty is crooning about lost love behind '80-inspired synthfunk beats ("Bring it Back", "Girl in the Yellow"), throwing his hat into the increasingly crowded tropical pop arena ("Better", "Forever Young") or making club bangers that showcase his poor knowledge of woodwind instruments ("Peek a Boo"), this record manages to be consistently loose, catchy and engaging. Given how many stone-serious, borderline depressing hip-hop releases I've heard over the last few months, it was honestly cathartic to hear something that was as pleasant and beautifully unhinged as Teenage Emotions.  

The ability to make such a scattershot record work without any truly crippling hiccups is a testament to Yachty's immense likability. There's so much organic joy behind what he's doing that it becomes very easy to forgive all of the tonal inconsistencies and questionable production choices that would've otherwise derailed this record. Even the lesser tracks ("Made of Glass", "Moments in Time", "No More") have a strange, radiant quality that prevents them from being serious missteps. As long as Yachty can retain his positive energy and lovable weirdness, I'll continue to have a blast listening to his music. 

It might not be the most cohesive or essential hip-hop release to come out in 2017, but Teenage Emotions injected some much-needed sunshine into a year that has been full of dread, mass hysteria and alarming amounts of hate. While I'm sure that plenty of people will find this record to be an obnoxious disaster that insults the integrity of the hip-hop genre, it put a huge smile on my face for hour and in the world of music, sometimes that's all you need.  

3.5/5 Stars
Standout Tracks
1.Peek a Boo (feat. Migos)
2.Forever Young (feat. Diplo)
3.Priorities

2017 NFL Position Rankings: Top 30 Tackles

30.Eric Fisher (Chiefs)

29.Demar Dotson (Buccaneers)

28.Ryan Schrader (Falcons)

27.Branden Albert (Jaguars) 

26.Alejandro Villanueva (Steelers)

25.Taylor Decker (Lions)

24.Ronnie Stanley (Ravens) 

23.Jake Matthews (Falcons)

22.Marcus Cannon (Patriots) 

21.Ricky Wagner (Lions)

20.Morgan Moses (Redskins)

19.Nate Solder (Patriots)

18.Lane Johnson (Eagles)

17.Jack Conklin (Titans)

16.Zach Strief (Saints)

15.Duane Brown (Texans)

14.Taylor Lewan (Titans)

13.Bryan Bulaga (Packers)

12.Marcus Gilbert (Steelers)

11.Anthony Castonzo (Colts)

10.Joe Staley (49ers)

9.Terron Armstead (Saints)

8.Cordy Glenn (Bills)

7.David Bakhtiari (Packers)

6.Jason Peters (Eagles) 

5.Donald Penn (Raiders)

4.Andrew Whitworth (Rams) 

3.Tyron Smith (Cowboys)
2.Trent Williams (Redskins)
1.Joe Thomas (Browns)

Concert Review: Boston Calling (Day 3)-- Allston, MA-- May 28th, 2017

Lineup: Tool/Weezer/Major Lazer/Cage the Elephant/Run the Jewels/Flatbush Zombies/Converge/The Hotelier/Numerous Others
Venue: Harvard Athletic Complex, Allston, MA
Date: May 27th, 2017

The Hotelier: As someone who hadn't heard a note of their music prior to seeing them live, I can say that the hype The Hotelier has picked up in indie/emo circles over the past few years is completely justified. The emotion that drives every one of their songs reminds me of The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me-era Brand New and vocalist Christian Holden has a really distinct voice that fits the melancholy tone of their music incredibly well. After blindly ignoring the praise for their last two LP's (2014's Home, Like Noplace Is There and 2016' Goodness), this set was all the convincing I needed to finally check out The Hotelier's studio material.

Converge: Mathcore pioneers Converge they didn't let their status as an extreme metal outlier on an indie rock-heavy festival prevent them from wreaking their typical levels of havoc. Despite playing on a massive stage in front of a pretty scarce crowd, this show contained every ounce of the beautiful, unrelenting chaos that defines their headlining shows. Even though this was my third time seeing them, the level of intensity that Converge brings to the stage continues to floor me. They're one of the few acts whose I would describe as a force of nature and that gift for creating pure musical destruction paired with their mind-blowing technical prowess makes them one of my favorite bands to see live.

Flatbush Zombies: Screw trying to be eloquent, Flatbush Zombies are fuckin LIT live. The New York hip-hip trio's 50-minute set was exactly the type of non-stop party I wanted at a big festival like this. The rapping from Meechy Darko, Zombie Juice and Erick the Architect was spot-on, the setlist was full of bangers and perhaps most importantly, they possess the authentic punk-rock aesthetic that so many other rappers right now try to emulate with little-to-no success. I've rambled on and on in the past about how frustratingly erratic live hip-hop performances can be, so it's always great to see an act that doesn't fuck around and puts forth 110% effort the entire time they're on stage. If it wasn't for the crowd's relatively low energy level, this would've been my favorite set of the day.

Run the Jewels: Death, taxes and Run the Jewels kicking all sorts of ass live are life's only guarantees. The dream team of Killer Mike and El-P delivered an hour-long set of hardcore hip-hop perfection and unlike Flatbush Zombies, the crowd matched their energy every step of the way. The near-identical setlist and rehashing of a majority of the stage banter from their headlining tour in February made this the least enjoyable of the four times I've seen them, but RTJ was still dope as hell.

Cage the Elephant: I only watched these guys because I needed to kill some time before Weezer went on, but they ended up being pretty decent. They had some solid bluesy riffs and their singer's Mick Jagger-esque mannerisms were entertaining to watch. I don't envision myself ever becoming a Cage the Elephant fan, but their live show was a perfectly adequate, inoffensive way to spend 45 minutes at a festival.

Weezer: In my eyes, Weezer was the biggest wild card on this entire festival. I've been nothing more than a casual fan of theirs since my teenage years and they've released a grand total of two albums that I've enjoyed (2014's Everything Will Be Alright in the End and 2016's The White Album) since Y2K hit, so I wouldn't have been the least surprised if they ended up not making much of an impression on me. Not only did Weezer not underwhelm, they ended up putting on one of my favorite sets of the day. Their set was essentially a 75-minute journey through the biggest hits of their nearly 30-year career and while you could certainly accuse of them pandering to the festival crowd, it was an exhilarating blast of pure nostalgia. The combination of the band's musical precision and frontman Rivers Cuomo's geeky energy made me feel like I was seeing them on the Blue Album or Pinkerton tour. I'm a moron for doubting Weezer's ability as a live act and I would go see them again without hesitation.


Tool: On a day that was full of excellent performances, a letdown was bound to happen. Unfortunately, that letdown came in the form of Boston Calling's top headliner Tool.

To be fair, the issues that bogged down Tool's set had pretty much nothing to do with the band itself. The combination of the spot I was standing in near the back right of the festival's main stage area (I wasn't willing to skip out on Weezer and Run the Jewels in order to secure a spot near the front) and a wonky PA system made around 90% of Tool's set an auditory nightmare. The first two songs of the set ("The Grudge" and "Parabola") were borderline inaudible and after they turned the sound up to a more reasonable volume prior to the start of "Schism", the guitars and vocals alternated between being super loud and really quiet for the next hour or so. By the time these issues subsided shortly after the start of "Vicarious", the set was pretty much over and the damage had already been done. Tool clearly can't be blamed for problems with the festival's sound system, but those issues with the PA still put an undeniable damper on the quality of their set.

Of course for a band of Tool's caliber, a shitty sound mix wasn't enough to completely derail their performance. Tool is the closest thing the metal community has to a jam band and their live show emphasizes why they are the biggest psychedelic weirdos in heavy music. The parade of inexplicably strange imagery that floods their wall-to-wall video backdrop and vocalist Maynard James Keenan's minimalist, oddball stage presence (he stood in the back of the stage next to the drum riser for the duration of the set) perfectly matches the trippy, instrumental-driven vibe of their music. The restrained, hallucinatory vibe that drives Tool's shows is the complete antithesis of the genre's traditionally high-energy atmosphere and I doubt I'll ever experience anything like it from another metal band as long as I live. 

Tool's musicianship was also unsurprisingly outstanding. Their rhythm section of bassist Justin Chancellor and drummer Danny Carey was among the tightest I've ever seen play live and when I could actually hear him, Keenan's vocals sounded fantastic. I've always admired Tool as musicians, but seeing them pull their material off without any hiccups has sent that respect level into the stratosphere. While it was far from perfect, it was cool to finally get to experience Tool's renowned visual/laser show and superb musicianship in person.

Scores:
The Hotelier 7.5/10
Converge 9.5/10
Flatbush Zombies 9/10
Run the Jewels 9/10
Cage the Elephant 6/10
Weezer 9/10
Tool 8/10

Setlists:
Converge:
Dark Horse
Aimless Arrow
The Broken Vow
Trespasses
All We Love We Leave Behind
Worms Will Feed/Rats Will Feast
Reap What You Sow
Glacial Pace
Eagles Become Vultures
Concubine
Jane Doe

Flatbush Zombies:
The Odyssey
Bounce
New Song
This is It
Trade-Off
New Song
Glorious Thugs
New Phone, Who Dis?
New Song
Bath Salt (A$AP Mob cover)
Palm Trees

Run the Jewels: 
Talk to Me
Legend Has It
Call Ticketron
Blockbuster Night Part 1
Oh My Darling Don't Cry
Nobody Speak (DJ Shadow cover)
Hey Kids (Bumaye)
Stay Gold
Don't Get Captured
Close Your Eyes (And Count to Fuck)
Panther Like a Panther
Lie, Cheat, Steal
A Report to the Shareholders
Down
Run the Jewels


Weezer:
Hash Pipe
My Name is Jonas
Pork and Beans
Feels Like Summer
Memories
Hey Ya! (Outkast cover)
(If You're Wondering If I Want You to) I Want You to
Perfect Situation
Troublemaker
Thank God for Girls
Beverly Hills
Dope Nose/Back to the Shack/Keep Fishin'/The Good Life/Surf Wax America (medley)
Undone-The Sweater Song
Island in the Sun
I Took a Pill in Ibiza (Mike Posner cover)
King of the World
Say it Ain't So
Buddy Holly

Tool:
The Grudge
Parabola
Schism
Opiate
Aenema 
Jambi
Third Eye
Forty Six & 2
Sweat
Vicarious
Stinkfist

The Best and Worst of Zac Efron

The "Best and Worst" series profiles the best and worst work of an actor starring in one of the week's new theatrical releases. This week I take a look at the filmography of "Baywatch" star Zac Efron.

Films starring Zac Efron that I've seen:
New Year's Eve
The Paperboy 
Parkland
That Awkward Moment
Neighbors
We Are Your Friends
Dirty Grandpa
Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising
Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates 

Best Performance: Neighbors (2014)
When I the first trailer for Neighbors came out in October 2013, I was absolutely puzzled by the casting of Efron in a prominent role alongside proven comedy heavyweights Seth Rogen and Rose Byrne. Up to this point in his career, he was merely a former teen heartthrob with a resume that almost solely consisted of subpar performances in mediocre movies (The Paperboy, Parkland, That Awkward Moment). Efron ended up making me eat my words by being the single best part of Neighbors. This scene-stealing performance generated no shortage of huge laughs and went on to help Efron finally find his niche in the world of comedy. 

Worst Performance: New Year's Eve (2011)
After watching New Year's Eve, I was strongly considering permanently writing off Efron as an actor. Efron was a charmless bore every time he appeared on screen and the alarming lack of chemistry he had with his much older love interest (Michelle Pfeiffer) made their scenes together feel super creepy. 

Best Film: Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (2016)
Out of all the great comedies that have come out over the past several years, this is easily one of the most underrated. Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates is essentially just 90 minutes of funny people getting into insane situations and firing off largely-improvised dialogue at each other. The four leads (Adam Devine, Efron, Aubrey Plaza, Anna Kendrick) play off each other incredibly well and the freewheeling vibe allows the laughs to keep coming at a machine gun-clip.

Worst Film: New Year's Eve (2011) 
The late Garry Marshall (Happy Days, Pretty Woman) was a Hollywood legend that consistently produced beloved works over the course of his nearly 60-year career. However, none of his widely-praised comedic and storytelling talent was on display in New Year's Eve. While I didn't hate it as much a lot of professional critics did, it's still an overstuffed, over-the-top sappy ensemble romantic comedy full of characters that are hard to care about.

Thank you for reading this week's installment of "The Best and Worst of". Next week, I'll take a look at the best and worst work of "Wonder Woman" star Chris Pine.  

Concert Review: Future-- Mansfield, MA-- May 23rd, 2017

Lineup: Future/Migos/Tory Lanez/A$AP Ferg/Zoey Dollaz ("Nobody Safe Tour")
Venue: Xfinity Center, Mansfield, MA
Date: May 23rd, 2017

Zoey Dollaz: Arrived late and missed his set.

A$AP Ferg: Arrived late and missed his set.

Tory Lanez: Tory Lanez is an artist that I've been indifferent on since he first garnered attention with his hit single "Say It" back in 2015 and after seeing him live, I feel exactly the same way. Lanez is the type of artist that is easy to tolerate, but really difficult to get excited about. He has an alright singing voice, his rapping is competent and he's half-decent at working a crowd, which makes his shows as aggressively mediocre as his studio material.

Migos: What a difference year makes. Last March, I saw Migos headline at a dingy 575-capacity club just outside of Boston. Last night, they were the direct support act at a sold-out amphitheater show. It was honestly surreal to see 20,000 people collectively lose their minds for Migos a mere 14 months after I saw them play in one of the most intimate venues in Massachusetts. As a longtime fan of Migos, it's amazing to see them finally achieve massive success after spending years grinding it out on the club circuit. Some sound issues with Quavo's mic and the often overpowering backing tracks made this performance not quite as good as the last time I saw them, but it was still a super fun performance that showcased the charisma, energy and underrated technical chops that has led to their overdue explosion in popularity.

Future: Like pretty much every other trap artist I've never seen before, I had absolutely no idea what to expect from Future's live show. My opinion on his projects have been all over the map and given the level of success he's enjoyed since Monster dropped in October 2014, I wouldn't have been the least surprised if he put minimal effort into his performance. Thankfully, this didn't ended up being the case as Future eviscerated my skepticism by putting on a very entertaining show. 

Although his rapping isn't flawless and he often cuts his songs way too short (the last four songs of the set were the only ones he played all the way through), Future is such a natural, exciting performer that you can easily forgive these issues. Outside of Kanye West, he's the only rapper I've whose shows translates well to a huge stage. His massive stage presence and constant energy allows him to make a mostly-seated amphitheater feel like a wild club atmosphere. The setlist almost exclusively consisted of fan-favorite tracks that generated a huge reaction and his obligatory "make some noise, Boston how we doing tonight, etc." crowdwork was some of the most effective I've ever seen. He might not be most the ambitious or consistent rapper on the planet, but his boatloads of charisma and infectious joy for what he does makes him one of modern hip-hop's only undeniable superstars. While it's highly unlikely to go down as one of my favorite performances of 2017, Future put on a fun-ass show that left me with a huge smile on my face.

Scores:
Tory Lanez 5/10
Migos 8/10
Future 8/10

Setlists:
Migos:
Get Right Witcha
Slippery
What the Price
Deadz
Kelly Price
Cocoon/Hannah Montana (choruses only)
Fight Night
Call Casting
T-Shirt
Bad and Boujee
Handsome and Wealthy
Pipe It Up

Future:
Draco
Rent Money
Super Trapper
Chosen One
Karate Chop
Itchin'
Bugatti (Ace Hood cover)
Same Damn Time
Move That Dope
Sh!t
Thought It Was a Drought
Freak Hoe
Real Sisters
Love Me (Lil Wayne cover)
Trap Niggas
Stick Talk
Groupies
Blase (Ty Dolla $ign cover)
New Level (A$AP Ferg cover) (w/A$AP Ferg)
Jumpman
Incredible
I'm So Groovy
Comin Out Strong
Good Dope
My Savages
Wicked
I Serve the Base
Peacoat
Used to This
Low Life
Fuck Up Some Commas
March Madness
Mask Off

2017 NFL Position Rankings: Top 20 Tight Ends

20.Zach Miller (Bears)
19.Charles Clay (Bills)
18.Eric Ebron (Lions)
17.Hunter Henry (Chargers)

16.Jack Doyle (Colts)

15.Cameron Brate (Buccaneers) 

14.Dennis Pitta (Ravens) 

13.Jason Witten (Cowboys)

12.Antonio Gates (Chargers)

11.Coby Fleener (Saints)

10.Kyle Rudolph (Vikings)

9.Zach Ertz (Eagles)

8.Tyler Eifert (Bengals)

7.Martellus Bennett (Packers)

6.Delanie Walker (Titans)

5.Jimmy Graham (Seahawks)

4.Jordan Reed (Redskins)

3.Greg Olsen (Panthers)

2.Travis Kelce (Chiefs)

1.Rob Gronkowski (Patriots)

2017 NFL Position Rankings: Top 50 Wide Receivers

50.Mohamed Sanu (Falcons)
49.Cameron Meredith (Bears)
48.Adam Thielen (Vikings) 
47.Kenny Britt (Browns)
46.Randall Cobb (Packers)
45.Cole Beasley (Cowboys) 
44.Tyreek Hill (Chiefs)
43.Terrelle Pryor (Redskins) 
42.Jamison Crowder (Redskins)

41.Tyrell Williams (Chargers)

40.Kenny Stills (Dolphins)
39.Willie Snead (Saints)

38.Stefon Diggs (Vikings)
37.Jordan Matthews (Eagles)

36.John Brown (Cardinals)

35.Allen Hurns (Jaguars)

34.Davante Adams (Packers)

33.Mike Wallace (Ravens)

32.Rishard Matthews (Titans)

31.Michael Thomas (Saints)
30.Pierre Garcon (49ers)
29.Kelvin Benjamin (Panthers)
28.Eric Decker (Jets) 
27.Jeremy Maclin (Chiefs)
26.Marvin Jones (Lions)
25.DeSean Jackson (Buccaneers)
24.Keenan Allen (Chargers)

23.Sammy Watkins (Bills)

22.Golden Tate (Lions)

21.Michael Crabtree (Raiders)

20.Julian Edelman (Patriots)

19.Brandin Cooks (Patriots)

18.Allen Robinson (Jaguars)
17.Emmanuel Sanders (Broncos)

16.Alshon Jeffrey (Eagles)

15.Brandon Marshall (Giants)

14.Jarvis Landry (Dolphins)

13.Doug Baldwin (Seahawks)

12.Amari Cooper (Raiders)

11.Demaryius Thomas (Broncos)

10.Larry Fitzgerald (Cardinals)

9.Jordy Nelson (Packers)

8.DeAndre Hopkins (Texans)

7.T.Y. Hilton (Colts)

6.Mike Evans (Buccaneers)
5.Dez Bryant (Cowboys)
4.A.J. Green (Bengals)
3.Odell Beckham Jr. (Giants)
2.Julio Jones (Falcons)
1.Antonio Brown (Steelers)

Concert Review: Metallica-- Foxboro, MA-- May 19th, 2017

Lineup: Metallica/Volbeat/Local H
Venue: Gillette Stadium, Foxboro, MA
Date: May 19th, 2017

Local H: Arrived late and missed their set.

Volbeat: By the time I got to my seats, Volbeat had just broke into "16 Dollars" from their 2010 breakout album Beyond Hell/Above Heaven. While I was initially a little bit disappointed that I didn't get into Gillette Stadium in time for the start of their set, this late arrival proved to be a blessing in disguise. The sound mix was so muddy that you couldn't make out anything aside from the guitar and a handful of vocal lines, which made it really difficult to get into/properly assess the quality of their set. Even though I'm pretty indifferent towards Volbeat's recent output, I'd like to see them again in an environment where I can clearly hear what they're playing.

Metallica: I've been fortunate enough to catch a vast majority of my favorite bands live and for the most part, these performances have resulted in some of the most treasured memories I've accumulated in my 25 years of life to-date. Thrash metal legends Metallica were pretty much the only band of my top-tier favorites that I hadn't gotten the chance to see yet, which isn't exactly surprising given the fact they've played Massachusetts a grand total of once (January 2009 on the Death Magnetic tour) since I started going to shows 12 years ago. Friday night, I finally caught my white whale and for the most part, it lived up to my immense expectations.

It became clear within the first few minutes of Metallica taking the stage that this wasn't going to be an ordinary metal show experience. They have a larger-than-life rockstar swagger that you very rarely see in a genre that's primarily driven by intimate shows and subdued personalities. Everything from their sprawling stage setup to frontman James Hetfield's exuberant stage presence is much more reminiscent of an arena rock band like Van Halen or Kiss than Black Sabbath or Iron Maiden. Metallica is the undisputed most popular metal band of all-time and it's great to see them embrace their long run of absurd success with a properly excessive live show.  

While the flashy showmanship definitely plays a crucial role in their set, Metallica's live show isn't merely a empty, gimmicky spectacle. The quality of the musicianship is every bit good as the elaborate stage production. The older material has every ounce of ferocity that made the studio versions groundbreaking classics while the newer material retains all of the hard rock flash and sing-along hooks that allowed them to become the first metal band to ever resonate with mainstream audiences. Metallica has aged with a tremendous level of grace and it helped make this performance a treat for fans of any era of their music.
         
As impressive as Metallica was, the overwhelming shitiness of Gillette Stadium prevented it from being an all-time great performance. Football stadiums clearly aren't built for acoustics, but the sound quality at Gillette managed to fall far below my very low expectations. The wind tunnel-esque design of the stadium made it sound like they were playing in the next city over and led to every single instrument/mic cutting out at various points of the set. As an obsessive metalhead who's been waiting 12 agonizing years to see Metallica live, nothing quite crushes your soul like having the solo of "Master of Puppets" and pretty much the entirety of "For Whom the Bell Tolls" get ruined by shoddy-ass sound. How people gleefully shell out $100+ to go see Kenny Chesney, Luke Bryan and the half-dozen other pop-country jabronis that play at this coffin every summer is legitimately astonishing to me.

Despite my issues with the venue and some of the setlist choices (playing five tracks from The Black Album while only playing a combined two songs from Master of Puppets and ...And Justice for All is blasphemous), it was still awesome to finally cross Metallica off my bucket list and experience some of my all-time favorite songs ("Fight Fire with Fire", "One", "Fade to Black") in a live setting. Hopefully the next time Metallica rolls through Massachusetts, they won't book a show at Robert Kraft's poop palace.

Scores:
Volbeat 6.5/10
Metallica 8.5/10

Setlists:
Volbeat (last 6 songs):
16 Dollars
The Hangman's Body Count
Hallelujah Goat
Lola Montez
Dead but Rising
Still Counting

Metallica:
Hardwired
Atlas, Rise!
For Whom the Bell Tolls
Fuel
The Unforgiven
Now That We're Dead
Moth Into Flame
Wherever I May Roam
Halo on Fire
Motorbreath
Sad but True
One
Master of Puppets
Fade to Black
Seek & Destroy

Encore:
Fight Fire with Fire
Nothing Else Matters
Enter Sandman

2017 NFL Position Rankings: Top 50 Running Backs

50.C.J Prosise (Seahawks)

49.Shane Vereen (Giants)

48.Duke Johnson Jr. (Browns)
47.Jacquizz Rodgers (Buccaneers)

46.Terrance West (Ravens)
45.Alfred Morris (Cowboys)
44.Chris Ivory (Jaguars)
43.Thomas Rawls (Seahawks)
42.Derrick Henry (Titans)
41.DeAngelo Williams (Free Agent)
40.Mike Gillislee (Patriots)
39.Rob Kelley (Redskins)

38.Eddie Lacy (Seahawks)
37.Danny Woodhead (Ravens)
36.Darren Sproles (Eagles)
35.Ty Montgomery (Packers)
34.Dion Lewis (Patriots)
33.Carlos Hyde (49ers)
32.Charles Sims (Buccaneers)
31.James White (Patriots)
30.Theo Riddick (Lions)
29.Giovani Bernard (Bengals)
28.Bilal Powell (Jets)
27.Ryan Matthews (Eagles)

26.Doug Martin (Buccaneers)
25.Matt Forte (Jets)
24,Jonathan Stewart (Panthers)
23.Marshawn Lynch (Raiders)
22.Jammal Charles (Broncos)
21.Tevin Coleman (Falcons)
20.Jeremy Hill (Bengals)
19.Isaiah Crowell (Browns)
18.LeGarrette Blount (Eagles)
17.Spencer Ware (Chiefs)
16.C.J. Anderson (Broncos)
15.Latavius Murray (Vikings)

14.Melvin Gordon (Chargers)

13.Adrian Peterson (Saints)
12.Lamar Miller (Texans)
11.Mark Ingram (Saints) 
10.Frank Gore (Colts)
9.Jordan Howard (Bears) 

8.Todd Gurley (Rams)

7.Jay Ajayi (Dolphins)
6.DeMarco Murray (Titans)
5.Devonta Freeman (Falcons)
4.Ezekiel Elliott (Cowboys)
3.LeSean McCoy (Bills)
2.David Johnson (Cardinals)
1.Le'Veon Bell (Steelers)

Album Review: Paramore-After Laughter

The first five months of the 2017 musical year has mimicked the unpredictability and insanity of the real world. Calvin Harris has suddenly morphed into R&B's most reliable, innovative hitmaker. Kendrick Lamar proved his mortality by releasing a generic album. Justin Bieber landed a prominent  guest spot on a hit Spanish-language pop song. If you had told me any of this wild shit was going to happen six months ago, I would've assumed you were a methhead with a rich imagination. Paramore is the latest act to throw a curveball in this chaotic year by ditching their angst-filled brand of power pop/punk for 80's-inspired new wave and while there are some notable bumps along the way, it's an unexpected change in direction that mostly works.

What Carley Rae Jepsen was able to do with vintage synthpop on Emotion, Paramore does for new wave with After Laughter. This record is a passionate revival of a long-dead musical movement that pays tribute to the genre's pioneers without ever sounding like a direct rip-off. The palatable love and respect Paramore has for the new wave/alternative dance scene goes a long way in helping this pretty drastic shift in musical direction go as smoothly as possible.

Any doubt of Paramore's ability to embrace their inner Duran Duran is quickly shattered with the triumphant trio of tracks ("Hard Times", "Rose-Colored Boy", "Told You So")  that kicks off After Laughter. The massive, goofy synths and bouncy guitarwork serve as PED's for Haley Williams' bubbly vocals, and help create a vibe that is so irresistibly upbeat that even a soulless, 80's-hating prick like myself couldn't help but smile. The rest of the record mostly fails to match the magic of the opening tracks, but tracks like "Caught in the Middle" and "Idle Worship" still manage to produce the type of sugary earworms that burrow into your brain for weeks at a time. Fans of the more melancholy material found on their beloved 2009 album Brand New Eyes might be disappointed with this record's over-the-top embrace of all things warm and vibrant, but I really appreciated this record's unrelenting positive energy and authentic vintage sound.    

As good as the uptempo songs are, After Laughter loses its way when it heads into obligatory ballad territory. The slow songs consistently arrive at inopportune times and successful kill the momentum built up by their breezier counterparts. "Forgiveness" throws water all over the aforementioned three-track party that opens the record while the even duller "26" and "Pool" act as tire-popping speed bumps in the middle of the record. Not even Williams' consistently serviceable vocal performances can save these cluster of tracks from being tone-killing duds. Paramore has crafted some excellent slower tunes in the past ("Decode", "Part II"), but the ones on After Laughter are consistently forgettable and wildly out-of-place given the brisk tone of the rest of the record.

After Laughter is a well-crafted, engaging return to form for Paramore following their middling 2013 self-titled record. Given the lack of memorable hooks and melodies that plagued their last record, I fully expected the 2010 departure of founding guitarist/primary songwriter Josh Farro to be a crippling blow that the band wouldn't be able to recover from, but this record proves that Williams and longtime guitarist Taylor York are risk-takers that have the creative juice to keep this band afloat for years to come. While the flat ballads and my sketchy relationship with the new wave genre prevented me from loving this record, After Laughter is a fun, creative 42-minutes of music that I respect the hell out of.

3/5 Stars
Standout Tracks
1.Rose-Colored Boy
2.Hard Times
3.Caught in the Middle

2017 NBA Mock Draft 1.0

After months of predicting the different lottery scenarios, the ping-pong balls were finally drawn last night in New York City and in a not-so surprising twist, the Boston Celtics came away with the #1 overall pick. With the draft order now established, I proudly present my 1st mock of the season. I will fully admit that my level of research and tape study for this paled in comparison to what I do for the NFL Draft every year, but as a blogger and basketball fan, I figured I was obligated to throw my hat in the mindless pre-draft speculation ring. Make sure you check back on June 23rd to see just how wrong I was.

1.Boston Celtics: Markelle Fultz, point/shooting guard (Washington)
2.Los Angeles Lakers: Lonzo Ball, point guard (UCLA)
3.Philadelphia 76ers: De'Aaron Fox, point guard (Kentucky)
4.Phoenix Suns: Josh Jackson, small forward (Kansas)
5.Sacramento Kings: Jayson Tatum, small/power forward (Duke)
6.Orlando Magic: Malik Monk, shooting guard (Kentucky)
7.Minnesota Timberwolves: Jonathan Issac, small/power forward (Florida State)
8.New York Knicks: Dennis Smith Jr., point guard (NC State)
9.Dallas Mavericks: Frank Ntilikina, point/shooting guard (France)
10.Sacramento Kings: Zach Collins, center (Gonzaga)
11.Charlotte Hornets: Jarrett Allen, center (Texas)
12.Detroit Pistons: Justin Jackson, small forward (North Carolina)
13.Denver Nuggets: Hamidou Diallo, shooting guard (Kentucky)
14.Miami Heat: Lauri Markkanen, power forward (Arizona)
15.Portland Trail Blazers: John Collins, power forward (Wake Forest)
16.Chicago Bulls: Justin Patton, center (Creighton)
17.Milwaukee Bucks: Donovan Mitchell, shooting guard (Louisville)
18.Indiana Pacers: TJ Leaf, power forward (UCLA)
19.Atlanta Hawks: OG Anunoby, small forward (Indiana)
20.Portland Trail Blazers: Terrance Ferguson, shooting guard/small forward (Australia)
21.Oklahoma City Thunder: Luke Kennard, shooting guard (Duke)
22.Brooklyn Nets: Harry Giles III, power forward (Duke)
23.Toronto Raptors: Ike Anigbogu, center (UCLA)
24.Utah Jazz: Derek White, shooting guard (Colorado)
25.Orlando Magic: Isaiah Hartenstein, power forward/center (Germany)
26.Portland Trail Blazers: Rodions Kurucs, small forward (Latvia)
27.Brooklyn Nets: Frank Jackson, point/shooting guard (Duke)
28.Los Angeles Lakers: Jordan Bell, power forward/center (Oregon)
29.San Antonio Spurs: Johnathan Motley, power forward (Baylor)
30.Utah Jazz: Bam Adebayo, center (Kentucky)

2017 NFL Position Rankings: Top 25 Quarterbacks

Ladies and gentleman, the most wonderful time of the year has finally arrived. To distract myself and the other diehard fans out there from the fact that the start of the regular season is still nearly four months away, I'll be rolling out my picks for the best players in the NFL heading into the 2017 season with my fifth annual Position Ranking Series. The series will be released in individual posts over the course of the next month and will cover every position on offense, defense and special teams. Feel feel to post any praise or disdain you have for my picks in the comment section below or tweet them to me at @cmaitlandmm. Hope you enjoy!

 

Notes/Rules for the Position Ranking Series (copy/pasted from last year):

1.Rookies are excluded from these rankings

2.Each player is judged on where they currently stand in my opinion, not the player they once were, are going to be, etc.

3.Each player is listed as member of the team they will play for in 2017, not who they played for in 2016.

25.Carson Wentz (Eagles)
24.Blake Bortles (Jaguars)
23.Sam Bradford (Vikings)
22.Carson Palmer (Cardinals)
21.Tyrod Taylor (Bills)
20.Dak Prescott (Cowboys)
19.Marcus Mariota (Titans)
18.Ryan Tannehill (Dolphins)
17.Alex Smith (Chiefs) 
16.Joe Flacco (Ravens)
15.Andy Dalton (Bengals)
14.Jameis Winston (Buccaneers)
13.Philip Rivers (Chargers)
12.Kirk Cousins (Redskins)
11.Eli Manning (Giants)
10.Derek Carr (Raiders)
9.Matthew Stafford (Lions)
8.Cam Newton (Panthers)
7.Matt Ryan (Falcons) 
6.Andrew Luck (Colts)
5.Ben Roethlisberger (Steelers)
4.Russell Wilson (Seahawks)
3.Drew Brees (Saints)
2.Aaron Rodgers (Packers)
1.Tom Brady (Patriots)

The Best and Worst of Danny McBride

The "Best and Worst" series profiles the best and worst work of an actor starring in one of the week's new theatrical releases. This week I take a look at the filmography of "Alien: Covenant" star Danny McBride.

Films starring Danny McBride that I've seen:
Hot Rod
The Heartbreak Kid 
Drillbit Taylor
The Foot Fist Way
Pineapple Express
Tropic Thunder
Land of the Lost
Up in the Air
Despicable Me
Due Date
Your Highness
Kung Fu Panda 2
30 Minutes or Less
This is the End 
As I Lay Dying
Aloha
Rock the Kasbah
Sausage Party

Best Performance: This is the End (2013)
In a film that was led by elite comic actors (Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, Craig Robinson, James Franco, Jay Baruchel), McBride managed to stand out as the MVP. His turn as the "villain" in this brilliant "self-absorbed celebrities vs. the apocalypse" comedy is a masterclass in the art of scene-stealing. McBride's biting delivery and willingness to go to extreme distances to obtain a laugh allows him to run away with one of the most consistently hilarious films of the past decade.    

Worst Performance: Aloha (2015)
McBride was one of the many talented actors that got caught in the wreckage of the shocking trainwreck that was Cameron Crowe's Aloha. Even though he plays a character (a hot-headed, hard-partying Air Force colonel) that is well within his wheelhouse as a performer, Crowe's corny clusterfuck of a script buries McBride's gift for delivering effortlessly rage-filled laughs.

Best Film: Hot Rod (2007)
The first major-studio film McBride ever appeared in also happens to be his best. The Lonely Island's Hot Rod is an unrelentingly strange, clever and highly rewatchable piece of absurdist comedy gold that has only gotten better with age.

Worst Film: As I Lay Dying (2013)
James Franco's fearlessness in selecting projects is a large part of why he's one of the most interesting actors in Hollywood right now. However, that willingness to experiment with so many different genres and filmmaking styles occasionally results in epic misfires like the big-screen adaptation of William Faulkner's beloved novel As I Lay Dying. Behind constant split-screens and exposition-filled voiceovers, Franco-who also wrote and directed the film-turns this iconic story about death and the many ways people react to it into a pretentious, disjointed snoozefest that is legitimately painful to sit through.   

Thank you for reading this week's installment of "The Best and Worst of". Next week, I'll take a look at the best and worst work of "Baywatch" star Zac Efron. 

Concert Review: Coheed & Cambria-- Boston, MA-- May 9th, 2017

Lineup: Coheed and Cambria/The Dear Hunter (Neverender: Good Apollo I'm Burning Star IV: From Fear Through the Eyes of Madness)
Venue: Blue Hills Bank Pavilion, Boston, MA
Date: May 9th, 2017

The Dear Hunter: My first exposure to The Dear Hunter came back in 2012 when they opened for Coheed and Cambria on The Afterman: Ascension tour, so it's only fitting that another set supporting Coheed brought them back onto to my radar. In keeping with the tradition of history repeating itself, I once again came away from The Dear Hunter's set in awe of their musicianship and the massive scope of their sound. With their largely experimental song structures, minimalist stage presence and constant instrumental breaks, The Dear Hunter are the type of super talented, legit prog weirdos that deserve every ounce of over-the-top praise they receive. This performance is the kick in the ass I needed to finally dive into their widely-beloved discography. 

Coheed & Cambria: Every music enthusiast on the planet can point to a small number of albums that truly changed their lives. Coheed and Cambria's Good Apollo I'm Burning Star IV: From Fear Through the Eyes of Madness was one of those records for me. This record arrived at a time in my life where I was just starting to really get into music and as a 13-year old kid who had never heard anything like this before, it helped me foster an appreciation for concept albums, dramatic tempo shifts and massive, goofy guitar riffs that has stuck with me to this day.

When Coheed and Cambria announced in January that they were going to be playing From Fear Through the Eyes of Madness in its entirety on a tour this spring, I was instantly overwhelmed with joy. I had speculated that it was going to happen at some point in time since they have a history of playing full albums live (they played 2002's The Second Stage Turbine Blade and 2003's In Keeping Secrets of Silent Earth: 3 on North American tours in spring 2012 and fall 2014 respectively), but I was still blown away that a long-standing dream of mine was actually becoming a reality. Of course since I'm a paranoid, cynical lunatic, I was petrified that this show wasn't going to live up the ridiculous expectations I had in my head. Given how long I've been waiting to hear this album in a live setting, a less-than-stellar performance would've crushed my feeble little soul. Thankfully, this proved to be one of the rare times where an event managed to live up to the unrealistic expectations I placed upon it.

No amount of fangirl hyperbole can accurately describe how flawless this performance was for me. As soon as the lights dimmed and the "Keeping the Blade" string intro came on over the PA, a feeling of pure euphoria came over me and didn't waver in the slightest for the next 80 minutes. I screamed the words to every song as loud as I possibly could and jammed out like a total idiot, and every moment of it was fucking beautiful. To pick an individual highlight would be really difficult, but finally getting to experience deep cuts like "The Lying Lies & Dirty Secrets of Miss Erica Court", "Crossing the Frame" and "The Willing Well Parts I-III" live was unbelievably badass. While Coheed and Cambria was excellent the previous four times I saw them, this performance was some unreal, next-level shit that ranks among the best individual shows I've ever seen.

Nights like this is why I spend so much of my time and money going to concerts. In my eyes, hearing an album that you love in a room full of people that share your passion for that artists music is one of the greatest experiences a human being could possibly have. Thank you Coheed and Cambria for putting out this incredible piece of music and rewarding your fanbase by playing it from start to finish in a live setting with remarkable precision over a decade after it was released.

Stray Observations:
-I will never get tired of watching Claudio Sanchez dick around with his 12-string guitar during the solo of "Welcome Home". While it's definitely gimmicky, I will never not love watching a guitarist play behind their head for an extended period of time.
-Drummer Josh Eppard looks like one happy bastard. Dude legitimately had a goofy, ear-to-ear grin on his face for the entirety of their nearly 2-hour set.
-During the encore, Sanchez stated that the guys from Mastodon gave the entire band a nasty cold at the beginning of the tour that they had just gotten over this past weekend, so naturally some guy in my section screamed "Fuck Mastodon" as a response. After enduring the laziness of Once More 'Round the Sun and Emperor of Sand, I echo this man's sentiments and plan on blaming all my future illnesses on those formerly brilliant bastards.  
-While the Blue Hills Bank Pavilion is a great, relatively intimate venue with excellent acoustics, it has the misfortune of being an outdoor venue that is located about 50 feet away from the heart of Boston Harbor. Whoever decided it was a good idea to book a show DIRECTLY ON THE WATER in mid-May is a cruel asshole that is blissfully unaware of the climate in Massachusetts. It doesn't get warm in this bitch until Memorial Day Weekend at the earliest, so you shouldn't start booking shows at a waterfront venue until at least early June.  

Scores:
The Dear Hunter 7.5/10
Coheed and Cambria 10/10

Setlist:

Coheed and Cambria:
Keeping the Blade (over the PA)
Always & Never
Welcome Home
Ten Speed (Of God's Blood & Burial)
Crossing the Frame
Apollo I: The Writing Writer
Once Upon Your Dead Body
Wake Up
The Suffering
The Lying Lies & Dirty Secrets of Miss Erica Court
Mother May I
The Willing Well I: Fuel for the Feeding End
The Willing Well II: From Fear Through the Eyes of Madness
The Willing Well III: Apollo II:The Telling Truth
The Willing Well IV: The Final Cut

Encore:
Island
Delirium Trigger
In Keeping Secrets of Silent Earth: 3

The Best and Worst of Jude Law

The "Best and Worst" series profiles the best and worst work of an actor starring in one of the week's new theatrical releases. This week I take a look at the filmography of "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword" star Jude Law.

Films starring Jude Law that I've seen:
Road to Perdition
I Heart Huckabees
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow 
The Aviator 
Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events
Sherlock Holmes
Repo Men
Contagion
Hugo
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
Side Effects
The Grand Budapest Hotel
Dom Hemingway
Spy 

Best Performance: Dom Hemingway (2014)
When it comes to the most underappreciated performances of the 2010's, this one tops my list. Law's electric, hysterical performance as a cocky safecracker trying to collect the money his former boss owes him (Demian Bichir) after his 12-year stint in prison made Dom Hemingway one of the most spellbinding films of 2014.

Worst Performance: Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (2004)
This is the rare piece of acting that is so dull that I honestly forgot Law was in the movie, which is really bad considering that he plays the MAIN CHARACTER. In a film that's stuffed to the brim with gratuitous overacting, Law's stoneface robot routine is out of place and thoroughly painful to watch.

Best Film: Dom Hemingway (2014)
Projects like Dom Hemingway that come out of nowhere and impress the hell out of you are the best kind of surprises the movie industry offers up. A dark comedy about a wise-cracking British safecracker headlined by an actor that I'm pretty indifferent towards didn't really sell me on paper, but Richard Shepard's clever script, Law's knockout performance and the surprising amount of sweetness  in the final act caused me to fall in love with this film. A truly underrated gem and one of the best films of the excellent cinematic year that was 2014. 

Worst Film: Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (2004)
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow is one of those movies that can only be described as a noble missed opportunity. It had a top-notch cast (Law, Gwenyth Paltrow, Angelina Jolie, Giovanni Ribisi), an original premise and groundbreaking visual effects, but its incoherent script and overly serious tone ended up overshadowing the tremendous amount of creativity writer/director Kerry Conran brought to this film. 

Thank you for reading this week's installment of "The Best and Worst of". Next week, I'll take a look at the best and worst work of "Alien: Covenant" star Danny McBride.  

Movie Review: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2

The largely risk-averse, money-printing machine that is Marvel Studios took an unexpected walk on the wild side with 2014's Guardians of the Galaxy. Adapting a relatively obscure property centered around a group of eccentric protagonists with criminal backgrounds is a ballsy move for a studio that specializes in palatable, formulaic entertainment for the masses. The film's twisted, zany approach to the superhero genre ended up striking a chord with audiences, as Guardians went on to become the highest-grossing non-Avengers movie in the history of the MCU ($333.1 mil domestically, $773.3 mil worldwide). After three years of heavy anticipation, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 has finally arrived and for better or worse, it's pretty much exactly what you'd expect a sequel to the beloved global phenomenon to be like.  

Guardians of the Galaxy's surprise breakout success can be attributed to its immensely likable protagonists and warped sense of humor. In a not-so-surprising development, those same ingredients are what make Vol.2 so enjoyable. Writer/director James Gunn tackles the material with the same giddy, depraved glee that be brought to the first installment, and Star-Lord (Chris Pratt), Gamora (Zoe Saldana), Rocket (voice of Bradley Cooper) and Drax (Dave Bautista) are as colorful, snarky and dysfunctional as ever. They'll probably be a point down the line where all of the friendly bickering/insults, lightning-paced fight scenes and random 80's pop culture references will get stale, but for now, the Guardians wacky camaraderie is still a ton of fun to watch.   

When Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 strays away from playing the hits, it runs into a bit of trouble. As you could probably deduce by the heavily-marketed plot point of Star-Lord being reunited with his long-lost father (a perfectly-cast Kurt Russell), this film spends a lot of time exploring the meaning of family. While this attempt to add an emotional backbone to this breezy franchise is certainly noble, it ends up adding a whole lot of unnecessary, faux-sentimental bullshit to the proceedings.

As talented and distinct of a filmmaker as Gunn is, he has no grasp on how to write or direct emotional moments without having them feel ridiculously forced. Every single monologue about familial bonds is so overblown and melodramatic that it feels like something out of a Nicolas Sparks book. Not only are these monologues laughably heavy-handed, but they are ridiculously out-of-place in a film that's as goofy as this. Placing weepy exchanges involving just about every character that isn't a catchphrase-spouting tree in-between jokes about Knight Rider and the size of Drax's poop makes for some jarring tonal shifts that take away from the cohesiveness of the final product.  

With all the hype surrounding it and Marvel's sketchy track record with sequels, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is pretty much a best-case scenario for the comic book giant. While it certainly has more narrative flaws and generally feels less unique than its predecessor, it's still a rollicking, amusing ride that should satisfy the droves of people that loved the original. The "if it ain't broke don't fix it" model may not be the most interesting filmmaking approach in the world, but for crowd-pleasing fare like this, it works just fine.   

4/5 Stars

As We Proceed Episode #9

On this month's "As We Proceed", Feliciano and I are joined by Empty Essex to review Kendrick Lamar's new record DAMN. I also deliver a guide to proper concert etiquette and gratuitously roast Kodak Black for no reason at all. This latest slice of hip-hop podcasting magic and Empty Essex's new EP Groveland can be found here:

Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/asweproceedpodcast/omg-they-killed-kenny-with-special-guests-empty-essex
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/as-we-proceed/id1122163104?mt=2
Groveland by Empty Essex: https://emptyessex.bandcamp.com/album/groveland

10 Most Anticipated Albums of Summer 2017

10.Mutoid Man-War Moans (Release Date: June 2nd)
9.Royal Blood-How Did We Get So Dark? (Release Date: June 16th)
8.The Story So Far-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
7.Goatwhore-Vengeful Ascension (Release Date: June 23rd)
6.Vince Staples-Big Fish Theory (Release Date: TBD)
5.Dying Fetus-Wrong One to Fuck With (Release Date: June 23rd)
4.Lana Del Rey-Lust for Life (Release Date: TBD May/June)
3.Entheos-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
2.The Faceless-In Becoming a Ghost (Release Date: TBD August)
1.August Burns Red-TBD (Release Date: TBD July/August)

Also looking forward to:
At the Drive-In-in. ter.a.li.a (Release Date: May 5th)
Brother Ali-All the Beauty in This Whole Life (Release Date: May 5th)
Slaughter to Prevail-Misery Sermon (Release Date: May 5th)
Scale the Summit-In a World of Fear (Release Date: May 19th) 
Lil Yachty-Teenage Emotions (Release Date: May 26th)
Bleachers-Gone Now (Release Date: June 2nd)
Dan Auerbach-Waiting on a Song (Release Date: June 2nd)
Elder-Reflections of a Floating World (Release Date: June 2nd)
Halsey-Hopeless Fountain Kingdom (Release Date: June 2nd)
Miss May I-Shadows Inside (Release Date: June 2nd) 
Vallenfyre-Fear Those Who Fear Him (Release Date: June 2nd)
Suffocation-... Of the Dark Light (Release Date: June 9th)
CHON-Homey (Release Date: June 16th)
Hundredth-Rare (Release Date: June 16th)
Lorde-Melodrama (Release Date: June 16th)
Municipal Waste-Slime and Punishment (Release Date: June 23rd)
Decapitated-Anticult (Release Date: July 7th)
River Black-River Black (Release Date: July 7th)
Queens of the Stone Age-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Thy Art is Murder-TBD (Release Date: TBD)

The Best and Worst of Zoe Saldana

The "Best and Worst" series profiles the best and worst work of an actor starring in one of the week's new theatrical releases. This week I take a look at the filmography of "Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2" star Zoe Saldana.

Films starring Zoe Saldana that I've seen:
Drumline
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
Guess Who
Vantage Point
Star Trek
Avatar
Death at a Funeral
The Losers
Takers
Colombiana 
The Words
Star Trek Into Darkness
Out of the Furnace
Guardians of the Galaxy
Infinitely Polar Bear
Star Trek Beyond
Live by Night

Best Performance: Infinitely Polar Bear (2015)
Saldana-who is mostly known for being an action/sci-fi star-has had some issues transitioning over to the world of dramatic films in the past (Out of the Furnace, Drumline), but those problems were nowhere to be found in Infinitely Polar Bear. Despite working with a formulaic melodramatic script, Saldana manages to turn in a sensitive, authentic performance as a poverty-stricken Boston woman who leaves her two young daughters (Imogene Wolodarsky and Ashley Aufderheide) in the care of her bipolar husband (Mark Ruffalo, equally great) to pursue a business degree in New York City.  

Worst Performance: Takers (2010)
My problem with Saldana's role in Takers lies squarely on the shoulders of the filmmakers. Given her established background as an ass-kicking action hero, reducing Saldana to a helpless love interest that sits on the sidelines while her fiance (Michael Ealy) and his bank-robbing friends (led by Idris Elba and the late Paul Walker) is dumb, unconvincing and borderline offensive. The egregious miscasting of Saldana is easily the weakest part of an otherwise fun and well-crafted B-heist movie.

Best Film: Star Trek (2009)
Star Trek is the biggest pleasant surprise I've ever experienced as a moviegoer. J.J Abrams did the impossible by taking a brand that was defined by its relentless, grating cheesiness and turning it into a truly epic, absurdly fun modern sci-fi classic. While the 2013 sequel Into Darkness failed to live up to the lofty standards he set here, I'll never forget the spellbinding magic of the original reboot. 

Worst Film: Avatar (2009)
Even as I sit here seven and a half years after it was released, I legitimately can not manage to wrap my around how Avatar managed to pickup a Best Picture nomination and get hailed as one of the greatest movies ever made by millions of people around the world. No amount of innovative visuals can save this film from being a corny, horribly-acted and overwhelmingly dull piece of trash. I genuinely hope the 62 planned sequels James Cameron has spent the last eight years working on never see the light of day.

Thank you for reading this week's installment of "The Best and Worst of". Next week, I'll take a look at the best and worst work of "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword" star Jude Law.  

10 Most Anticipated Films of Summer 2017

A few months back, I trashed the hell of this summer's movie slate. Outside of a few event films, nothing really stood out to me and I feared that 2017 would end up being yet another thoroughly underwhelming summer for Hollywood.  But when I broke down the schedule in-depth in preparation for this piece, I realized that there are actually a ton of potential gems of both the blockbuster and indie variety set for release from May through August. While there is obviously a decent shot that a lot of these titles end up being letdowns, I'm optimistic that this group of films will be able to build upon the surprisingly excellent start to the cinematic year. Here are the 10 films I'm most excited to check out over the next four months. 

10.Ingrid Goes West (8/11): If a dark comedy centered around the toxicity of social media that stars Elizabeth Olsen, O' Shea Jackson Jr., Wyatt Russell and Aubrey Plaza- who is probably my favorite human being on the planet right now- doesn't end up kicking all sorts of ass, Summer 2017 will go down as a catastrophic failure.

9.King Arthur: Legend of the Sword (5/12): The multiple release date changes are kind of alarming (it was initially set for release last July), but the trailers have been universally excellent and I have faith in Guy Ritchie's ability to put a unique spin on this classic story.

8.Wind River (8/4): After penning the scripts to acclaimed crime dramas Sicario and Hell or High Water in back-to-back years, Taylor Sheridan is finally making his directorial debut with Wind River. There's nothing out about this at the moment outside of some reviews from its premiere at Sundance (which were primarily very positive) in January, but the quality of Sheridan's past two screenplays along with the pairing of Jeremy Renner and Elizabeth Olsen in the lead roles is enough to make this my most anticipated indie movie of the summer.

7.Spider-Man: Homecoming (7/7): Every time I get fed up with them and their safe approach to superhero movies, those bastards at Marvel find a way to rope me back in. Tom Holland's portrayal of the friendly neighborhood web-slinger in Captain America: Civil War was so good that I'm now looking forward to seeing the 43,135th Spider-Man reboot that the Marvel overlords have put out in the last 15 years. Those comic book fatcats have me by the balls and I hate it so much. 
  
6.Baby Driver (6/28): Writer/director Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) is one of the most inventive filmmakers working today and even though my cynical-ass is having a hard-time buying into the overwhelmingly positive reviews that came out of its premiere at South by Southwest in March, I'm still expecting this music-driven heist film to be another winner for Wright. 

5.Baywatch (5/25): Unlike the campy 90's TV series it's based on, the Baywatch movie appears to have a lot more going for it than slow-motion running and David Hasselhoff's trademark overacting. The trailers boast a self-aware tone that is reminiscent of the Jump Street movies and the casting of two of Hollywood's most consistent standout comic performers (Dwayne Johnson and Zac Efron) in the lead roles is a stroke of genius. Of course with it being Baywatch, the presence of some alright-looking ladies including Priyanka Chopra, Kelly Rohrbach and Alexandra "Demon Eyes" Daddario in the supporting cast also doesn't hurt.  

4.The House (6/30): I'm one of the 12 people that enjoyed Brendan O' Brien and Andrew J. Cohen's first two films (Neighbors and Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates), so naturally I'm excited for their latest project. Leads Will Ferrell and Amy Pohler have a strong, established rapport with each other and the unique, hilarious premise (a 40-something couple starts a casino in their basement to help pay for their daughter's college tuition) should give these comedy heavyweights plenty of freedom to run wild.  

3.Rough Night (6/16): The redband trailer wasn't as good as I'd hoped it would be, but there's so many hilarious people attached to this project (Ilana Glazer, Jillian Bell, Kate McKinnon, Paul W. Downs, Lucia Aniello) that I still feel like it could end up being the best comedy of the summer, if not the whole year.

2.Atomic Blonde (7/28): The first solo directorial effort from David Leitch (John Wick) has the potential to be a legitimate B-action masterpiece. The cast is loaded with top-end talent (Charlize Theron, James McAvoy, John Goodman, Sophia Boutella) that knows how to handle this type of over-the-top material and both trailers that are currently out show off of a lot of cleanly-shot, elaborately-choreographed fight scenes that are reminiscent of Leitch's spectacular 2014 directorial debut. Can not wait for this one. 

1.Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 (5/5): Given Marvel's inconsistent track record with sequels, it wouldn't come as a huge shock if Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 ended up underwhelming. However, the prospect of going on another whacked-out journey with Star-Lord, Gamora, Drax, Rocket and Groot is too intriguing for me to not be super excited about this.

Also Interested In:
Chuck (5/5) 
Snatched (5/12) 
Alien: Covenant (5/19)
Berlin Syndrome (5/26)
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales (5/26)
War Machine (5/26)
Band-Aid (6/2) 
Dean (6/2) 
Wonder Woman (6/2)
Beatriz at Dinner (6/9)
The Hero (6/9)
It Comes at Night (6/9)
The Mummy (6/9)
All Eyez on Me (6/16)
The Book of Henry (6/16)
Transformers: The Last Knight (6/21)
The Big Sick (6/23)
Okja (6/28)
The Little Hours (6/30)
A Ghost Story (7/7)
Patti Cake$ (7/7)
To the Bone (7/14)
War for the Planet of the Apes (7/14)
Dunkirk (7/21)
Landline (7/21)
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets (7/21) 
Brigsby Bear (7/28)
The Dark Tower (8/4)
Detroit (8/4) 
The Glass Castle (8/11)
The Only Living Boy in New York (8/11)
The Hitman's Bodyguard (8/18)
Logan Lucky (8/18)
Crown Heights (8/25)

2017 NFL Draft Winners and Losers

Biggest Winners: Indianapolis Colts 
No folks, this is not a typo. New general manager Chris Ballard brought sensibility back to the Colts war room after Ryan Grigson's tumultuous 5-year tenure as the head of the team's front office with a terrific draft haul that addressed a majority of the team's top needs. The Colts were able get to acquire 3 immediate defensive starters in safety Malik Hooker, cornerback Quincy Wilson and edge rusher Tarrel Basham within the first 80 picks of the draft without having to sacrifice any future assets in the process. After adding a trio of nice defensive pieces in the first 3 rounds, Ballard spent the final day of the draft adding depth to the offense (tackle Zach Banner, running back Marlon Mack) and taking smart gambles on accomplished college players who didn't have the athletic upside to go earlier in the draft (inside linebacker Anthony Walker Jr., cornerback Nate Hairston). It's clearly too early to tell if these players are going to being able to help push this currently middling Colts team back into the playoff hunt, but on paper, the Ballard-era is off to a very promising.
Honorable Mentions: Cleveland Browns, Los Angeles Chargers, New Orleans Saints

Biggest Losers: Chicago Bears
After winning 9 games in the last 2 seasons, there's clearly a lot of pressure for the Bears front office and coaching staff to right the ship in 2017. The pressure of being on the hot seat forced Bears general manager Ryan Pace to make some of the most desperate picks I've seen in my decade or so of closely following the NFL Draft. The Bears quickly became the laughing stock of Round 1 after they traded up from #3 to #2 to select North Carolina quarterback Mitch Trubisky, just 2 months after signing former Buccaneers backup Mike Glennon to a 3-year/$45 million deal in free agency. The Trubisky disaster was followed-up by the equally head-scratching selection of Ashland tight end Adam Sheehan,an insanely raw player who has no experience playing against top-level competition, in round 2. Pace redeemed himself a bit on day 3 with the addition of an underrated safety prospect in Eddie Jackson and a much-needed pass-catching back in Tarik Cohen, but it wasn't nearly enough to make up for the absurd reaches he made in the early rounds and failure to address the team's abundance of issues on the defensive side of the ball. 
Dishonorable Mentions: Denver Broncos, Detroit Lions, New York Jets

Best Overall Pick: Marshon Lattimore to the Saints (11th overall)
Thanks to some quarterback overdrafting and a run on receivers in the top 10, top corner prospect Marshon Lattimore fell into the Saints lap at #11. With his combination of top-notch ball skills, freakish athleticism and relentless physicality, Lattimore has a great chance of giving the Saints secondary the top corner they've lacked for the majority of the Drew Brees-era. 
Honorable Mentions: David Njoku to the Browns (29th overall), Jonathan Allen to the Redskins (17th overall), Malik Hooker to the Colts (15th overall)

Worst Overall Pick: Mitch Trubisky to the Bears (2nd overall)
While I thought Mitch Trubisky was the best quarterback available in this draft class, there's no universe where he deserved to be a top-5 pick. With just 1 year of starting experience at North Carolina and a skill set that needs to be greatly refined before he can have any degree of success at the professional level, Trubisky is far too much of a project to justify taking a gamble on with such a high draft pick. The pick makes even less sense when you consider that the Bears just handed $16 mil in guaranteed money to veteran Mike Glennon in free agency this offseason. This move isn't fair to either of these guys and could end up creating the type of massive divide in the locker room that a team in the middle of a rebuild can't afford to have. Barring some kind of unforeseen miracle, the Bears decision to select Trubisky is on track to go down as one of the most misguided, franchise-damaging picks in the history of the NFL Draft.  
Dishonorable Mentions: Patrick Mahomes to the Chiefs (10th overall), DeShaun Watson to the Texans (12th overall), Garret Bolles to the Broncos (20th overall)

5 Biggest Potential Sleepers:
1.Corn Elder, cornerback (Selected 152nd overall by the Carolina Panthers)
2.George Kittle, tight end (Selected 146th overall by the San Francisco 49ers)
3.Desmond King, cornerback/safety (Selected 151st overall by the Los Angeles Chargers) 
4.Blair Brown, inside linebacker (Selected 148th overall by the Jacksonville Jaguars)
5.Marlon Mack, running back (Selected 143rd overall by the Indianapolis Colts)
 
5 Biggest Potential Busts: 
1.DeShaun Watson, quarterback (Selected 12th overall by the Houston Texans)
2.Garret Bolles, tackle (Selected 20th overall by the Denver Broncos)
3.Jabrill Peppers, safety/inside linebacker (Selected 25th overall by the Cleveland Browns)
4.Marlon Humphery, cornerback (Selected 16th overall by the Baltimore Ravens)
5.Reuben Foster, inside linebacker (Selected 31st overall by the San Francisco 49ers)

Overall Grades (full draft classes for all 32 teams can be found here: http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap3000000804541/article/2017-nfl-draft-quicksnap-grades-for-all-32-teams

Atlanta Falcons: B
Arizona Cardinals: B
Baltimore Ravens: B+
Buffalo Bills: B+
Carolina Panthers: A-
Chicago Bears: D+
Cincinnati Bengals: A-
Cleveland Browns: A-
Dallas Cowboys: A-
Denver Broncos: C
Detroit Lions: C+
Green Bay Packers: B
Houston Texans: B
Indianapolis Colts: A
Jacksonville Jaguars: A-
Kansas City Chiefs: B
Los Angeles Chargers: A-
Los Angeles Rams: B
Miami Dolphins: B
Minnesota Vikings: B+
New England Patriots: B+
New Orleans Saints: A-
New York Giants: B+
New York Jets: B-
Oakland Raiders: B+
Philadelphia Eagles: A-
Pittsburgh Steelers: B
San Francisco 49ers: B+
Seattle Seahawks: B+
Tampa Bay Buccaneers: A-
Tennessee Titans: B
Washington Redskins: B+