20.Chase Roullier (Redskins)
19.Mike Pouncey (Chargers)
18.Brett Jones (Giants)
17.Corey Linsley (Packers)
16.Justin Britt (Seahawks)
15.Maurkice Pouncey (Steelers)
14.Max Unger (Saints)
13.Ryan Kalil (Panthers)
12.Weston Richburg (49ers)
11.JC Tretter (Browns)
10.John Sullivan (Rams)
9.Ryan Jensen (Buccaneers)
8.Ben Jones (Titans)
7.David Andrews (Patriots)
6.Matt Paradis (Broncos)
5.Jason Kelce (Eagles)
4.Brandon Linder (Jaguars)
3.Rodney Hudson (Raiders)
2.Travis Fredrick (Cowboys)
1.Alex Mack (Falcons)
Thursday, May 31, 2018
Wednesday, May 30, 2018
The Best and Worst of Johnny Knoxville
“The Best and Worst of” series chronicles the career
highlights and lowlights of an actor starring in one of the week's
new theatrical releases. This week, I take a look at the filmography
of “Action Point” star Johnny Knoxville.
Films starring Johnny Knoxville that I've seen
Big Trouble
Men in Black II
Jackass: The Movie
Walking Tall
Lords of Dogtown
The Dukes of Hazzard
The Ringer
Jackass Number Two
Jackass 3D
The Last Stand
Movie 43
Bad Grandpa
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Best Performance: The Last Stand (2013)
The cult status The Last Stand has earned over the last couple of years can largely be attributed to Arnold Schwarzenegger making a return to his shotgun-toting, deadpan one-liner roots. If you ask me, Knoxville is every bit as essential to the success of this B-action gem as Austria's finest import since Mozart. The Jackass ring leader is in his zany comedic element as Lewis Dinkum, an eccentric antique weapon museum owner in an Arizona bordertown that gets called upon by Sherriff Ray Owens (Schwarzenegger) to help apprehend a notorious drug lord (Eduardo Noriega) that has escaped from federal custody.
Worst Performance: The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)
Knoxville's ability to perform in scripted movies is very underrated. Like his stuntwork, he's willing to go to great lengths to make an audience laugh and that unwavering level of commitment allows to him steal scenes with relative frequency. This gift went MIA when he portrayed Luke Duke in the big screen version of The Dukes of Hazzard. An inexplicable lack of rapport with fellow goofball Seann William Scott combined with a notable inability to improve the garbage jokes that were fed to him made his performance in this woefully unfunny flick hard to watch.
Best Film: Jackass Number Two (2006)
Jackass has provided the most immature section of the world's population with dozen of hours of hilarious content, but the second of their three big screen adventures remains the undisputed peak of their beautiful, self-destructive idiocy. Producing a breakneck series of sophomoric stunts, skits and pranks that's as consistently amusing as this is a testament to this reckless ensemble's underrated gift for delivering unforgettable physical/gross-out comedy.
Worst Film: The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)
How so many pleasant, funny individuals were able to make an action comedy that's as universally-inept as The Dukes of Hazzard is just baffling. Almost none of the jokes land, the car chases are stagnant to the point where they feel eternal and nobody besides Burt F'n Reynolds comes close to embracing the cartoonish silliness that the source material calls for. A serious waste of a terrific opportunity to make an enjoyable dumb buddy movie.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Ocean's 8” star Sandra Bullock.
Films starring Johnny Knoxville that I've seen
Big Trouble
Men in Black II
Jackass: The Movie
Walking Tall
Lords of Dogtown
The Dukes of Hazzard
The Ringer
Jackass Number Two
Jackass 3D
The Last Stand
Movie 43
Bad Grandpa
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Best Performance: The Last Stand (2013)
The cult status The Last Stand has earned over the last couple of years can largely be attributed to Arnold Schwarzenegger making a return to his shotgun-toting, deadpan one-liner roots. If you ask me, Knoxville is every bit as essential to the success of this B-action gem as Austria's finest import since Mozart. The Jackass ring leader is in his zany comedic element as Lewis Dinkum, an eccentric antique weapon museum owner in an Arizona bordertown that gets called upon by Sherriff Ray Owens (Schwarzenegger) to help apprehend a notorious drug lord (Eduardo Noriega) that has escaped from federal custody.
Worst Performance: The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)
Knoxville's ability to perform in scripted movies is very underrated. Like his stuntwork, he's willing to go to great lengths to make an audience laugh and that unwavering level of commitment allows to him steal scenes with relative frequency. This gift went MIA when he portrayed Luke Duke in the big screen version of The Dukes of Hazzard. An inexplicable lack of rapport with fellow goofball Seann William Scott combined with a notable inability to improve the garbage jokes that were fed to him made his performance in this woefully unfunny flick hard to watch.
Best Film: Jackass Number Two (2006)
Jackass has provided the most immature section of the world's population with dozen of hours of hilarious content, but the second of their three big screen adventures remains the undisputed peak of their beautiful, self-destructive idiocy. Producing a breakneck series of sophomoric stunts, skits and pranks that's as consistently amusing as this is a testament to this reckless ensemble's underrated gift for delivering unforgettable physical/gross-out comedy.
Worst Film: The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)
How so many pleasant, funny individuals were able to make an action comedy that's as universally-inept as The Dukes of Hazzard is just baffling. Almost none of the jokes land, the car chases are stagnant to the point where they feel eternal and nobody besides Burt F'n Reynolds comes close to embracing the cartoonish silliness that the source material calls for. A serious waste of a terrific opportunity to make an enjoyable dumb buddy movie.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Ocean's 8” star Sandra Bullock.
Tuesday, May 29, 2018
2018 NFL Position Rankings: Top 30 Guards
30.John Jerry (Giants)
29.Trai Turner (Panthers)
28.Ramon Foster (Steelers)
27.Clint Boling (Bengals)
26.Justin Pugh (Cardinals)
25.Cody Whitehair (Bears)
24.Quinton Spain (Titans)
23.Stefen Wisnewski (Eagles)
22.Ali Marpet (Buccaneers)
21.Josh Kline (Titans)
20.Joe Thuney (Patriots)
19.Laurent Duvernay-Tardif (Chiefs)
18.Andy Levitre (Falcons)
17.Kyle Long (Bears)
16.Gabe Jackson (Raiders)
15.Larry Warford (Saints)
14.Josh Sitton (Dolphins)
13.Ronald Leary (Broncos)
12.Brandon Schreff (Redskins)
11.Shaq Mason (Patriots)
10.T.J. Lang (Lions)
9.Rodger Saffold (Rams)
8.Kelechi Osemele (Raiders)
7.Kevin Zeitler (Browns)
6.Joel Bitonio (Browns)
5.Andrew Norwell (Jaguars)
4.Brandon Brooks (Eagles)
3.Zach Martin (Cowboys)
2.David DeCastro (Steelers)
1.Marshal Yanda (Ravens)
29.Trai Turner (Panthers)
28.Ramon Foster (Steelers)
27.Clint Boling (Bengals)
26.Justin Pugh (Cardinals)
25.Cody Whitehair (Bears)
24.Quinton Spain (Titans)
23.Stefen Wisnewski (Eagles)
22.Ali Marpet (Buccaneers)
21.Josh Kline (Titans)
20.Joe Thuney (Patriots)
19.Laurent Duvernay-Tardif (Chiefs)
18.Andy Levitre (Falcons)
17.Kyle Long (Bears)
16.Gabe Jackson (Raiders)
15.Larry Warford (Saints)
14.Josh Sitton (Dolphins)
13.Ronald Leary (Broncos)
12.Brandon Schreff (Redskins)
11.Shaq Mason (Patriots)
10.T.J. Lang (Lions)
9.Rodger Saffold (Rams)
8.Kelechi Osemele (Raiders)
7.Kevin Zeitler (Browns)
6.Joel Bitonio (Browns)
5.Andrew Norwell (Jaguars)
4.Brandon Brooks (Eagles)
3.Zach Martin (Cowboys)
2.David DeCastro (Steelers)
1.Marshal Yanda (Ravens)
Monday, May 28, 2018
Concert Review: Boston Calling (Day 2)-- Allston, MA-- May 26th, 2018
Lineup: Jack White/Queens of the Stone Age/St. Vincent/Royal Blood/Daniel Caesar/The Menzingers/Lillie Mae/Several others including Tyler, the Creator, Brockhampton and Manchester Orchestra
Venue: Harvard Athletic Complex, Allston, MA
Lillie Mae: Pure country/folk isn't my thing, but Lillie Mae's decision to close out her set with an 8-minute hoedown that featured multiple fiddle solos is an all-time flex move that I immensely respect.
The Menzingers: This festival served as the introduction to The Menzingers that I've somehow managed to avoid since they dropped their widely-acclaimed third LP On the Impossible Past back in 2012. While they're not an act I can see myself listening to with any degree of regularity, I get why they're arguably the most beloved midlife crisis punk band on the planet right now. With their sincere emotion, amusing stage banter and collection of relatively catchy songs, the Pennsylvania-based quartet made for a nice, early afternoon diversion.
Daniel Caesar: While watching Daniel Caesar play, I couldn't shake the feeling that he'd arrived in 2018 via a wormhole. The 23-year Toronto native's smooth voice, lush, guitar-driven instrumentals and romantic lyrics are straight out of the early R&B/soul playbook. Sadly, Caesar couldn't parlay his distinct nostalgic vibe and considerable vocal talent into a memorable performance. After the first couple of songs, everything began to bleed together and that lack of variety ended up making his set kind of a slog to sit through.
Royal Blood: After sitting with relative indifference through the first few hours of the festival, the block of artists that I came to see to play had finally arrived. Royal Blood made that wait worth it with an energetic set that showcased the riff-driven joys the British hard rock duo have delivered in spades during their relatively brief career thus far. The straightforward catchy grooves their songs are built around sound absolutely massive in person and their tightness as a unit is pretty impressive. Special shoutout to vocalist/bassist Mike Kerr for soldiering through the final quarter of the set after he clearly sustained a foot or ankle injury following a jump off the stack amps.
St. Vincent: Annie Clark is a mad genius. Her absurd vocal range, commanding stage presence, bizarre video backdrops and occasional bold rearrangements of her songs (ex: tropical guitar on "Rattlesnake", upbeat synths on "Slow Disco") resulted in a mesmerizing show that only got better as it went along. Even with the greatness that hit the stage after her set, this beautiful, eccentric display of virtuoso musicianship managed to be the day's undisputed top highlight.
Queens of the Stone Age: I've voiced my dissatisfaction with the recent output of Queens of the Stone ad nauseam over the past several years, so I was pretty fucking shocked that I ended up really enjoying their live show. The combination of thunderous riffs, stoner weirdness and vintage rockstar attitude that made them such a uniquely destructive force in the late 90's to mid 2000's was present during every moment of their hit-filled 75-minute set. I left their performance with a big smile and an overwhelming sense of regret that my stubborn ass emphatically passed on multiple opportunities to see them over the past five years.
Jack White: As strong as his dense studio catalog is, the live environment brings out the best in Jack White. The spontaneity that this setting allows for gives White the opportunity to tap into his blues/jazz/punk roots, which makes his shows an authentic, fun as all hell throwback to the days where talented people got together and created music on the fly. Being on a stage with several other gifted musicians grants him the freedom to improvise with each composition in interesting ways without completely disregarding the feel of the original studio track while also beefing up the rawness that has made him one of the most influential figures in rock music over the past 15-20 years. It was abundantly clear that this simple sense of freewheeling adventure is why he feel in love with music and it made his set a triumphant, joyous finale for the incredible stretch of performances that closed out the middle day of this year's Boston Calling.
Stray Observations:
-Jack White's guitar tone belongs in the Louvre.
-Despite the fact it was over 90 degrees and sunny when he was on stage, Daniel Caesar still felt compelled to wear a hoodie on stage. I guess Canadians are actually coldblooded.
-Josh Homme didn't kick any fans in the head! #progress
-Most WTF-inducing festival moment of the day: A 50-something couple that looked like Sons of Anarchy extras carrying folded up Razor scooters during Queens of the Stone Age's set.
-Boston Calling doesn't get enough credit for how well run it is. Nearly every set starts on time, the grounds are easy to navigate, there's good sightlines at every stage and just about every small issue from last year's festival (long entry/concession lines, PA issues on the main stage) were solved this year. If this level of near-universal proficiency continues, this festival is going to be on a Coachella/Bonaroo/Lollapalloza level in no time at all.
Scores:
Lillie Mae: C
The Menzingers: B-
Daniel Caesar: C+
Royal Blood: B+
St. Vincent: A
Queens of the Stone Age: A-
Jack White: A-
Setlists:
The Menzingers:
Tellin' Lies
Good Things
House on Fire
The Obituaries
Thick as Thieves
After the Party
In Remission
Your Wild Years
Burn After Writing
Lookers
I Don't Wanna Be An Asshole Anymore
Daniel Caesar included:
Japanese Denim (opener)
Hold Me Down
Best Part
Royal Blood:
Figure It Out
Where Are You Now?
Lights Out
I Only Lie When I Love You
Little Monster
Come on Over
You Can Be So Cruel
Hook, Line & Sinker
Loose Change
Out of the Black
St.Vincent:
Sugarboy
Los Ageless
Pills
New York
Savior
Masseduction
Huey Newton
Year of the Tiger
Marrow
Cruel
Cheerleader
Digital Witness
Rattlesnake
Young Lover
Fear the Future
Slow Disco
Queens of the Stone Age:
You Think I Ain't Worth a Dollar, but I Feel Like a Millionaire
No One Knows
Feet Don't Fail Me
The Way You Used to Do
Smooth Sailing
In My Head
My God is the Sun
The Evil Has Landed
Make It Wit Chu
Sick, Sick, Sick
I Sat By the Ocean
Domesticated Animals
Little Sister
Go With the Flow
A Song for the Dead
Jack White:
Over and Over and Over
Lazaretto
Wasting My Time (The White Stripes cover)
Corporation
Hotel Yorba (The White Stripes cover)
Love Interruption
Hello Operator (The White Stripes cover)
I Cut Like a Buffalo (The Dead Weather cover)
Black Math (The White Stripes cover)
Steady as She Goes (The Raconteurs cover)
Freedom at 21
The Hardest Button to Button (The White Stripes cover)
Connected by Love
Encore:
Little Bird (The White Stripes cover)
I'm Slowly Turning Into You (The White Stripes cover)
Ice Station Zebra
Why Walk a Dog?
Sixteen Saltines
When I Hear My Name (The White Stripes cover)
Blunderbuss
That Black Bat Licorice
Ball and Biscuit (The White Stripes cover)
Seven Nation Army (The White Stripes cover)
Venue: Harvard Athletic Complex, Allston, MA
Lillie Mae: Pure country/folk isn't my thing, but Lillie Mae's decision to close out her set with an 8-minute hoedown that featured multiple fiddle solos is an all-time flex move that I immensely respect.
The Menzingers: This festival served as the introduction to The Menzingers that I've somehow managed to avoid since they dropped their widely-acclaimed third LP On the Impossible Past back in 2012. While they're not an act I can see myself listening to with any degree of regularity, I get why they're arguably the most beloved midlife crisis punk band on the planet right now. With their sincere emotion, amusing stage banter and collection of relatively catchy songs, the Pennsylvania-based quartet made for a nice, early afternoon diversion.
Daniel Caesar: While watching Daniel Caesar play, I couldn't shake the feeling that he'd arrived in 2018 via a wormhole. The 23-year Toronto native's smooth voice, lush, guitar-driven instrumentals and romantic lyrics are straight out of the early R&B/soul playbook. Sadly, Caesar couldn't parlay his distinct nostalgic vibe and considerable vocal talent into a memorable performance. After the first couple of songs, everything began to bleed together and that lack of variety ended up making his set kind of a slog to sit through.
Royal Blood: After sitting with relative indifference through the first few hours of the festival, the block of artists that I came to see to play had finally arrived. Royal Blood made that wait worth it with an energetic set that showcased the riff-driven joys the British hard rock duo have delivered in spades during their relatively brief career thus far. The straightforward catchy grooves their songs are built around sound absolutely massive in person and their tightness as a unit is pretty impressive. Special shoutout to vocalist/bassist Mike Kerr for soldiering through the final quarter of the set after he clearly sustained a foot or ankle injury following a jump off the stack amps.
St. Vincent: Annie Clark is a mad genius. Her absurd vocal range, commanding stage presence, bizarre video backdrops and occasional bold rearrangements of her songs (ex: tropical guitar on "Rattlesnake", upbeat synths on "Slow Disco") resulted in a mesmerizing show that only got better as it went along. Even with the greatness that hit the stage after her set, this beautiful, eccentric display of virtuoso musicianship managed to be the day's undisputed top highlight.
Queens of the Stone Age: I've voiced my dissatisfaction with the recent output of Queens of the Stone ad nauseam over the past several years, so I was pretty fucking shocked that I ended up really enjoying their live show. The combination of thunderous riffs, stoner weirdness and vintage rockstar attitude that made them such a uniquely destructive force in the late 90's to mid 2000's was present during every moment of their hit-filled 75-minute set. I left their performance with a big smile and an overwhelming sense of regret that my stubborn ass emphatically passed on multiple opportunities to see them over the past five years.
Jack White: As strong as his dense studio catalog is, the live environment brings out the best in Jack White. The spontaneity that this setting allows for gives White the opportunity to tap into his blues/jazz/punk roots, which makes his shows an authentic, fun as all hell throwback to the days where talented people got together and created music on the fly. Being on a stage with several other gifted musicians grants him the freedom to improvise with each composition in interesting ways without completely disregarding the feel of the original studio track while also beefing up the rawness that has made him one of the most influential figures in rock music over the past 15-20 years. It was abundantly clear that this simple sense of freewheeling adventure is why he feel in love with music and it made his set a triumphant, joyous finale for the incredible stretch of performances that closed out the middle day of this year's Boston Calling.
Stray Observations:
-Jack White's guitar tone belongs in the Louvre.
-Despite the fact it was over 90 degrees and sunny when he was on stage, Daniel Caesar still felt compelled to wear a hoodie on stage. I guess Canadians are actually coldblooded.
-Josh Homme didn't kick any fans in the head! #progress
-Most WTF-inducing festival moment of the day: A 50-something couple that looked like Sons of Anarchy extras carrying folded up Razor scooters during Queens of the Stone Age's set.
-Boston Calling doesn't get enough credit for how well run it is. Nearly every set starts on time, the grounds are easy to navigate, there's good sightlines at every stage and just about every small issue from last year's festival (long entry/concession lines, PA issues on the main stage) were solved this year. If this level of near-universal proficiency continues, this festival is going to be on a Coachella/Bonaroo/Lollapalloza level in no time at all.
Scores:
Lillie Mae: C
The Menzingers: B-
Daniel Caesar: C+
Royal Blood: B+
St. Vincent: A
Queens of the Stone Age: A-
Jack White: A-
Setlists:
The Menzingers:
Tellin' Lies
Good Things
House on Fire
The Obituaries
Thick as Thieves
After the Party
In Remission
Your Wild Years
Burn After Writing
Lookers
I Don't Wanna Be An Asshole Anymore
Daniel Caesar included:
Japanese Denim (opener)
Hold Me Down
Best Part
Royal Blood:
Figure It Out
Where Are You Now?
Lights Out
I Only Lie When I Love You
Little Monster
Come on Over
You Can Be So Cruel
Hook, Line & Sinker
Loose Change
Out of the Black
St.Vincent:
Sugarboy
Los Ageless
Pills
New York
Savior
Masseduction
Huey Newton
Year of the Tiger
Marrow
Cruel
Cheerleader
Digital Witness
Rattlesnake
Young Lover
Fear the Future
Slow Disco
Queens of the Stone Age:
You Think I Ain't Worth a Dollar, but I Feel Like a Millionaire
No One Knows
Feet Don't Fail Me
The Way You Used to Do
Smooth Sailing
In My Head
My God is the Sun
The Evil Has Landed
Make It Wit Chu
Sick, Sick, Sick
I Sat By the Ocean
Domesticated Animals
Little Sister
Go With the Flow
A Song for the Dead
Jack White:
Over and Over and Over
Lazaretto
Wasting My Time (The White Stripes cover)
Corporation
Hotel Yorba (The White Stripes cover)
Love Interruption
Hello Operator (The White Stripes cover)
I Cut Like a Buffalo (The Dead Weather cover)
Black Math (The White Stripes cover)
Steady as She Goes (The Raconteurs cover)
Freedom at 21
The Hardest Button to Button (The White Stripes cover)
Connected by Love
Encore:
Little Bird (The White Stripes cover)
I'm Slowly Turning Into You (The White Stripes cover)
Ice Station Zebra
Why Walk a Dog?
Sixteen Saltines
When I Hear My Name (The White Stripes cover)
Blunderbuss
That Black Bat Licorice
Ball and Biscuit (The White Stripes cover)
Seven Nation Army (The White Stripes cover)
Friday, May 25, 2018
2018 NFL Position Rankings: Top 30 Tackles
30.Dion Dawkins (Bills)
29.Marcus Cannon (Patriots)
28.Terron Armstead (Saints)
27.Bryan Bulaga (Packers)
26.Mitchell Schwartz (Chiefs)
25.Charles Leno Jr. (Bears)
24.Russell Okung (Chargers)
23.Ryan Schrader (Falcons)
22.Jake Matthews (Falcons)
21.Ronnie Stanley (Ravens)
20.Demar Dotson (Buccaneers)
19.Ryan Ramcyzk (Saints)
18.Cordy Glenn (Bengals)
17.Duane Brown (Seahawks)
16.Nate Solder (Giants)
15.Alejandro Villaneuva (Steelers)
14.Daryl Williams (Panthers)
13.Donald Penn (Raiders)
12.Jack Conklin (Titans)
11.Ricky Wagner (Lions)
10.Marcus Gilbert (Steelers)
9.Taylor Lewan (Titans)
8.Jason Peters (Eagles)
7.Lane Johnson (Eagles)
6.Anthony Castonzo (Colts)
5.Joe Staley (49ers)
4.Tyron Smith (Cowboys)
3.David Bakhtari (Packers)
2.Andrew Whitworth (Rams)
1.Trent Williams (Redskins)
29.Marcus Cannon (Patriots)
28.Terron Armstead (Saints)
27.Bryan Bulaga (Packers)
26.Mitchell Schwartz (Chiefs)
25.Charles Leno Jr. (Bears)
24.Russell Okung (Chargers)
23.Ryan Schrader (Falcons)
22.Jake Matthews (Falcons)
21.Ronnie Stanley (Ravens)
20.Demar Dotson (Buccaneers)
19.Ryan Ramcyzk (Saints)
18.Cordy Glenn (Bengals)
17.Duane Brown (Seahawks)
16.Nate Solder (Giants)
15.Alejandro Villaneuva (Steelers)
14.Daryl Williams (Panthers)
13.Donald Penn (Raiders)
12.Jack Conklin (Titans)
11.Ricky Wagner (Lions)
10.Marcus Gilbert (Steelers)
9.Taylor Lewan (Titans)
8.Jason Peters (Eagles)
7.Lane Johnson (Eagles)
6.Anthony Castonzo (Colts)
5.Joe Staley (49ers)
4.Tyron Smith (Cowboys)
3.David Bakhtari (Packers)
2.Andrew Whitworth (Rams)
1.Trent Williams (Redskins)
Thursday, May 24, 2018
The Best and Worst of Thandie Newton
“The Best and Worst of” series chronicles the career
highlights and lowlights of an actor starring in one of the week's
new theatrical releases. This week, I take a look at the filmography
of “Solo: A Star Wars Story” star Thandie Newton.
Films starring Thandie Newton that I've seen:
Grid'lockd
Mission-Impossible: II
The Chronicles of Riddick
Crash
The Pursuit of Happyness
Norbit
Run Fatboy Run
RocknRolla
Best Performance: RocknRolla (2008)
Aided by some well-delivered sarcastic quips and an excellent rapport with costar Gerard Butler, Newton's sharp performance went down as one of the most memorable parts of this terrific Cockney crime comedy.
Worst Performance: Mission-Impossible II (2000)
Westworld has proven that Newton is a pretty badass action hero. After watching Mission-Impossible II for the first time earlier this month, I discovered that this wasn't always the case. Newton's turn as a renowned thief that teams up with Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) to thwart a crooked IMF agent's (Dougray Scott) plans to sell a lethal bioweapon on the black market is a first ballot entry in the wooden acting Hall of Fame. The dead expression that inhabits her face and shaky line readings she offers up over the course of this overly serious dud will be haunting my dreams for at least the next several weeks.
Best Film: RocknRolla (2008)
Guy Ritchie's return to the gangster comedy genre that helped him rise to prominence in the industry is a film that I really need to revisit. While it fails to replicate the manic magic of Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch, RocknRolla is still a strong showcase for Ritchie's underrated ability to craft vibrant characters, witty dialogue and elaborate criminal schemes that go horribly wrong for all parties involved.
Worst Film: Norbit (2007)
Let me tell you, I can't think of many things that are funnier than 90 minutes of Eddie Murphy doing cartoonish accents while wearing a fatsuit and/or facial prosthetics. It's honestly disheartening to watch a talented comedian be reduced to appearing in a project that's essentially an obnoxious, scripted game of dress-up that makes the Nutty Professor series look like the apex of comedy. If nothing else, Murphy can at least take solace in the fact that Norbit isn't quite as unfunny or mean-spirited as Adam Sandler's Jack & Jill.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Action Point” star Johnny Knoxville.
Films starring Thandie Newton that I've seen:
Grid'lockd
Mission-Impossible: II
The Chronicles of Riddick
Crash
The Pursuit of Happyness
Norbit
Run Fatboy Run
RocknRolla
Best Performance: RocknRolla (2008)
Aided by some well-delivered sarcastic quips and an excellent rapport with costar Gerard Butler, Newton's sharp performance went down as one of the most memorable parts of this terrific Cockney crime comedy.
Worst Performance: Mission-Impossible II (2000)
Westworld has proven that Newton is a pretty badass action hero. After watching Mission-Impossible II for the first time earlier this month, I discovered that this wasn't always the case. Newton's turn as a renowned thief that teams up with Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) to thwart a crooked IMF agent's (Dougray Scott) plans to sell a lethal bioweapon on the black market is a first ballot entry in the wooden acting Hall of Fame. The dead expression that inhabits her face and shaky line readings she offers up over the course of this overly serious dud will be haunting my dreams for at least the next several weeks.
Best Film: RocknRolla (2008)
Guy Ritchie's return to the gangster comedy genre that helped him rise to prominence in the industry is a film that I really need to revisit. While it fails to replicate the manic magic of Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch, RocknRolla is still a strong showcase for Ritchie's underrated ability to craft vibrant characters, witty dialogue and elaborate criminal schemes that go horribly wrong for all parties involved.
Worst Film: Norbit (2007)
Let me tell you, I can't think of many things that are funnier than 90 minutes of Eddie Murphy doing cartoonish accents while wearing a fatsuit and/or facial prosthetics. It's honestly disheartening to watch a talented comedian be reduced to appearing in a project that's essentially an obnoxious, scripted game of dress-up that makes the Nutty Professor series look like the apex of comedy. If nothing else, Murphy can at least take solace in the fact that Norbit isn't quite as unfunny or mean-spirited as Adam Sandler's Jack & Jill.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Action Point” star Johnny Knoxville.
Wednesday, May 23, 2018
Movie Review: Deadpool 2
It's amazing how quickly the brain can forget past mistakes when something goes right. This strange hallmark of the human experience can be applied to Deadpool 2. The sequel to 2016's vulgar superhero megahit solves just about every one of the abundance of problems (anonymous villain, mediocre action, the fact that it was a wanna-be satire of superhero movies that played out exactly like a run-of-the-mill entry in the genre) that made its predecessor a huge disappointment while simultaneously maintaining and improving the elements (meta/strange pop culture humor, playful tone, Ryan Reynolds' fantastic performance as the titular smartass antihero) from the original that worked.
Deadpool was an instance where a perfectly-cast lead actor pretty much carried an otherwise average film on their shoulders. This time around, Reynolds receives some much-needed help from his friends. Cable (Josh Brolin) makes for a commanding yet sympathetic antagonist, director David Leitch (John Wick, Atomic Blonde) stages a number of strong fight scenes and Domino (Zazie Beetz) and Russell/Firefist (Julian Dennison) are ideal sidekicks/verbal sparring partners for The Merc with a Mouth. It might not sound like much in writing, but adding more comedically-gifted actors to the cast, having engaging action sequences that fully embrace the gory freedom that the R-rating allows and introducing a villain that doesn't evaporate from your brain once you leave the theater provides Deadpool 2 with the spark it needed to become a distinct no-holds-barred superhero flick.
While its story was still a little too sentimental for an irreverent film that aspires to rebel against the genre norm, Deadpool 2 is still a considerable improvement over the first installment. Delivering on the cliché "bigger and better" stigma that gets attached to sequels is a pretty rare phenomenon that deserves to be celebrated whenever it occurs. Whether Fox decides to make another solo Deadpool project or expand upon the X-Force introduction that was made in the final act of this film, I hope that Reynolds and the rest of the creative team continue to make use of the well-balanced comedy/action blueprint they trotted out here.
Grade: B+
Tuesday, May 22, 2018
As We Proceed Episode #19
On this month's episode of the internet's most celebrated botany podcast, Feliciano and I engage an in-depth discussion about Childish Gambino's "This is America" music video and the countless thinkpieces it inspired, review Post Malone's chart-topping LP beerbongs & bentleys and praise Young Dolph for publicly compensating the pair of Duke University coffee shop workers that got fired for playing his music on the job. This hour of occasionally enlightened conversation can be found on these sensual platforms:
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/asweproceedpodcast/how-to-party-with-caucasians
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/as-we-proceed/id1122163104?mt=2
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hQNv7jtVHA
Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/asweproceedpodcast/how-to-party-with-caucasians
iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/as-we-proceed/id1122163104?mt=2
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hQNv7jtVHA
Monday, May 21, 2018
Concert Review: Flatbush Zombies-- Boston, MA-- May 19th, 2018
Lineup: Flatbush Zombies/Kirk Knight/Nyck Caution
Venue: House of Blues, Boston, MA
Date: May 19th, 2018
Nyck Caution: Was stuck in line outside of the wonderful House of Blues for over an hour and missed his set.
Kirk Knight: By the time I finally made into the building, Kirk Knight had already started his set. Despite being regularly burdened with overly loud backing tracks, the Pro Era rapper/producer was still pretty enjoyable. The 23-year old has some decent bars and a natural, charismatic stage presence that won the crowd over almost immediately. While he's not likely to unseat his pal Joey Bada$$ as the leader of New York's most prolific hip-hop collective anytime soon, Knight appears to have enough ability to enjoy a nice solo career.
Flatbush Zombies: After seeing them put on a stellar show in front of a suspect crowd at Boston Calling last Memorial Day weekend, I expressed my desire to see Flatbush Zombies play a headlining show ASAP. If they were an incendiary force in front of a relatively indifferent early afternoon festival audience, a performance in front of a room full of their fans must be completely insane. That theory proved to be correct as Brooklyn's finest undead hip-hop trio absolutely burned up the stage in front of a sold out crowd at Boston's most spectacular music hall on Saturday night.
Out of all the hip-hop acts I've seen perform, Flatbush is easily the most intense. They possess the true punk aesthetic that so many new rappers have unsuccessfully tried to adapt and this rare quality helps make their shows feel like a god damn riot. All three members were on a warpath as soon as they walked on stage-jumping/running around during almost every song, diving into the crowd and encouraging mayhem at every corner. The portion of the crowd that overindulged in controlled substances and were sidelined for the back half of their set after going WAY too hard out of the gate probably didn't appreciate it, but I felt that the constant activity on-and-off stage led to the creation of a fun, uniquely raucous atmosphere that you don't get to experience often at hip-hop shows.
Amidst all of the excitement their frantic stage show and subsequent explosive audience response generates, it's easy to gloss over just how great these guys are at their craft. Watching Meechy Darko, Zombie Juice and Erick "Arc" Elliott rip through roughly 95 minutes of material is like attending an intensive class on the art of proficient rapping. With their abundant swagger, near-perfect delivery and full-on embrace of the group mentality, they make the difficult look completely routine. They might not always hit home runs in the studio (as evidenced by the inconsistency present on all of their releases save for 2014's BetterOffDEAD), but their immense technical gifts will always help make their live performances amazing.
This performance was enough for me to officially place Flatbush Zombies in my personal hall of fame for live hip-hop acts. Their elite showmanship combined with the visceral boost their raw, often abrasive style of music receives when it's played in front of a room full of hyped up people makes their shows an absolute can't miss experience. Long live the Zombie Gang.
Scores:
Kirk Knight: B-
Flatbush Zombies: A
Setlist:
Flatbush Zombies:
HELL-O
Chunky
Bounce
Headstone
M. Bison
Vacation
Big Shrimp
U &I
This is It
New Phone, Who Dis?
Ascension
Facts
Leather Symphony
Lava
Proxies
Trapped
222
Trade-Off
Best American
AmeriKKKan Pie
S.C.O.S.A.
Bath Salt (A$AP Mob cover)
The Glory
Encore:
Palm Trees
Venue: House of Blues, Boston, MA
Date: May 19th, 2018
Nyck Caution: Was stuck in line outside of the wonderful House of Blues for over an hour and missed his set.
Kirk Knight: By the time I finally made into the building, Kirk Knight had already started his set. Despite being regularly burdened with overly loud backing tracks, the Pro Era rapper/producer was still pretty enjoyable. The 23-year old has some decent bars and a natural, charismatic stage presence that won the crowd over almost immediately. While he's not likely to unseat his pal Joey Bada$$ as the leader of New York's most prolific hip-hop collective anytime soon, Knight appears to have enough ability to enjoy a nice solo career.
Flatbush Zombies: After seeing them put on a stellar show in front of a suspect crowd at Boston Calling last Memorial Day weekend, I expressed my desire to see Flatbush Zombies play a headlining show ASAP. If they were an incendiary force in front of a relatively indifferent early afternoon festival audience, a performance in front of a room full of their fans must be completely insane. That theory proved to be correct as Brooklyn's finest undead hip-hop trio absolutely burned up the stage in front of a sold out crowd at Boston's most spectacular music hall on Saturday night.
Out of all the hip-hop acts I've seen perform, Flatbush is easily the most intense. They possess the true punk aesthetic that so many new rappers have unsuccessfully tried to adapt and this rare quality helps make their shows feel like a god damn riot. All three members were on a warpath as soon as they walked on stage-jumping/running around during almost every song, diving into the crowd and encouraging mayhem at every corner. The portion of the crowd that overindulged in controlled substances and were sidelined for the back half of their set after going WAY too hard out of the gate probably didn't appreciate it, but I felt that the constant activity on-and-off stage led to the creation of a fun, uniquely raucous atmosphere that you don't get to experience often at hip-hop shows.
Amidst all of the excitement their frantic stage show and subsequent explosive audience response generates, it's easy to gloss over just how great these guys are at their craft. Watching Meechy Darko, Zombie Juice and Erick "Arc" Elliott rip through roughly 95 minutes of material is like attending an intensive class on the art of proficient rapping. With their abundant swagger, near-perfect delivery and full-on embrace of the group mentality, they make the difficult look completely routine. They might not always hit home runs in the studio (as evidenced by the inconsistency present on all of their releases save for 2014's BetterOffDEAD), but their immense technical gifts will always help make their live performances amazing.
This performance was enough for me to officially place Flatbush Zombies in my personal hall of fame for live hip-hop acts. Their elite showmanship combined with the visceral boost their raw, often abrasive style of music receives when it's played in front of a room full of hyped up people makes their shows an absolute can't miss experience. Long live the Zombie Gang.
Scores:
Kirk Knight: B-
Flatbush Zombies: A
Setlist:
Flatbush Zombies:
HELL-O
Chunky
Bounce
Headstone
M. Bison
Vacation
Big Shrimp
U &I
This is It
New Phone, Who Dis?
Ascension
Facts
Leather Symphony
Lava
Proxies
Trapped
222
Trade-Off
Best American
AmeriKKKan Pie
S.C.O.S.A.
Bath Salt (A$AP Mob cover)
The Glory
Encore:
Palm Trees
Friday, May 18, 2018
2018 NFL Position Rankings: Top 20 Tight Ends
20.George Kittle (49ers)
19.Benjamin Watson (Saints)
18.Austin Hooper (Falcons)
17.Vernon Davis (Redskins)
16.Eric Ebron (Colts)
15.Tyler Eifert (Bengals)
14.Charles Clay (Bills)
13.Jared Cook (Raiders)
12.Cameron Brate (Buccaneers)
11.Hunter Henry (Chargers)
10.Jack Doyle (Colts)
9.Evan Engram (Giants)
8.Kyle Rudolph (Vikings)
7.Jordan Reed (Redskins)
6.Jimmy Graham (Packers)
5.Delanie Walker (Titans)
4.Greg Olsen (Panthers)
3.Zach Ertz (Eagles)
2.Travis Kelce (Chiefs)
1.Rob Gronkowski (Patriots)
19.Benjamin Watson (Saints)
18.Austin Hooper (Falcons)
17.Vernon Davis (Redskins)
16.Eric Ebron (Colts)
15.Tyler Eifert (Bengals)
14.Charles Clay (Bills)
13.Jared Cook (Raiders)
12.Cameron Brate (Buccaneers)
11.Hunter Henry (Chargers)
10.Jack Doyle (Colts)
9.Evan Engram (Giants)
8.Kyle Rudolph (Vikings)
7.Jordan Reed (Redskins)
6.Jimmy Graham (Packers)
5.Delanie Walker (Titans)
4.Greg Olsen (Panthers)
3.Zach Ertz (Eagles)
2.Travis Kelce (Chiefs)
1.Rob Gronkowski (Patriots)
Thursday, May 17, 2018
Album Review: Playboi Carti-Die Lit
It's difficult to explain the appeal of Playboi Carti's music without sounding like a complete maniac. Carti is a minimally charismatic, often lethargic presence with mic skills that are sloppy on a good day, yet he almost always manages to deliver a product that is really enjoyable to listen to. On his official debut LP Die Lit, the most inexplicably enjoyable rapper to ever hop into a booth shines a bright light on these unconventional musical gifts by putting forth the strongest effort of his pretty brief career thus far.
What makes Carti such a compelling figure is the emphasis he puts on utilizing bold production. While he's far from the only rapper that choses to let the beat do the heavy lifting, Carti has a tendency to gravitate towards shit that is more visceral and off-the-wall than the genre norm. This audial gift gets taken to the next level on Die Lit. Enlisting frequent collaborator Pi'erre Bourne to handle the bulk of the work behind the boards was a brilliant creative decision that heightened the suffocating atmosphere that drives his music. Bourne's mesmerizing beats transform Carti's parade of ablib-and-excess driven verses into hypnotic blasts of ignorant oddball trap that left me feeling like I had floated into a parallel universe where sports cars, Instagram models and hallucinogenic substances reign supreme. When you roll out music with an aesthetic that's as hard-hitting and richly textured as the one that flows through Die Lit, the lack of technical proficiency present in the rapping doesn't matter in the slightest.
As satisfied as I am with the current state of hip-hop, I completely understand the criticisms that are lobbied towards records like Die Lit. Listening to collections of tracks about popping pills, buying designer clothes and having wild sex with a multitude of women can be really tedious, particularly if you have an affinity for the genre's rich history of raw, powerful storytelling. That being said, plenty of other genres have artists that are solely renowned for their instrumentation and I don't see why hip-hop should be viewed through a different lens. Beats are the hip-hop equivalent of a cool guitar riff or a thundering bassline and when an album boasts a collection of strong ones, it can serve as the driving force behind its memorability, catchiness, etc. Die Lit is as effective as a mood piece can possibly be and I'd recommend it to anyone that's willing to look past the repetitive, non-lyrical structure of the rapping.
What makes Carti such a compelling figure is the emphasis he puts on utilizing bold production. While he's far from the only rapper that choses to let the beat do the heavy lifting, Carti has a tendency to gravitate towards shit that is more visceral and off-the-wall than the genre norm. This audial gift gets taken to the next level on Die Lit. Enlisting frequent collaborator Pi'erre Bourne to handle the bulk of the work behind the boards was a brilliant creative decision that heightened the suffocating atmosphere that drives his music. Bourne's mesmerizing beats transform Carti's parade of ablib-and-excess driven verses into hypnotic blasts of ignorant oddball trap that left me feeling like I had floated into a parallel universe where sports cars, Instagram models and hallucinogenic substances reign supreme. When you roll out music with an aesthetic that's as hard-hitting and richly textured as the one that flows through Die Lit, the lack of technical proficiency present in the rapping doesn't matter in the slightest.
As satisfied as I am with the current state of hip-hop, I completely understand the criticisms that are lobbied towards records like Die Lit. Listening to collections of tracks about popping pills, buying designer clothes and having wild sex with a multitude of women can be really tedious, particularly if you have an affinity for the genre's rich history of raw, powerful storytelling. That being said, plenty of other genres have artists that are solely renowned for their instrumentation and I don't see why hip-hop should be viewed through a different lens. Beats are the hip-hop equivalent of a cool guitar riff or a thundering bassline and when an album boasts a collection of strong ones, it can serve as the driving force behind its memorability, catchiness, etc. Die Lit is as effective as a mood piece can possibly be and I'd recommend it to anyone that's willing to look past the repetitive, non-lyrical structure of the rapping.
Grade: B
Standout Tracks
1.R.I.P.
2.Mileage (feat. Chief Keef)
3.Poke It Out (feat. Nicki Minaj)
Wednesday, May 16, 2018
Album Review: Post Malone-beerbongs & bentleys
No entity living, dead or divine could manufacture an entertainer more perfect for 2018's pop culture climate than Post Malone. A 23-year old white rapper/singer that regularly pumps out polarizing chart-topping hits and headline-grabbing pull quotes is an eternal blessing for the social media firing squads that thrive off of loud, pointed outrage that disappears just as fast as it arrives. In the shadow of the constant dragging and "Post Malone is over" tweets, he's only managed to get more popular, pumping out a trio of top 10 singles ("Congratulations", "Psycho" and "Rockstar"-the latter of which held the top spot on the Billboard Hot 100 for eight straight weeks) and smashing multiple streaming records since the start of 2017. His second full-length album beerbongs & bentleys provides ample evidence of the easygoing attitude and slept-on gift for crafting memorable vocal melodies that has allowed him to overcome all of the bullshit internet noise to become one of hip-hop's biggest breakout stars.
On the surface, beerbongs & bentleys isn't exactly a dynamic album. It's a lengthy meditation on the pros and cons of becoming famous that features plenty of soaring choruses, atmospheric production and guest verses from some of modern hip-hop's most prominent figures (Nicki Minaj, Swae Lee, 21 Savage, G-Eazy, YG, Ty Dolla $ign). Despite this pile of familiar characteristics, Post's consistently memorable vocal melodies and energetic delivery ensure that beerbongs & Bentleys never becomes stale. This colony of massive earworms that are tailored to match the subtle stylistic changes present in each moody yet melodic beat make the relatively gaudy 64-minute runtime fly by while also possessing a special addictive quality that practically begs you to keep coming back to these tracks. In less bizarre words, roughly 75% of the hooks and bridges on this record haven been stuck in my head since I first heard this last week, which is an undeniable sign that a pop rap album has done its job.
beerbongs & bentleys is a two-pronged W for Post Malone. It's a breezy LP full of catchy-ass songs that are ideal for a party or any laid-back summer activity as well as a more confident and polished effort than its predecessor (2016's Stoney). While it's a longshot to end up on my year-end best list, this is still a highly enjoyable effort from a talented artist that I feel gets far more flack than he deserves.
Grade: B
Standout Tracks
1.Over Now
2.92 Explorer
3.Zack and Codeine
Tuesday, May 15, 2018
2018 NFL Position Rankings: Top 50 Wide Receivers
50.Randall Cobb (Packers)
49.Nelson Agholor (Eagles)
48.Sterling Shepard (Giants)
47.Paul Richardson (Redskins)
46.Tyrell Williams (Chargers)
45.Jermaine Kearse (Jets)
44.Mohamed Sanu (Falcons)
43.Jamison Crowder (Redskins)
42.Mike Wallace (Eagles)
41.Kenny Stills (Dolphins)
40.Jordy Nelson (Raiders)
39.Josh Gordon (Browns)
38.Pierre Garcon (49ers)
37.Devin Funchess (Panthers)
36.Robby Anderson (Jets)
35.Sammy Watkins (Chiefs)
34.Cooper Kupp (Rams)
33.Marquise Goodwin (49ers)
32.Allen Robinson (Bears)
31.Julian Edelman (Patriots)
30.Michael Crabtree (Ravens)
29.Kelvin Benjamin (Bills)
28.Robert Woods (Rams)
27.Rishard Matthews (Titans)
26.JuJu Smith-Schuster (Steelers)
25.Emmanuel Sanders (Broncos)
24.Dez Bryant (Free Agent)
23.Amari Cooper (Raiders)
22.DeSean Jackson (Buccaneers)
21.Davante Adams (Packers)
20.Stefon Diggs (Vikings)
19.Marvin Jones Jr. (Lions)
18.Adam Thielen (Vikings)
17.Golden Tate (Lions)
16.Jarvis Landry (Browns)
15.Alshon Jeffrey (Eagles)
14.Brandin Cooks (Rams)
13.Demaryius Thomas (Broncos)
12.Tyreek Hill (Chiefs)
11.Larry Fitzgerald (Cardinals)
10.T.Y. Hilton (Colts)
9.Mike Evans (Buccaneers)
8.Keenan Allen (Chargers)
7.Doug Baldwin (Seahawks)
6.Michael Thomas (Saints)
5.A.J. Green (Bengals)
4.Julio Jones (Falcons)
3.Odell Beckham Jr. (Giants)
2.DeAndre Hopkins (Texans)
1.Antonio Brown (Steelers)
49.Nelson Agholor (Eagles)
48.Sterling Shepard (Giants)
47.Paul Richardson (Redskins)
46.Tyrell Williams (Chargers)
45.Jermaine Kearse (Jets)
44.Mohamed Sanu (Falcons)
43.Jamison Crowder (Redskins)
42.Mike Wallace (Eagles)
41.Kenny Stills (Dolphins)
40.Jordy Nelson (Raiders)
39.Josh Gordon (Browns)
38.Pierre Garcon (49ers)
37.Devin Funchess (Panthers)
36.Robby Anderson (Jets)
35.Sammy Watkins (Chiefs)
34.Cooper Kupp (Rams)
33.Marquise Goodwin (49ers)
32.Allen Robinson (Bears)
31.Julian Edelman (Patriots)
30.Michael Crabtree (Ravens)
29.Kelvin Benjamin (Bills)
28.Robert Woods (Rams)
27.Rishard Matthews (Titans)
26.JuJu Smith-Schuster (Steelers)
25.Emmanuel Sanders (Broncos)
24.Dez Bryant (Free Agent)
23.Amari Cooper (Raiders)
22.DeSean Jackson (Buccaneers)
21.Davante Adams (Packers)
20.Stefon Diggs (Vikings)
19.Marvin Jones Jr. (Lions)
18.Adam Thielen (Vikings)
17.Golden Tate (Lions)
16.Jarvis Landry (Browns)
15.Alshon Jeffrey (Eagles)
14.Brandin Cooks (Rams)
13.Demaryius Thomas (Broncos)
12.Tyreek Hill (Chiefs)
11.Larry Fitzgerald (Cardinals)
10.T.Y. Hilton (Colts)
9.Mike Evans (Buccaneers)
8.Keenan Allen (Chargers)
7.Doug Baldwin (Seahawks)
6.Michael Thomas (Saints)
5.A.J. Green (Bengals)
4.Julio Jones (Falcons)
3.Odell Beckham Jr. (Giants)
2.DeAndre Hopkins (Texans)
1.Antonio Brown (Steelers)
Monday, May 14, 2018
The Best and Worst of Terry Crews
“The Best and Worst of” series chronicles the career
highlights and lowlights of an actor starring in one of the week's
new theatrical releases. This week, I take a look at the filmography
of “Deadpool 2” star Terry Crews.
Films starring Terry Crews that I've seen:
Friday After Next
Malibu's Most Wanted
Starsky & Hutch
Soul Plane
White Chicks
The Longest Yard
The Benchwarmers
Hard Times
Idiocracy
Norbit
Balls of Fury
Street Kings
Get Smart
Terminator Salvation
Gamer
The Expendables
Middle Men
The Expendables 2
Draft Day
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2
Blended
The Expendables 3
Best Performance: The Longest Yard (2005)
From Chubbs to Crazy Eyes, colorful, scene-stealing side characters are a cornerstone of Adam Sandler movies. As a McDonald's-slinging inmate known as Cheeseburger Eddy, Crews held this vital role in The Longest Yard. Cheesburger Eddy was an early showcase for the great timing and willingness to commit to selling stupid jokes that has made Crews a reliably strong comedic presence over the past 15 years.
Worst Performance: Friday After Next (2002)
Friday After Next was a soul-sucking vortex for the abundance of funny people that were involved with it and Crews was no exception. In one of his first acting roles following his retirement from the NFL, Crews looks completely lost trying to salvage the series of weak jokes Ice Cube's janky script handed him.
Best Film: The Expendables 2 (2012)
As cool as it was to see a collection of high-profile action stars from across the globe share the screen in an R-rated blockbuster, The Expendables wasn't quite the over-the-top nostalgia bomb Sylvester Stallone promised it would be. Thankfully, the sequel ended up solving that problem. With its more self-aware tone, greater volume of excessive action scenes and a true scenery-chewing villain played by Jean-Claude Van Damme, The Expendables 2 was exactly the kind of preposterous, fun as hell throwback action flick that Stallone and co. set out to make when they started this franchise.
Worst Film: Soul Plane (2004)
Even with my love of all things absurd, I can't find much to like about Soul Plane. Outside of an unexpected death scene that's impossible to forget, this slapstick comedy that featured numerous future stars (Kevin Hart, Sofia Vergara, Crews) in prominent roles is a mostly painful ride through the friendly skies that is overly reliant on bad sex jokes and cheap stereotypes.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Solo: A Star Wars Story” star Thandie Newton.
Films starring Terry Crews that I've seen:
Friday After Next
Malibu's Most Wanted
Starsky & Hutch
Soul Plane
White Chicks
The Longest Yard
The Benchwarmers
Hard Times
Idiocracy
Norbit
Balls of Fury
Street Kings
Get Smart
Terminator Salvation
Gamer
The Expendables
Middle Men
The Expendables 2
Draft Day
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2
Blended
The Expendables 3
Best Performance: The Longest Yard (2005)
From Chubbs to Crazy Eyes, colorful, scene-stealing side characters are a cornerstone of Adam Sandler movies. As a McDonald's-slinging inmate known as Cheeseburger Eddy, Crews held this vital role in The Longest Yard. Cheesburger Eddy was an early showcase for the great timing and willingness to commit to selling stupid jokes that has made Crews a reliably strong comedic presence over the past 15 years.
Worst Performance: Friday After Next (2002)
Friday After Next was a soul-sucking vortex for the abundance of funny people that were involved with it and Crews was no exception. In one of his first acting roles following his retirement from the NFL, Crews looks completely lost trying to salvage the series of weak jokes Ice Cube's janky script handed him.
Best Film: The Expendables 2 (2012)
As cool as it was to see a collection of high-profile action stars from across the globe share the screen in an R-rated blockbuster, The Expendables wasn't quite the over-the-top nostalgia bomb Sylvester Stallone promised it would be. Thankfully, the sequel ended up solving that problem. With its more self-aware tone, greater volume of excessive action scenes and a true scenery-chewing villain played by Jean-Claude Van Damme, The Expendables 2 was exactly the kind of preposterous, fun as hell throwback action flick that Stallone and co. set out to make when they started this franchise.
Worst Film: Soul Plane (2004)
Even with my love of all things absurd, I can't find much to like about Soul Plane. Outside of an unexpected death scene that's impossible to forget, this slapstick comedy that featured numerous future stars (Kevin Hart, Sofia Vergara, Crews) in prominent roles is a mostly painful ride through the friendly skies that is overly reliant on bad sex jokes and cheap stereotypes.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Solo: A Star Wars Story” star Thandie Newton.
Thursday, May 10, 2018
2018 NFL Position Rankings: Top 50 Running Backs
50.Jalen Richard (Raiders)
49.Joe Mixon (Bengals)
48.Charles Sims (Buccaneers)
47.T.J. Yeldon (Jaguars)
46.Tarik Cohen (Bears)
45.Alfred Morris (Cowboys)
44.Jonathan Stewart (Giants)
43.Orleans Darkwa (Free Agent)
42.Theo Riddick (Lions)
41.Javorious Allen (Ravens)
40.Corey Clement (Eagles)
39.Samjae Perine (Redskins)
38.Jeremy Hill (Patriots)
37.Doug Martin (Raiders)
36.Dalvin Cook (Vikings)
35.Kenyan Drake (Dolphins)
34.Christian McCaffery (Panthers)
33.Giovani Bernard (Bengals)
32.James White (Patriots)
31.Jerick McKinnon (49ers)
30.Bilal Powell (Jets)
29.DeMarco Murray (Free Agent)
28.LeGarrette Blount (Lions)
27.Spencer Ware (Chiefs)
26.Isaiah Crowell (Jets)
25.Duke Johnson Jr. (Browns)
24.Chris Thompson (Redskins)
23.Latavius Murray (Vikings)
22.Carlos Hyde (Browns)
21.Alex Collins (Ravens)
20.Marshawn Lynch (Raiders)
19.Frank Gore (Dolphins)
18.Tevin Coleman (Falcons)
17.Derrick Henry (Titans)
16.C.J. Anderson (Panthers)
15.Dion Lewis (Titans)
14.Melvin Gordon (Chargers)
13.Leonard Fournette (Jaguars)
12.Jay Ajayi (Eagles)
11.Lamar Miller (Texans)
10.Mark Ingram (Saints)
9.Jordan Howard (Bears)
8.Kareem Hunt (Chiefs)
7.Alvin Kamara (Saints)
6.LeSean McCoy (Bills)
5.Devonta Freeman (Falcons)
4.Ezekiel Elliott (Cowboys)
3.David Johnson (Cardinals)
2.Todd Gurley (Rams)
1.Le'Veon Bell (Steelers)
49.Joe Mixon (Bengals)
48.Charles Sims (Buccaneers)
47.T.J. Yeldon (Jaguars)
46.Tarik Cohen (Bears)
45.Alfred Morris (Cowboys)
44.Jonathan Stewart (Giants)
43.Orleans Darkwa (Free Agent)
42.Theo Riddick (Lions)
41.Javorious Allen (Ravens)
40.Corey Clement (Eagles)
39.Samjae Perine (Redskins)
38.Jeremy Hill (Patriots)
37.Doug Martin (Raiders)
36.Dalvin Cook (Vikings)
35.Kenyan Drake (Dolphins)
34.Christian McCaffery (Panthers)
33.Giovani Bernard (Bengals)
32.James White (Patriots)
31.Jerick McKinnon (49ers)
30.Bilal Powell (Jets)
29.DeMarco Murray (Free Agent)
28.LeGarrette Blount (Lions)
27.Spencer Ware (Chiefs)
26.Isaiah Crowell (Jets)
25.Duke Johnson Jr. (Browns)
24.Chris Thompson (Redskins)
23.Latavius Murray (Vikings)
22.Carlos Hyde (Browns)
21.Alex Collins (Ravens)
20.Marshawn Lynch (Raiders)
19.Frank Gore (Dolphins)
18.Tevin Coleman (Falcons)
17.Derrick Henry (Titans)
16.C.J. Anderson (Panthers)
15.Dion Lewis (Titans)
14.Melvin Gordon (Chargers)
13.Leonard Fournette (Jaguars)
12.Jay Ajayi (Eagles)
11.Lamar Miller (Texans)
10.Mark Ingram (Saints)
9.Jordan Howard (Bears)
8.Kareem Hunt (Chiefs)
7.Alvin Kamara (Saints)
6.LeSean McCoy (Bills)
5.Devonta Freeman (Falcons)
4.Ezekiel Elliott (Cowboys)
3.David Johnson (Cardinals)
2.Todd Gurley (Rams)
1.Le'Veon Bell (Steelers)
Wednesday, May 9, 2018
The Best and Worst of Gabrielle Union
“The Best and Worst of” series chronicles the career
highlights and lowlights of an actor starring in one of the week's
new theatrical releases. This week, I take a look at the filmography
of “Breaking In” star Gabrielle Union.
Films starring Gabrielle Union that I've seen:
10 Things I Hate About You
Bring It On
Cradle 2 the Grave
Bad Boys II
The Honeymooners
Meet Dave
Cadillac Records
Top Five
The Birth of a Nation
Sleepless
Best Performance: Top Five (2014)
Anytime an actor disappears so far into a role that you forget they're acting is wildly impressive and that's exactly what Union pulled off in Top Five. As the reality star fiancé of actor Andre Allen (Chris Rock), Union captures the narcissism, greed, fame-chasing and overwhelming desire to project a life of perfection to the general public that drives individuals that agree to have every minute of their life caught on camera with an eerie degree of accuracy.
Worst Performance: Sleepless (2017)
I don't know if it was because she lost the action movie chops she displayed in the early stages of her career or this was simply a poorly-constructed character, but Union kind of stunk in Sleepless. Union was the only member of this crime thriller's ensemble that refused to embrace the schlocky vibe that naturally comes with a "mobsters kidnap the teenage son of a dirty cop after a drug deal gone bad" plot, which made her scenes relatively hard to buy into.
Best Film: Top Five (2014)
Over two decades into a film career that hasn't exactly been rife with quality projects, Chris Rock finally made his masterpiece with Top Five. The standup icon's third directorial effort is a brilliant meditation on relationships, addiction, self-doubt and the hollowness of fame that showcases why he's one of the smartest comic minds to ever walk the earth.
Worst Film: Bring It On (2000)
Bring It On isn't so much a bad film as it is one that doesn't line up with my personal taste. Peyton Reed's cult comedy hit didn't have enough laughs or likable characters to offset my complete disinterest in the world of competitive cheerleading.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Deadpool 2” star Terry Crews.
Films starring Gabrielle Union that I've seen:
10 Things I Hate About You
Bring It On
Cradle 2 the Grave
Bad Boys II
The Honeymooners
Meet Dave
Cadillac Records
Top Five
The Birth of a Nation
Sleepless
Best Performance: Top Five (2014)
Anytime an actor disappears so far into a role that you forget they're acting is wildly impressive and that's exactly what Union pulled off in Top Five. As the reality star fiancé of actor Andre Allen (Chris Rock), Union captures the narcissism, greed, fame-chasing and overwhelming desire to project a life of perfection to the general public that drives individuals that agree to have every minute of their life caught on camera with an eerie degree of accuracy.
Worst Performance: Sleepless (2017)
I don't know if it was because she lost the action movie chops she displayed in the early stages of her career or this was simply a poorly-constructed character, but Union kind of stunk in Sleepless. Union was the only member of this crime thriller's ensemble that refused to embrace the schlocky vibe that naturally comes with a "mobsters kidnap the teenage son of a dirty cop after a drug deal gone bad" plot, which made her scenes relatively hard to buy into.
Best Film: Top Five (2014)
Over two decades into a film career that hasn't exactly been rife with quality projects, Chris Rock finally made his masterpiece with Top Five. The standup icon's third directorial effort is a brilliant meditation on relationships, addiction, self-doubt and the hollowness of fame that showcases why he's one of the smartest comic minds to ever walk the earth.
Worst Film: Bring It On (2000)
Bring It On isn't so much a bad film as it is one that doesn't line up with my personal taste. Peyton Reed's cult comedy hit didn't have enough laughs or likable characters to offset my complete disinterest in the world of competitive cheerleading.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Deadpool 2” star Terry Crews.
Tuesday, May 8, 2018
Concert Review: Turnstile-- Boston, MA-- May 7th, 2018
Lineup: Turnstile/Touche Amore/Culture Abuse/Razorbumps
Venue: Paradise Rock Club, Boston, MA
Date: May 7th, 2018
Razorbumps: Full disclosure: My score for Razorbumps went up once Jeremy Bolm from Touche Amore mentioned it was their first national tour ever. Their off-kilter brand of punk wasn't overly appealing to me, but they brought a level of poise and presence to the stage that you don't typically see from a band that's just starting out. While I wouldn't put them down as a lock to blow up, they definitely have the chops to enjoy a long, steady career in the industry.
Culture Abuse: Outside of their vocalist trying way too hard to be funny, Culture Abuse was pretty decent. Their bouncy hybrid of pop punk and hardcore made for a briskly entertaining albeit not overly memorable set that offered a brief preview of the infections energy that the bands that followed delivered in spades.
Touche Amore: LA's kings of melancholy post-hardcore were the catalyst behind my decision to attend this show and they did not disappoint. Having a passionate crowd to feed off made the emotional content of their music even more powerful than it is on record and Jeremy Bolm is a terrific frontman that pours every ounce of his soul onto the stage. Very glad to have finally checked Touche Amore off of my bucket list and I look forward to seeing them again in the future.
Turnstile: As an outsider to the hardcore scene, this performance helped me understand why Turnstile has developed such a rabid following over the past few years. Their 45-minute set was a bullshit-free wave of intensity that emphasized and enhanced the strengths of their music. By keeping the between-song banter/crowdwork to a bare minimum, they were able to build up an impressive stream of momentum that maximized the effectiveness of their frantic, groove-based sound and create an atmosphere of good-spirited madness that their diehard fans ate up. These guys are natural-born performers and as long as they don't lose sight of the organic punk attitude that has made them the most respected act in modern hardcore, Turnstile should continue to set this genre ablaze for quite some time.
Scores:
Razorbumps 6/10
Culture Abuse 7/10
Touche Amore 8/10
Turnstile 8/10
Setlists:
Touche Amore:
~
Rapture
Just Exist
Pathfinder
Flowers and You
And Now It's Happening in Mine
Uppers/Downers
Amends
Palm Dreams
The Great Repetition
Displacement
Green
Honest Sleep
Turnstile:
Bomb
Come Back for More (intro only)
Canned Heat
Real Thing
Big Smile
Gravity
Generator
The Thing You Do
Pushing Me Away
I Don't Wanna Be Blind
Drop
Moon
Death Grip
High Pressure
Fazed Out
Blue by You
7
Keep It Moving
Monday, May 7, 2018
2018 NFL Position Rankings: Top 25 Quarterbacks
Early-to-mid May is the worst time of year for NFL fans. The excitement (or in some cases, agony) that stemmed from the flurry of offseason personnel moves has subsided and it's still about four months until any meaningful games are played. Since 2012, I've taken advantage of this dead period in the professional football calendar to release my Position Ranking Series. This series offers me a chance to evaluate the top talent around the league while also (hopefully) providing fans with some cheap entertainment as they wait patiently for the upcoming season. Check back frequently in the coming weeks as I unveil my picks for the best players at each position on offense, defense and special teams, starting today with quarterback.
Notes and rules for the 2018 NFL Position Ranking Series:
1.Rookies are excluded from these rankings
2.Each player is judged on where they currently stand in my opinion, not the player they once were, are going to be, etc.
3.Each player is listed as a member of the team they will play for during the 2018 season.
4.Special note for the QB rankings: Since there's no timetable for his return and plenty of question marks surrounding how he'll look if he does in fact line up under center at some point during the upcoming season, I've decide to exclude Andrew Luck from this year's rankings.
25.Joe Flacco (Ravens)
24.Blake Bortles (Jaguars)
23.Deshaun Watson (Texans)
22.Tyrod Taylor (Browns)
21.Jimmy Garoppolo (49ers)
20.Nick Foles (Eagles)
19.Dak Prescott (Cowboys)
18.Andy Dalton (Bengals)
17.Jameis Winston (Buccaneers)
16.Derek Carr (Raiders)
15.Eli Manning (Giants)
14.Marcus Mariota (Titans)
13.Jared Goff (Rams)
12.Alex Smith (Redskins)
11.Phillip Rivers (Chargers)
10.Kirk Cousins (Vikings)
9.Matthew Stafford (Lions)
8.Cam Newton (Panthers)
7.Carson Wentz (Eagles)
6.Ben Roethlisberger (Steelers)
5.Matt Ryan (Falcons)
4.Drew Brees (Saints)
3.Russell Wilson (Seahawks)
2.Aaron Rodgers (Packers)
1.Tom Brady (Patriots)
Notes and rules for the 2018 NFL Position Ranking Series:
1.Rookies are excluded from these rankings
2.Each player is judged on where they currently stand in my opinion, not the player they once were, are going to be, etc.
3.Each player is listed as a member of the team they will play for during the 2018 season.
4.Special note for the QB rankings: Since there's no timetable for his return and plenty of question marks surrounding how he'll look if he does in fact line up under center at some point during the upcoming season, I've decide to exclude Andrew Luck from this year's rankings.
25.Joe Flacco (Ravens)
24.Blake Bortles (Jaguars)
23.Deshaun Watson (Texans)
22.Tyrod Taylor (Browns)
21.Jimmy Garoppolo (49ers)
20.Nick Foles (Eagles)
19.Dak Prescott (Cowboys)
18.Andy Dalton (Bengals)
17.Jameis Winston (Buccaneers)
16.Derek Carr (Raiders)
15.Eli Manning (Giants)
14.Marcus Mariota (Titans)
13.Jared Goff (Rams)
12.Alex Smith (Redskins)
11.Phillip Rivers (Chargers)
10.Kirk Cousins (Vikings)
9.Matthew Stafford (Lions)
8.Cam Newton (Panthers)
7.Carson Wentz (Eagles)
6.Ben Roethlisberger (Steelers)
5.Matt Ryan (Falcons)
4.Drew Brees (Saints)
3.Russell Wilson (Seahawks)
2.Aaron Rodgers (Packers)
1.Tom Brady (Patriots)
Friday, May 4, 2018
The Best and Worst of Anna Faris
“The Best and Worst of” series chronicles the career
highlights and lowlights of an actor starring in one of the week's
new theatrical releases. This week, I take a look at the filmography
of “Overboard” star Anna Faris.
Films starring Anna Faris that I've seen:
Scary Movie
Scary Movie 2
The Hot Chick
Lost in Translation
Scary Movie 3
Waiting...
Just Friends
Scary Movie 4
Observe and Report
Take Me Home Tonight
What's Your Number?
The Dictator
Movie 43
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2
Keanu
Best Performance: Just Friends (2005)
I'd contend that this role is what helped Faris gain so much respect in comedy circles. Her manic performance as psychotic, narcissistic up-and-coming pop star Samantha James single-handedly helped elevate Just Friends from mediocre to legimately funny.
Worst Performance: What's Your Number? (2011)
It took me until her unforgettable extended cameo in Keanu to forgive Faris for this atrocity. The crippling absence of her usual superb timing paired with an abundant lack of chemistry with love interest Chris Evans made this an epic stinker for the grizzled comedy vet.
Best Film: Keanu (2016)
If there was any doubt that Keegan Michael-Key and Jordan Peele weren't capable of thriving outside of the world of sketch comedy, Keanu shattered it. The cult comedy duo successfully brought their off-the-charts chemistry and absurd yet intelligent brand of humor to the big screen with this consistently hilarious romp about a pair of nerdy 30-something guys (Key and Peele) that pose as hitmen in order to get their beloved cat back from a powerful gang leader (Method Man). While it's unlikely considering the success of Get Out and his recent comments about wanting to solely focus on directing for the rest of his career, I hope that Peele will reunite with Key in front of the camera at some point over the next few years.
Worst Film: What's Your Number? (2011)
Outside of Sweet Home Alabama, I don't think I've ever seen a romantic comedy that was as lazy, unfunny and soulless as What's Your Number? How the casting director got so many talented actors with comedy backgrounds (Faris, Ari Graynor, Ed Begley Jr., Blythe Danner, Joel McHale, Chris Pratt, Andy Samberg) to agree to appear in a film that includes such side-splitting shit as women tripping in fancy wedding dresses, a vulgar ringtone going off in a formal situation and flashbacks featuring pretty people in fat suits is a staggering feat that I'll never be able to comprehend.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Breaking In” star Gabrielle Union.
Films starring Anna Faris that I've seen:
Scary Movie
Scary Movie 2
The Hot Chick
Lost in Translation
Scary Movie 3
Waiting...
Just Friends
Scary Movie 4
Observe and Report
Take Me Home Tonight
What's Your Number?
The Dictator
Movie 43
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2
Keanu
Best Performance: Just Friends (2005)
I'd contend that this role is what helped Faris gain so much respect in comedy circles. Her manic performance as psychotic, narcissistic up-and-coming pop star Samantha James single-handedly helped elevate Just Friends from mediocre to legimately funny.
Worst Performance: What's Your Number? (2011)
It took me until her unforgettable extended cameo in Keanu to forgive Faris for this atrocity. The crippling absence of her usual superb timing paired with an abundant lack of chemistry with love interest Chris Evans made this an epic stinker for the grizzled comedy vet.
Best Film: Keanu (2016)
If there was any doubt that Keegan Michael-Key and Jordan Peele weren't capable of thriving outside of the world of sketch comedy, Keanu shattered it. The cult comedy duo successfully brought their off-the-charts chemistry and absurd yet intelligent brand of humor to the big screen with this consistently hilarious romp about a pair of nerdy 30-something guys (Key and Peele) that pose as hitmen in order to get their beloved cat back from a powerful gang leader (Method Man). While it's unlikely considering the success of Get Out and his recent comments about wanting to solely focus on directing for the rest of his career, I hope that Peele will reunite with Key in front of the camera at some point over the next few years.
Worst Film: What's Your Number? (2011)
Outside of Sweet Home Alabama, I don't think I've ever seen a romantic comedy that was as lazy, unfunny and soulless as What's Your Number? How the casting director got so many talented actors with comedy backgrounds (Faris, Ari Graynor, Ed Begley Jr., Blythe Danner, Joel McHale, Chris Pratt, Andy Samberg) to agree to appear in a film that includes such side-splitting shit as women tripping in fancy wedding dresses, a vulgar ringtone going off in a formal situation and flashbacks featuring pretty people in fat suits is a staggering feat that I'll never be able to comprehend.
Thank you for reading this week's edition of “The Best and Worst of”. The next victim of my praise and ire will be “Breaking In” star Gabrielle Union.
Thursday, May 3, 2018
10 Most Anticipated Albums of Summer 2018
10.Skeletonwitch-Devouring Radiant Light (Release Date: July 20th)
9.Pusha T-King Push (Release Date: May 25th)
8.State Champs-Living Proof (Release Date: June 15th)
7.Drake-Scorpion (Release Date: TBD June)
6.Dance Gavin Dance-Artificial Selection (Release Date: June 8th)
5.Brockhampton-Puppy (Release Date: TBD June)
4.Ariana Grande-Sweetener (Release Date: July 20th)
3.Death Grips-Year of the Snitch (Release Date: TBD)
2.Between the Buried and Me-Automata II (Release Date: July 13th)
1.Revocation-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Also looking forward to:
Parkway Drive-Reverence (Release Date: May 4th)
Rae Sremmurd-SR3MM (Release Date: May 4th)
Bad Wolves-Disobey (Release Date: May 11th)
At the Gates-To Drink From the Night Itself (Release Date: May 18th)
Burn the Priest-Legion: XX (Release Date May 18th)
Kyle-Light of Mine (Release Date: May 18th)
Hoobastank-Push Pull (Release Date: May 25th)
Jorja Smith-Lost & Found (Release Date: June 8th)
Nas-TBD (Release Date: June 15th)
Florence + the Machine-High as Hope (Release Date: June 29th)
The Agony Scene-Tormentor (Release Date: July 20th)
Scars on Broadway-Dictator (Release Date: July 20th)
Future-Superfly Soundtrack (Release Date: TBD May/June)
A$AP Rocky-Testing (Release Date: TBD)
Born of Osiris-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Denzel Curry-Taboo (Release Date: TBD)
Gucci Mane, Lil Yachty and Migos-Glacier Boyz (Release Date: TBD)
High on Fire-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Lil Pump-Harvard Dropout (Release Date: TBD)
ScHoolboy Q-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
YG-Stay Dangerous (Release Date: TBD)
9.Pusha T-King Push (Release Date: May 25th)
8.State Champs-Living Proof (Release Date: June 15th)
7.Drake-Scorpion (Release Date: TBD June)
6.Dance Gavin Dance-Artificial Selection (Release Date: June 8th)
5.Brockhampton-Puppy (Release Date: TBD June)
4.Ariana Grande-Sweetener (Release Date: July 20th)
3.Death Grips-Year of the Snitch (Release Date: TBD)
2.Between the Buried and Me-Automata II (Release Date: July 13th)
1.Revocation-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Also looking forward to:
Parkway Drive-Reverence (Release Date: May 4th)
Rae Sremmurd-SR3MM (Release Date: May 4th)
Bad Wolves-Disobey (Release Date: May 11th)
At the Gates-To Drink From the Night Itself (Release Date: May 18th)
Burn the Priest-Legion: XX (Release Date May 18th)
Kyle-Light of Mine (Release Date: May 18th)
Hoobastank-Push Pull (Release Date: May 25th)
Jorja Smith-Lost & Found (Release Date: June 8th)
Nas-TBD (Release Date: June 15th)
Florence + the Machine-High as Hope (Release Date: June 29th)
The Agony Scene-Tormentor (Release Date: July 20th)
Scars on Broadway-Dictator (Release Date: July 20th)
Future-Superfly Soundtrack (Release Date: TBD May/June)
A$AP Rocky-Testing (Release Date: TBD)
Born of Osiris-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Denzel Curry-Taboo (Release Date: TBD)
Gucci Mane, Lil Yachty and Migos-Glacier Boyz (Release Date: TBD)
High on Fire-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
Lil Pump-Harvard Dropout (Release Date: TBD)
ScHoolboy Q-TBD (Release Date: TBD)
YG-Stay Dangerous (Release Date: TBD)
Wednesday, May 2, 2018
10 Most Anticipated Films of Summer 2018
One of the most magical times of the year is almost here! That's right kids, the official start of summer movie season is just a mere 36 hours away. 2018's slate of high-profile sequels, Sundance-acquired indie fare and mid-tier original dice rolls will look to top a pretty impressive 2017 slate that delivered a number of gems (Baby Driver, The Big Sick, Ingrid Goes West, Spider-Man: Homecoming, Wind River) while also attempting to continue the near-constant level of excellence that this year's winter/spring releases have displayed. Here are the 10 films from May-August's densely-packed release schedule that I'm most looking forward to seeing.
10.Sorry to Bother You (7/6): There were several titles, including Ant-Man and the Wasp, Mission-Impossible: Fallout and The Spy Who Dumped Me, in contention for this spot, but the potential insanity factor gave Sorry to Bother You the slight edge over the rest of the field. While the trailer makes it look a lot more restrained than I expected, I'm excited to see Atlanta scene stealer Lakeith Stanfield get his long-deserved opportunity to lead a project and notoriously gonzo musician Boots Riley try his hand at filmmaking.
9.Solo: A Star Wars Story (5/25): Despite only really enjoying one of the last six entries in the canon, I plan on seeing Solo on opening weekend. The mid-production director change and subsequent extended reshoots are notable red flags that can't be ignored, but the primary cast (Alden Ehrenreich, Woody Harrelson, Emilia Clarke, Donald Glover, Thandie Newton) is very appealing and it'll be cool to see Han Solo return to the screen after watching Oscar Issac play the dollar store version of the legendary smuggler over the past few years.
8.The First Purge (7/4): This overtly political action horror franchise has significantly improved with each subsequent installment and I look forward to seeing if the origin story can continue that impressive trend.
7.Ocean's 8 (6/8): As underwhelmed as I was by the first trailer that dropped back in December, I'm starting to really come around to the idea of another Ocean's film. Co-writer/director Gary Ross (The Hunger Games, Seabiscuit) has a pretty strong track record of delivering entertaining blockbusters, the titular band of thieves largely consists of charismatic actors (Sandra Bullock, Cate Blanchett, Sarah Paulson, Mindy Kaling, Rihanna) that should be fun to spend a couple of hours with and the Met Ball is an absolutely perfect place to stage the type of elaborate heist this franchise is known for.
6.American Animals (6/1): Heist film mania continues!!!! This fact-based Sundance acquisition starring American Horror Story cornerstone Evan Peters looks like a unique, eccentric and super fun take on a subgenre that I almost always love.
5.Deadpool 2 (5/18): I've never been this excited for a sequel to a film that disappointed me to such a soul-crushing degree. Every single piece of promotional material has been a home run, director David Leitch (Atomic Blonde, John Wick) is an elite action scene choreographer and Josh Brolin, fresh off a great performance in a little indie film called Avengers: Infinity War, is a strong bet to solve the anonymous jabroni villain problem that played a pivotal role in dragging down the original.
4.Hotel Artemis (6/8): An ensemble action flick set in a members-only hospital for criminals starring the likes of Jodie Foster, Dave Bautista, Charlie Day, Jenny Slate and Jeff Goldblum is perhaps the closest a studio has come to sending me a personalized invitation to go see one of their movies. In all seriousness, I'll be legitimately offended if Hotel Artemis doesn't at least end up being the almost-as-good cousin of John Wick.
3.Tag (6/15): Summer is the best time of year to drop R-rated comedies and none of this summer's (sadly) small batch of titles is more intriguing to me than Tag. Having Jon Hamm, Hannibal Burress, Jake Johnson, Ed Helms, Jeremy Renner, Isla Fisher and several other funny people play a high-stakes game of tag for 90 minutes could yield a ton of dumb laughs.
2.Upgrade (6/1): This year's South by Southwest Midnighters Audience Award winner from Saw scribe Leigh Whanell centered around a widow (Logan Marshall-Green) that turns into a superhuman killing machine once he gets an experimental computer chip implanted in his spine looks like it has the makings to be the type of ultraviolent B-action grimefest that Hollywood doesn't make nearly enough of anymore.
1.Sicario: Day of the Soldado (6/29): While the absence of Emily Blunt and Denis Vileneuve is admittedly pretty disappointing, I'm still really hyped for the second chapter of the Sicario saga. The original was one of my favorite crime thrillers in recent memory and I have complete faith in screenwriter Taylor Sheridan's (Hell or High Water, Wind River) ability to craft a worthwhile follow-up to the film that helped establish him as one of the industry's most exciting talents.
Also interested in:
Tully (5/4)
Beast (5/11)
Life of the Party (5/11)
Revenge (5/11)
Terminal (5/11)
Cargo (5/18)
On Chesil Beach (5/18)
Ibiza (5/25)
Action Point (6/1)
Adrift (6/1)
Alex Strangelove (6/8)
Hearts Beat Loud (6/8)
Hereditary (6/8)
A Kid Like Jake (6/8)
Won't You Be My Neighbor? (6/8)
Superfly (6/15)
The Yellow Birds (6/15)
Damsel (6/22)
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (6/22)
Under the Silver Lake (6/22)
Leave No Trace (6/29)
Uncle Drew (6/29)
Woman Walks Ahead (6/29)
Ant-Man and the Wasp (7/6)
The Legacy of a Whitetail Deer Hunter (7/6)
Don't Worry, He Won't Get Far on Foot (7/13)
Eight Grade (7/13)
Skyscraper (7/13)
Blindspotting (7/20)
The Equalizer 2 (7/20)
Mission-Impossible: Fallout (7/27)
Mile 22 (8/3)
The Miseducation of Cameron Post (8/3)
The Spy Who Dumped Me (8/3)
BlacKkKlansman (8/10)
The Meg (8/10)
A Prayer Before Dawn (8/10)
The Happytime Murders (8/17)
Juliet, Naked (8/17)
Three Seconds (8/17)
Replicas (8/24)
Kin (8/31)
10.Sorry to Bother You (7/6): There were several titles, including Ant-Man and the Wasp, Mission-Impossible: Fallout and The Spy Who Dumped Me, in contention for this spot, but the potential insanity factor gave Sorry to Bother You the slight edge over the rest of the field. While the trailer makes it look a lot more restrained than I expected, I'm excited to see Atlanta scene stealer Lakeith Stanfield get his long-deserved opportunity to lead a project and notoriously gonzo musician Boots Riley try his hand at filmmaking.
9.Solo: A Star Wars Story (5/25): Despite only really enjoying one of the last six entries in the canon, I plan on seeing Solo on opening weekend. The mid-production director change and subsequent extended reshoots are notable red flags that can't be ignored, but the primary cast (Alden Ehrenreich, Woody Harrelson, Emilia Clarke, Donald Glover, Thandie Newton) is very appealing and it'll be cool to see Han Solo return to the screen after watching Oscar Issac play the dollar store version of the legendary smuggler over the past few years.
8.The First Purge (7/4): This overtly political action horror franchise has significantly improved with each subsequent installment and I look forward to seeing if the origin story can continue that impressive trend.
7.Ocean's 8 (6/8): As underwhelmed as I was by the first trailer that dropped back in December, I'm starting to really come around to the idea of another Ocean's film. Co-writer/director Gary Ross (The Hunger Games, Seabiscuit) has a pretty strong track record of delivering entertaining blockbusters, the titular band of thieves largely consists of charismatic actors (Sandra Bullock, Cate Blanchett, Sarah Paulson, Mindy Kaling, Rihanna) that should be fun to spend a couple of hours with and the Met Ball is an absolutely perfect place to stage the type of elaborate heist this franchise is known for.
6.American Animals (6/1): Heist film mania continues!!!! This fact-based Sundance acquisition starring American Horror Story cornerstone Evan Peters looks like a unique, eccentric and super fun take on a subgenre that I almost always love.
5.Deadpool 2 (5/18): I've never been this excited for a sequel to a film that disappointed me to such a soul-crushing degree. Every single piece of promotional material has been a home run, director David Leitch (Atomic Blonde, John Wick) is an elite action scene choreographer and Josh Brolin, fresh off a great performance in a little indie film called Avengers: Infinity War, is a strong bet to solve the anonymous jabroni villain problem that played a pivotal role in dragging down the original.
4.Hotel Artemis (6/8): An ensemble action flick set in a members-only hospital for criminals starring the likes of Jodie Foster, Dave Bautista, Charlie Day, Jenny Slate and Jeff Goldblum is perhaps the closest a studio has come to sending me a personalized invitation to go see one of their movies. In all seriousness, I'll be legitimately offended if Hotel Artemis doesn't at least end up being the almost-as-good cousin of John Wick.
3.Tag (6/15): Summer is the best time of year to drop R-rated comedies and none of this summer's (sadly) small batch of titles is more intriguing to me than Tag. Having Jon Hamm, Hannibal Burress, Jake Johnson, Ed Helms, Jeremy Renner, Isla Fisher and several other funny people play a high-stakes game of tag for 90 minutes could yield a ton of dumb laughs.
2.Upgrade (6/1): This year's South by Southwest Midnighters Audience Award winner from Saw scribe Leigh Whanell centered around a widow (Logan Marshall-Green) that turns into a superhuman killing machine once he gets an experimental computer chip implanted in his spine looks like it has the makings to be the type of ultraviolent B-action grimefest that Hollywood doesn't make nearly enough of anymore.
1.Sicario: Day of the Soldado (6/29): While the absence of Emily Blunt and Denis Vileneuve is admittedly pretty disappointing, I'm still really hyped for the second chapter of the Sicario saga. The original was one of my favorite crime thrillers in recent memory and I have complete faith in screenwriter Taylor Sheridan's (Hell or High Water, Wind River) ability to craft a worthwhile follow-up to the film that helped establish him as one of the industry's most exciting talents.
Also interested in:
Tully (5/4)
Beast (5/11)
Life of the Party (5/11)
Revenge (5/11)
Terminal (5/11)
Cargo (5/18)
On Chesil Beach (5/18)
Ibiza (5/25)
Action Point (6/1)
Adrift (6/1)
Alex Strangelove (6/8)
Hearts Beat Loud (6/8)
Hereditary (6/8)
A Kid Like Jake (6/8)
Won't You Be My Neighbor? (6/8)
Superfly (6/15)
The Yellow Birds (6/15)
Damsel (6/22)
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (6/22)
Under the Silver Lake (6/22)
Leave No Trace (6/29)
Uncle Drew (6/29)
Woman Walks Ahead (6/29)
Ant-Man and the Wasp (7/6)
The Legacy of a Whitetail Deer Hunter (7/6)
Don't Worry, He Won't Get Far on Foot (7/13)
Eight Grade (7/13)
Skyscraper (7/13)
Blindspotting (7/20)
The Equalizer 2 (7/20)
Mission-Impossible: Fallout (7/27)
Mile 22 (8/3)
The Miseducation of Cameron Post (8/3)
The Spy Who Dumped Me (8/3)
BlacKkKlansman (8/10)
The Meg (8/10)
A Prayer Before Dawn (8/10)
The Happytime Murders (8/17)
Juliet, Naked (8/17)
Three Seconds (8/17)
Replicas (8/24)
Kin (8/31)
Tuesday, May 1, 2018
Movie Review: Avengers: Infinity War
Those secretive fatcats at Marvel actually did it!!! Avengers: Infinity War is the streamlined, genuinely epic 10 years-in-the-making event film that I never in a million years expected the comic book juggernaut to pull off. While it might not the "most ambitious crossover event in history" (that title still goes to Scooby Doo Meets the Harlem Globetrotters), Infinity War has a secret weapon that all of its predecessors lacked: an imposing villain. Thanos, who is played with maximum menace by Josh Brolin, feels like a legitimate threat to the abundance of species that are present in this universe. The fact that this legion of united heroes are in real danger for the entire film ups the emotional stakes while also establishing a true edge-of-your seat feeling that made every moment wildly compelling. It's going to be really difficult to wait a full year to see how this bleak, engrossing and dense yet never overwhelming story concludes.
Grade: A
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