Pixar Ranked

Welcome to the latest edition of "Ranked"-where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out related accolades. This week, I'm profiling the work of animation juggernaut Pixar.

Pixar's Filmography Ranked:

Haven't seen: Cars, Cars 3, The Good Dinosaur, Incredibles 2  

19.The Incredibles (D+)

18.Cars 2 (C-)

17.A Bug's Life (C-)

16.Onward (C)

15.Inside Out (C)

14.Wall-E (C)

13.Brave (B-)

12.Monsters University (B)

11.Finding Dory (B)

10.Ratatouille (B)

9.Finding Nemo (B)

8.Toy Story 2 (B+)

7.Toy Story 4 (A-)

6.Monsters Inc. (A-)

5.Up (A-)

4.Coco (A-)

3.Soul (A)

2.Toy Story 3 (A)

1.Toy Story (A+)

Top Dog: Toy Story (1995)

It's not a particularly astute or original observation to note that Pixar has amassed an impressive filmography that is full of beloved titles that have gone onto become classics. Of the many gems they've mined over the years, their inaugural film still shines brightest to me. While nostalgia unquestionably plays a role in my admiration for it, Toy Story is mostly so special because it cemented the Pixar formula of constant laughs, stunning visuals and a huge heart within a story that appeals to kids and adults alike and to date, has done it better than anything else they've put out.    

Lowlight: The Incredibles (2004)

I'm well aware that not liking The Incredibles is a wildly unpopular take since it's been firmly established as one of Pixar's beloved films for at least 15 years. To me, The Incredibles marks the only occasion to date where Pixar got literally nothing right on a project. It basically just takes the hallmarks of a bad superhero project (flat heroes, cheesy villain, meandering plot) then adds some kid-friendly jokes and attempts to pull at the heartstrings that wouldn't be out of place in an offering from another animation studio that soullessly tried to mimic Pixar's formula. There isn't a laugh, smile or even a hint of sincere emotion to be found here-which makes it a complete betrayal of the defining characteristics of the brand that produced it.   

Most Overrated: The Incredibles (2004)

See above.

Most Underrated: Toy Story 4 (2019)

Was Toy Story 4 a completely necessary film? No. Toy Story 3 would've been an incredible, bittersweet note to end on if they had chosen to. Does this mean Toy Story 4 wasn't worthwhile? Far from it. It's a very entertaining, frequently hilarious adventure with great new characters (miserable runaway spork Forky voiced by Tony Hale, chaotic carnival prizes Ducky and Bunny voiced by Keegan Michael-Key and Jordan Peele, the scene-stealing inept Canadian stuntman Duke Kaboom voiced by Keanu Reeves), a satisfying re-introduction to the Bo Peep character (voiced by Annie Potts) that was absent from Toy Story 3 for no previously explained reason and an emotionally potent ending that feels like a firm ending for this brilliant franchise (for real this time!).  

The Only Pixar Title That Reduced Me to a Puddle: Coco (2017)

Since exiting the early years of childhood, I've hardly ever cried. To put it simply, tears are just not how I traditionally express myself when I'm sad. However, if you had happened to be in my house while I was watching Coco for the first time, you would've thought I wept on the regular. The final sequence where Miguel returns from The Land of the Dead and sings "Remember Me" for his great-grandmother Coco literally destroyed me since it reminded me of my relationship with my grandfather-who had passed in 2012. I've lost my grandmother as well during the time since I've watched Coco last, so a return to Waterworld would likely be in the cards if/when I choose to rewatch it. 

Most Puzzled I've Been by People Crying at a Pixar Movie: Inside Out (2015)

Now here's where I cement myself as the cold, heartless prick I truly am... Seemingly every few months or so, somebody will tweet out something like "What's one movie moment that always makes you cry?" and one of the most frequent replies to those posts is the scene from Inside Out where Riley's childhood imaginary friend Bing Bong (voiced by Richard Kind) falls into the "memory dump" in her brain and becomes permanently forgotten. My response to this is always the same: Really? How the "death" of a teenage girl's already basically forgotten imaginary friend that has maybe 10 minutes of screen time in the entire time managed to fuck up so many people's emotions is just something that I will never be able to comprehend.