Week 2 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2026 Edition

Quarterback

Biggest Winner: Josh Allen (Bills)

Week 2 kicked off with Allen putting together one of the vintage stat sheet-stuffing performances that has made him the most coveted fantasy quarterback in the league over last few seasons. The Bills signalcaller lit up the Lions limp defense from the opening whistle until they took their foot off the gas early in the 4th quarter once a victory was guaranteed, throwing for 248 YDS and 3 TD's and rushing for 69 YDS and 2 TD's on 14 carries. Through 2 games, Allen looks like he's going to be in the thick of the MVP race once again and could very well be in line to win the league's top honor for the 2nd time in the last 3 years. He gets handed the gift of playing a Chargers team that has looked like complete shit out of the gate and could be on the verge of full-blown implosion in Week 3.

Honorable Mentions: Dak Prescott (Cowboys), Patrick Mahomes (Chiefs), Jared Goff (Lions)

Biggest Loser: Trevor Lawrence (Jaguars)

After playing lights out in the opener against the Browns, Lawrence crashed back to Earth in a big way in Week 2 with a pretty poor performance (189 YDS/0 TD's/1 INT, 2 CAR/6 YDS) against a Broncos defense that returned to form after a horrid showing against the Chiefs in Week 1. Lawrence will be on the QB1/QB2 borderline for their Week 3 matchup with the Patriots. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Drake Maye (Patriots), Justin Herbert (Chargers), Lamar Jackson (Ravens)

Running Back

Biggest Winner: Jonathan Taylor (Colts)

While Taylor wasn't consistently effective against the Chiefs on Sunday night, he was once again the focal point of the Colts offense and made enough plays to be a top-tier RB1 play by turning his 24 carries into 92 YDS and 2 TD's. As an added bonus, he also managed to be more involved with the passing game than usual-hauling in 4 receptions for 40 YDS. Taylor could be in line for tougher sledding this week when the Colts take on a Texans defense that has been very good against the run so far. 

Honorable Mentions: Kenneth Walker III (Chiefs), Christian McCaffery (49ers), James Cook III (Bills)

Biggest Loser: David Montgomery (Texans)

After an impressive debut against the Bills, Montgomery completely flopped in his second game with the Texans. The veteran RB was a complete afterthought as the Bengals dismantled Houston's offense on their home field. securing just 8 touches (6 carries, 2 receptions) for 24 YDS. What made this performance particularly alarming is that Montgomery got out snapped and out touched by Woody Marks, although the second year back also didn't fare well (40 scrimmage YDS on 10 touches) against this suddenly excellent Bengals defense. Montgomery should be able to bounce back against a Colts defense that has gotten killed by the rush in both games this season.

Dishonorable Mentions: Jeremiyah Love (Cardinals), Travis Etienne (Saints), Rhamondre Stevenson (Patriots)

Wide Receiver

Biggest Winner: Jaxson Smith-Njigba (Seahawks)

JSN casually annihilated an overmatched Cardinals defense on Sunday, securing 9 receptions for 155 YDS and 3 TD's. The reigning Offense Player of the Year is off to another incredible start and will look to keep rolling against a Commanders defense that CeeDee Lamb torched this past week. 

Honorable Mentions: Davante Adams (Rams), CeeDee Lamb (Cowboys), Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions)

Biggest Loser: Malik Nabers (Giants)

Nabers' much anticipated return to action in 2026 produced another dud as he struggled to deal with a physical Rams secondary that was hellbent on proving their embarrassing Week 1 loss to the 49ers in Melbourne was mostly a product of jet lag and a completely out of rhythm Jameis Winston. He ended up catching just 1-of-4 targets for 1 YD in what was a really horrendous MNF loss for the Giants that erased all of the excitement that was surrounding them after their nice Week 1 win over the Cowboys.  About the only positive that stemmed from this game was that Nabers shook off a shoulder injury that looked serious when it initially happened and returned to action after missing only one drive. With Winston locked in as the starter for the next 4-6 weeks while Jaxson Dart is sidelined with what is believed to be an MCL sprain, Nabers will be facing an uphill battle to return to weekly fantasy relevance. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Luther Burden III (Bears), Ladd McConkey (Chargers), DK Metcalf (Steelers)

Tight End

Biggest Winner: Travis Kelce (Chiefs)

Sunday night produced a host of horrific sights for the people that believed the Chiefs reign of terror was finally over after their below average 2025 campaign as not only did Patrick Mahomes look like his old self, but the nearly 37-year-old Kelce turned back the clock with a vintage dominant performance as the Chiefs clear top receiving threat (9/101/1) in an OT win over the Colts. Kelce is now firmly back on the weekly TE1 radar and could be in line for another big day against the Dolphins sorry ass defense in Week 3.

Honorable Mentions: Dalton Schultz (Texans), Dalton Kincaid (Bills), Jake Ferguson (Cowboys)

Biggest Loser: Colston Loveland (Bears)

Good news, Loveland made his first catch of the season against the Vikings. Bad news, it was the only reception he made on the day, and it was for 3 YDS. It's been an alarmingly slow start to 2026 for Loveland as he's only managed 5 targets and the aforementioned lone reception through 2 games. With Tyson Bagnet presumably starting for at least a game or two while Caleb Williams recovers from the hamstring injury he suffered on Sunday, Loveland might not be able to imminently turn things around. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Tucker Kraft (Packers), Kyle Pitts (Falcons), Brenton Strange (Jaguars)

Defense/Special Teams

Biggest Winner: Patriots

On a day where the Patriots offense didn't look all that great overall, the defense showed up in a big way and allowed them to cruise to a 20-3 victory over the Steelers. Zak Kuhr's group made life miserable for the Steelers offensive line, running backs and ancient QB, registering 4 sacks, an INT and a fumble recovery TD from Elijah Ponder that came off a strip sack by Christan Barmore. The current number 1 scoring defense in the NFL has a date with the Jaguars this week. 

Honorable Mentions: Vikings, Rams, Seahawks

Biggest Loser: Buccaneers

Typically, streaming a defense against the Browns is a surefire way to secure a lot of fantasy points. This week, that plan backfired spectacularly as the Buccaneers got embarrassed by a Browns offense that could barely even move the ball until garbage time against the Jaguars in Week 1. While it was bad enough that the Buccaneers logged 2 sacks and 0 takeaways and surrendered 23 points in the loss, the most embarrassing aspect of their performance was allowing the league's premier washed up sex pest Deshaun Watson to have his best game (24/30, 238 YDS and 2 TD's, 6 carries for 23 yards) in years. There's no danger of anyone hanging onto the Bucs D/ST heading into this week and anybody that got burned by them here will probably think twice before electing to play them as a streaming option later in the season. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Ravens, Eagles, Jaguars

Movie Review: Resident Evil (2026)

 

No video game property has garnered more attention from the film/television industry this century than Resident Evil. The original Mila Jovovich-led movie franchise from Paul W.S. Anderson spawned a whopping six entries from March 2002-January 2017 and since the start of the 2020's, there's been both an ill-fated movie (2021's Welcome to Racoon City) and television series reboot (the 2022 Netflix series that was so widely panned that it got some people to retroactively be kinder to Welcome to Racoon City)  True to the cliche phrase, the third time was the charm when it came to reinvigorating Resident Evil as a film brand as the rights holders over at Constantin Film and Sony brought in Zach Cregger (Weapons, Barbarian) to handle the latest big screen adaptation of the classic survival horror/zombie franchise.  

What's particularly cool about Cregger's Resident Evil is its simplicity. He completely eschews the expectations placed upon those who are brave and/or foolish enough to take on the responsibility of turning a popular video game into a movie by refusing to recreate a specific game or digging into the franchise's lore. Instead of forging down the comfortable fan service path, he elected to build a movie around dropping an original character named Bryan (Austin Abrams, who somehow manages to be even more magnetic and hilarious here than he was in Weapons) into a real time survival situation as he tries to transport an important mystery medical package into Racoon City mere hours after the heinous virus that mutates humans into bloodthirsty zombies accidently made its way out of a lab at the Umbrella Corporation. 

Without having to strictly adhere to any characters or events from the franchise, Cregger gets to focus on something much more important: Accurately recreating how it feels to blindly step into a Resident Evil game. Every new place you encounter is a new opportunity to be greeted with the sight of some unholy monstrosity that's trying to kill you and through a combination of traditional movie photography and video game-inspired POV shots, he frames every scene in a way where Bryan is scanning every inch of his immediate surroundings to see where something could pop out from before deciding where to move. Unleashing a bumbling regular guy protagonist into such an unknown world of immense, horrifying danger only adds to the authenticity of this approach as he's doing shit on screen like dropping a flurry of f-bombs every time a threat announces its presence, frantically running around in circles trying to evade whatever nasty creature is chasing him and quickly pivoting from jubilation to panic when he discovers the thing he just shot in the head isn't actually dead mimics how the player behind the controller would be reacting to being confronted with these horrific scenarios. Constructing the movie in a manner that is centered around the sights, sounds and feelings that drive the experience of playing the game is great way to show reverence for the source material without shamelessly pandering to the fans with recreations of the scenes they like the most from the series (although from what I've read online from people in the know, there are plenty of easter eggs for them throughout). As much as I liked the trashy stylized action horror aesthetic of Anderson's movies, this movie's uniquely unqualified hero, visceral intensity and vile creature design/VFX made it an even more fun ride.

The cherry on top of this whole ordeal is that Cregger wraps things up on a definitive note that gives him the freedom to not return for a potential sequel. After all of the shit he's gotten from a vocal group of hardo fanboys online for being a "tourist" in the world of Resident Evil, he deserves to return to the solace of making original movies while quietly reflecting on the success his first IP-driven movie has enjoyed.   

Grade: B+

Paul Walter Hauser Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Paul Walter Hauser-whose latest project "Resident Evil" releases in theaters today. 

Paul Walter Hauser's Filmography Ranked:

16.Songbird (D)

15.Balls Up (C-)

14.Queenpins (C)

13.Late Night (B-)

12.The Luckiest Man in America (B-)

11.Springsteen: Deliver Me from Nowhere (B-)

10.Americana (B)

9.Super Troopers 2 (B)

8.Da 5 Bloods (B)

7.The Fantastic Four: First Steps (B)

6.Cruella (B)

5.Inside Out 2 (B)

4.Richard Jewell (B+)

3.BlacKkKlansman (B+)

2.The Naked Gun (A-)

1.I, Tonya (A)

Top Dog: I, Tonya (2017)

As this year's edition of the Toronto International Film Festival enters its final stretch, it's fitting that the opportunity to look back at one of the biggest independent movies to debut there in the last decade has presented itself. Not only did I, Tonya earn Allison Janney an Oscar, introduce the world to Hauser and contribute to Margot Robbie and Sebastian Stan being more taken more seriously as actors in subsequent years, it was one of the earliest signs that Neon was going to become a juggernaut in the American indie film space as this became the biggest acquisition they made during their first year of operations following its TIFF premiere. I, Tonya does such a great job of being both a chaotic, darkly comedic look at Tonya Harding's tumultuous life and painting a deeply sympathetic portrait of a woman who was vilified in the media for the actions of the people that surrounded her. It's kind of a shame that it only managed to earn 3 Oscar nominations (Robbie and editor Nicole Karakatsansis received the other nominations) in the very competitive 2017 field, but in my eyes at least, its legacy is far richer than many of the films that were competing for the big prizes that year.   

Bottom Feeder: Songbird (2020)

Rushing a COVID-themed pandemic movie into production and releasing it before the end of 2020 was a scummy move by everybody that was involved with Songbird. That being said, being in bad taste isn't even close to the biggest problem with this awful dystopian romance. How quickly Songbird came together is particularly felt in its nonsensical mess of a script that can't decide if it's trying to be gritty or fun, deeply unconvincing central romance (the lack of chemistry between K.J. Apa and Sofia Carson is so immediately apparent that it's almost impressive) and its veteran supporting cast that features the likes of Demi Moore, Bradley Whitford and Alexandra Daddrio seemingly only accepted their roles because the opportunity to leave their Los Angeles-area homes for a bit presented itself.  Honestly, the only redeeming element of the movie is Peter Stromare doing the cartoony villain schtick that he's so reliably good at and he doesn't have enough screen time to provide a meaningful jolt in the arm to this otherwise sleepy, stupid affair. 

Most Underrated: Richard Jewell (2019)

Now that's he 96 years old, it's safe to assume that Clint Eastwood has retired from directing and acting for good this time. With this in mind, I'm going to declare that Richard Jewell is the last great film he made. It actually serves as a great companion piece to I, Tonya as Eastwood delivers a compelling, thoughtful look at the unholy beast that is our sensationalism-driven media ecosystem that values scandalous headlines over humanity and how that reckless style of journalism contributed to ruining the life of security guard Richard Jewell (Hauser) after he was baselessly accused of staging the planting of an explosive device at the 1996 Summer Olympics in Atlanta after being hailed as a hero in the immediate aftermath for alerting the authorities and helping evacuate the area before it detonated. Hauser gives a heartbreaking turn as a man trying to cope with having his name dragged through the mud in the front of the whole world, Sam Rockwell and Kathy Bates further add to this story's rich emotional core with their fiery, vulnerable performance as Jewell's lawyer and mother respectively and Eastwood does a great job of delivering a bittersweet ending that argues that Jewell's eventual exoneration didn't free him from the deep emotional burden of being subjected to such a harrowing witch hunt. 

Most Overrated: None

Hauser is the epitome of a modern character actor. With that mantle comes a wide variety of work that spans across many different genres, budgets and release platforms. One thing he hasn't amassed across his impressively dynamic filmography is a film that I consider to be overrated. The heaviest of hitters he's appeared in (I, Tonya, BlacKkKlansman, The Naked Gun, Inside Out 2, Cruella, The Fantastic Four: First Steps) are all movies that I like to varying degrees while the rest are either too small or not broadly liked enough to pick up such a distinction. By the looks of the critical reviews so far, Resident Evil would certainly qualify for overrated status, but I would be stunned and disappointed if that ended up being the case. 

2026 NFL Power Rankings: Week 2

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Seattle Seahawks (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

2.(7) San Francisco 49ers (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Miami Dolphins

3.(9) Buffalo Bills (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Detroit Lions

4.(6) Chicago Bears (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

5.(13) Baltimore Ravens (1-0) Week 2 opponent: New Orleans Saints

6.(5) Houston Texans (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

7.(3) New England Patriots (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

8.(8) Philadelphia Eagles (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Tennessee Titans

9.(18) Kansas City Chiefs (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

10.(11) Jacksonville Jaguars (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Denver Broncos

11.(14) Minnesota Vikings (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Chicago Bears

12.(2) Los Angeles Rams (0-1) Week 2 opponent: New York Giants

13.(21) Cincinnati Bengals (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Houston Texans

14.(4) Denver Broncos (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars

15.(15) Detroit Lions (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Buffalo Bills

16.(16) Pittsburgh Steelers (1-0) Week 2 opponent: New England Patriots

17.(25) New York Giants (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

18.(10) Green Bay Packers (0-1) Week 2 opponent: New York Jets

19.(29) Arizona Cardinals (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

20.(28) New York Jets (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Green Bay Packers

21.(12) Los Angeles Chargers (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

22.(17) Dallas Cowboys (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Washington Commanders

23.(19) Carolina Panthers (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

24.(23) New Orleans Saints (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

25.(24) Washington Commanders (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

26.(20) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Cleveland Browns

27.(30) Las Vegas Raiders (1-0) Week 2 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

28.(22) Indianapolis Colts (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

29.(26) Atlanta Falcons (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Carolina Panthers

30.(27) Tennessee Titans (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

31.(32) Miami Dolphins (0-1) Week 2 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

32.(31) Cleveland Browns (0-1) Week 2 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers  

Week 1 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2026 Edition

Quarterback

Biggest Winner: Caleb Williams (Bears)

The Bears offense kicked off the 2026 campaign by absolutely obliterating the Panthers defense in Charlotte and Williams did his fair share to contribute to this highly productive day with the best dual threat outing of his career so far (269 YDS and 2 TD's through the air, 65 YDS and 2 TD's on the ground). Williams and the Bears should be in line for a much tougher test when they face off against Brian Flores' unpredictable Vikings defense on Sunday.

Honorable Mentions: Josh Allen (Bills), Jaxson Dart (Giants), Trevor Lawrence (Jaguars)

Biggest Loser: Bo Nix (Broncos)

While new Broncos OC Davis Webb didn't exactly cover himself in glory during his first game as an NFL playcaller, it would've been hard for any coach to have a good day with this version of Nix playing under center. The 3rd year QB looked completely overwhelmed by Steve Spaguolo's defense and comically out of rhythm with all of his pass-catchers in his first game action since breaking his ankle in the Broncos Divisional Round victory over the Bills in January as the Chiefs absolutely rolled over the defending AFC West champs last night. Nix will look to get back on track against the Jaguars at home in Week 2.

Dishonorable Mentions: Matthew Stafford (Rams), Drake Maye (Patriots), Justin Herbert (Chargers)

Running Back

Biggest Winner: Derrick Henry (Ravens)

Henry kicked off his age 32 season in style by lighting up the Colts defense for 144 YDS and 3 TD's on 24 carries. He also added a 19-YD reception on his sole target of the day. There's absolutely no reason to believe right now that Henry is in line to slow down in 2026 and it's going to be really fascinating to see how much longer he can continue to produce at this absurd clip. 

Honorable Mentions: Kenneth Walker III (Chiefs), D'Andre Swift (Bears), Jahmyr Gibbs (Lions)

Biggest Loser: Quinshon Judkins (Browns)

A suffocating Jaguars defense and horrendous gamescript (the Browns were down 24-0 with 6:18 left in the 2nd quarter) put Judkins in fantasy purgatory to kick off the season as he notched just 50 scrimmage YDS on 14 touches (12 carries, 2 receptions). Judkins will be a shaky FLEX option for the Browns Week 2 showdown with the Buccaneers. 

Dishonorable Mentions: James Cook III (Bills), Saquon Barkley (Eagles), Omarion Hampton (Chargers)

Wide Receiver

Biggest Winner: Christian Watson (Packers)

Prior to the Packers 3rd stunning late game collapse in their last 5 games dating back to last December, Watson was in line to be the #1 topic of discussion among Cheeseheads. The talented but erratic veteran receiver who is now officially the uncontested top pass-catcher in Green Bay was pretty much unstoppable for the first 3 quarters against the Vikings, turning 6 catches into 147 YDS and a pair of TD's. The Packers will be looking to redeem themselves in a big way this week when the Jets come into Lambeau. Watson should be viewed as a borderline WR1/2 option in this potential bloodbath game. 

Honorable Mentions: Justin Jefferson (Vikings), Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions), Chris Olave (Saints)

Biggest Loser: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

It's not every day that the Bengals ride their defense and Mike Gesicki to a victory, but that's precisely what happened against the Buccaneers in Week 1. Chase was barely involved at all catching 2-of-4 targets for 12 YDS-which tied him with Andrei Iosivas for seventh most on the team-on a day where Joe Burrow wasn't overly sharp. Chase could be in line to get the ball funneled to him early and often in Week 2 as the Bengals travel down to Houston to take on a Texans team that got torched through the air by the Bills in the season opener.

Dishonorable Mentions: Jaylen Waddle (Broncos), George Pickens (Cowboys), Terry McLaurin (Commanders)

Tight End

Biggest Winner: Isaiah Likely (Giants)

All of the buzz surrounding Likely emerging as a focal point of the Giants offense came to fruition in Week 1. The free agent pickup from the Ravens was who Jaxson Dart looked to whenever he was in a gotta have it situation on Sunday night against the Cowboys and he delivered on every single occasion-catching all 8 of his targets for 78 YDS and 2 TD's. If Likely can further solidify himself as Dart's most trusted option in the passing game, he should be in line to become one of this year's breakout fantasy stars.

Honorable Mentions: Dallas Goedert (Eagles), Trey McBride (Cardinals), Dalton Kincaid (Bills)

Biggest Loser: Colston Loveland (Bears)

The craziest part about Caleb Williams' big day against the Panthers in Week 1 is that his favorite receiver from the second half of last season wasn't involved at all. That's right, Loveland walked away with a goose egg and only got targeted twice as Kalif Raymond and Luther Burden led the way in receptions/receiving YDS and Cole Kmet and Jahdae Walker found the endzone. It should only be a matter of time before the second-year pro returns to his high-end TE1 form and a Vikings defense that struggled in coverage before their pass rush got cooking in the 4th quarter against the Packers could very well provide him with the redemption him and his fantasy owners are seeking. 

Dishonorable Mentions: George Kittle (49ers), Kyle Pitts (Falcons), Harold Fannin Jr. (Browns)

Defense/Special Teams

Biggest Winner: Steelers

About the only fireworks that came out of the Week 1 clash between the Steelers and Falcons were from the Steelers defense. Fill-in Falcons starter Cooper Rush proved to be his usual woeful self, getting sacked 4 times and throwing 2 picks including a pick 6 to T.J. Watt as the Steelers glided to a 20-13 victory in the first game of the Mike McCarthy-era. The Steelers could find themselves in a feast-or-famine situation in Week 2 depending on what version of Drake Maye shows up at Gillette Stadium on Sunday afternoon.

Honorable Mentions: Jaguars, Seahawks, Lions

Biggest Loser: Texans

Nearly all of the D/ST's that were first off the board in this year's drafts got off to a rough start in 2026, but none were as bad for fantasy purposes than the Texans. DeMeco Ryans' group was horrendous in coverage for most of the game and struggled to generate much pressure on Josh Allen, which lead them to coming out on the wrong end of a 36-31 shootout with just 2 sacks and 0 takeaways. They'll be aiming to return to the top of the D/ST food chain against the Bengals this Sunday. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Chargers, Rams, Broncos

Movie Review: Hope

I'd love to have been on a fly on the wall for the world premiere of Na Hong-jin's Hope at Cannes back in May. The prestigious French film festival doesn't shy away from screening genre films that aren't interested in being intellectually stimulating. In fact, it was just last year that the Australian shark serial killer movie Dangerous Animals debuted there. These films just tend to be screened in the Midnight Screenings sidebar section that has enough proximity from the main attractions to avoid drawing the ire of the people who are only there to watch movies that have higher artistic aspirations. Hope, on the other hand, was competing for the Palme d'or-the festival's top prize which regularly serves as a preview of what films are going to go on to compete for awards around the globe later in the year. An unwieldly action spectacle about the residents (Hwang Jung-min, Zo In-Sung, Ho-yeon, Lee Sang-hee, Im Hyun-sik) of a small South Korean mountainside town near the North Korean border called Hope Harbor banding together to fight a group of mysterious aliens that are already in the process of laying waste to their community when the movie begins being unveiled under these conditions is like somebody showing up to a black-tie event doing Edward 40 Hands. The disgust that came over some attendees upon discovering that a piece of unapologetic low art had somehow snuck into their prestigious party was felt in many of the negative reviews that followed its Cannes premiere, which subsequently helped it go down as one of the most polarizing titles to play at this year's festival. Unsurprisingly, its reception has been a bit better once it broke the containment of the hostile environment it debuted in, but it's still attracted some really harsh criticism from viewers that were expected something more refined from the guy who made The Wailing.  

To me, Hope is a leading example of how much the adrenaline of well-executed action and moments of levity can mask serious flaws within a movie. An ending sequel tease so shameless and silly that it could easily be read as a satirical shot at one of the worst trends in modern American movies and some clunky stretches where director Na does his best impression of telling an alien invasion story where the humans decided to do some half-assed sleuthing as to why these extraterrestrials have launched an attack on Earth before they go back to trying to vanquish them are just simply no match for sprawling chase/shootout sequences where it looks like the people performing the stunts could die at any moment and a scene where a side character describes his encounter with the aliens while battling severe diarrhea in the middle of the woods in great detail. 

The entire movie is kind of like if you took the cast of a South Korean take on a Coen Brothers movie like Fargo or Raising Arizona and inserted them into a Michael Bay-esque action movie where the main characters reveal themselves to be flying debris, explosions that can be seen from outer space and the biggest fucking guns humanity has ever created. If Cannes had a section dedicated to the joys of seeing bullets penetrate surfaces, perfect slow-motion usage and borderline unkillable aliens that run like cheetahs and have the strength of King Kong, Hope would've won in a landslide. This movie is catnip for anyone who starts shaking with excitement upon hearing that an action movie is chaotic, dumb and messy and I have no qualms with just how hard I ate up the big buffet of dumb maximalist madness that this madman Na hong-Jin put into the world. Thank you director Na for being such an ally to our community and it would be incredible if you were kind enough to feed all of us charlatans another delightful meal someday. 

Grade: B+

Nicole Kidman Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Nicole Kidman-whose latest project "Practical Magic 2" releases in theaters today. 

Nicole Kidman's Filmography Ranked:

25.Lion (D)

24.The Others (D+)

23.Practical Magic (D+)

22.The Beguiled (C-)

21.Secret in their Eyes (C)

20.The Paperboy (C)

19.A Family Affair (C)

18.Batman Forever (C+)

17.Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (B-)

16.Stoker (B-)

15.Dead Calm (B-)

14.Days of Thunder (B-)

13.Eyes Wide Shut (B-)

12.Just Go with It (B) 

11.Destroyer (B)

10.Bombshell (B)

9.Babygirl (B)

8.The Upside (B)

7.Being the Ricardos (B)

6.Paddington (B)

5.Aquaman (B+)

4.Rabbit Hole (B+)

3.The Northman (B+)

2.To Die For (B+)

1.The Killing of a Sacred Deer (B+)

Top Dog: The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017)

Even by the standards of notorious sicko Yorgos Lanthimos, The Killing of a Sacred Deer is going to be a tough sell for a lot of people. This is a BLEAK movie that goes to some dark places early on and only ventures further down a rabbit hole of despair and hopelessness as it progresses. This dedication to uncompromising darkness alongside the terrific performances from Colin Farrell, Kidman and Barry Keoghan are the main reasons why this deeply unnerving movie is very high on my list of favorite Lanthimos joints. 

Bottom Feeder: Lion (2016)

While I can't speak to how true to reality its fact-based story of an Indian man (Dev Patel) who mostly grew up in Australia returning to India with the hopes of finding the family he was accidently separated from when he was 5, Lion plays out in such a shamelessly melodramatic matter that I didn't buy an ounce of the wannabe feel good bullshit it was putting down. Disingenuous, faux sentimental bullshit like will never not piss me off and part of me is glad that the love Lion received during the 2016 awards season has largely dissipated with time. 

Most Underrated: Rabbit Hole (2010)

Rabbit Hole is a moving, raw and honest portrayal of grief and guilt that has really managed to fly completely under-the-radar since it was released 16 years ago. Kidman and Aaron Eckhart are stellar as a married couple that's struggling to maintain their relationship as they try to process the death of their 4-year-old son in a tragic accident and the really smart script from David Lindsay-Abair does a terrific job of delivering a sensitive, emotionally intelligent exploration of how this unfathomable loss is driving a wedge between them that may never be able to be repaired.

Most Overrated: The Others (2001)

The Others was one of those movies that I was too young to see when it came out but was old enough to process just how much buzz there was surrounding it at the time. By the time I finally got around to watching it in the spring of 2022, I was kind of taken aback by how I didn't like it. Outside of its gorgeous gothic haunted house aesthetics, nothing about this movie impressed me in the slightest. The pacing is brutal, the performances are merely alright, and the really silly twist ending manages to further unravel an already pretty weak story.