2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 12

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(2) Detroit Lions (9-1) Week 12 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

2.(3) Buffalo Bills (9-2) Week 12 opponent: Bye

3.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (9-1) Week 12 opponent: Carolina Panthers

4.(7) Pittsburgh Steelers (8-2) Week 12 opponent: Cleveland Browns

5.(5) Minnesota Vikings (8-2) Week 12 opponent: Chicago Bears

6.(6) Green Bay Packers (7-3) Week 12 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

7.(8) Philadelphia Eagles (8-2) Weel 12 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

8.(4) Baltimore Ravens (7-4) Week 12 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers 

9.(11) Los Angeles Chargers (7-3) Week 12 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

10.(10) Arizona Cardinals (6-4) Week 12 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

11.(9) Washington Commanders (7-4) Week 12 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

12.(14) Houston Texans (7-4) Week 12 opponent: Tennessee Titans

13.(17) Denver Broncos (6-5) Week 12 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

14.(12) San Francisco 49ers (5-5) Week 12 opponent: Green Bay Packers

15.(18) Los Angeles Rams (5-5) Week 12 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

16.(13) Atlanta Falcons (6-5) Week 12 opponent: Bye

17.(16) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-6) Week 12 opponent: New York Giants

18.(19) Miami Dolphins (4-6) Week 12 opponent: New England Patriots

19.(20) Seattle Seahawks (4-6) Week 12 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

20.(15) Cincinnati Bengals (4-7) Week 12 opponent: Bye

21.(21) Indianapolis Colts (5-6) Week 12 opponent: Detroit Lions

22.(24) New Orleans Saints (4-7) Week 12 opponent: Bye

23.(22) Chicago Bears (4-6) Week 12 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

24.(23) New England Patriots (3-7) Week 12 opponent: Miami Dolphins

25.(25) New York Jets (3-8) Week 12 opponent: Bye

26.(27) Carolina Panthers (3-7) Week 12 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs

27.(26) Cleveland Browns (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

28.(28) Dallas Cowboys (3-7) Week 12 opponent: Washington Commanders

29.(31) Tennessee Titans (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Houston Texans

30.(29) Las Vegas Raiders (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Denver Broncos

31.(30) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-9) Week 12 opponent: Bye

32.(32) New York Giants (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

Week 11 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Jared Goff (Lions)

A relative cold streak for Goff came to an abrupt stop in Week 11 as he absolutely dismantled the lethargic Jaguars (412 YDS, 4 TD's, 21 Rushing YDS) in what very well could've been the most lopsided game played in the NFL so far this season. Goff will try and keep rolling against a poor Colts defense in Week 12.  

Honorable Mentions: Joe Burrow (Bengals), Bo Nix (Broncos), Matthew Stafford (Rams)

LVP: C.J. Stroud (Texans)

Stroud was once again average-to-below-average in a potential breakout spot, throwing for 257 scoreless YDS, adding another 26 on the ground and chucking an INT against the porous Cowboys. He's indisputably in the midst of a sophomore slump and should be viewed as a QB2 the rest of the way. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Kirk Cousins (Falcons), Jayden Daniels (Commanders), Lamar Jackson (Ravens)

Running Back

MVP: Joe Mixon (Texans)

With Stroud refusing to light it up in a cupcake matchup with the Cowboys, it was up to Mixon to power the Texans offense to victory, and he met the moment gracefully with 20/109/3 on the ground and 2/44 as a receiver. After this performance, Mixon now has 6 100+ YD performances and has scored at least 1 TD in every game he's finished this season. He'll be a top 5 RB1 play for this Sunday's divisional clash with the Titans.     

Honorable Mentions: Saquon Barkley (Eagles), David Montgomery (Lions), Breece Hall (Jets)

LVP: Tony Pollard (Titans)

For the 2nd straight week, an elite defensive front completely eliminated Pollard from the game as the Titans back gained just 29 YDS on 11 touches (9 carries, 2 receptions) against the Vikings. Things will only get slightly easier for Pollard this week as Titans are set to take on a Texans team that has allowed the 6th least fantasy points to RB's this season.

Dishonorable Mentions: Aaron Jones (Vikings), Travis Etienne (Jaguars), Nick Chubb (Browns)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions)

While still performing at a WR1 level, St. Brown had only one excellent performance over his past seven games coming into this week. Those figures are now up to two out of his last eight as St. Brown had his best game of 2024 against the Jaguars, reeling in 11 catches for 161 YDS and 2 TD's. St. Brown has a date with the Colts in the Week 12.

Honorable Mentions: Cooper Kupp (Rams), Tee Higgins (Bengals), Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

LVP: Terry McLaurin (Commanders)

McLaurin was in HELL last Thursday night as he struggled to get open against the Eagles upstart secondary. Unsurprisingly, his consistent lack of separation led to him logging season lows in receptions (1), YDS (10) and targets (2) as the Commanders suffered a tough divisional loss. He should get back into the good graces of his fantasy managers this week against a checked out, banged-up Cowboys squad.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Garrett Wilson (Jets), Deebo Samuel (49ers), DeAndre Hopkins (Chiefs)

Tight End

MVP: Taysom Hill (Saints)

Anybody who streamed Hill as an injury replacement for George Kittle, Sam LaPorta or Dalton Kincaid was handed quite the gift. The Mormon Missile was at the peak of versatile powers on Sunday against the Browns, throwing for 18 YDS, catching 8 passes for 50 YDS and rushing for 138 YDS and 3 TD's on just 7 carries. He also threw a pick and lost a fumble, but that doesn't really matter when he's stuffing the stat sheet like this. This will go down as a legendary performance that helped swing a lot of games and makes for an incredible addition to the already rich lore of a true folk hero in this silly game.  

Honorable Mentions: Jonnu Smith (Dolphins), Brock Bowers (Raiders), David Njoku (Browns)

LVP: Kyle Pitts (Falcons)

Kirk Cousins played like absolute shit against the Broncos on Sunday afternoon and unsurprisingly, Pitts suffered the most out of the Falcons top targets-being held to just 1 catch for 9 YDS on 3 targets. Their Week 12 bye couldn't be arriving at a better time for Pitts and his offensive cohorts as they've really hit a wall over the past couple games after a pretty strong stretch from Weeks 4-9.     

Dishonorable Mentions: T.J. Hockenson (Vikings), Pat Friermuth (Steelers), Mark Andrews (Ravens)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Texans

In a development that should shock no one, the Cooper Rush-led Cowboys got obliterated by the Texans ferocious defense. DeMeco Ryans' group secured 5 sacks, an INT and a fumble recovery that they returned for a TD in an easy 34-10 win. They'll have another golden opportunity to clean up in Week 12 against the turnover-happy, pass protection-challenged Titans offense.  

Honorable Mentions: Broncos, Vikings, Lions

LVP: Chiefs

Outside of Josh Allen serving them up a gift of an INT in the second quarter, the Chiefs defense had an uncharacteristically brutal showing against the Bills-surrendering 30 points and logging 0 sacks. A Week 12 showdown with the Panthers represents a potentially incredible bounceback spot.       

Dishonorable Mentions: Chargers, Jets, Saints

Movie Review: Red One

Cycling through an array of genres (buddy, fantasy, action, comedy, family drama) in service of a story that ultimately boils down to being about a dirtbag computer hacker/degenerate gambler/deadbeat father (Chris Evans) learning to become a decent person after being recruited by the head of a mythical creatures intelligence agency (Lucy Liu) to aid Santa's top bodyguard (Dwayne Johnson) in finding out who kidnapped Ol' Saint Nick (J.K. Simmons) approximately 24 hours before his worldwide present-delivering venture on Christmas Eve, Amazon's big Christmas blockbuster Red One presents itself as a big cornucopia of multi-faceted fun. But when you crack open that big mythical horn, the feast of abundance isn't as bountiful or delightful as promised. 

All of the efforts from Johnson, his production team at Seven Bucks and hand-picked writer/director duo of Chris Morgan (Fast and Furious franchise from Tokyo Drift through Hobbs & Shaw, Shazam!: Fury of the Gods) and Jake Kasdan (both new Jumanji films, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story) to make something that checks multiple audience-friendly boxes ironically results in it missing the page entirely. What is the point of crafting a genre stew when you don't have the heart or the courage to commit to any of the ingredients individually, let alone as a cohesive whole? Without any meaningful efforts to make this wacky recipe work, all your left with is a milquetoast hodgepodge of half-baked ideas, unfilled potential and holiday cheer that has all the warmth and sincerity of a fucking Hallmark card. 

Even if it remained noncommittal to a genre and just injected a dash of Christmas with the Kranks or Jingle All the Way-esque cynical holiday depravity into the proceedings, it would've developed some much-needed personality that would've made it at least a little bit memorable. Something that at least claims to have aspirations of being an original Christmas-themed film that entertains a wide audience shouldn't be a such a big ball of nothing. Nobody is expecting something like Red One to be a bold film that challenges the conventions of mainstream filmmaking in the 2020's, but the pervasive plainness it shows with its open fear of embracing the genre-mixing that its concept invites is just plain lazy filmmaking. Will the majority of the kids that see it this holiday season enjoy it? Most likely, yes. Will most of those same kids want to watch it again next holiday season? Probably not. Dwayne and co. would probably be satisfied enough with those results if they were to materialize but making a movie that people struggle to remember by the time next November rolls around does nothing to break the memorability rut this beloved subgenre has been in since the mid 2000's.                                     

Grade: C

Lucy Liu Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Lucy Liu-whose latest project "Red One" releases in theaters today. 

Lucy Liu's Filmography Ranked:

18.Code Name: The Cleaner (D+)

17.Charlie's Angels (C)

16.Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (C)

15.Strange World (B-)

14.Shazam!: Fury of the Gods (B-)

13.Payback (B)

12.The Man with the Iron Fists (B)

11.Jerry Maguire (B)

10.Kung Fu Panda 3 (B)

9.Kung Fu Panda 2 (B)

8.Gridlock'd (B)

7.Kung Fu Panda (B)

6.Set It Up (B)

5.Shanghai Noon (B)

4.Lucky Number Slevin (B)

3.Kill Bill: Volume 2 (B)

2.Detachment (B+)

1.Kill Bill: Volume 1 (A+)

Top Dog: Kil Bill: Volume 1 (2003)

This absolutely immense piece of martial arts splatter vigilante goodness is my favorite thing Quentin Tarantino has made in the 21st century. The energy here is just relentlessly insane even by Tarantino's lofty standards, Uma Thurman's steely, simmering rage makes The Bride an elite vengeance-seeking protagonist and the Crazy 88 fight is probably the best action sequence Tarantino has ever put together. 

Bottom Feeder: Code Name: The Cleaner (2007)

The best part about Code Name: The Cleaner is that sounds like a completely made-up movie. Like what do you mean, there's a comedy where Cedric the Entertainer plays a man who wakes up in a hotel room with a dead body and has to figure out if he's a secret agent or a janitor? In a weird way, it's a peak January movie as it executes a high concept in a deeply questionable fashion, resulting in a bad movie that doesn't even have the courtesy to be memorably terrible.   

Most Underrated: Grid'locked (1997)

Tim Roth and Tupac Shakur make for a great buddy duo in this entertaining crime dramedy about a pair of heroin addicts who encounter a string of absurd hurdles as they attempt to check into rehab that ended up being Shakur's final acting role before his death. If you enjoy stuff like Trainspotting and Go, I'd encourage you to go seek this one out.   

Most Overrated: Kill Bill: Volume 2 (2004)

Here's a scorcher of a take: I think this is Tarantino's worst movie besides Death Proof. As terrific as the final sequence with The Bride and Bill is, the glut of flashbacks that make up the bulk of the film's runtime kneecap the urgency of The Bride's mission. It really is a blessing that somebody forced Tarantino to split this into two films because promptly downshifting from the hyperkinetic Tokyo sequence that Volume 1 ends on to this would've sucked the life out of the room.    

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 11

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (9-0) Week 11 opponent: Buffalo Bills

2.(2) Detroit Lions (8-1) Week 11 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

3.(3) Buffalo Bills (8-2) Week 11 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

4.(4) Baltimore Ravens (7-3) Week 11 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

5.(5) Minnesota Vikings (7-2) Week 11 opponent: Tennessee Titans

6.(6) Green Bay Packers (6-3) Week 11 opponent: Chicago Bears

7.(8) Pittsburgh Steelers (7-2) Week 11 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

8.(10) Philadelphia Eagles (7-2) Week 11 opponent: Washington Commanders 

9.(7) Washington Commanders (7-3) Week 11 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

10.(14) Arizona Cardinals (6-4) Week 11 opponent: Bye

11.(13) Los Angeles Chargers (7-3) Week 11 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

12.(12) San Francisco 49ers (5-4) Week 11 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

13.(9) Atlanta Falcons (6-4) Week 11 opponent: Denver Broncos

14.(11) Houston Texans (6-4) Week 11 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

15.(17) Cincinnati Bengals (4-6) Week 11 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

16.(15) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-6) Week 11 opponent: Bye

17.(18) Denver Broncos (5-5) Week 11 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

18.(16) Los Angeles Rams (4-5) Week 11 opponent: New England Patriots

19.(24) Miami Dolphins (3-6) Week 11 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

20.(20) Seattle Seahawks (4-5) Week 11 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

21.(21) Indianapolis Colts (4-6) Week 11 opponent: New York Jets

22.(19) Chicago Bears (4-5) Week 11 opponent: Green Bay Packers

23.(30) New England Patriots (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

24.(32) New Orleans Saints (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Cleveland Browns

25.(23) New York Jets (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

26.(26) Cleveland Browns (2-7) Week 11 opponent: New Orleans Saints

27.(31) Carolina Panthers (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Bye

28.(22) Dallas Cowboys (3-6) Week 11 opponent: Houston Texans

29.(29) Las Vegas Raiders (2-7) Week 11 opponent: Miami Dolphins

30.(25) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-8) Week 11 opponent: Detroit Lions

31.(27) Tennessee Titans (2-7) Week 11 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

32.(28) New York Giants (2-8) Week 11 opponent: Bye  

Week 10 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

 Quarterback

MVP: Joe Burrow (Bengals)

The second meeting between the Bengals and Ravens this season provided the world with another epic QB duel and once again, Burrow had a better statline (428 YDS, 4 TD's, 6 rushing YDS, 0 turnovers) than Lamar Jackson despite his team losing. Burrow should be in line for a much quieter evening this week as the Bengals take on a stingy Chargers D on SNF.   

Honorable Mentions: Lamar Jackson (Ravens), Jalen Hurts (Eagles), Kyler Murray (Cardinals)

LVP: Jayden Daniels (Commanders)

While it wasn't a completely horrendous performance, the Steelers were able to keep Daniels relatively quiet as he threw for 202 scoreless YDS and only picked up 5 YDS on his 3 rushing attempts. The OROY frontrunner gets the Eagles and their top 5 ranked defense in Week 11. 

Dishonorable Mentions: C.J. Stroud (Texans), Sam Darnold (Vikings), Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers)

Running Back

MVP: Bijan Robinson (Falcons)

Robinson majorly picked up the slack for an inefficient Kirk Cousins against the Saints, gaining 144 scrimmage YDS on 23 touches (20 carries, 3 receptions) and scoring twice on the ground in a heartbreaking divisional loss for the current NFC South leaders. He'll look to extend his insane streak of earning 18+ fantasy points in half PPR leagues to 6 games this week versus a Broncos defense that currently ranks in the middle of the pack against RB's.  

Honorable Mentions: Chuba Hubbard (Panthers), James Conner (Cardinals), Chase Brown (Bengals)

LVP: Travis Etienne Jr. (Jaguars)

Having Mac Jones under center and Tank Bigsby exiting the game with an injury early in the 1st quarter opened up a window for Etienne to seize control of the Jags offense in a surprisingly close game with the Vikings on Sunday afternoon. He failed to do that, turning his 11 carries into 44 YDS and adding just a lone catch for -1 YDS in the passing game. Regardless of Bigsby's status for their Week 11 contest with the Lions, Etienne will be nothing more than a desperation RB2/flex play against one of the league's few truly elite run defenses.    

Dishonorable Mentions: D'Andre Swift (Bears), J.K. Dobbins (Chargers), De'Von Achane (Dolphins)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

Remember when Chase put up a 10 REC/193 YD/2 TD line against the Ravens in Week 5? Well, it turns out that was only a small taste of the damage he was capable of inflicting on them. The Bengals star went full-blown nuclear against the poor, overmatched Ravens D-catching 11 passes for 264 YDS and 3 TD's. Chase's season high against teams that don't hail from Baltimore is 118 YDS and he's only cleared 62 YDS in one other game besides that, so this level of dominance hasn't been the norm for him at all in 2024, but maybe this latest explosion can be the springboard that elevates him to a more consistent level of strong play in the second half of the season.    

Honorable Mentions: Calvin Ridley (Titans), George Pickens (Steelers), Courtland Sutton (Broncos)

LVP: DeVonta Smith (Eagles)

A combination of Hurts only having to throw 20 passes on account of the score, A.J. Brown soaking up nearly half of the targets that were available and a nagging hamstring ailment lowering his snap count a bit led to Smith putting up a really quiet performance (2 REC/14 YDS) against the depleted, dejected Cowboys. As long as he's good to go physically, Smith will be a volatile WR2 for this Thursday's contest with the Commanders.   

Dishonorable Mentions: D.J. Moore (Bears), Zay Flowers (Ravens), Brian Thomas Jr. (Jaguars)

Tight End

MVP: Travis Kelce (Chiefs)

Kelce's late career rebranding as a high-volume short yardage threat continues to pay dividends for fantasy owners as he hauled in a team-high 8 receptions for 64 YDS and what ended up being the game-winning TD in a good old-fashioned AFC West rock fight with the Broncos. The nice 3-game streak he's put together over the past month is in real jeopardy of ending this week against a Bills defense that has allowed the 9th least points to tight ends this season.    

Honorable Mentions: Mark Andrews (Ravens), Sam LaPorta (Lions), George Kittle (49ers)

LVP: Jake Ferguson (Cowboys)

A lost fumble sunk Ferguson's line against the Eagles (4 REC/24 YDS) from relatively poor to very poor. With Dak Prescott now confirmed to be out for the season, Ferguson's already questionable fantasy value could continue to crater. He'll get a chance to regain the trust of his managers next Monday night against the Texans up-and-down secondary.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Dalton Kincaid (Bills), Hunter Henry (Patriots), Cole Kmet (Bears)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Eagles

Cooper Rush and co. handed the Eagles an abundance of gifts on Sunday as Vic Fangio's group secured 3 sacks, an INT and 4 (!) fumble recoveries in a 34-6 victory over the Cowboys. They have a date with the Commanders on Thursday night.   

Honorable Mentions: Bills, Vikings, Chargers

LVP: Jets

Man, the Cardinals just made a complete mockery of the Jets formerly vaunted defense-who generated 1 sack and 0 takeaways-this week in a 31-6 slaughter in Glendale. As poor as this group has looked on the whole since Robert Saleh's ouster in early October, they should do just fine against a wretched, turnover-happy Colts offense this week. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Bears, 49ers, Ravens

Movie Review: Heretic

Religious discourse occupies a unique space in the modern world because its prevalence tends to correlate with where you live and who you're surrounded by. Faith meaning anywhere between everything or nothing at all depending on who you elect to talk to has created this chasm that not only applies in how much discussion about it is being had in the world, but the very manner in which its discussed. Psychological horror/thriller Heretic dares to ask its audience something that almost no one bothers to ask anymore: What is the purpose of faith, and can your beliefs be challenged by your life experience or an outside force?

This question-driven exploration of faith manifests in the story of Mormon missionaries Sister Barnes (Sophie Thatcher) and Sister Paxton (Chloe East) and their visit with a man named Mr. Reed (Hugh Grant) at his home with the hopes of converting him to their Church. Reed is a hardcore theology buff who is eager to discuss religion and the nature of belief with a pair of people that have dedicated their lives to spreading the gospel of The Church of the Latter-day Saints. What starts off as a somewhat awkward but ultimately good-natured conversation slowly becomes sinister when the Sisters realize that Reed's "wife"-who he said was is in the other making a blueberry pie when they first arrived-doesn't exist and all of the doors in his house are locked on a timer that they don't have to access to. What Reed wants from these women is simple: He's put together a game to put their belief in a higher power to the test and the path they choose will dictate whether they leave his house safely or die. Terrified and conflicted on what direction to go in, Sister Barnes and Sister Paxton must lean on each other if they wish to make it out of Reed's house of faith-testing horror with their lives.

What's really cool about Heretic is that its writer/director tandem Scott Beck and Bryan Woods waste no time getting to the suspenseful hook. Reed's ominous lectures about religion, subtly disorienting camerawork that mirrors the feeling of the walls closing in on you and sound design that turns benign domestic sounds (ticking clocks, creaking doors, footsteps) into something viscerally sinister mimics the increasingly claustrophobic dread Barnes and Paxton are feeling as they realize their safety may be compromised. This feeling of palpable discomfort is parlayed into a pretty terrific second act where their fears are confirmed in ways they probably didn't even imagine as the threat stars to veer from vague hypothetical to something terrifyingly real. It's basically everything that a contained cat-and-mouse thriller should be and the fashion in which it marries its existential questions about religion with traditional horror filmmaking practices is really seamless.                      

Of course, a chamber piece wouldn't really work if it weren't for the contributions of its cast and the actors in Heretic all deliver in a major way. Grant is having a ball playing this kind of eccentric, somewhat pretentious maniac who cruelly preys on the vulnerable in a similar fashion as the religious figures he rails against do and both East and Thatcher do great work by turning the baked-in assumption that these characters are meek, polite-to-a-fault women on its head with the quiet strength and resilience they show in the face of grave danger. 

Eventually, Heretic loses its way during a final act where it's ideas about things such as idealism vs. truth in faith and what drives people to believe or not believe in God come together in an unsatisfying, arguably silly manner that snuffs out quite a bit of the strength of the film's riveting opening 2/3's. Still, this is a really solid bounceback project for Beck and Woods after the misguided 65 and an exceptional advertisement for any filmmaker that is seeking the services of any of these three gifted actors for a future project.                        

Grade: B