Bill Skarsgard Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Bill Skarsgard-whose latest project "Nosferatu" releases in theaters on Christmas Day. 

Bill Skarsgard's Filmography Ranked:

14.It: Chapter Two (C-)

13.Allegiant (C+)

12.Boy Kills World (B-)

11.Assassination Nation (B-)

10.The Crow (B-)

9.Villains (B)

8.The Devil All the Time (B)

7.Nine Days (B)

6.Barbarian (B)

5.It (B)

4.Eternals (B+)

3.Atomic Blonde (B+)

2.Deadpool 2 (B+)

1.John Wick: Chapter 4 (A)

Top Dog: John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023)

The only real problem with John Wick: Chapter 4 is that Lionsgate is probably going to feel compelled to continue Wick's story given that it's arguably the most valuable IP in their library and they're desperate for moneymakers at the moment. But for now, John Wick: Chapter 4 is a perfect conclusion to Wick's character arc and one of the most essential pieces of action cinema I've ever laid my eyes on. 

Bottom Feeder: It: Chapter Two (2019)

Even 5+ years after it hit theaters, it remains an absolute mystery to me how the same behind-the-camera creative team behind It and a gifted ensemble led by James McAvoy, Jessica Chastian and Bill Hader managed to drop the ball so hard on the sequel. The attempts at building an ominous atmosphere are regularly broken up by ill-times needle drops and comedic moments, the entire primary cast save for Hader looks completely lost in trying to the play the adult versions of the characters we met in the first installment and quite frankly, there's just a lot of goofy plot developments that ensure that the story is considerably weaker than the first installment. If it weren't for Skarsgard once again shining as Pennywise and a couple of great setpieces (the scene under the bleachers and the hall of mirrors scene), this would've been a complete disaster.  

Most Underrated: Eternals (2021)

While the puzzling choice to introduce a team of heroes that have been alive for centuries and have complicated relationships with each other, mortality and Earth in a 2.5-hour movie opposed to a 6+ hour series makes the narrative unwieldy at times, Eternals remains one of the MCU's most unique and ambitious movies. Academy Award Winner Chloe Zhao is able to bring her grounded, humanist sensibilities to the world of blockbusters by rooting this story in character above anything else and having these complex dynamics inform all of the love, destruction, death, etc. that takes place in the story gives Eternals the type of sincere emotional core that aren't typically found in Kevin Feige productions that weren't helmed by James Gunn. Plus, the action beats are really cool and Zhao's choice to shoot primarily on location ensures that it's the best-looking Marvel movie ever released.         

Most Overrated: None

Skarsgard's age (34), the sizable volume of little-seen indie projects in his filmography and my positive feelings towards projects like John Wick: Chapter 4, Barbarian and Deadpool 2 were enough to ensure that he didn't have a film appear in this section.  

Most Overhated: The Crow (2024)

As we approach the end of 2024, I feel pretty confident in saying The Crow will be my selection for the year's most overhated movie. While it absolutely would've benefitted from a sharper script and a character design for Eric Draven/The Crow that didn't look like the spiritual successor to Jared Leto's Joker from Suicide Squad, remixing this story to be a supernatural tragic romance revenge actioner mostly works. Skarsgard and FKA twigs have an easygoing chemistry that feels true to their characters, Rupert Sanders' direction is pretty stylish and the big opera house setpiece is an awesome, gory delight that is easily among the best action sequences of the year.      

James Marsden Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of James Marsden-whose latest project "Sonic the Hedgehog 3" releases in theaters today. 

James Marsden's Filmography Ranked:

22.Hop (D-)

21.Straw Dogs (D)

20.Sugar & Spice (D+)

19.Superman Returns (C-)

18.Unfrosted (C)

17.Welcome to Me (C)

16.The Notebook (C)

15.Unfinished Business (C+)

14.The Butler (C+)

13.Bachelorette (B-) 

12.Sex Drive (B-)

11.X-Men: The Last Stand (B-)

10.Knox Goes Away (B-)

9.X-Men (B)

8.Death at a Funeral (B)

7.2 Guns (B)

6.Sonic the Hedgehog (B)

5.Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (B)

4.Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (B+)

3.X2 (A-)

2.X-Men: Days of Future Past (A)

1.Zoolander (A)

Top Dog: Zoolander (2001)

While Tropic Thunder and The Secret Life of Walter Mitty are great movies, I think Zoolander is Ben Stiller's finest hour as a writer/director. A satire about the modeling industry makes for an incredible breeding ground for absurdist comedy and the bits that Stiller came up with are frequently uproarious, (the gas station scene is among the hardest I've ever laughed at anything in my life) if not borderline comic genius.        

Bottom Feeder: Hop (2011)

A grating, brutally unfunny family movie that also happens to feature Russell Brand as the voice of the Easter Bunny. We need to shoot this cursed text into the sun ASAP.   

Most Underrated: Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013)

Is it as good as the first one? No, but there's only 2 or 3 comedies that I find to be funnier than Anchorman, so it would be absurdly unfair to expect it to be on that level. What Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues does do is deliver another weird, stupid and demented round of absurdist comedy hijinks from a collection of actors (Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Paul Rudd, Steve Carrell, David Koechner, Fred Willard) that work really well together.   

Most Overrated: The Notebook (2004)

Despite their best efforts, the terrific chemistry between Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams is ultimately no match for the cringey cheeseball romance power of Nicolas Sparks' source material. The manipulative tearjerker energy in this thing could power all of Earth for the next 10,000 years.      

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 16

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(3) Philadelphia Eagles (12-2) Week 16 opponent: Washington Commanders

2.(2) Kansas City Chiefs (13-1) Week 16 opponent: Houston Texans

3.(4) Buffalo Bills (11-3) Week 16 opponent: New England Patriots

4.(1) Detroit Lions (12-2) Week 16 opponent: Chicago Bears

5.(5) Minnesota Vikings (12-2) Week 16 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

6.(7) Green Bay Packers (11-3) Week 16 opponent: New Orleans Saints

7.(6) Pittsburgh Steelers (10-4) Week 16 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

8.(8) Baltimore Ravens (9-5) Week 16 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

9.(10) Denver Broncos (9-5) Week 16 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

10.(11) Washington Commanders (9-5) Week 16 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

11.(12) Houston Texans (9-5) Week 16 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs

12.(14) Los Angeles Rams (8-6) Week 16 opponent: New York Jets

13.(15) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (8-6) Week 16 opponent:  Dallas Cowboys

14.(9) Los Angeles Chargers (8-6) Week 16 opponent: Denver Broncos

15.(13) Seattle Seahawks (8-6) Week 16 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

16.(17) Arizona Cardinals (7-7) Week 16 opponent: Carolina Panthers

17.(16) Miami Dolphins (6-8) Week 16 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

18.(20) Cincinnati Bengals (6-8) Week 16 opponent: Cleveland Browns

19.(21) Dallas Cowboys (6-8) Week 16 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

20.(18) San Francisco 49ers (6-8) Week 16 opponent: Miami Dolphins

21.(22) Atlanta Falcons (6-8) Week 16 opponent: New York Giants

22.(19) Indianapolis Colts (6-8) Week 16 opponent: Tennessee Titans

23.(25) New York Jets (4-10) Week 16 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

24.(23) New Orleans Saints (5-9) Week 16 opponent: Green Bay Packers

25.(24) Carolina Panthers (3-11) Week 16 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

26.(26) Cleveland Browns (3-11) Week 16 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

27.(27) Chicago Bears (4-10) Week 16 opponent: Detroit Lions

28.(28) Jacksonville Jaguars (3-11) Week 16 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

29.(29) New England Patriots (3-11) Week 16 opponent: Buffalo Bills

30.(30) Tennessee Titans (3-11) Week 16 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

31.(31) Las Vegas Raiders (2-12) Week 16 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

32.(32) New York Giants (2-12) Week 16 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

Week 15 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Josh Allen (Bills)

While not quite at the historic levels of his Week 14 performance in LA, Allen spun another all-around gem in a shootout win versus the Lions-throwing for 362 YDS and 2 TD's and rushing for 68 YDS and 2 TD's. Allen will have a really good chance to stretch his 4+ TD streak to 4 games when the Bills return to Orchard Park to take on the ghastly Patriots on Sunday afternoon.  

Honorable Mentions: Jared Goff (Lions), Lamar Jackson (Ravens), Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers)

LVP: Brock Purdy (49ers)

Sloppy conditions in Santa Clara and poor performances from everybody else on the offense not named George Kittle led to Purdy having one of the worst games of his career (142 YDS, 0 TD's, INT, 3 rushing YDS) in a gut-wrenching loss to the Rams last Thursday night. Purdy will be a questionable starting option for his Week 16 showdown with the Dolphins.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Tua Tagovailoa (Dolphins), Kyler Murray (Cardinals), C.J. Stroud (Texans)

Running Back

MVP: James Conner (Cardinals)

Conner rolled in a soft matchup versus the Patriots, registering 138 scrimmage YDS on 21 touches (16 carries, 5 receptions) in an easy win for the Cardinals that snapped their 3-game losing skid coming off their Week 11 bye. The steady veteran leader of the Cards backfield committee has another good matchup this week against the Panthers bottom-ranked run defense.    

Honorable Mentions: Jahmyr Gibbs (Lions), James Cook (Bills), Chase Brown (Bengals)

LVP: Najee Harris (Steelers)

It was a really rough day at the office for Harris as the Eagles stout front and lethal ball control offense rendered him damn near useless as he got just 21 YDS on his 7 touches (6 carries, 1 reception) in a deflating loss for the AFC North leaders. Harris' day actually could've been worse if the pitch from Russell Wilson that he failed to corral counted as a fumble for him. He'll hope for a much better, busier day on Sunday against a Ravens squad that he picked up 93 YDS against in their prior meeting this season. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Javonte Williams (Broncos), Derrick Henry (Ravens), Chuba Hubbard (Panthers)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Davante Adams (Jets)

It happened at least 6 weeks too late, but Adams has finally had his 1st signature moment as a Jet. The embattled star wideout looked like the All-Pro version of himself that we haven't see much over the past 2 seasons as he carved up the Jaguars for 9/198/1 and a successful 2-PT CNV reception. He'll almost certainly revert back to his mortal 32-year-old present day self against the Rams in Week 16.  

Honorable Mentions: Mike Evans (Buccaneers), Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions), Brian Thomas Jr. (Jaguars)

LVP: Amari Cooper (Bills)

To say that Cooper wasn't involved in Josh Allen's monster day in Detroit would somehow be an understatement. The newest Bills wideout didn't even register a target as Allen primarily favored Ty Johnson, Khalil Shakir and Dalton Kincaid in the passing game on this particular day. Cooper will look to redeem himself against the suspect Patriots secondary in Week 16.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Cooper Kupp (Rams), Marvin Harrison Jr. (Cardinals), Tyreek Hill (Dolphins)

Tight End

MVP: Jonnu Smith (Dolphins)

Tyreek Hill and Tua Tagaovailoa's failed connections downfield that led to 3 picks and Jaylen Waddle's early exit with a knee injury opened the doors for Smith to become a checkdown magnet against the Texans and he delivered in a big way with the type of line (9/48/1) that PPR players dream of for their pass-catchers-especially at the TE position. Smith's status as a late-emerging 2024 fantasy star will be tested in a big way this week when the Dolphins take on a 49ers defense that has been tough against tight ends all season long.    

Honorable Mentions: Sam LaPorta (Lions), Trey McBride (Cardinals), Pat Freiermuth (Steelers)

LVP: Jake Ferguson (Cowboys)

For a 2nd straight week, Ferguson failed to take advantage of a terrific matchup by hauling in just 2 grabs for 23 YDS against the Panthers on Sunday. He'll look to avoid making it 3 underperformances in plus matchups in a row when the Cowboys take on the Bucs in Week 16.

Dishonorable Mentions: Travis Kelce (Chiefs), Cade Otton (Buccaneers), Brock Bowers (Raiders)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Chiefs

Nothing can stop a defensive slump quite like a day where Jameis Winston's worst gunslinger tendencies are on full display. The Chiefs were able to muster a ridiculous 5 sacks and 6 takeaways (4 INT's, 2 FUM REC's) in their 21-7 victory over the Browns. They even forced Winston out of the game early in the 4th quarter and earned their final pick of the day against his replacement Dorian Thompson-Robinson! A struggling but generally turnover-averse Texans offense is up next for the Chiefs.   

Honorable Mentions: Broncos, Packers, Texans

LVP: Lions

The wheels finally came all the way off for the Lions defense against the Bills after weeks of poor play largely brought on their increasingly large share of injured starters on that side of the ball. Aaron Glenn's group surrendered a whopping 48 points, got 0 sacks or takeaways and lost another 3 starters over this hellish 60 minutes of football. Even with their certified hospital status at all 3 levels, they'll be worth trotting out as a starter for their Week 16 matchup with the Bears limp, aloof offense.          

Dishonorable Mentions: Bills, Chargers, 49ers 

Movie Review: Kraven the Hunter

These days, we need all the good news we can get to help us get through another miserable day on this dying cesspool of a planet known as Earth. Variety provided one of these essential blessed deliveries late this past Friday evening when they reported that despite rumors to the contrary, Sony's maligned and largely commercially unsuccessful Spider-Man villanverse (this isn't the official name, it's just what I'm electing to call it at the moment) would NOT be ending with Kraven the Hunter. Reading this headline early Saturday morning may've been the happiest I was all of last week. When you have something as beautiful as the SMVV on your hands, it would be a travesty to put it out to pasture over a trivial thing like tens of millions in losses for Sony and poor audience reception.

So why am I legitimately thrilled by this news? Simple: The SMVV represents the rebirth of the pre-MCU superhero movies that dominated the 2000's. It was a simpler time where the genre wasn't micromanaged or homogenized in the slightest. Nobody gave a shit about shared universes, sequel teases or even basic continuity. If anything, it felt like there was some kind of Kevin Feige-esque overlord mandating that the product on screen was as dumb and disjointed as possible. While these movies weren't great by any stretch, there was a real charm to their shortcomings that makes most of them at least kind of fun to watch.

Kraven the Hunter is able to continue this old, proud tradition that the SMVV has revitalized. What makes J.C. Chandor's long delayed origin story for the tight vest-clad land animal answer to Aquaman played by Aaron Taylor-Johnson uniquely charming is that it's the first of these films to carry an R-rating. The freedom to say/do whatever the hell they want gives Kraven a real Punisher: War Zone vibe as its cornball family soap opera meets zany crime thriller plot gets spiced up with semi-regular interludes of finely staged bloody violence. Watching overqualified actors (Taylor-Johnson, Russell Crowe, Fred Hechinger, Ariana DeBose, Christopher Abbott, Alessandro Nivola-who kind of runs away with the movie with his cartoonish weirdo dweeb take on the classic-ish Spider-Man villain The Rhino) overact their way through a nonsensical story that doesn't seem overly invested in anything other than finding a way to loosely tie its collection of mismatched characters together just hits a little bit harder when the character's use salty language and can slit somebody's throat at a moment's notice. Honestly, if there were more scenes like the Russian prison-set cold open, the foot/car chase scene through the streets of London and the climactic forest fight, this probably could've hit the same level of debased schlocky fun as the aforementioned War Zone instead of the mildly entertaining blast of unwieldy cheese this it manages to be for most of its running time.   

Look, I understand that a lot of people won't be able to find the fun in Kraven the Hunter like I did. It's an exceptionally silly, comically unfocused movie that's not "good" in any traditional sense. I just refuse to come out and shit all over a movie that takes so much pleasure in being ridiculous. Even if Sony follows through on their promise to continue this particular universe, this brand of superhero movie is almost certainly on its last legs as audiences continue to become fickler with which entries in this genre they venture out to the theaters to see, so I'm just going to enjoy watching a minor triumph in bonehead cinema like Kraven before its kind goes completely extinct.                             

Grade: B-

Jason Bateman Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Jason Bateman-whose latest project "Carry-On" debuts on Netflix tomorrow. 

Jason Bateman's Filmography Ranked:

28.Fool's Paradise (D)

27.This is Where I Leave You (D)

26.Identity Thief (D)

25.Juno (D)

24.The Change-Up (C-)

23.The Sweetest Thing (C-)

22.The Break-Up (C-)

21.The Switch (C)

20.Zootopia (C)

19.Thunder Force (C+)

18.State of Play (C+)

17.Office Christmas Party (B-)

16.Hit and Run (B-)

15.The Kingdom (B)

14.Hancock (B)

13.Bad Words (B)

12.Horrible Bosses 2 (B)

11.Extract (B)

10.Starsky & Hutch (B)

9.Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (B)

8.The Gift (B)

7.Up in the Air (B)

6.Central Intelligence (B+)

5.Paul (B+)

4.Air (B+)

3.Horrible Bosses (A-)

2.Smokin' Aces (A)

1.Game Night (A)

Top Dog: Game Night (2018)

Game Night isn't just arguably the best studio comedy of the 2010's, it's one of the best studio comedies of the 21st century period. The perfectly matched ensemble (Bateman, Rachel McAdams, Kyle Chandler, Jesse Plemons, Billy Magnussen, Lamorne Morris, Sharon Horgan, Kylie Bunbury) is on fire from start to finish, the direction from John Frances Daley and Jonathan Goldstein is super lively and stylish and the script's thriller/mystery undertones are expertly deployed to complement and heighten the comedy of the insane situation the characters find themselves in.   

Bottom Feeder: Fool's Paradise (2023)

As a big fan of Charlie Day, I'm still stunned by just how bad Fool's Paradise is. You could easily talk about how it doesn't work as a showbiz satire or Chaplin-esque slapstick piece, but the most succinct way to sum up its head-scratching failure is that it's simply not very funny. The only signs of comedic life in the whole damn movie come from Common and Glenn Howerton and neither of them are in it for long enough to meaningfully salvage this sinking ship. Hopefully Day gets another crack at directing someday because I still believe that he's capable of making a really great comedy.     

Most Underrated: Smokin' Aces (2007)

This is going to sound made-up, but I promise it's true: I walked out of the theater after seeing Smokin' Aces in January 2007 (I was 14 going on 15 at the time) believing that I'd seen one of the greatest movies ever made. At 32 going on 33, I'm not quite as high on Smokin' Aces but I still believe it's a special movie. Joe Caranahan effectively operates as a white trash Tarantino as he builds this manic, booze-and-cocaine-fueled world of assassins, sleazy magicians and sleazier law enforcement officials, which results in an exercise in vulgar excess that is exhausting and exhilarating in equal measure. It should be preserved in the Library of Congress ASAP.            

Most Overrated: Zootopia (2016)

This really just comes down to me not connecting with Zootopia in the slightest. The characters are kind of dull, the humor is inconsistent and the racism allegory that drives the plot is lacking anything beyond surface level resonance. We'll see if next year's Zootopia 2 will be able to sway me more towards side of the 'Topia faithful.     

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 15

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Detroit Lions (12-1) Week 15 opponent: Buffalo Bills 

2.(3) Kansas City Chiefs (12-1) Week 15 opponent: Cleveland Browns

3.(4) Philadelphia Eagles (11-2) Week 15 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

4.(2) Buffalo Bills (10-3) Week 15 opponent: Detroit Lions

5.(6) Minnesota Vikings (11-2) Week 15 opponent: Chicago Bears

6.(7) Pittsburgh Steelers (10-3) Week 15 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

7.(5) Green Bay Packers (9-4) Week 15 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

8.(8) Baltimore Ravens (8-5) Week 15 opponent: New York Giants

9.(9) Los Angeles Chargers (8-5) Week 15 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

10.(10) Denver Broncos (8-5) Week 15 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

11.(11) Washington Commanders (8-5) Week 15 opponent: New Orleans Saints

12.(12) Houston Texans (8-5) Week 15 opponent: Miami Dolphins

13.(13) Seattle Seahawks (8-5) Week 15 opponent: Green Bay Packers

14.(15) Los Angeles Rams (7-6) Week 15 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

15.(16) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (7-6) Week 15 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

16.(17) Miami Dolphins (6-7) Week 15 opponent: Houston Texans

17.(14) Arizona Cardinals (6-7) Week 15 opponent: New England Patriots

18.(21) San Francisco 49ers (6-7) Week 15 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

19.(19) Indianapolis Colts (6-7) Week 15 opponent: Denver Broncos

20.(22) Cincinnati Bengals (5-8) Week 15 opponent: Tennessee Titans 

21.(20) Dallas Cowboys (5-8) Week 15 opponent: Carolina Panthers

22.(18) Atlanta Falcons (6-7) Week 15 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

23.(23) New Orleans Saints (5-8) Week 15 opponent: Washington Commanders

24.(27) Carolina Panthers (3-10) Week 15 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

25.(26) New York Jets (3-10) Week 15 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars

26.(25) Cleveland Browns (3-10) Week 15 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs

27.(24) Chicago Bears (4-9) Week 15 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

28.(31) Jacksonville Jaguars (3-10) Week 15 opponent: New York Jets

29.(29) New England Patriots (3-10) Week 15 opponent; Arizona Cardinals

30.(28) Tennessee Titans (3-10) Week 15 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

31.(30) Las Vegas Raiders (2-11) Week 15 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

32.(32) New York Giants (2-11) Week 15 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

Week 14 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Josh Allen (Bills)

Allen's bonkers, history-making performance (342 passing YDS, 82 rushing YDS, 3 passing AND rushing TD's) in a thrilling shootout loss to the Rams swayed the outcome of many games on this final weekend of the regular season in most 12+ team leagues. The Bills star has emerged as the new MVP favorite after this awe-inspiring outing and if he keeps this level of play up over the next 3 weeks, he'll be the frontrunner for fantasy MVP favorite as well.     

Honorable Mentions: Sam Darnold (Vikings), Joe Burrow (Bengals), Jalen Hurts (Eagles)

LVP: Justin Herbert (Chargers)

Without top WR Ladd McConkey in the lineup, Herbert was mostly held in check against the Chiefs on Sunday night-throwing for 213 YDS and a TD while adding 12 YDS on 4 carries. He should be much more productive this week against a horrid Bucs secondary that has surrendered the most fantasy points to QB's this season.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Caleb Williams (Bears), Patrick Mahomes (Chiefs), Jordan Love (Packers)

Running Back

MVP: Zach Charbonnet (Seahawks)

Anybody that was lucky enough to have arguably the most popular RB handcuff in fantasy right now got to really revel in their good fortune this week as Charbonnet flourished in the Seahawks RB1 role, turning his 29 touches (22 carries, 7 receptions) into 193 YDS and a pair of scores. Mike Macdonald said during his press conference yesterday that Kenneth Walker III is set to undergo more testing on his injured calf, which naturally puts his status to suit up on Sunday night against in the Packers in real jeopardy. If Charbonnet does indeed start again, he'll be on the RB1/RB2 borderline against Green Bay's middling run defense.     

Honorable Mentions: Isaac Guerendo (49ers), Josh Jacobs (Packers), Rachaad White (Buccaneers)

LVP: James Cook (Bills)

The deep hole that the Bills dug for themselves in the first half versus the Rams that opened the door for Josh Allen's historic performance turned Cook into an afterthought on the Bills offense, finishing the day with 29 YDS on just 8 touches (6 carries, 2 receptions). Cook could be in for another unusually quiet day in Week 15 when the Bills square off against the Lions stout run D.     

Dishonorable Mentions: D'Andre Swift (Bears), Nick Chubb (Browns), Kareem Hunt (Chiefs)

Wide Receiver 

MVP: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

Chase's quest for an All-Pro appearance amidst a lost season for the Bengals continues to be mighty successful. His latest overmatched foe was the Cowboys corner group, who allowed him to haul in a whopping 14 catches for 177 YDS and 2 TD's. He also added a 14-YD rush to further pump up his absurd statline. The overall fantasy WR1 has a date with the Titans top-ranked pass defense next.   

Honorable Mentions: Puka Nacua (Rams), Jordan Addison (Vikings), Justin Jefferson (Vikings)

LVP: Jayden Reed (Packers)

After remarkably avoiding it through 12 games of his feast-or-famine sophomore campaign, Reed finally put up a goose egg against the Lions. Jordan Love looked his way just once on a night where Christian Watson, Tucker Kraft and Dontayvion Wicks were responsible for all but 2 of the receiving YDS. Reed will look to return to the explosive end of his wildly erratic playing spectrum against the Seahawks on Sunday night.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Tee Higgins (Bengals), Keenan Allen (Bears), Deebo Samuel (49ers)

Tight End

MVP: George Kittle (49ers)

While he was held out of the endzone, Kittle led the 49ers in receiving by a wide margin (6 REC/151 YDS) in their commanding win over the Bears. He should be a strong TE1 play for this week's crucial divisional showdown with the Rams.  

Honorable Mentions: Pat Freiermuth (Steelers), Jonnu Smith (Dolphins), David Njoku (Browns)

LVP: Kyle Pitts (Falcons)

While the perpetually infuriating Falcons TE was on the receiving end of 6 targets against the Vikings, he only ended up with a lone reception for 14 YDS. A Week 15 matchup with an incredibly soft Raiders defense will be a do-or-die spot for his TE1 status the rest of the way.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Cole Kmet (Bears), Jake Ferguson (Cowboys), Evan Engram (Jaguars)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: 49ers

Unlike their showdown with the Bills in Week 13, the absence of Nick Bosa didn't prevent the 49ers defense from having a great performance. In fact, they had easily one of their finest showings of 2024, stacking up 7 sacks and a fumble recovery on a stagnant Bears offense in a 38-13 victory. They'll be a potentially shaky play for Thursday night's contest with the Rams.  

Honorable Mentions: Buccaneers, Steelers, Saints

LVP: Bills

The Bills defense was shockingly awful against the Rams, getting shredded for 44 points while failing to register a single sack or takeaway. Starting them against the Lions powerhouse offense this week after a performance like this feels like a bad idea.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Dolphins, Eagles, Lions

Movie Review: Y2K

 

There's no denying that the presence of sketchy small town video stores, AIM and nu metal icon Fred Durst adds to the nostalgic aesthetic of Kyle Mooney's absurdist disaster horror comedy Y2K-which envisions an alternate world where the fears over the "Y2K bug" actually materialized and all of the computers in the world banded together to exterminate the human race at midnight on January 1, 2000. But what really sells the authenticity of its throwback to the late 90's/early 00's is how it mixes broad comedy with absurdly over-the-top genre elements. Specifically, Y2K hits a lot of the same messily charming notes of the 1999 cult hit Idle Hands as it primarily focuses on a group of teens (Jaeden Martell, Rachel Zegler, Julian Dennison, Lachlan Watson, Daniel Zolghadri) from different cliques fighting to survive after escaping a New Year's Eve party that ended with many of their peers getting slaughtered by the technology that was in the house.

The frequent shifts from lighthearted buddy movie to goofy stoner comedy to teen romance to full-blown splatterfest will likely alienate the shit out of most audiences who aren't familiar with the pop culture of the period. Those that have read and embraced the sacred texts of this era where teen B-movies had inconsistent tones and high body counts will probably find at least something to like here. Mooney dives headfirst into the rough absurdity of this venture by creating many punchlines that are delightfully idiotic and relevant to the time period while also manufacturing moments of earnest emotion practically out of thin air. There's a real risk of something that's so rooted in a specific moment of time becoming an exhausting joke that overstays its welcome, but Mooney avoids that by keeping the runtime tight (91 minutes!) and concocting a killer final act that is anchored by a hilarious, scene-stealing turn from Durst himself. 

At a time of year where cinema is dominated by serious awards fare, it was cool to watch something so shaggy and silly on the big screen. While I'm not confident it will go onto develop a true cult following, there's no doubt in my mind that some high school kids in the future will watch this shit at 2 AM (quite possibly under the influence of reefer) and think it's the funniest movie they've ever seen. In my eyes, this means Mooney and the gen-Z leaders of his cast -who all do an admirable job of pretending they understand the unique pain of waiting for the dial-up internet to boot up-accomplished what they set out to do with Y2K.                                  

Grade: B

Scoot McNairy Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Scoot McNairy-whose latest project "Nightbitch" is in select theaters now.

Scoot McNairy's Filmography Ranked:

17.The Rover (D-)

16.Killing Them Softly (C-)

15.Luckiest Girl Alive (C)

14.Monsters (C)

13.The Legacy of a Whitetail Deer Hunter (B-)

12.Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (B-)

11.Our Brand is Crisis (B-)

10.Sleepless (B-)

9.Destroyer (B)

8.Speak No Evil (B)

7.12 Years a Slave (B)

6.C'mon C'mon (B+)

5.Non-Stop (B+)

4.Argo (B+)

3.A Quiet Place: Part II (B+)

2.Once Upon a Time in Hollywood... (A)

1.Gone Girl (A)

Top Dog: Gone Girl (2014)

If Gone Girl does indeed prove to be the last pure theatrical release of David Fincher's career, at least he went out with a bang. The Gillian Flynn-penned mystery thriller simultaneously manages to be a masterful deconstruction of a failed marriage, darkly comedic takedown of modern sensationalist media and twisty, wildly compelling procedural. Rosamund Pike burns up the screen with her layered, powerhouse performance as Amy Dunne-the daughter of a famous author who goes missing on the day of her fifth wedding anniversary while Ben Affleck shines almost as brightly as a cold, smug prick whose accused of being behind the disappearance of his estranged wife. Throw in an incredible supporting cast (Carrie Coon, Tyler Perry, Neil Patrick Harris, Kim Dickens, Emily Ratajkowski, Casey Wilson, Missi Pyle) and Fincher's reliably terrific visual eye and you have a real masterpiece on your hands.     

Bottom Feeder: The Rover (2016)

The scene where Robert Pattinson's character jams out to "Pretty Girl Rock" in the car is hilarious. Other than that, The Rover is a remarkably dour and dull dystopian tale that is well beneath the talent level of its director David Michod.     

Most Underrated: Non-Stop (2014)

Ah yes, the good old days of the mid-2010's where Liam Nesson was still ripping out really fun action movies on a regular basis. Non-Stop is a borderline perfect propulsive B-thriller that makes great use of its confined setting (an airplane that's mid-flight) to build suspense, has a cast of consummate pros (Julianne Moore, Michelle Dockery, McNairy, Lupita Ny'ongo, Nate Parker, Corey Stoll, Anson Mount) that are happy to ride the silliness wave of its twist-happy story and ends with an awesome, chaotic setpiece that Jaume Collet-Serra directs the hell out of. Check it out on Netflix before Collet-Serra's next airplane-based action thriller Carry-On drops on the platform next Friday.         

Most Overrated: 12 Years a Slave (2013)

At its best, 12 Years a Slave is a stirring portrayal of the horrors of slavery and Solomon Northup's harrowing, infuriating journey from free man to slave and back again. At its worst, it's shamelessly melodramatic awards bait. The prevalence of the latter, particularly in the final third of the film when Michael Fassbender's Edwin Epps becomes a regular fixture on screen, is why I've long felt 12 Years a Slave is a good but not great film that fails to live up to its Best Picture Winner pedigree.  

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 14

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Detroit Lions (11-1) Week 14 opponent: Green Bay Packers

2.(2) Buffalo Bills (10-2) Week 14 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

3.(3) Kansas City Chiefs (11-1) Week 14 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

4.(5) Philadelphia Eagles (10-2) Week 14 opponent: Carolina Panthers

5.(4) Green Bay Packers (9-3) Week 14 opponent: Detroit Lions

6.(6) Minnesota Vikings (10-2) Week 14 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

7.(8) Pittsburgh Steelers (9-3) Week 14 opponent: Cleveland Browns

8.(7) Baltimore Ravens (8-5) Week 14 opponent: Bye

9.(9) Los Angeles Chargers (8-4) Week 14 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

10.(10) Denver Broncos (8-5) Week 14 opponent: Bye

11.(11) Washington Commanders (8-5) Week 14 opponent: Bye

12.(12) Houston Texans (8-5) Week 14 opponent: Bye

13.(15) Seattle Seahawks (7-5) Week 14 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

14.(13) Arizona Cardinals (6-6) Week 14 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

15.(18) Los Angeles Rams (6-6) Week 14 opponent: Buffalo Bills

16.(17) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (6-6) Week 14 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

17.(14) Miami Dolphins (5-7) Week 14 opponent: New York Jets

18.(16) Atlanta Falcons (6-6) Week 14 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

19.(21) Indianapolis Colts (6-7) Week 14 opponent: Bye

20.(24) Dallas Cowboys (5-7) Week 14 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

21.(19) San Francisco 49ers (5-7) Week 14 opponent: Chicago Bears

22.(20) Cincinnati Bengals (4-8) Week 14 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

23.(22) New Orleans Saints (4-8) Week 14 opponent: New York Giants

24.(23) Chicago Bears (4-8) Week 14 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

25.(26) Cleveland Browns (3-9) Week 14 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

26.(25) New York Jets (3-9) Week 14 opponent: Miami Dolphins

27.(27) Carolina Panthers (3-9) Week 14 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

28.(28) Tennessee Titans (3-9) Week 14 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars

29.(29) New England Patriots (3-10) Week 14 opponent: Bye

30.(30) Las Vegas Raiders (2-10) Week 14 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

31.(31) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-10) Week 14 opponent: Tennessee Titans 

32.(32) New York Giants (2-10) Week 14 opponent: New Orleans Saints

Week 13 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Jayden Daniels (Commanders)

Daniels returns to this spot for the 2nd straight week, only this time it came in a decisive Commanders victory and not a head-spinning loss. The rookie signalcaller punished the Titans for the slew of mistakes they made on both sides of the ball, amassing 206 YDS and 3 TD's through the air and 34 YDS and a TD on the ground. He also threw another pick-his 4th in the last 3 games, but that clearly didn't put much of a damper on his big day. Daniels goes into his Week 14 bye as the overall fantasy QB2 behind Lamar Jackson, but he may have a hard time holding onto a top 5 spot down the stretch with Josh Allen, Joe Burrow, Jalen Hurts and Baker Mayfield all within striking distance of his point total.  

Honorable Mentions: Josh Allen (Bills), Lamar Jackson (Ravens), Tua Tagovailoa (Dolphins)

LVP: Brock Purdy (49ers)

Purdy's return to action after a 1-week absence couldn't have gone any worse as the whipping lake effect snow in Orchard Park and a hungry Bills team caused him to be a complete non-factor (94 YDS, 4 Rushing YDS, 0 TD, lost fumble). He'll undoubtedly be thrilled to return to the warm climate of Santa Clara this week to take on the Bears.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Justin Herbert (Chargers), Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers), C.J. Stroud (Texans)

Running Back

MVP: Bucky Irving (Buccaneers)

On a day where Baker Mayfield wasn't at all sharp, the Bucs offense relied heavily on Irving to make plays, and he delivered in a big way. The rookie back went absolutely ballistic against the Panthers porous defense, picking up 152 YDS and a score on his 25 carries. He also added another 33 YDS from his 3 receptions on the day. Irving has been kind of a revelation of late for the Bucs offense as he's been the primary reason their rushing attack has gone from the worst in the league a year ago to #8 overall this year. He'll be a strong RB2 for their Week 14 tilt with the Raiders. 

Honorable Mentions: Bijan Robinson (Falcons), Najee Harris (Steelers), Joe Mixon (Texans)

LVP: Chuba Hubbard (Panthers)

It was a miserable day at the office for Hubbard against the Bucs as he not only gained just 43 YDS on 12 carries, wasn't targeted in the passing game at all and lost a fumble that led to the Bucs kicking the game-winning field goal in OT but ceded a fair number of snaps to rookie Jonathon Brooks. Question marks over his role moving forward paired with a tough matchup versus the Eagles make him a strong bench candidate in Week 14.

Dishonorable Mentions: Kenneth Walker III (Seahawks), Breece Hall (Jets), Tony Pollard (Titans)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Jerry Jeudy (Browns)

Never doubt the power of revenge. Jeudy had one of the most improbable fantasy explosions in recent memory by putting together easily the best game of his career (9 REC/235 YDS/TD/2 PT-CNV) against the Broncos-who traded him to the Browns back in March. While he obviously won't replicate this performance again, Jeudy has really hit his stride since Jameis Winston became the Browns starting quarterback in Week 8-averaging 6.6 receptions and 122.8 YDS per game over that period. He'll be on the WR2/3 borderline for this week's contest with the Steelers  

Honorable Mentions: Terry McLaurin (Commanders), Keenan Allen (Bears), Mike Evans (Buccaneers)

LVP: Tank Dell (Texans)

Dell putting together his quietest game (1 REC/23 YDS/4 TGTS) in over a month against the Jaguars putrid secondary is a bit of a head-scratcher, especially given how much C.J. Stroud had been looking his way in recent weeks (an average of 7.5 times per game over the previous 4 weeks). Following the Texans Week 14 bye, Dell's up-and-down 2024 campaign will close out with the appropriately boom-or-bust matchup trio of the Vikings, Chiefs and Ravens during the fantasy playoffs. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Deebo Samuel (49ers), Amari Cooper (Bills), Cooper Kupp (Rams)

Tight End

MVP: Brock Bowers (Raiders)

Bowers got to show the whole world how great of a season he's having for a wretched Raiders team when he absolutely torched the Chiefs defense (10 REC/140 YDS/TD, 1 CAR/2 YDS) during Amazon's Black Friday game. The University of Georgia product has delivered huge value for his fantasy managers as an 8th or 9th round pick in most leagues as he is currently on track to be the overall TE1 for 2024. The Bucs are the next team that have the misfortune of going against him.   

Honorable Mentions: David Njoku (Browns), Jonnu Smith (Dolphins), Mark Andrews (Ravens)

LVP: Kyle Pitts (Falcons)

Kirk Cousins suddenly looking old as hell and Bijan Robinson earning even more touches than he was getting a month ago is not a good recipe for Pitts. The famously erratic Falcons tight end put up his second donut of 2024 versus the Chargers on Sunday afternoon and was targeted just 2 times on a day where only Drake London and Ray-Ray McCloud could get on the same page as Cousins. Since his 4/91/2 eruption against the Bucs in Week 8, Pitts has just 1 multi-catch game and 0 TD's. Start him at your own peril against the Vikings in Week 14.  

Dishonorable Mentions: George Kittle (49ers), T.J. Hockenson (Vikings), Cade Otton (Buccaneers)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Broncos

The Broncos usually stout defense was pretty awful last night against the Browns, surrendering 552 YDS of total offense and 32 points. So how did they end in the MVP column? Jameis F'n Winston baby! Winston put together one of his gunslinger masterpieces as he took 3 sacks and threw 3 INT's including a pair of pick 6's that ultimately won the Broncos the game. This group will have a real soft landing spot when they return to action in Week 15 to take on the Colts turnover-prone, largely ineffective offense.  

Honorable Mentions: Cowboys, Steelers, Bills

LVP: 49ers

Anybody who played the 49ers this week with the hopes that the snow in Orchard Park would keep things tight paid for it dearly as they allowed 35 points without getting a single sack or takeaway. As long as Nick Bosa remains out, they'll be a shaky play, even in plus matchups like the one they have with the Bears this week.

Dishonorable Mentions: Ravens, Texans, Eagles

Quick Movie Reviews: Gladiator II, The Piano Lesson, Wicked

Gladiator II: There's some really great stuff in Gladiator II. The battle sequences from the huge naval battles down to the brutal 1-on-1 swordfights are absolutely remarkable, the production design team was able to transform modern day Malta into a richly detailed, jaw-dropping replica of Ancient Rome and getting Denzel Washington to play a sleazily charismatic arms dealer/aristocrat whose hungry to overthrow Rome's emperors (Joseph Quinn and Fred Hechinger, who both do some great scenery-chewing) is a masterstroke of casting that results in the birth of one hell of a villain. 

But as is often the case with modern day Ridley Scott films, the legendary director actively finds ways to limit the effectiveness of the really great working blueprint of a movie he has sitting in front of him. What should be a simple revenge tale of a lost son of Rome (Paul Mescal-who does well with the physicality of the role, but struggles to channel the fury that's supposed to flow through the character) fighting to bring down the corrupt, maniacal assholes responsible for his suffering (aka a slightly reworked version of the original's plot a la Star Wars: The Force Awakens) is complicated by Scott's insistence on stacking up underdeveloped subplots involving the large collection of side characters it introduces (minor spoiler: Pedro Pascal's General Acacius is involved in nearly all of them and still manages to sit on the sidelines for the bulk of the movie!) until it loses interest in the revenge tale entirely. The lack of catharsis, sorrow or really any emotion outside of apathy that the ending evokes is really shocking for a narrative that is steeped in tragedy, legacy and the mourning of a good life that the bloodlust of power-hungry tyrants didn't allow to be lived. Scott has been doing this shit for way too long to not have the discipline to focus on the story he's trying to tell and not dilute it by veering off into a million different directions that don't meaningfully add to the hero's journey. There's still enough entertainment value in the action sequences and macho soap opera theatrics for Gladiator II to work, it's just frustrating to see a movie that easily could've been great settle for being unremarkably good.             

Grade: B

The Piano Lesson: While the marriage between the story's grounded family drama and explicit supernatural elements isn't always the cleanest and there are a few scenes that could've been trimmed down or cut out entirely without impacting the plot in the slightest, The Piano Lesson is one of the best screen adaptations of an August Wilson play to date. Malcolm Washington does a good job of avoiding the stagey trappings that Wilson's single location, dialogue-heavy style tends to attract by moving the camera around and making purposeful, organic cuts that confirm that these actors aren't stuck in the cramped confines of a Broadway stage and the great performances from this small but mighty ensemble cast (John David Washington, Samuel L. Jackson, Danielle Deadwyler, Ray Fisher, Skylar Aleece Smith, Michael Potts, Corey Hawkins) are all able to find the sweet spot of honoring the heightened emotions of its theatrical origins with the comparatively minimalist approach cinema can use to explore its themes of generational trauma brought on by the lasting ramifications of slavery, family dynamics and how relatives are able to interpret their own family history in such radically different ways. Be sure to seek this one out on Netflix if you dug Ma Rainey's Black Bottom, Fences or just want to see a movie that's made for adults that explores the painful past of many families living in the United States in a unique way.   

Grade: B

Wicked: A collision of two chapters (blockbusters, musicals) of his unusual directorial career made Jon M. Chu the right person to finally bring Wicked to the big screen 21 years after it made its debut on Broadway. The veteran filmmaker tackles the sweeping musical setpieces, Wizard of Oz lore dumps and tale of the powerful friendship that once existed between two famous witches that went onto to become bitter rivals that makes up Wicked with a peppy, workmanlike craftsmanship that takes great pleasure in building up such a huge world. 

As much as Chu's giddy directorial proficiency benefits the production, it's the work of Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande that allows the film to really sing when it needs to (no pun intended). Elphaba and Galinda's relationship is the glue that ties this whole thing together and these two women beautifully capture how their vastly different personalities and upbringings caused them to resent then respect each other before they're forced to part ways by circumstances beyond their control. The strength of their efforts really materializes in the stirring final act that perfectly sets up the second half of the film. There's really no movie if those emotional beats don't land, and both Erivo and Grande do a terrific job of selling the devastation and necessity of this moment and how it allowed both women to fulfill the destiny this world had planned for them. The Oscar nominations that are likely coming their way will be well deserved.   

Despite the strength of its lead performances and Chu largely living up to the challenge of making an epic musical, there are some really glaring, embarrassing deficiencies that are impossible to overlook. The CGI is goofy as hell and violently clashes with the stunning practical sets Nathan Crowley designed while cinematographer Alice Brooks' muted, drab lighting choices fail to capture the vibrancy of its fantastical setting. It also continues the embarrassing recent trend of prequels, sequels and spin-offs making comically inorganic references to previous films in order to get some kind of nostalgic nod of approval from the audience or some shit (the Yellow Brick Road one here is a strong contender to top a certain Aliens reference from Alien: Romulus as the most egregious one of the year). Will any of these elements improve in Wicked: Part Two? Probably not, but I'm looking forward to finding out next November.                    

Grade: B

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 13

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Detroit Lions (10-1) Week 13 opponent: Chicago Bears

2.(2) Buffalo Bills (9-2) Week 13 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

3.(3) Kansas City Chiefs (10-1) Week 13 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

4.(6) Green Bay Packers (8-3) Week 13 opponent: Miami Dolphins

5.(7) Philadelphia Eagles (9-2) Week 13 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

6.(5) Minnesota Vikings (9-2) Week 13 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

7.(8) Baltimore Ravens (8-4) Week 13 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

8.(4) Pittsburgh Steelers (8-3) Week 13 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

9.(9) Los Angeles Chargers (7-4) Week 13 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

10.(13) Denver Broncos (7-5) Week 13 opponent: Cleveland Browns

11.(11) Washington Commanders (7-5) Week 13 opponent: Tennessee Titans

12.(12) Houston Texans (7-5) Week 13 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars

13.(10) Arizona Cardinals (6-5) Week 13 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

14.(18) Miami Dolphins (5-6) Week 13 opponent: Green Bay Packers

15.(19) Seattle Seahawks (5-6) Week 13 opponent: New York Jets

16.(16) Atlanta Falcons (6-5) Week 13 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

17.(17) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-6) Week 13 opponent: Carolina Panthers

18.(15) Los Angeles Rams (5-6) Week 13 opponent: New Orleans Saints

19.(14) San Francisco 49ers (5-6) Week 13 opponent: Buffalo Bills

20.(20) Cincinnati Bengals (4-7) Week 13 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

21.(21) Indianapolis Colts (5-7) Week 13 opponent: New England Patriots

22.(22) New Orleans Saints (4-7) Week 13 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

23.(23) Chicago Bears (4-7) Week 13 opponent: Detroit Lions

24.(28) Dallas Cowboys (4-7) Week 13 opponent: New York Giants

25.(25) New York Jets (3-8) Week 13 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

26.(27) Cleveland Browns (3-8) Week 13 opponent: Denver Broncos

27.(26) Carolina Panthers (3-8) Week 13 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

28.(29) Tennessee Titans (3-8) Week 13 opponent: Washington Commanders

29.(23) New England Patriots (3-9) Week 13 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

30.(30) Las Vegas Raiders (2-9) Week 13 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

31.(31) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-9) Week 13 opponent: Houston Texans

32.(32) New York Giants (2-9) Week 13 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

Week 12 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Jayden Daniels (Commanders)

For most of Sunday's divisional clash with the Cowboys, Daniels looked like he was headed for the bottom half of this section. Then the dust settled following a comically chaotic 4th quarter and the Commanders rookie QB had suddenly stuffed the stat sheet (275 YDS, 2 TD's 7 CAR, 74 YDS, TD, 2-PT CNV) and subsequently erased the sting of the 2 early INT's he threw in the process. Daniels has a date with the Titans in Week 13.  

Honorable Mentions: Patrick Mahomes (Chiefs), Lamar Jackson (Ravens), Tua Tagovailoa (Dolphins)

LVP: Jared Goff (Lions) (269 YDS)

Goff was his usual efficient self in a victory over the Colts, completing 26 of his 36 passing attempts for 269 YDS. However, he failed to find the endzone all day as his running backs accounted for all 3 touchdowns they scored and thus, put up an unexpected fantasy stinker in a terrific matchup. He'll be a questionable starting option against a Bears pass D that has been (mostly) very good this year.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Kyler Murray (Cardinals), Jordan Love (Packers), Jalen Hurts (Eagles)

Running Back

MVP: Saquon Barkley (Eagles)

This wasn't just one of the best performances of Barkley's career, it was one of the best RB performances in NFL history. Barkley carried the Eagles offense on his back in a dominant win over the Rams, rushing for 255 YDS and 2 TD's (both of which were 70+ YDS!) on 26 carries and catching 4 passes for 47 YDS. They'll need him to show up big again this week when they travel to Baltimore for a huge showdown with the Ravens.  

Honorable Mentions: Josh Jacobs (Packers), Jahmyr Gibbs (Lions), Tony Pollard (Titans)

LVP: Jonathan Taylor (Colts)

Negative gamescript and a stout Lions front prevented Taylor from being a factor in this one as he gained only 35 YDS on 11 carries. Taylor should fare much better this week against a soft Patriots run D that just got torched by De'Von Achane. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Christian McCaffery (49ers), Joe Mixon (Texans), Rhamondre Stevenson (Patriots)

Wide Receiver 

MVP: Courtland Sutton (Broncos)

Denver's top receiver showed up in a big way for a divisional clash with the Raiders, catching 8-of-10 targets for 97 YDS and a pair of scores. Sutton has been a strong WR2 since he posted that ugly 0 target donut in Week 7 against the Saints and with Bo Nix looking much better of late than he did at the start of the year, he should be able to hold down that role for the duration of the fantasy stretch run. 

Honorable Mentions: D.J. Moore (Bears), Jaylen Waddle (Dolphins), A.J. Brown (Eagles)

LVP: Justin Jefferson (Vikings) 

What a weird afternoon it was at Soldier Field on Sunday as Sam Darnold had his best passing day as a Viking, Jordan Addison had the best game of his career and Justin Jeferson caught just 2 passes for 27 YDS (and the second one wasn't until their game-winning drive in OT). Jefferson will look to snap his 5-game scoreless streak against a decent Cardinals pass defense in Week 13. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Deebo Samuel (49ers), Jayden Reed (Packers), Quentin Johnston (Chargers)

Tight End

MVP: Jonnu Smith (Dolphins)

Did somebody say Jonnu Smith revenge game? Really, no one did? Well, they should've because he stuck it to the Patriots on Sunday-catching 9 passes for 87 YDS and a TD. Smith has emerged as one of Tua's favorite targets over the past few weeks and with the short passing game becoming super important to the Dolphins offense now that Tyreek Hill is clearly laboring through multiple injuries, there's no reason to believe that he can't remain a fixture in the passing game moving forward.  

Honorable Mentions: Trey McBride (Cardinals), George Kittle (49ers), T.J. Hockenson (Vikings)

LVP: David Njoku (Browns)

Blinding lake effect snow put a real damper on the passing attacks in the Steelers/Browns game last Thursday night and nobody felt that struggle more than Njoku-who caught his lone target of the evening for 9 YDS in a huge upset victory for the now 3-8 Browns. Njoku will look to get back on track against a Commanders defense that allowed Cowboys backup TE Luke Schoonmaker to rip off a 3/55/1 performance last week. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Sam LaPorta (Lions), Cade Otton (Buccaneers), Dallas Goedert (Eagles)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Texans

Nothing says great fantasy day for a D/ST quite like allowing 30 points and still winning MVP. The Texans became the latest team to pull off this pretty rare feat by sacking Will Levis 8 times, recovering 2 fumbles and getting a pick 6 in what ended up being one of the weirder games played on a weekend full of weird games. The Texans have another plus divisional matchup this week against the Mac Jones-led Jaguars.  

Honorable Mentions: Broncos, Dolphins, Buccaneers

LVP: 49ers

The undermanned 49ers defense got absolutely smacked around by the Packers, surrendering 38 points while only managing 2 sacks and 0 takeaways against a struggling Jordan Love in a humiliating loss at Lambeau. Things aren't going to get any easier for the 49ers this week as they have to take on a scorching hot Bills team on the road.     

Dishonorable Mentions: Chiefs, Commanders, Ravens

Ben Stiller Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Ben Stiller-whose latest project "Nutcrackers" debuts on Hulu this Friday. 

Ben Stiller's Filmography Ranked:

27.School for Scoundrels (C-)

26.Duplex (C-)

25.Little Fockers (C)

24.Hubie Halloween (C)

23.Zoolander 2 (C)

22.Locked Down (C)

21.Keeping the Faith (C)

20.The Heartbreak Kid (C+)

19.The Royal Tenenbaums (C+)

18.Reality Bites (B-)

17.Heavyweights (B-)

16.Megamind (B-)

15.Night at the Museum (B-)

14.The Watch (B-)

13.Tower Heist (B-)

12.Mystery Men (B)

11.Meet the Fockers (B)

10.Starsky & Hutch (B)

9.Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (B)

8.There's Something About Mary (B+)

7.Along Came Polly (B+)

6.The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (B+)

5.Tropic Thunder (B+)

4.Meet the Parents (A)

3.Zoolander (A)

2.Happy Gilmore (A)

1.Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (A+)

Top Dog: Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)

1/3 of the holy trinity of 2000's absurdist comedy masterpieces (Hot Rod and Wet Hot American Summer round out this divine bunch), Anchorman is a relentlessly side-splitting affair that sees a team of comedy all-stars headed up by Will Ferell, Christina Applegate, Paul Rudd, Steve Carrell and Fred Willard putting up Jordan numbers for 90 straight minutes.    

Bottom Feeder: School for Scoundrels (2007)

School for Scoundrels is probably the weakest effort from Todd Phillips' past life as a comedy director.  Jon Heder doesn't have the gravitas or range required to handle a role that sees him alternating between passive nerd, assertive tough guy and sensitive romantic lead, Billy Bob Thornton is just doing a weaker version of the vulgar, curmudgeon prick routine he did in Bad Santa and The Bad News Bears, and it commits the ultimate sin of being instantly forgettable. 

Most Underrated: Along Came Polly (2004)

A gross out romantic comedy isn't an overly novel concept. Hell, The Farrelly Brothers built a whole damn brand off of this very specific genre hybrid! What makes Along Came Polly work despite its familiar conceit is the incredible, borderline head-scratching commitment from its primary cast. There's really no way in hell any of this works if the likes of Stiller, Jennifer Aniston and Phillip Seymour Hoffmann didn't show up and turn these characters that aren't overly exciting on the page into weird, endearing oddballs occupying a world where sweetness lives alongside sophomoric hijinks in a state of beautifully nonsensical bliss.      

Most Overrated: The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

One of these days I'll revisit all of the Wes Anderson films I saw before 2015 or so to figure out if I really harbor negative feelings towards them or simply just didn't understand or appreciate them at the time. Based on how I've felt about the Anderson films I have seen since then; the answer is a true coin flip. The Royal Tenenbaums will be a particularly interesting test since it's pretty widely viewed as his best film, but right now, I believe it's one of his more brazenly obnoxious pieces of work. The characters are all peak quirky Anderson caricatures and watching them interact for 2 hours is like being trapped in a conversation with the smuggest, least interesting motherfucker at a Harvard alumni luncheon.       

Michelle Yeoh Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Michelle Yeoh-whose latest project "Wicked" is in theaters now. 

Michelle Yeoh's Filmography Ranked:

17.Sunshine (D+)

16.Babylon A.D. (C-)

15.Minions: The Rise of Gru (C+)

14.Mechanic: Resurrection (C+)

13.Last Christmas (C+)

12.Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 (C+)

11.Master Z: Ip Man Legacy (B-)

10.Transformers: Rise of the Beasts (B-)

9.A Haunting in Venice (B-)

8.Crazy Rich Asians (B-)

7.Tomorrow Never Dies (B-)

6.Kung Fu Panda 2 (B)

5.Gunpowder Milkshake (B)

4.Fearless (B)

3.Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (B)

2.Everything Everywhere All at Once (B+)

1.Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (A-)

Top Dog: Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)

Excluding its awful standard issue CGI clusterfuck finale, Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings is a triumph that ranks among the MCU's finest hours. The mix of traditional superhero origin story with Hong Kong martial arts influences and Chinese mythology is seamless and exciting, Tony Leung's The Mandarin is a commanding villain that boasts real emotional depth and the character development for Shang-Chi is easily the strongest of any post-Endgame MCU movie. Hopefully the previously announced sequel will actually materialize at some point over the next few years.            

Bottom Feeder: Sunshine (2007)

Sunshine is once again getting some pop in the terminally online cinephile community in the wake of Chris Evans'-who is a frequent target of said community given his inclination to prioritize money over quality in his role selection since hitting the big time with his role as Steve Rodgers/Captain America in the MCU-recent red carpet comments about the quality of the movies he's making not mattering to him. While I don't necessarily disagree with the premise that Evans has ventured into "sellout" territory over the past decade or so, I vehemently disagree with the take that Sunshine is an example of a shining moment in his career. I actually think the ensemble psychological sci-fi thriller that also stars Cillian Murphy, Rose Byrne, Cliff Curtis, Hiroyuki Sanada and Yeoh is a deeply silly snoozefest that is probably the worst Danny Boyle joint that I've seen (Note: The Boyle films I haven't seen are Yesterday, The Beach, Millions and A Life Less Ordinary).     

Most Underrated: Gunpowder Milkshake (2021)

While not among the best noir-inspired assassin action flicks that have emerged in the wake of John Wick's success, Gunpowder Milkshake remains a fun little movie. The action sequences are full of quirky little choices that make them standout (Hammer fights! Karen Gillan fighting people in an office chair with paralyzed arms! A bowling alley setpiece that makes incredible use of its setting!), Michael Seresin's cinematography radiates a slick neon aura that matches the colorful grimy sheen that drives the film's criminal underworld, and it honors the rugged spirit of the genre by making great use of performers (Carla Gugino, Angela Bassett, Yeoh, Paul Giamatti, Ralph Ineson) whose gifts aren't always properly displayed in more "serious" projects.  

Most Overrated: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 (2017)

It does need to be noted that I haven't seen in Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 in a long time and that the film could grow on me with a rewatch. But for now, I view it as a disjointed, overly melodramatic affair that only rarely conjures up the magic of the other two films in the trilogy. 

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 12

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(2) Detroit Lions (9-1) Week 12 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

2.(3) Buffalo Bills (9-2) Week 12 opponent: Bye

3.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (9-1) Week 12 opponent: Carolina Panthers

4.(7) Pittsburgh Steelers (8-2) Week 12 opponent: Cleveland Browns

5.(5) Minnesota Vikings (8-2) Week 12 opponent: Chicago Bears

6.(6) Green Bay Packers (7-3) Week 12 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

7.(8) Philadelphia Eagles (8-2) Weel 12 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

8.(4) Baltimore Ravens (7-4) Week 12 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers 

9.(11) Los Angeles Chargers (7-3) Week 12 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

10.(10) Arizona Cardinals (6-4) Week 12 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

11.(9) Washington Commanders (7-4) Week 12 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

12.(14) Houston Texans (7-4) Week 12 opponent: Tennessee Titans

13.(17) Denver Broncos (6-5) Week 12 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

14.(12) San Francisco 49ers (5-5) Week 12 opponent: Green Bay Packers

15.(18) Los Angeles Rams (5-5) Week 12 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

16.(13) Atlanta Falcons (6-5) Week 12 opponent: Bye

17.(16) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-6) Week 12 opponent: New York Giants

18.(19) Miami Dolphins (4-6) Week 12 opponent: New England Patriots

19.(20) Seattle Seahawks (4-6) Week 12 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

20.(15) Cincinnati Bengals (4-7) Week 12 opponent: Bye

21.(21) Indianapolis Colts (5-6) Week 12 opponent: Detroit Lions

22.(24) New Orleans Saints (4-7) Week 12 opponent: Bye

23.(22) Chicago Bears (4-6) Week 12 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

24.(23) New England Patriots (3-7) Week 12 opponent: Miami Dolphins

25.(25) New York Jets (3-8) Week 12 opponent: Bye

26.(27) Carolina Panthers (3-7) Week 12 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs

27.(26) Cleveland Browns (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

28.(28) Dallas Cowboys (3-7) Week 12 opponent: Washington Commanders

29.(31) Tennessee Titans (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Houston Texans

30.(29) Las Vegas Raiders (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Denver Broncos

31.(30) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-9) Week 12 opponent: Bye

32.(32) New York Giants (2-8) Week 12 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

Week 11 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Jared Goff (Lions)

A relative cold streak for Goff came to an abrupt stop in Week 11 as he absolutely dismantled the lethargic Jaguars (412 YDS, 4 TD's, 21 Rushing YDS) in what very well could've been the most lopsided game played in the NFL so far this season. Goff will try and keep rolling against a poor Colts defense in Week 12.  

Honorable Mentions: Joe Burrow (Bengals), Bo Nix (Broncos), Matthew Stafford (Rams)

LVP: C.J. Stroud (Texans)

Stroud was once again average-to-below-average in a potential breakout spot, throwing for 257 scoreless YDS, adding another 26 on the ground and chucking an INT against the porous Cowboys. He's indisputably in the midst of a sophomore slump and should be viewed as a QB2 the rest of the way. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Kirk Cousins (Falcons), Jayden Daniels (Commanders), Lamar Jackson (Ravens)

Running Back

MVP: Joe Mixon (Texans)

With Stroud refusing to light it up in a cupcake matchup with the Cowboys, it was up to Mixon to power the Texans offense to victory, and he met the moment gracefully with 20/109/3 on the ground and 2/44 as a receiver. After this performance, Mixon now has 6 100+ YD performances and has scored at least 1 TD in every game he's finished this season. He'll be a top 5 RB1 play for this Sunday's divisional clash with the Titans.     

Honorable Mentions: Saquon Barkley (Eagles), David Montgomery (Lions), Breece Hall (Jets)

LVP: Tony Pollard (Titans)

For the 2nd straight week, an elite defensive front completely eliminated Pollard from the game as the Titans back gained just 29 YDS on 11 touches (9 carries, 2 receptions) against the Vikings. Things will only get slightly easier for Pollard this week as Titans are set to take on a Texans team that has allowed the 6th least fantasy points to RB's this season.

Dishonorable Mentions: Aaron Jones (Vikings), Travis Etienne (Jaguars), Nick Chubb (Browns)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions)

While still performing at a WR1 level, St. Brown had only one excellent performance over his past seven games coming into this week. Those figures are now up to two out of his last eight as St. Brown had his best game of 2024 against the Jaguars, reeling in 11 catches for 161 YDS and 2 TD's. St. Brown has a date with the Colts in the Week 12.

Honorable Mentions: Cooper Kupp (Rams), Tee Higgins (Bengals), Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

LVP: Terry McLaurin (Commanders)

McLaurin was in HELL last Thursday night as he struggled to get open against the Eagles upstart secondary. Unsurprisingly, his consistent lack of separation led to him logging season lows in receptions (1), YDS (10) and targets (2) as the Commanders suffered a tough divisional loss. He should get back into the good graces of his fantasy managers this week against a checked out, banged-up Cowboys squad.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Garrett Wilson (Jets), Deebo Samuel (49ers), DeAndre Hopkins (Chiefs)

Tight End

MVP: Taysom Hill (Saints)

Anybody who streamed Hill as an injury replacement for George Kittle, Sam LaPorta or Dalton Kincaid was handed quite the gift. The Mormon Missile was at the peak of versatile powers on Sunday against the Browns, throwing for 18 YDS, catching 8 passes for 50 YDS and rushing for 138 YDS and 3 TD's on just 7 carries. He also threw a pick and lost a fumble, but that doesn't really matter when he's stuffing the stat sheet like this. This will go down as a legendary performance that helped swing a lot of games and makes for an incredible addition to the already rich lore of a true folk hero in this silly game.  

Honorable Mentions: Jonnu Smith (Dolphins), Brock Bowers (Raiders), David Njoku (Browns)

LVP: Kyle Pitts (Falcons)

Kirk Cousins played like absolute shit against the Broncos on Sunday afternoon and unsurprisingly, Pitts suffered the most out of the Falcons top targets-being held to just 1 catch for 9 YDS on 3 targets. Their Week 12 bye couldn't be arriving at a better time for Pitts and his offensive cohorts as they've really hit a wall over the past couple games after a pretty strong stretch from Weeks 4-9.     

Dishonorable Mentions: T.J. Hockenson (Vikings), Pat Friermuth (Steelers), Mark Andrews (Ravens)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Texans

In a development that should shock no one, the Cooper Rush-led Cowboys got obliterated by the Texans ferocious defense. DeMeco Ryans' group secured 5 sacks, an INT and a fumble recovery that they returned for a TD in an easy 34-10 win. They'll have another golden opportunity to clean up in Week 12 against the turnover-happy, pass protection-challenged Titans offense.  

Honorable Mentions: Broncos, Vikings, Lions

LVP: Chiefs

Outside of Josh Allen serving them up a gift of an INT in the second quarter, the Chiefs defense had an uncharacteristically brutal showing against the Bills-surrendering 30 points and logging 0 sacks. A Week 12 showdown with the Panthers represents a potentially incredible bounceback spot.       

Dishonorable Mentions: Chargers, Jets, Saints

Movie Review: Red One

Cycling through an array of genres (buddy, fantasy, action, comedy, family drama) in service of a story that ultimately boils down to being about a dirtbag computer hacker/degenerate gambler/deadbeat father (Chris Evans) learning to become a decent person after being recruited by the head of a mythical creatures intelligence agency (Lucy Liu) to aid Santa's top bodyguard (Dwayne Johnson) in finding out who kidnapped Ol' Saint Nick (J.K. Simmons) approximately 24 hours before his worldwide present-delivering venture on Christmas Eve, Amazon's big Christmas blockbuster Red One presents itself as a big cornucopia of multi-faceted fun. But when you crack open that big mythical horn, the feast of abundance isn't as bountiful or delightful as promised. 

All of the efforts from Johnson, his production team at Seven Bucks and hand-picked writer/director duo of Chris Morgan (Fast and Furious franchise from Tokyo Drift through Hobbs & Shaw, Shazam!: Fury of the Gods) and Jake Kasdan (both new Jumanji films, Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story) to make something that checks multiple audience-friendly boxes ironically results in it missing the page entirely. What is the point of crafting a genre stew when you don't have the heart or the courage to commit to any of the ingredients individually, let alone as a cohesive whole? Without any meaningful efforts to make this wacky recipe work, all your left with is a milquetoast hodgepodge of half-baked ideas, unfilled potential and holiday cheer that has all the warmth and sincerity of a fucking Hallmark card. 

Even if it remained noncommittal to a genre and just injected a dash of Christmas with the Kranks or Jingle All the Way-esque cynical holiday depravity into the proceedings, it would've developed some much-needed personality that would've made it at least a little bit memorable. Something that at least claims to have aspirations of being an original Christmas-themed film that entertains a wide audience shouldn't be a such a big ball of nothing. Nobody is expecting something like Red One to be a bold film that challenges the conventions of mainstream filmmaking in the 2020's, but the pervasive plainness it shows with its open fear of embracing the genre-mixing that its concept invites is just plain lazy filmmaking. Will the majority of the kids that see it this holiday season enjoy it? Most likely, yes. Will most of those same kids want to watch it again next holiday season? Probably not. Dwayne and co. would probably be satisfied enough with those results if they were to materialize but making a movie that people struggle to remember by the time next November rolls around does nothing to break the memorability rut this beloved subgenre has been in since the mid 2000's.                                     

Grade: C

Lucy Liu Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Lucy Liu-whose latest project "Red One" releases in theaters today. 

Lucy Liu's Filmography Ranked:

18.Code Name: The Cleaner (D+)

17.Charlie's Angels (C)

16.Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (C)

15.Strange World (B-)

14.Shazam!: Fury of the Gods (B-)

13.Payback (B)

12.The Man with the Iron Fists (B)

11.Jerry Maguire (B)

10.Kung Fu Panda 3 (B)

9.Kung Fu Panda 2 (B)

8.Gridlock'd (B)

7.Kung Fu Panda (B)

6.Set It Up (B)

5.Shanghai Noon (B)

4.Lucky Number Slevin (B)

3.Kill Bill: Volume 2 (B)

2.Detachment (B+)

1.Kill Bill: Volume 1 (A+)

Top Dog: Kil Bill: Volume 1 (2003)

This absolutely immense piece of martial arts splatter vigilante goodness is my favorite thing Quentin Tarantino has made in the 21st century. The energy here is just relentlessly insane even by Tarantino's lofty standards, Uma Thurman's steely, simmering rage makes The Bride an elite vengeance-seeking protagonist and the Crazy 88 fight is probably the best action sequence Tarantino has ever put together. 

Bottom Feeder: Code Name: The Cleaner (2007)

The best part about Code Name: The Cleaner is that sounds like a completely made-up movie. Like what do you mean, there's a comedy where Cedric the Entertainer plays a man who wakes up in a hotel room with a dead body and has to figure out if he's a secret agent or a janitor? In a weird way, it's a peak January movie as it executes a high concept in a deeply questionable fashion, resulting in a bad movie that doesn't even have the courtesy to be memorably terrible.   

Most Underrated: Grid'locked (1997)

Tim Roth and Tupac Shakur make for a great buddy duo in this entertaining crime dramedy about a pair of heroin addicts who encounter a string of absurd hurdles as they attempt to check into rehab that ended up being Shakur's final acting role before his death. If you enjoy stuff like Trainspotting and Go, I'd encourage you to go seek this one out.   

Most Overrated: Kill Bill: Volume 2 (2004)

Here's a scorcher of a take: I think this is Tarantino's worst movie besides Death Proof. As terrific as the final sequence with The Bride and Bill is, the glut of flashbacks that make up the bulk of the film's runtime kneecap the urgency of The Bride's mission. It really is a blessing that somebody forced Tarantino to split this into two films because promptly downshifting from the hyperkinetic Tokyo sequence that Volume 1 ends on to this would've sucked the life out of the room.    

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 11

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (9-0) Week 11 opponent: Buffalo Bills

2.(2) Detroit Lions (8-1) Week 11 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

3.(3) Buffalo Bills (8-2) Week 11 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

4.(4) Baltimore Ravens (7-3) Week 11 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

5.(5) Minnesota Vikings (7-2) Week 11 opponent: Tennessee Titans

6.(6) Green Bay Packers (6-3) Week 11 opponent: Chicago Bears

7.(8) Pittsburgh Steelers (7-2) Week 11 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

8.(10) Philadelphia Eagles (7-2) Week 11 opponent: Washington Commanders 

9.(7) Washington Commanders (7-3) Week 11 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

10.(14) Arizona Cardinals (6-4) Week 11 opponent: Bye

11.(13) Los Angeles Chargers (7-3) Week 11 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

12.(12) San Francisco 49ers (5-4) Week 11 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

13.(9) Atlanta Falcons (6-4) Week 11 opponent: Denver Broncos

14.(11) Houston Texans (6-4) Week 11 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

15.(17) Cincinnati Bengals (4-6) Week 11 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

16.(15) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-6) Week 11 opponent: Bye

17.(18) Denver Broncos (5-5) Week 11 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

18.(16) Los Angeles Rams (4-5) Week 11 opponent: New England Patriots

19.(24) Miami Dolphins (3-6) Week 11 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

20.(20) Seattle Seahawks (4-5) Week 11 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

21.(21) Indianapolis Colts (4-6) Week 11 opponent: New York Jets

22.(19) Chicago Bears (4-5) Week 11 opponent: Green Bay Packers

23.(30) New England Patriots (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

24.(32) New Orleans Saints (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Cleveland Browns

25.(23) New York Jets (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

26.(26) Cleveland Browns (2-7) Week 11 opponent: New Orleans Saints

27.(31) Carolina Panthers (3-7) Week 11 opponent: Bye

28.(22) Dallas Cowboys (3-6) Week 11 opponent: Houston Texans

29.(29) Las Vegas Raiders (2-7) Week 11 opponent: Miami Dolphins

30.(25) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-8) Week 11 opponent: Detroit Lions

31.(27) Tennessee Titans (2-7) Week 11 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

32.(28) New York Giants (2-8) Week 11 opponent: Bye  

Week 10 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

 Quarterback

MVP: Joe Burrow (Bengals)

The second meeting between the Bengals and Ravens this season provided the world with another epic QB duel and once again, Burrow had a better statline (428 YDS, 4 TD's, 6 rushing YDS, 0 turnovers) than Lamar Jackson despite his team losing. Burrow should be in line for a much quieter evening this week as the Bengals take on a stingy Chargers D on SNF.   

Honorable Mentions: Lamar Jackson (Ravens), Jalen Hurts (Eagles), Kyler Murray (Cardinals)

LVP: Jayden Daniels (Commanders)

While it wasn't a completely horrendous performance, the Steelers were able to keep Daniels relatively quiet as he threw for 202 scoreless YDS and only picked up 5 YDS on his 3 rushing attempts. The OROY frontrunner gets the Eagles and their top 5 ranked defense in Week 11. 

Dishonorable Mentions: C.J. Stroud (Texans), Sam Darnold (Vikings), Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers)

Running Back

MVP: Bijan Robinson (Falcons)

Robinson majorly picked up the slack for an inefficient Kirk Cousins against the Saints, gaining 144 scrimmage YDS on 23 touches (20 carries, 3 receptions) and scoring twice on the ground in a heartbreaking divisional loss for the current NFC South leaders. He'll look to extend his insane streak of earning 18+ fantasy points in half PPR leagues to 6 games this week versus a Broncos defense that currently ranks in the middle of the pack against RB's.  

Honorable Mentions: Chuba Hubbard (Panthers), James Conner (Cardinals), Chase Brown (Bengals)

LVP: Travis Etienne Jr. (Jaguars)

Having Mac Jones under center and Tank Bigsby exiting the game with an injury early in the 1st quarter opened up a window for Etienne to seize control of the Jags offense in a surprisingly close game with the Vikings on Sunday afternoon. He failed to do that, turning his 11 carries into 44 YDS and adding just a lone catch for -1 YDS in the passing game. Regardless of Bigsby's status for their Week 11 contest with the Lions, Etienne will be nothing more than a desperation RB2/flex play against one of the league's few truly elite run defenses.    

Dishonorable Mentions: D'Andre Swift (Bears), J.K. Dobbins (Chargers), De'Von Achane (Dolphins)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

Remember when Chase put up a 10 REC/193 YD/2 TD line against the Ravens in Week 5? Well, it turns out that was only a small taste of the damage he was capable of inflicting on them. The Bengals star went full-blown nuclear against the poor, overmatched Ravens D-catching 11 passes for 264 YDS and 3 TD's. Chase's season high against teams that don't hail from Baltimore is 118 YDS and he's only cleared 62 YDS in one other game besides that, so this level of dominance hasn't been the norm for him at all in 2024, but maybe this latest explosion can be the springboard that elevates him to a more consistent level of strong play in the second half of the season.    

Honorable Mentions: Calvin Ridley (Titans), George Pickens (Steelers), Courtland Sutton (Broncos)

LVP: DeVonta Smith (Eagles)

A combination of Hurts only having to throw 20 passes on account of the score, A.J. Brown soaking up nearly half of the targets that were available and a nagging hamstring ailment lowering his snap count a bit led to Smith putting up a really quiet performance (2 REC/14 YDS) against the depleted, dejected Cowboys. As long as he's good to go physically, Smith will be a volatile WR2 for this Thursday's contest with the Commanders.   

Dishonorable Mentions: D.J. Moore (Bears), Zay Flowers (Ravens), Brian Thomas Jr. (Jaguars)

Tight End

MVP: Travis Kelce (Chiefs)

Kelce's late career rebranding as a high-volume short yardage threat continues to pay dividends for fantasy owners as he hauled in a team-high 8 receptions for 64 YDS and what ended up being the game-winning TD in a good old-fashioned AFC West rock fight with the Broncos. The nice 3-game streak he's put together over the past month is in real jeopardy of ending this week against a Bills defense that has allowed the 9th least points to tight ends this season.    

Honorable Mentions: Mark Andrews (Ravens), Sam LaPorta (Lions), George Kittle (49ers)

LVP: Jake Ferguson (Cowboys)

A lost fumble sunk Ferguson's line against the Eagles (4 REC/24 YDS) from relatively poor to very poor. With Dak Prescott now confirmed to be out for the season, Ferguson's already questionable fantasy value could continue to crater. He'll get a chance to regain the trust of his managers next Monday night against the Texans up-and-down secondary.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Dalton Kincaid (Bills), Hunter Henry (Patriots), Cole Kmet (Bears)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Eagles

Cooper Rush and co. handed the Eagles an abundance of gifts on Sunday as Vic Fangio's group secured 3 sacks, an INT and 4 (!) fumble recoveries in a 34-6 victory over the Cowboys. They have a date with the Commanders on Thursday night.   

Honorable Mentions: Bills, Vikings, Chargers

LVP: Jets

Man, the Cardinals just made a complete mockery of the Jets formerly vaunted defense-who generated 1 sack and 0 takeaways-this week in a 31-6 slaughter in Glendale. As poor as this group has looked on the whole since Robert Saleh's ouster in early October, they should do just fine against a wretched, turnover-happy Colts offense this week. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Bears, 49ers, Ravens

Movie Review: Heretic

Religious discourse occupies a unique space in the modern world because its prevalence tends to correlate with where you live and who you're surrounded by. Faith meaning anywhere between everything or nothing at all depending on who you elect to talk to has created this chasm that not only applies in how much discussion about it is being had in the world, but the very manner in which its discussed. Psychological horror/thriller Heretic dares to ask its audience something that almost no one bothers to ask anymore: What is the purpose of faith, and can your beliefs be challenged by your life experience or an outside force?

This question-driven exploration of faith manifests in the story of Mormon missionaries Sister Barnes (Sophie Thatcher) and Sister Paxton (Chloe East) and their visit with a man named Mr. Reed (Hugh Grant) at his home with the hopes of converting him to their Church. Reed is a hardcore theology buff who is eager to discuss religion and the nature of belief with a pair of people that have dedicated their lives to spreading the gospel of The Church of the Latter-day Saints. What starts off as a somewhat awkward but ultimately good-natured conversation slowly becomes sinister when the Sisters realize that Reed's "wife"-who he said was is in the other making a blueberry pie when they first arrived-doesn't exist and all of the doors in his house are locked on a timer that they don't have to access to. What Reed wants from these women is simple: He's put together a game to put their belief in a higher power to the test and the path they choose will dictate whether they leave his house safely or die. Terrified and conflicted on what direction to go in, Sister Barnes and Sister Paxton must lean on each other if they wish to make it out of Reed's house of faith-testing horror with their lives.

What's really cool about Heretic is that its writer/director tandem Scott Beck and Bryan Woods waste no time getting to the suspenseful hook. Reed's ominous lectures about religion, subtly disorienting camerawork that mirrors the feeling of the walls closing in on you and sound design that turns benign domestic sounds (ticking clocks, creaking doors, footsteps) into something viscerally sinister mimics the increasingly claustrophobic dread Barnes and Paxton are feeling as they realize their safety may be compromised. This feeling of palpable discomfort is parlayed into a pretty terrific second act where their fears are confirmed in ways they probably didn't even imagine as the threat stars to veer from vague hypothetical to something terrifyingly real. It's basically everything that a contained cat-and-mouse thriller should be and the fashion in which it marries its existential questions about religion with traditional horror filmmaking practices is really seamless.                      

Of course, a chamber piece wouldn't really work if it weren't for the contributions of its cast and the actors in Heretic all deliver in a major way. Grant is having a ball playing this kind of eccentric, somewhat pretentious maniac who cruelly preys on the vulnerable in a similar fashion as the religious figures he rails against do and both East and Thatcher do great work by turning the baked-in assumption that these characters are meek, polite-to-a-fault women on its head with the quiet strength and resilience they show in the face of grave danger. 

Eventually, Heretic loses its way during a final act where it's ideas about things such as idealism vs. truth in faith and what drives people to believe or not believe in God come together in an unsatisfying, arguably silly manner that snuffs out quite a bit of the strength of the film's riveting opening 2/3's. Still, this is a really solid bounceback project for Beck and Woods after the misguided 65 and an exceptional advertisement for any filmmaker that is seeking the services of any of these three gifted actors for a future project.                        

Grade: B

2024 NFL Mid-Season Awards+Updated Playoff and Super Bowl Predictions

Top Player: Lamar Jackson (Ravens)

Somehow, Jackson has been even better to start 2024 than he was during his MVP Campaign last season. He's having easily his best season as a passer by any meaningful metric you want to use (CMP%, QBR, YPA, TD's), has improved at getting the ball out quickly/evading the rush without upping his pick total (13 sacks taken, 2 INT's thrown in 9 games played) and remains the most lethal rushing QB in the league-clearing 500 YDS on only 84 attempts. A potentially tough stretch run that includes games with the Chargers, Texans and a pair of meeting with their archrival Steelers could disrupt his momentum, but if he can at least come close to maintaining this level of play during the final 7 games, he should be adding a 3rd MVP award to his trophy case.    

Honorable Mentions: Joe Burrow (Bengals), Josh Allen (Bills), Patrick Mahomes (Chiefs)

Top Offensive Player: Derrick Henry (Ravens)

Another huge factor in Jackson's incredible start to 2024 has been Henry. The 30-year-old back continues to deify conventional wisdom surrounding aging workhorse backs as he not only refuses to break down but looks about as good as he ever has. John Harbaugh and Todd Monken have done a masterful job of giving him some prolonged stretches of rest throughout the game and it's allowed him to come on like a freight train going 100 mph whenever the Ravens are trying to impose their will on the ground, which has resulted in him putting up some ridiculous numbers (6.0 YPC, 13 total TD's, season-long run of 87 YDS, clearing 1,000 YDS on the ground in only 9 games) that are well ahead of every other starting back in the league.  

Honorable Mentions: Justin Jefferson (Vikings), Saquon Barkley (Eagles), George Kittle (49ers)

Top Defensive Player: T.J. Watt (Steelers)

The Steelers defense is once again among the league's best, and Watt is the top reason why. His ability to disrupt a game is as reliable as ever-logging 33 tackles, 10 TFL's, 6.5 sacks, 14 QB hits, 16 pressures and 4 forced fumbles through 8 games and the depth-bolstering addition of Preston Smith at the trade deadline could set him up to feast even more to close out 2024.      

Honorable Mentions: Dexter Lawrence (Giants), Fred Warner (49ers), Kerby Joseph (Lions)

Top Offensive Rookie: Jayden Daniels (Commanders)

After all the buzz surrounding the 2024 QB class, Daniels has solidified himself as the clear top dog (as a rookie at least). While he's unquestionably benefitted from a really soft schedule, he's looked poised as a passer and explosive as a rusher from the jump and his high level of play is one of the top reasons the Commanders are off to such a surprisingly great start.    

Honorable Mentions: Brock Bowers (Raiders), Malik Nabers (Giants), Brian Thomas Jr. (Jaguars)

Top Defensive Rookie: Jared Verse (Rams)

The gap between the level of play of the offensive and defensive players in the 2024 rookie class has already proven to be enormous. Among the handful of defensive rookies that have gotten off to strong starts, Verse stands alone at the top of the mountain by a colossal margin. The Florida State product has been borderline elite as a Day 1 starter on the edge-particularly over the past month as the Rams have clawed their way back to .500 after a 1-4 start-picking up 33 tackles, 3.5 sacks, 13 QB hits, 22 pressures and a forced fumble.   

Honorable Mentions: Andru Phillips (Giants), Kamari Lassiter (Texans), Evan Williams (Packers)

Top Coach: Dan Quinn (Commanders)

We all know how Quinn's tenure with the Falcons ended after a great 2-season run from 2016-17 that included the infamous Super Bowl Collapse versus the Patriots. His (potential) redemption arc that started during his successful tenure as the Cowboys DC from 2021-23 has really kicked into high gear with the triumphant start to his 2nd head coaching gig with the Commanders. They've considerably improved in all 3 phases of the game after a horrific 2023 under Ron Rivera, OC Kliff Kingsbury has done an outstanding job of building a system that accentuates Jayden Daniels' strengths and best of all, his players have really bought into him as a leader.   

Honorable Mentions: Jim Harbaugh (Chargers), Raheem Morris (Falcons), Sean McVay (Rams)

Top Comeback Player: Kirk Cousins (Falcons)

Outside of an ugly Week 1 showing against the Steelers, Cousins has gracefully returned to form following a devastating Achilles injury that cost him the majority of the 2023 season. His accuracy has been excellent, he's on the same page as all of his top targets (Drake London, Darnell Mooney, Kyle Pitts) and has generally been the stabilizing force the Falcons wanted him to be when they brough him in free agency to succeed Desmond Ridder as their starting QB.   

Honorable Mentions: J.K. Dobbins (Chargers), Sam Darnold (Vikings), Damar Hamlin (Bills)

Mid-Season All-Pro Team

Quarterback

1st team: Lamar Jackson (Ravens)

2nd team: Joe Burrow (Bengals)

Running Back

1st team: Derrick Henry (Ravens), Saquon Barkley (Eagles)

2nd team: Josh Jacobs (Packers), Bijan Robinson (Falcons)

Wide Receiver

1st team: Justin Jefferson (Vikings), Zay Flowers (Ravens)

2nd team: Garrett Wilson (Jets), Nico Collins (Texans)

Tight End

1st team: George Kittle (49ers)

2nd team: Brock Bowers (Raiders) 

Tackle

1st team: Trenton Armstead (Dolphins), Penei Sewell (Lions)

2nd team: Tristian Wirfs (Buccaneers), Zach Tom (Packers)

Guard:

1st team: Quenton Nelson (Colts), Trey Smith (Chiefs)

2nd team: Joe Thuney (Chiefs), Chris Lindstrom (Falcons)

Center:

1st team: Creed Humphrey (Chiefs)

2nd team: Aaron Brewer (Dolphins)

Defensive End

1st team: Aidan Hutchinson (Lions), Myles Garrett (Browns)

2nd team: Nick Bosa (49ers), Trey Hendrickson (Bengals)

Defensive Tackle

1st team: Dexter Lawrence (Giants), Cameron Heyward (Steelers)

2nd team: Chris Jones (Chiefs), Alim McNeill (Lions) 

Outside Linebacker

1st team: T.J. Watt (Steelers), Khalil Mack (Chargers)

2nd team: Jonathan Greenard (Vikings), Kyle Van Noy (Ravens)

Inside Linebacker

1st team: Fred Warner (49ers), Logan Wilson (Bengals)

2nd team: Bobby Wagner (Commanders), Zack Baun (Eagles)

Cornerback

1st team: Zyon McCollum (Buccaneers), Marlon Humphrey (Ravens)

2nd team: D.J. Reed (Jets), Jalen Ramsey (Dolphins)

Safety

1st team: Kerby Joseph (Lions), Brian Branch (Lions)

2nd team: Xavier McKinney (Packers), Brandon Jones (Broncos) 

Kicker

1st team: Brandon Aubrey (Cowboys)

2nd team: Austin Seibert (Commanders) 

Punter:

1st team: A.J. Cole (Raiders)

2nd team: Jack Fox (Lions)

Return Specialist:

1st team: Kalif Raymond (Lions)

2nd team: DeeJay Dallas (Cardinals)

Special Teamer:

1st team: Feleipe Franks (Panthers)

2nd team: Miles Killebrew (Steelers)

Playoff and Super Bowl Predictions:

AFC:

1.Chiefs

2.Bills

3.Ravens

4.Texans

5.Steelers

6.Chargers

7.Bengals

Wild Card:

Bills over Bengals

Ravens over Chargers

Steelers over Texans

Divisional Round:

Chiefs over Steelers

Bills over Ravens

Conference Championship:

Chiefs over Bills

NFC:

1.Lions

2.Falcons

3.Commanders

4.Cardinals

5.Packers

6.Vikings

7.Eagles

Wild Card:

Falcons over Eagles

Vikings over Commanders

Packers over Cardinals

Divisional Round:

Lions over Vikings

Falcons over Packers

Conference Championship:

Falcons over Lions

Super Bowl:

Chiefs over Falcons