March in Film

March ushers in the two-month transitional between the dead of winter and the start of summer blockbuster season in May with a combination of huge tentpole and mid-budget releases. Here are my thoughts on the large slate of March films.

Films I want to see:
6.Dead Man Down (3/8):This is a pretty cool looking noir-thriller with a solid cast and a talented director. Colin Farrell is on a hot streak right now and this film has the all the makings to keep that quality streak going.

5.Olympus Has Fallen (3/22):It's been a while since we've had a White House-takeover movie and this is the first of two to be released this year. Olympus Has Fallen is more intriguing to me than June's White House Down due to the presence of director Antoine Fuqua. Fuqua's last film, Brooklyn's Finest, was a bit of a letdown, but I expect him to recover with this film. Fuqua is one of the best directors at handling action in Hollywood and the trailer looks like a good time. It also doesn't hurt that the always great Morgan Freeman and Aaron Eckhart are cast in major roles.

4.The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (3/15): The trailer is solid albeit not great, but this film still has the potential to be completely hilarious given the amount of comedic talent involved. I mean Steve Carrell, Jim Carrey, Steve Buscemi and Alan Arkin in the same movie? Sign me up!

3.Spring Breakers (3/22):This looks like a completely batshit crazy movie and I'm sure it is with Harmony Korine at the helm. I'm curious to see how Selena Gomez fares in a way off-type role and James Franco's character looks highly entertaining. I'm expecting pure chaos, hopefully it doesn't disappoint

2.G.I Joe: Retaliation (3/29): I was one of the handful of people who liked the first installment, so naturally I'm excited for the sequel. This one looks way better than the original and the additions of action superstars Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and Bruce Wills is just plain awesome. The clip I saw in IMAX 3D last month was badass and stunning visually so hopefully that will lead to a great, mindless, pre-summer blockbuster action film.

1.The Place Beyond the Pines (3/29):This film is one of the more intriguing of the year. The cast is loaded with talent including Ryan Gosling and Bradley Cooper in the lead roles (who are two of the best working actors in Hollywood in my opinion) as well as up-and comer Dane DeHann and grizzled veterans Ray Liotta and Bruce Greenwood in the supporting cast. The early reception on the film festival circuit has been excellent and the premise seems very interesting. This has all the makings of a top-notch crime drama filled with incredible performances.

Films I'm not sure about:
Jack the Giant Slayer (3/1):The early reception has been surprisingly good and that paired with a strong cast and director Bryan Singer definitely makes for some potential. At the same time though, this film looks pretty dumb and I still don't see how they can successfully make Jack and the Beanstalk into a feature-length film. Might check it out on DVD, but I'm leaning towards no at the moment.

21 and Over (3/1):I am a big fan of R-rated raunchy comedies, but this film doesn't really look that funny. This love of R-rated comedies and lack of said comedies so far this year will probably drive me to see this at some point, but I'm not expecting much.

Oz: The Great and Powerful (3/8):Oz: The Great and Powerful is a film I'm really hesitant to see, but at the same time I kind have to check it out. I don't want to see it because it looks like a carbon-copy of Tim Burton's acid-trip version of Alice in Wonderland. I do want to see it because of the great cast and more importantly, to see what visionary director Sam Rami did with the story of Oz. This film has loaded me with simultaneous curiosity and skepticism. Either way, It shall be interesting to see how it plays out.

Admission (3/22): I am a big fan of Paul Rudd and Tina Fey, but this film looks kind of middling and too indie for either of them.

The Host (3/29): The premise is intriguing, but considering it's based on a book by Twilight author Stephanie Meyer, I definitely have my reservations about seeing it.

Film I have zero interest in:
The Last Exorcism Part II (3/1): I've heard the original is absolutely abysmal and the exorcism genre has been stale for a LONG time.

The Call (3/15): Halle Berry has really fallen on hard times. I can't remember the last time she was in anything that wasn't X-Men related that was even remotely good and this cheap-looking thriller seems to continue the (mostly) awful streak she has been on since she won an Oscar for her performance in Monster's Ball way back in 2001.

The Croods (3/22): Pretty weak looking animated film with surprisingly poor animation. Not even seeing Nicolas Cage voice a caveman will get me to see this one.

Temptations of a Marriage Counselor (3/29): Tyler Perry strikes again! Pass.....

Album Review: Coheed and Cambria-The Afterman: Descension

Coheed and Cambria returned with a full head of steam with last year's The Afterman: Ascension. The return of original drummer Josh Eppard seems to have energized the band to make their best material in years. The Afterman: Descension, the second part of the double album, doesn't quite hit the heights of it's predecessor Ascension, but it's still a solid entry to Coheed and Cambria's discography.

The Afterman: Descension is undoubtedly the most progressive and experimental record Coheed and Cambria has released to date. There's a lot of bizarre shit on here that's even out of the ordinary for a band  like Coheed that is no stranger to taking chances. The synth and horn line on the 80's-sounding "Number City" and the spacey chaos of album opener "Prelethal" threw me for a loop in just how bonkers they sounded. Neither song is terrible by any means, they're just a little uneven due to their odd sound. Outside of those mixed experiments and the weak ballad "Iron Fist", the steps that Coheed takes out of their comfort zone work pretty well. The mid-paced "Dark Side of Me" is effectively chilling while "2's My Favorite 1" is one of the few slow songs in their discography that isn't stagnant and makes good use of Claudio Sanchez's unique vocals. As usual, Coheed and Cambria is at their best when they are crafting faster-paced songs."Key Entity Extraction V: Sentry the Defiant" wraps up the already brilliant Key Entity Extraction series from Ascension on a very high note. It keeps up the unpredictable, energetic vibe of the first four parts of the series and it's without a doubt the finest track on this record. "The Hard Sell" and "Gravity's Union" also make for grand prog rock tracks with sprawling hooks and great musicianship across the board. They are truly great at pretty much everything they do musically, but they are at their best when they are just rocking out with great riffs and infectious choruses/vocal lines. 

The Afterman: Descension is a quality record and a fitting companion to The Afterman: Ascension.The diversity this record has to offer is jarring at times, but mostly very appealing and effective. It's great to see they going more and more out of their comfort zone even though some of the experiments don't really work. It's not quite as triumphant as Ascension, but The Afterman: Descension has it's fair share of memorable tracks and unique quirks to standout on its own.

3.5/5 Stars
Standout Tracks
1.Key Entity Extraction V: Sentry the Defiant
2.The Hard Sell
3. Gravity's Union

Most Anticipated Albums of 2013

Better later than never for this I guess... Clearly February is nearly over, but I figured since it's been a slow month for music and movies, It would be the perfect to bang out a list for my most anticipated records for 2013. This year hasn't gotten off to the greatest start, but I fully expect that to change with a plethora of exciting releases on the docket for the next nine months. Here is my 20 most anticpated release for the rest of 2013 and some other noteworthy releases I'm excited for.
  
20.Last Chance to Reason (Release Date: TBD)
19.Letlive (Release Date: TBD)
18.Amon Amarth (Release Date: TBD)
17.Red Fang (Release Date: TBD)
16.Born of Osiris (Release Date: TBD)
15.The Story So Far-What You Don't See (Release Date: March 26th)
14.Earl Sweatshirt-Doris (Release Date: TBD)
13.August Burns Red (Release Date: TBD)
12.Alice in Chains-The Devil Put Dinosaurs Here (Release Date: May)
11.After the Burial-Haunt and Catalyst (Release Date: TBD)
10.Behemoth (Release Date: TBD)
9.Intronaut-Habititual Levitations (Instilling Words with Tones) (Release Date: March 19th)
8.Skeletonwitch- (Release Date: TBD)
7.Revocation (Release Date: TBD)
6.Queens of the Stone Age (Release Date: TBD)
5.Protest the Hero (Release Date: TBD)
4.Mastodon (Release Date: TBD)
3.The Dillinger Escape Plan-One of Us is the Killer (Release Date: May)
2.The Black Dahlia Murder-Everblack (Release Date: June)
1.Killswitch Engage-Disarm the Descent (Release Date: April 2nd)

Other releases I'm highly anticipating:
Clutch-Earth Rocker (Release Date: March 19th)
Finntroll-Blodsvept (Release Date: March 26th)
Tyler, The Creator-Wolf (Release Date: April 2nd)
Terror-Live by the Code (Release Date: April 2nd)
Volbeat-Outlaw Gentleman and Shady Ladies (Release Date: April 9th)
Rob Zombie-Venomous Rat Regeneration Vendor (Release Date: April 23rd)
Howl-Bloodlines (Release Date: April 30th)
The Ocean (Release Date: April 30th)
Dark Tranquility-Construct (Release Date: May 27th)
Danny Brown-Old (Release Date: TBD)
Scale the Summit-The Migration (Release Date: TBD)
Megadeth-Super Collider (Release Date: TBD)
Big K.R.I.T and Yelawolf-Country Cousins (Release Date: TBD)
Ghostface Killah and MF Doom (Release Date: TBD)
Animals as Leaders (Release Date: TBD)
In Flames (Release Date: TBD)
Children of Bodom (Release Date: TBD)
Slayer (Release Date: TBD)
DevilDriver (Release Date: TBD)
Chimaira (Release Date: TBD)
TesseracT (Release Date: TBD)
Austrian Death Machine (Release Date: TBD)

Concert Review: Meshuggah, Boston, MA, Februrary 17th, 2013

After nearly three months of concert withdrawals, my first show of 2013 was finally here and what a way to kick it off with Meshuggah, Animals as Leaders, and Intronaut destroying the House of Blues in Boston last night.

Intronaut kicked off the festivities for the evening. They were my favorite band on the bill last night and this was the first time I had the chance to see them since way back in 2009 when they opened for Mastodon on the Crack the Skye tour. As expected, they were great. What impresses me the most about Intronaut (especially in a live setting) is their rhythm section. Their customary set closer "Australopithecus" is especially awesome because both their guitarists/vocalists leave the stage during the last minute of the song and just let the bassist/drummer jam. Not too many bands do anything like that and it's really badass to see the bassist and drummer get some love. They have a new record coming out in March called Habitual Levitations (I picked up the album cover shirt + digital download card for the whole record last night) and the new stuff they played was fantastic. "The Welding" particularly impressed me, it has an absolutely killer riff and some of the more impressive bass parts of their discography so far. I was really glad I had the opportunity to see Intronaut again after almost four years and I can't wait for their new record to be released next month.

Animals as Leaders was up next. This marked my third time seeing them and they were impressive as hell. There's something about watching Tosin Abasi play live that is awe-inspiring. I don't play guitar so I can't fully appreciate his talent, but his pure skill at playing the guitar is almost unfathomable. He makes insane sweep-picking look effortless and no matter how technical or atmospheric the part, he plays it flawlessly. I've said it before and I will say it again: Tosin Abasi is arguably the best guitarist in all of metal. One thing that surprised me was how crazy the moshing was during their set. The previous two times I saw them, the crowd was into it, but there wasn't much moshing. This time around, people were going fucking crazy and the pits were gigantic (especially during "CAFO") and didn't waver throughout their entire set. Animals as Leaders is always awesome to see live and I look forward to seeing them again in the future. Stupid, but funny side story: Near the end of "Weightless", someone threw a bag of weed on stage. Tosin proceeded to pick up the bag of weed, stare at it intently for about a minute, then throw back into the crowd.

Meshuggah closed out the evening. For years I had heard about crushingly heavy Meshuggah was live and now having seen them, I can confirm that to be true. Saying Meshuggah is heavy live would be a gross understatement, they are essentially the musical equivalent of getting with a freight train live. Their set was just over an hour of pure mayhem. Each and every song hit so hard in a live setting ("Bleed" is a contender one for  heaviest live song I've ever seen). The set contained mostly stuff from their newest record, Koloss, which I didn't think too highly of, but the tracks were much better and far less monotonous live (especially "Do Not Look Down" and "I Am Colossus".) Their intensity on stage nor the crowd's intensity let up for even a second. This was legitimately one of the craziest crowds I've ever been a part of. The pits were ridiculous and this marked only the second time out of the over 50 shows I've been to where I've sucked into a pit. How I escaped as fast as I did is beyond me, but somehow I did it. I also have to commend their vocalist Jens Kidman for his performance. He is recovering from a severe throat infection, but with his performance last night you wouldn't have know it. Meshuggah's live show is powerful and relentlessly heavy. This was my first time seeing Meshuggah, but it sure as hell will not be my last. Great show and an excellent way to start off my concert going for 2013.

Scores:
Intronaut 8.5/10
Animals as Leaders 8.5/10
Meshuggah 8.5/10

Setlists:
Intronaut:
Milk Leg
The Welding
Past Tense
The Literal Black Cloud
Australopithecus

Animals as Leaders:
Earth Departure
Tempting Time
Do Not Go Gently
Wave of Babies
Cylindrical Sea
New Eden
Weightless
CAFO

Meshuggah:
Swarm
Do Not Look Down
Behind the Sun
The Hurt That Finds You First
I Am Colossus
Mind's Mirrors
In Death-Is Life
In Death-Is Death
Shed
Bleed
Break Those Bones Whose Sinews Gave It Motion
Straws Pulled at Random

Encore:
Dancers to a Discordant System

Movie Review: A Good Day to Die Hard

"I'm on fuckin vacation" John McClane exclaims during the final battle of A Good Day to Die Hard. Our beloved hero is also accurately describing the approach the filmmakers took while making A Good Day to Die Hard. The fifth film in this storied franchise drops the ball big time. The whole production just seems rushed and incredibly lazy. The winning Die Hard formula of amazing action sequences, compelling villains, engaging stories and clever one-liners is almost completely abandoned . There is hardly any original or more importantly, entertaining ideas tossed around in this film. Just about every action scene seems lifted from other, superior films,The jokes miss the mark and the villains are completely unmemorable and useless. The film just coasts by as a pedestrian action film for most of it's runtime with only the occasional burst of solid action (most of which comes in the final action sequence of the film.) Taking more points away from this already subpar film is the presence of Jai Courtney as John McClane's CIA agent son Jack. I can't put a finger as to why, but I can't stand Courtney as actor. There's no coincidence that he appears in the two weakest recently released action films (this and Jack Reacher), this guy sucks. I sincerely feel bad for Bruce Willis. He tries his best with what the material that's given to him, but even he can't save this film from imploding on itself. Unlike a lot of this films detractors, I actually want them to make another film in this series. They need to bring in a a talented writer and director and just pretend this film didn't happen. I can't live with arguably the best American action movie franchise in film history ending on such a frustratingly mediocre note. John McClane deserves better than this damn it! I know it's very early in the year, but A Good Day to Die Hard is a frontrunner for the most disappointing film of 2013.

2.5/5 Stars   

Top 10 Most Intriguing NFL Free Agents

After just over a week without football, I already miss it. Hockey and Basketball are cool and all, but there's nothing quite like football to me. Thankfully for me, the always exciting free agency period starts exactly one month from today on March 12th. As usual, there are a lot of quality players hitting the open market and a lot of intriguing possibilities as to where they might end up. Here are my picks for the 10 most intriguing free agents available this offseason.
Note: I'm excluding guys like Joe Flacco and Victor Cruz because there is pretty much no chance they leave their respective current teams. This list is strictly guys that could realistically be leaving their current teams in free agency.

10.Brent Grimes, cornerback (Current team: Atlanta Falcons)
Grimes missed all of 2012 after tearing his Achilles in the season opener, but that shouldn't deter Atlanta from re-signing him. Grimes is a vastly underrated corner whose absence exposed just how essential he is to Atlanta's secondary. Atlanta could very well see his injury too much of a red flag to re-sign him, but I do believe there are pretty good odds he returns to the Falcons.
Possible Destinations: Atlanta Falcons, New England Patriots, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Philadelphia Eagles,Denver Broncos, Detroit Lions  

9.Ed Reed, free safety (Current team: Baltimore Ravens)
Clearly if this was five years ago, Ed Reed would be at or near the top of this list. Now at 34, the future hall-of-famer has undeniably lost a step. That being said, Reed still has a couple quality years left in him and his veteran presence could help out teams with young secondaries. The Ravens would like to keep him if they could, but the asking price could be too much with the amount of key free agents they are looking to re-sign.
Possible Destinations: Baltimore Ravens, New England Patriots, New York Giants, Buffalo Bills

8.Ahmad Bradshaw, running back (Current team: N/A)
Ahmad Bradshaw was just released by the New York Giants to clear cap space to re-sign Victor Cruz and possibly make a run at some other free agents. Despite his injury problems, He's only 26 and he did rush for just over 1,000 yards last season while playing hurt and splitting carries with Andre Brown and David Wilson. Bradshaw could make an excellent power back compliment to a speedy back like Chris Johnson in Tennessee or provide a team like Green Bay with a proven starter who can run the ball consistently. There are a lot of teams that could use Bradshaw's services and while he not might be the most purely talented player on the market, his versatility definitely makes him one of the more interesting ones.
Possible Destinations: Tennessee Titans, Green Bay Packers, St.Louis Rams (if Steven Jackson retires/does not return), New York Jets, Indianapolis Colts, Pittsburgh Steelers, Miami Dolphins

7.Reggie Bush, running back (Current team: Miami Dolphins)
Reggie Bush finally reached his potential during his two years in Miami. It would make complete sense for him to stay in Miami solely for the fact that he's finally putting up solid numbers and has become a much better back as a member of the Dolphins. The problem is that Bush might be too expensive for the Dolphins to retain if they want to pick up a marquee wide receiver like Greg Jennings or Mike Wallace in free agency. If Bush keeps his price tag within reason, I see him staying in Miami. Otherwise, he'll be leaving South Beach and the team that gave his first taste of true success as a running back.
Possible Destinations: Miami Dolphins, Green Bay Packers, New York Jets, Pittsburgh Steelers, St. Louis Rams

6.Jarius Byrd, free safety (Current team: Buffalo Bills)
Jarius Byrd is one of the most underrated players in the NFL. The two-time Pro Bowler has been one of the few bright spots on an otherwise pretty dismal Buffalo defense. Byrd has already developed into one of the league's premier free safeties in only four seasons in the league and the Bills can not afford  to let a talent like leave him in free agency. Unfortunately for Buffalo, There are sure to be a lot of contenders that want this underrated talent on their roster.
Possible Destinations: Buffalo Bills, Baltimore Ravens, New England Patriots, New York Giants, Carolina Panthers

5.Mike Wallace, wide receiver (Current team: Pittsburgh Steelers)
Mike Wallace is one of the more promising young receivers. His hands could use some work, but his blistering speed alone make him one of the most dangerous deep threats in the league. After the Steelers failed to negotiate a long-term deal with him last year, I'd say his odds of returning to Pittsburgh this season are slim. With more consistent play and the right system, Wallace could flourish into one of the best wideouts in the league.
Possible Destinations: San Fransisco 49ers, Miami Dolphins, Minnesota Vikings, Pittsburgh Steelers, Washington Redskins, Chicago Bears    

4.Jake Long, tackle (Current team: Miami Dolphins)
Despite an injury-plagued 2012, There is no question that former number one overall draft pick in 2008 is one of the best tackles in the league. If Miami makes it a priority to re-sign Reggie Bush, they need to also re-sign Long, who was a key part of Bush's first 1,000-yard rushing season in 2011. Long is guaranteed to get a ton of offers from various teams in this otherwise weak free agency class for offensive lineman which could very well lead to him leaving Miami.
Possible Destinations: Miami Dolphins, Philadelphia Eagles, Arizona Cardinals, Chicago Bears, Dallas Cowboys

3.Wes Welker, wide receiver (Current team: New England Patriots)
A lot of people will call me crazy for not having Welker at the top of the list, but his success level is largely attributed to playing with Tom Brady. Welker is clearly a perfect fit for the Patriots system and they will probably re-sign him, but Welker could very well get more money elsewhere and there are slot receivers  like Brian Hartline available for less money who could be a good fit for the Patriots as well.
Possible Destinations: New England Patriots, San Diego Chargers, Minnesota Vikings, Miami Dolphins, Arizona Cardinals

2.Dwayne Bowe, wide receiver (Current team: Kansas City Chiefs)
Dwayne Bowe might end up being the biggest steal of the whole 2013 free agency class. He's got all the tools to be an elite wide receiver in the league, the only thing holding him back has been the lack of anyone to get him the ball in Kansas City. The only way I see him staying in Kansas City is if they get a quarterback like Alex Smith or Matt Flynn via trade otherwise he's probably going to go to a team with a proven, consistent quarterback.
Possible Destinations: Kansas City Chiefs, Pittsburgh Steelers, Chicago Bears, New England Patriots, St. Louis Rams, Washington Redskins, Seattle Seahawks, San Diego Chargers, San Fransisco 49ers, Miami Dolphins

1.Greg Jennings, wide receiver (Current team: Green Bay Packers)
Greg Jennings is still a top-flight wideout in this league, Green Bay just has no shortage of them and they aren't going to want to have pay Jennings along with blossoming young wideouts Randall Cobb and James Jones and fellow veteran Jordy Nelson. Jennings is craving for a feature role again and there are plenty of teams out there that could use his services (Miami looks like the frontrunner at the moment, Jennings has expressed an interest to reunite with former Packers offensive coordinator, Joe Philbin, who is now the Dolphins head coach.) I expect Jennings to be the most valuable catch (no pun intended) of this free agency period.
Possible Destinations: Miami Dolphins, Pittsburgh Steelers, San Diego Chargers, Kansas City Chiefs, St.Louis Rams, Chicago Bears

Other Notable Free Agents:
Abram Elam, strong safety (Current team: Kansas City Chiefs)
Andre Brown, running back (Current team: New York Giants)
Andy Letvitre, guard (Current team: Buffalo Bills)
Anthony Fasano, tight end (Current team: Miami Dolphins)
Aqib Talib, cornerback (Current team: New England Patriots)
Brandon Albert, tackle (Current team: Kansas City Chiefs)
Brandon Gibson, wide receiver (Current team: St.Louis Rams)
Brandon Stokley, wide receiver (Current team: Denver Broncos)
Brian Hartline, wide receiver (Current team: Miami Dolphins)
Brian Urlacher, middle linebacker (Current team: Chicago Bears)
Bryant McKinnie, tackle (Current team: Baltimore Ravens)
Carey Williams, cornerback (Current team: Baltimore Ravens)
Cedric Benson, running back (Current team: Green Bay Packers)
Chase Blackburn, middle linebacker (Current team: New York Giants)
Chris Canty, defensive tackle (Current team: N/A)
Cliff Avril, defensive end (Current team: Detroit Lions)
Connor Barwin, outside linebacker (Current team: Houston Texans)
Dallas Clark, tight end (Current team: Tampa Bay Buccaneers)
Danario Alexander, wide receiver (Current team: San Diego Chargers)
Danell Ellerbe, middle linebacker (Current team: Baltimore Ravens)
Danny Amendola, wide receiver (Current team: St.Louis Rams)
Danny Woodhead, running back (Current team: New England Patriots)
Dashon Goldson, free safety (Current team: San Fransisco 49ers)
Delanie Walker, tight end (Current team: San Fransisco 49ers)
Devery Henderson, wide receiver (Current team: New Orleans Saints)
Domnique Rodgers-Cromarite, cornerback (Current team: Philadelphia Eagles)
Donnie Avery, wide receiver (Current team: Indianapolis Colts)
Dustin Keller, tight end (Current team: New York Jets)
Dwight Freeney, outside linebacker/defensive end (Current team: Indianapolis Colts)
Erin Henderson, outside linebacker (Current team: Minnesota Vikings)
Felix Jones, running back (Current team: Dallas Cowboys)
Fred Davis, tight end (Current team: Washington Redskins)
Glover Quin Jr., free safety (Current team: Houston Texans)
Henry Melton, defensive tackle (Current team: Chicago Bears)
Isaac Sopoaga, nose tackle (Current team: San Fransisco 49ers) 
Jared Cook, tight end (Current team: Tennessee Titans)
Jason Hanson, kicker (Current team: Detroit Lions)
Josh Cribbs, wide receiver/kick returner (Current team: Cleveland Browns)
Julian Edleman, wide receiver (Current team: New England Patriots)
Justin Bannan, defensive tackler (Current team: Denver Broncos)
Kennan Lewis, cornerback (Current team: Pittsburgh Steelers)
Kevin Ogletree, wide receiver (Current team: Dallas Cowboys)
Kyle Vanden Bosch, defensive end (Current team: N/A)
LaRon Landry, free safety (Current team: New York Jets)    
Lawrence Tynes, kicker (Current team: New York Giants)  
LeGarette Blount, running back (Current team: Tampa Bay Buccaneers)
Leroy Hill, outside linebacker (Current team: Seattle Seahawks)
Marcus Trufant, cornerback (Current team: Seattle Seahawks)
Martellus Bennett, tight end (Current team: New York Giants)
Michael Bennett, defensive end/tackle (Current team: Tampa Bay Buccaneers)
Osi Unimenyora, defensive end (Current team: New York Giants)
Patrick Chung, free safety (Current team: New England Patriots)
Paul Kruger, outside linebacker/defensive end (Current team: Baltimore Ravens)
Phil Dawson, kicker (Current team: Cleveland Browns)
Quentin Jammer, cornerback (Current team: San Diego Chargers)
Ramses Barden, wide receiver (Current team: New York Giants)
Randy Moss, wide receiver (Current team: San Fransisco 49ers)
Rashard Mendenhall, running back (Current team: Pittsburgh Steelers)  
Richard Seymour, defensive tackle (Current team: Oakland Raiders)
Rob Bironas, kicker (Current team: Tennessee Titans)
Rocky Bernard, defensive tackle (Current team: New York Giants)
Ronde Barber, free safety (Current team: Tampa Bay Buccaneers)
Ryan Clady, tackle (Current team: Denver Broncos)
Ryan Mundy, free safety (Current team: Pittsburgh Steelers)
Sam Shields, cornerback (Current team: Green Bay Packers)
Sebastian Volmer, tackle (Current team: New England Patriots)
Sedrick Ellis, nose tackler (Current team: New Orleans Saints)
Shaun Cody, nose tackle (Current team: Houston Texans)
Shaun Phillips, linebacker/defensive end (Current team: San Diego Chargers)
Shonn Greene, running back (Current team: New York Jets)
Steven Jackson, running back (Current team: St.Louis Rams)
Terence Newman, cornerback (Current team: Cincinnati Bengals)
Tracy Porter, cornerback (Current team: Denver Broncos)
  

Movie Review: Seven Psychopaths

Writer/director Martin McDonagh picked up a cult following the release of his 2008 black comedy In Bruges. McDonagh is sure to advance his reputation as a cult icon after another success with Seven Psychopaths. Much like In Bruges, Seven Psychopaths is a very funny and often brutally violent film with a few unexpected twists to throw the audience for a loop. McDonagh packs the script with sharp dialogue and barrage of colorful and entertaining characters that are very Tarintino-esque without feeling like a ripoff or imitation. The film evenly splits it's time between being a zany story about alcoholic screenwriter Marty (Colin Farrell) working on his most recent screenplay fittingly called "Seven Psychopaths" and a story about an insane mobster (Woody Harrelson) trying to get his kidnapped dog back from Marty's deranged best friend Billy (Sam Rockwell), who kidnaps dogs temporarily for the reward money for returning them to their owners. In addition to McDonagh's sharp script, the cast is excellent. Each actor gives their character a zany energy and adds to the twisted fun vibe of the film. Sam Rockwell and Christopher Walken are the standouts among the titular psychopaths. Rockwell brings a strange likability to his character Billy. He is clearly a deranged man with more than a couple of screws loose yet you still sympathize with him. Rockwell really owns the role and if it wasn't such a strong year for supporting performnaces, I would say his work here would be Best Supporting Actor material. Not to be outdone by Rockwell, Walken brings huge laughs as Billy's reserved, but still demented partner Hans. Walken hasn't this much fun on-screen since The Rundown in 2003 and it was great to see his signature wackiness back on the big screen. Seven Psychopaths is a giddily violent and clever dark comedy. The style and tone of this film isn't for everyone with the amount of graphic violence and a storyline based around screenwriting that can be confusing with the frequent shifting between scenes from the script of the film within a film and the "real" storyline, but if you don't mind a film with an offbeat and sick sense of humor, Seven Psychopaths is a wildly entertaining and fun romp.

4/5 Stars

Snowstorm Movie Marathon

Unless you live under a rock, you've heard that New England and other select parts of the Northeast are going to get pounded by a blizzard tonight and into tomorrow. Given this (alleged) impending doom and the fact that I am sick at the moment, I've decided to spend  the next couple days watching as many movies as possible. If all goes well, I plan to watch the following:
Seven Psychopaths (already watched this morning)
End of Watch
Zombieland
The Hurt Locker
Snatch
21 Jump Street
The Wackness
Black Swan

I wanted this marathon to be a nice mix of serious fare and all types of comedy. When I watch a lot of movies in a short period of time, I like to the make my film selections as diverse as possible and  I believe this group of films accomplishes that. If you're in the northeast, stay safe and let's pray this storm doesn't hit us as hard as expected. Now if you'll excuse me, I have movies to watch...

Movie Review: Beasts of the Southern Wild

Beasts of the Southern Wild tore up the festival circuit in early 2012 and went on to be an arthouse hit when it was released nationwide in June. Last month, the film surprised everyone in the film community by picking 4 Academy Award nominations including Best Picture, Best Actress and Best Director. With all these accolades, I figured I'd give Beasts of the Southern Wild a shot. To my surprise, this film not only failed to live up to the hype, it's the worst film I've seen from 2012.

Beasts of the Southern Wild reminded me a lot of last year's The Tree of Life. The story is incoherent and abstract with only a few events occurring over the course of the film and the rest of it being pointless filler with the occasional "what the fuck?" moment to save the viewer from falling asleep This film is an obvious metaphor for post-Katrina New Orleans with a fantasy/dystopian background substituting for the damage the hurricane left behind. What could have been a truly beautiful story about a 9-year old girl trying to find her long-lost mother after her father falls ill after a devastating storm wipes out her bayou community is instead an orgy of pretentiousness and nonsense aimed at the film snob crowd. Co-writer/director Benh Zeitlin seems more focused on doing his best Terrence Malick impression with a hodgepodge of random events that serve as a feeble attempt at a story and plenty of self-indulgent camerawork then giving us well-developed characters or even an actual story. A majority of this film is just 9-year old Hushpuppy (Quvenzhane Wells) being yelled at by her father (Dwight Henry) for no reason at all. How a film which is mostly comprised of just poorly-shot yelling until the last 15 minutes is hailed as a masterpiece and a truly moving film is beyond me. What saves this film from being one of the worst I've ever seen is the actors. They try their best to work with the wildly underdeveloped material they are given, but they can't really do much of anything to take this terrible script out of the gutter.  To me, this was a film with no context or real reason to exist. This is essentially a tripped-out fantasy version of the hardships and poverty that occurred after Hurricane Katrina and it just doesn't work in the slightest. Beasts of the Southern Wild is nothing but pretentious indie garbage and I can't fathom how it picked up so much acclaim.

1/5 Stars   

Super Bowl Prediction

Baltimore Ravens over San Fransisco 49ers: This is a game that a lot of football fans (including myself) desperately wanted and I don't expect it to disappoint. This Super Bowl has no shortage of great storylines (The Battle of the Harbaughs, Ray Lewis's final game, Colin Kapernick's rapid rise to the top, Joe Flacco potentially joining the ranks of  elite quarterbacks) and with these two evenly-matched teams hitting the field, I'm a expecting a battle. This should be a physical game that will be won in the trenches and while either side could very well come away with the victory, I like the Ravens in this game. This team has rallied around Ray Lewis and is truly playing their best football of the season. The Ravens need to establish the run, shut down the 49ers lethal pistol formation and have Joe Flacco make big plays in order to win this game and they are definitely capable of doing that. No one expected them to make it here and I think the fire of being the underdog and wanting to win a Super Bowl  for Ray Lewis in his final season will lead them to victory in a very close game.