Thursday, October 31, 2024

Stanley Tucci Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a filmography or franchise from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Stanley Tucci-whose latest project "Conclave" is in theaters now.  

Stanley Tucci's Filmography Ranked:

24.Jolt (D+)

23.Transformers: The Last Knight (D+)

22.Beethoven (C-)

21.Transformers: Age of Extinction (C-)

20.Big Trouble (C-)

19.Maid in Manhattan (C)

18.Robots (C)

17.Julie & Julia (C)

16.Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody (C+)

15.Captain America: The First Avenger (C+)

14.Wild Card (C+)

13.The Daytrippers (B-)

12.The Devil Wears Prada (B-)

11.The King's Man (B)

10.The Hunger Games: Mockingjay-Part 1 (B)

9.The Hunger Games: Mockingjay-Part 2 (B)

8.Lucky Number Slevin (B)

7.Conclave (B)

6.The Terminal (B)

5.The Hunger Games (B)

4.Easy A (B)

3.Spotlight (B+)

2.Road to Perdition (B+)

1.The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (A)

Top Dog: The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)

While I've enjoyed every entry in The Hunger Games franchise, Catching Fire remains my pick for the best installment by a huge margin. The tension and urgency levels in this one are cranked up to a really impactful degree and it makes the entire 2.5 hour runtime fly by. Not to mention, it also happens to be Jennifer Lawrence's finest hour as Katniss Everdeen (that scene with Lenny Kravitz's Sinna right before she enters the arena is just devastating).   

Bottom Feeder: Jolt (2021)

As game as Kate Beckinsale is to return to her action star roots, Jolt remains a major dud. Indie comedy filmmaker Tanya Wexler (Buffaloed) completely flubs her transition to the genre film space with this boring, convoluted riff on Crank (Beckinsale plays a bouncer who uses an electroshock vest to try and deal with her intermittent rage disorder who gives into her violent impulses after a man she's recently gotten romantically involved with turns up murdered under mysterious circumstances) that features a slew of incomprehensible fight scenes along with some really terrible supporting performances from the likes of Tucci, David Bradley and Jai Courtney.   

Most Underrated: Road to Perdition (2002)

Despite a pretty decent domestic run at the box office ($104.5 mil, which made it the 24th highest grossing film of 2002), Road to Perdition has managed to get lost in the shuffle of gangster movies. Tom Hanks is terrific as a Chicago-based mob enforcer forced to go on the run with his son (Tyler Hoechlin) after his boss' (Paul Newman in his final role) wild card son (Daniel Craig) murders the rest of his family, the themes of perpetual violence and the role father/son relationships can have in continuing or breaking the cycle is explored with great care and the ending, while slightly corny, is moving nonetheless. One of Sam Mendes' finest works without a doubt. 

Most Overrated: Julie & Julia (2009)

There's nothing horribly wrong with Julie & Julia from a filmmaking perspective, I just never really got on board with its parallel intertwined narratives despite the solid performances from Meryl Streep as Julia Child and Amy Adams as Julie Powell-a call center employee who decides to start a blog where she cooks her way through every recipe in Child's iconic 1961 cookbook Mastering the Art of French Cooking and found it to the lack the humor and heart of the late Nora Ephron's finer works. 

Wednesday, October 30, 2024

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 9

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (7-0) Week 9 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

2.(2) Detroit Lions (6-1) Week 9 opponent: Green Bay Packers 

3.(6) Buffalo Bills (6-2) Week 9 opponent: Miami Dolphins

4.(5) Green Bay Packers (6-2) Week 9 opponent: Detroit Lions

5.(3) Baltimore Ravens (5-3) Week 9 opponent: Denver Broncos

6.(4) Minnesota Vikings (5-2) Week 9 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

7.(7) Houston Texans (6-2) Week 9 opponent: New York Jets

8.(8) Pittsburgh Steelers (6-2) Week 9 opponent: Bye

9.(9) Washington Commanders (5-2) Week 9 opponent: New York Giants

10.(10). Atlanta Falcons (5-3) Week 9 opponent: Dallas Cowboys

11.(13) Philadelphia Eagles (5-2) Week 9 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

12.(16) San Francisco 49ers (4-4) Week 9 opponent: Bye

13.(11) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-4) Week 9 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

14.(17) Los Angeles Chargers (4-3) Week 9 opponent: Cleveland Browns

15.(14) Chicago Bears (4-3) Week 9 opponent: Arizona Cardinals

16.(20) Arizona Cardinals (4-4) Week 9 opponent: Chicago Bears

17.(19) Denver Broncos (5-3) Week 9 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

18.(22) Los Angeles Rams (3-4) Week 9 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

19.(12) Seattle Seahawks (4-4) Week 9 opponent: Los Angeles Rams 

20.(15) Dallas Cowboys (3-4) Week 9 opponent: Atlanta Falcons

21.(21) Indianapolis Colts (4-4) Week 9 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

22.(18) Cincinnati Bengals (3-5) Week 9 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

23.(30) Cleveland Browns (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

24.(23) New York Jets (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Houston Texans

25.(24) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

26.(26) Miami Dolphins (2-5) Week 9 opponent: Buffalo Bills

27.(27) Las Vegas Raiders (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

28.(25) New York Giants (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Washington Commanders 

29.(28) New Orleans Saints (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Carolina Panthers

30.(32) New England Patriots (2-6) Week 9 opponent: Tennessee Titans 

31.(29) Tennessee Titans (1-6) Week 9 opponent: New England Patriots

32.(31) Carolina Panthers (1-7) Week 9 opponent: New Orleans Saints 

Tuesday, October 29, 2024

Week 8 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Jalen Hurts (Eagles)

Hurts was able to find the endzone on the ground (3 TD's-his 2nd straight multi-rushing score performance) and through the air (1) against the Bengals on Sunday afternoon, which considerably elevated his good but hardly eye-popping yardage total (273). Overall, this was probably the best Hurts has looked all season, and his owners will be crossing their fingers that this will be a springboard for a huge 2nd half for the Eagles signalcaller. 

Honorable Mentions: Kirk Cousins (Falcons), Brock Purdy (49ers), Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers)

LVP: C.J. Stroud (Texans)

A botched snap that resulted in a -10 YD rushing attempt, lost fumble and a single TD throw banished an otherwise pretty good bounceback performance from Stroud (25/37, 285 YDS) versus the Colts after his career-worst outing in Green Bay to the fantasy cellar. He has the reeling Jets on a short week in Week 9, but the just confirmed ACL tear for Stefon Diggs paired with the continued absence of Nico Collins could very well extend the reigning Offensive Rookie of the Year's fantasy misfire streak to 3.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Caleb Williams (Bears), Anthony Richardson (Colts), Joe Burrow (Bengals)

Running Back

MVP: James Cook (Bills)

Everything was easy for the Bills offense in Seattle in Week 8, but things looked particularly effortless for Cook as he scooped up 133 scrimmage YDS and ran for 2 scores on 20 touches (17 carries, 3 receptions) in another blowout victory for the runaway AFC East leaders. Cook has a meeting with the Dolphins squad he scored 3 TD's against earlier this season in Week 9.  

Honorable Mentions: Josh Jacobs (Packers), De'Von Achane (Dolphins), Rhamondre Stevenson (Patriots)

LVP: Nick Chubb (Browns)

Chubb's second game after returning from an ACL tear wasn't much better than the first as he turned his 16 carries against the Ravens elite run D into 52 YDS. It should be tough sledding for Chubb once again this week when the Chargers and their 11th ranked run defense head to Cleveland. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Kenneth Walker III (Seahawks), Zack Moss (Bengals), Austin Ekeler (Commanders)

Wide Receiver

MVP: CeeDee Lamb (Cowboys)

The explosion Lamb owners have been waiting all season for finally happened on Sunday night as the Cowboys star WR had no trouble getting open all game long versus the 49ers and ended up with a ridiculous 13/146/2 line in a game that the Cowboys made surprisingly competitive late after a dismal start. Lamb has another plus matchup with the Falcons below average secondary on deck.  

Honorable Mentions: Ladd McConkey (Chargers), Marvin Harrison Jr. (Cardinals), DeVonta Smith (Eagles)

LVP: Amari Cooper (Bills)

After a storybook start to his Bills career, Cooper immediately faded into the background in his 2nd game with the team. As somebody who watched the bulk of this game live, I can tell you that the play where he slipped on a route that led to Josh Allen throwing his 1st pick of the season was the only time I even noticed he was on the field. The box score reflects that as well as he caught just 1 pass for 3 YDS and was only targeted one other time the whole game. This was a particularly discouraging performance from Cooper as Keon Coleman and Khalil Shakir played lights out and Dalton Kincaid scored his first TD in a month against a Seahawks defense that looked lost in coverage damn near every time Allen dropped back to pass. Cooper will look to return to form against the Dolphins on Sunday.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Michael Pittman Jr. (Colts), D.J. Moore (Bears), Drake London (Falcons)

Tight End

MVP: Cade Otton (Buccaneers)

While some in the fantasy world were debating whether Jalen McMillian or Sterling Shepard was going to emerge as the Bucs top receiving option in the absence of Mike Evans and Chris Godwin, Otton wasted no time proving that they were ignoring the clear leader in the clubhouse all along. Baker Mayfield has loved throwing to Otton since he got to Tampa last season and their connection was on full display as the 3rd year TE caught 9-of-10 targets for 81 YDS and 2 TD's in another painful shootout loss to the Falcons. If for some reason Otton is available in your league and you need an upgrade at TE, make him a top wire target this week. His target share is going to be absurdly high the rest of the way even when Evans presumably comes back in Week 12 or 13 and his consistency level from around Week 10 of last season through now has been quietly impressive.   

Honorable Mentions: Kyle Pitts (Falcons), George Kittle (49ers), Travis Kelce (Chiefs)

LVP: Pat Freiermuth (Steelers)

A week after having his 2nd best game of the season, Freiermuth was back to TE purgatory with a quiet 2/19 performance against the Giants last night. Boom-or-bust has been the nature of Freiermuth since he came in the league and it's unlikely that Russell Wilson's insertion into the starting lineup is going to do anything to change that. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Cole Kmet (Bears), Jake Ferguson (Cowboys), Dalton Schultz (Texans)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Lions

This hasn't been said much during the Dan Campbell-era in Detroit, but the defense and special teams powered the Lions stellar performance this past week by securing a sack, 4 takeaways (2 INT's, 2 FUM REC's) and a punt return TD from Kalif Raymond in a 51-14 victory over the Titans. With noted gunslinger Jordan Love potentially being on the shelf after being forced out of last week's game with the Jaguars with a groin strain, they probably won't have much value for this week's pivotal divisional clash with the Packers.   

Honorable Mentions: Steelers, Chargers, Texans

LVP: Vikings 

Fully loaded for the first time in weeks with the return of both Puka Nacua and Cooper Kupp, the Rams offense ran through the Vikings stout defense for 4 straight quarters in a 30-20 loss for the Vikes. They were able to get a pick on Matthew Stafford, but that's where the highlights ended as their vaunted pass rush failed to get a single sack for the first time all season and they extended their single takeaway streak to 2 after getting multiple in each of their first 5 games. A date with the now Joe Flacco-led Colts awaits them in Week 9.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Jets, Ravens, Bears

Monday, October 28, 2024

Quick Movie Reviews: Woman of the Hour, Brothers, Conclave, Venom: The Last Dance

Woman of the Hour: Anna Kendrick becomes the latest actor to dazzle with their directorial debut with the excellent true crime thriller Woman of the Hour. Told primarily in a non-linear fashion, the film focuses on how the paths of struggling Los Angeles-based actor Sheryl Bradshaw (Kendrick), prolific serial killer/rapist Rodney Alcala (Daniel Zovatto) and a woman named Laura (Nicolette Robinson) converged at a taping of an episode of The Dating Game in 1978 where Alcala-who was one of the three bachelors-was selected to go on a date with Bradshaw. While the frequent timeline shifts and script could've been a bit tighter, Kendrick is a total pro at promptly flipping the mood from playful to terrifying, the performances-particularly from an alternately charming and bone-chilling Zovatto-are terrific and the film makes potent points about the rampant misogyny woman face as they go through the world and how that ties into threats of or sometimes, actual violence against them. Woman of the Hour is easily in the upper echelon of films I've seen this year, and I can't wait to see where Kendrick goes as a filmmaker from here.  

Grade: B+

Brothers: A large collection of gifted actors (Peter Dinklage, Josh Brolin, Glenn Close, Taylour Paige, Brendan Fraser, Marisa Tomei, the late M. Emmet Walsh) gathering together to star in a shitty R-rated comedy that's well beneath their talents? Welcome back to the early aughts everybody! Fraser and Tomei are the only ones who can come out of this wretched thing with their heads held highs as they're responsible for about 98% of the laughs (Brolin represents the other 2%, and those come in one scene with Tomei) that exist in this unrelentingly hacky but fortunately very brief crime comedy that makes last year's Strays look like the sophisticated laugh riot of the century. Its lifetime sentence to the bowels of the Prime Video library is more than deserved.         

Grade: D+

Conclave: While I wasn't overly impressed by anything about Conclave other than the cinematography from Stephane Fontaine-which features some of the most natural-looking lighting choices I've seen in a movie in quite some time, it kind of rules that a catty, trashy Papal election thriller has a real chance of winning Best Picture this year. Conclave is full of the kind of non-stop ludicrous plot developments you'd find in a John Grisham paperback, but since they're presented in this elegant package by an Oscar-winning director in Edward Berger (All Quiet on the Western Front) and a cast of proper thespians headed up by Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci and Sergio Castellitto, it's being viewed as a high-end, topical political thriller by many people who would typically be repulsed by the idea of consuming such low art. Just a really masterful Trojan Horse job by everyone involved. Now, let's get this same group to remake Saltburn so the film can magically go from polarizing to beloved among critics.            

Grade: B

Venom: The Last Dance: What makes Venom such a refreshing departure from every other modern superhero movie is its deep commitment to being zany and ridiculous. Even as trilogy ender The Last Dance flirts with setting up the Tom Hardy-less future of Sony's Spider-Man spin-off universe at times, it never loses sight of the shaggy, silly spirit that allowed it to find an engaged audience that the other SSMU entries mostly failed to. Hardy continues to have a total blast with the dual roles of Eddie Brock/Venom, the fugitive road trip plot gives way to some of the finest Venom hijinks of the franchise so far, and the film does the damn near impossible by making a big superhero CGI action clusterfuck finale a badass, heartfelt sendoff to its antihero/lovable doofus protagonist. The Last Dance comes awfully close to challenging Let There Be Carnage as my favorite Venom entry and it would be a slam dunk choice for the #1 slot if it didn't stumble out of the blocks a bit with its (necessary) set up of the Knull and Chiwetel Ejiofor/Juno Temple plotlines. It's a borderline miracle that something this uniquely silly got the opportunity to turn into a proper franchise and I can't thank Hardy and Kelly Marcel enough for making it happen.          

Grade: B 

Thursday, October 24, 2024

Chiwetel Ejiofor Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Chiwetel Ejiofor-whose latest project "Venom: The Last Dance" is in theaters now. 

Chiwetel Ejiofor's Filmography Ranked:

19.Love Actually (D-)

18.The Lion King (D+)

17.Salt (C-)

16.Secret in their Eyes (C)

15.Infinite (C)

14.Locked Down (C)

13.Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (B-)

12.Serenity (B-)

11.Triple 9 (B)

10.Talk to Me (B)

9.12 Years a Slave (B)

8.Four Brothers (B)

7.Doctor Strange (B+)

6.Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (B+)

5.Children of Men (B+)

4.Inside Man (B+)

3.The Martian (B+)

2.The Old Guard (A-)

1.American Gangster (A-)

Top Dog: American Gangster (2007)

Nobody can claim American Gangster doesn't borrow heavily from many acclaimed gangster sagas that came before it, but it is a still damn fine, wildly entertaining film. Denzel Washington brings a whole lot of charisma and menace to his turn as prolific Harlem drug kingpin Frank Lucas while Russell Crowe's Det. Richie Roberts serves as the perfect foil for him as a hard-headed but honest cop whose obsession with bringing down Lucas leads to him assembling a secret task force full of similar noble loose cannon outlier in the deeply corrupt NYPD. Killer supporting turns from the likes of the late Ruby Dee as Lucas' mother, Ejiofor as Lucas' brother and Josh Brolin as corrupt detective Reno Trupo and some of the most energetic direction of Ridley Scott's storied career are the cherries on top of this old school gritty crime drama sundae.       

Bottom Feeder: Love Actually (2003)

It'll be the holiday season before we know it, which means the annual flood of Love Actually appreciation posts on social media are imminent. This is lowkey one of my least favorite times of the entire year since without fail, the deep contempt that I harbor for this saccharine sack of shit movie comes racing back into my veins like it never fucking left. Richard Curtis is the most insufferable cornball working in the film industry today and Love Actually is his Mona Lisa of relentlessly manipulative schmaltzy bullshit. Shoutout to Bill Nighy for being the only thing in this movie that doesn't make me want to vomit.   

Most Underrated: The Old Guard (2020)

I've talked about the Netflix Blockbuster Machine's many failures on here a lot over the past few years, so it's only fair that I take this opportunity to prop up one of its rare success stories. The Old Guard makes the most out of its premise of centuries-old noble warriors (Charlize Theron, Marwan Kenzari, Luca Marinelli, Matthias Schoenaerts) with regenerative healing abilities who pay the bills through mercenary work that has their well-established dynamic tested when they unexpectedly cross paths with a young woman (Kiki Layne) who shares their affliction by exploring each character's complicated relationship with mortality and delivering a host of electrifying action sequences. There's a sequel currently set to release next year that will probably fail to build upon the original since the great Gina Prince-Bythewood passed on directing this outing, but alas, the greatness of The Old Guard will remain regardless of how the follow-up turns out.         

Most Overrated: Love Actually (2003)

To briefly reiterate the vitriol from above, Love Actually is a film that I despise more than all but like 25-30 movies I've ever seen and its status as a holiday classic ensures that I'll be reminded about its wretched existence once a year.    

Wednesday, October 23, 2024

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 8

 =Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (6-0) Week 8 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders

2.(2) Detroit Lions (5-1) Week 8 opponent: Tennessee Titans 

3.(4) Baltimore Ravens (5-2) Week 8 opponent: Cleveland Browns

4.(3) Minnesota Vikings (5-1) Week 8 opponent: Los Angeles Rams

5.(6) Green Bay Packers (5-2) Week 8 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

6.(7) Buffalo Bills (5-2) Week 8 opponent: Seattle Seahawks 

7.(5) Houston Texans (5-2) Week 8 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

8.(11) Pittsburgh Steelers (5-2) Week 8 opponent: New York Giants

9.(9) Washington Commanders (5-2) Week 8 opponent: Chicago Bears

10.(8) Atlanta Falcons (4-3) Week 8 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

11.(10) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-3) Week 8 opponent: Atlanta Falcons 

12.(17) Seattle Seahawks (4-3) Week 8 opponent: Buffalo Bills

13.(16) Philadelphia Eagles (4-2) Week 8 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

14.(14) Chicago Bears (4-2) Week 8 opponent: Washington Commanders 

15.(15) Dallas Cowboys (3-3) Week 8 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

16.(13) San Francisco 49ers (3-4) Week 8 opponent: Dallas Cowboys 

17.(12) Los Angeles Chargers (3-3) Week 8 opponent: New Orleans Saints

18.(19) Cincinnati Bengals (3-4) Week 8 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles

19.(20) Denver Broncos (4-3) Week 8 opponent: Carolina Panthers

20.(21) Arizona Cardinals (3-4) Week 8 opponent: Miami Dolphins

21.(18) Indianapolis Colts (4-3) Week 8 opponent: Houston Texans

22.(24) Los Angeles Rams (2-4) Week 8 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

23.(22) New York Jets (2-5) Week 8 opponent: New England Patriots

24.(29) Jacksonville Jaguars (2-5) Week 8 opponent: Green Bay Packers

25.(23) New York Giants (2-5) Week 8 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

26.(28) Miami Dolphins (2-4) Week 8 opponent: Arizona Cardinals 

27.(26) Las Vegas Raiders (2-5) Week 8 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

28.(25) New Orleans Saints (2-5) Week 8 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers

29.(27) Tennessee Titans (1-5) Week 8 opponent: Detroit Lions

30.(30) Cleveland Browns (1-6) Week 8 opponent: Baltimore Ravens

31.(31) Carolina Panthers (1-6) Week 8 opponent: Denver Broncos

32.(32) New England Patriots (1-6) Week 8 opponent: New York Jets

Tuesday, October 22, 2024

Week 7 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

 Quarterback

MVP: Lamar Jackson (Ravens)

Lost fumble aside, Jackson basically had a perfect night in Tampa on MNF. The reigning MVP shredded the Bucs secondary for 281 YDS and 5 TD's while picking up another 52 YDS with his legs in another big win for the Ravens. Jackson will face a much stiffer test against the Browns 11th ranked pass defense in Week 8.

Honorable Mentions: Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers), Jalen Hurts (Eagles), Kyler Murray (Cardinals)

LVP: C.J. Stroud (Texans)

It was a really rough day at the office for Stroud at Lambeau on Sunday as the frisky Packers defense held Stroud to a career-low 86 passing YDS and zero TD's. Things got so dire for him that he even tried running the ball, but that only netted him 19 YDS on 5 attempts. Stroud will look to redeem himself against the Colts this week, who he threw for 234 YDS and 2 TD's against in their previous matchup in Week 1. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Anthony Richardson (Colts), Kirk Cousins (Falcons), Patrick Mahomes (Chiefs)

Running Back

MVP: Jahmyr Gibbs (Lions)

With David Montgomery having an off day by his standards, it was Gibbs' time to shine. The Lions speedster needed just 19 touches (15 carries, 4 receptions) versus the stout Vikings defense to pick up 160 YDS and a pair of rushing TD's in this early Game of the Year candidate that saw Detroit irk out the win with a late field goal. Barring another fumble from Montgomery that nails him to bench for a prolonged stretch, Gibbs will likely return to his timeshare role in the Lions backfield for their Week 8 showdown with the lowly Titans.   

Honorable Mentions: Joe Mixon (Texans), Saquon Barkley (Eagles), Rachaad White (Bucanners)

LVP: Rhamondre Stevenson (Patriots)

The people banking on Stevenson to return with a bang after his 1-game absence were majorly let down as the Patriots effectively ignored the running game against the Jaguars. Stevenson ended up with just 9 touches (7 carries, 2 receptions) for 35 YDS in yet another lopsided loss for the spiraling Patriots. Stevenson has been a consistent fantasy dud since his 2-game eruption to start 2024 and he'll be a shaky start once again this week despite a plus matchup with the Jets below average run defense.    

Dishonorable Mentions: Alvin Kamara (Saints), Devin Singletary (Giants), Raheem Mostert (Dolphins)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Amon-Ra St. Brown (Lions)

Not only did St. Brown extended his TD streak to 4 games versus the Vikings, but he also cleared the century mark for the 1st time since Week 2 as he hauled in 8 grabs for 112 YDS. St. Brown has a surprisingly tough draw this week against a Titans secondary that has surrendered the 3rd fewest fantasy points to receivers so far this season. 

Honorable Mentions: George Pickens (Steelers), Brian Thomas Jr. (Jaguars), DK Metcalf (Seahawks)

LVP: DeVonta Smith (Eagles)

Smith was literally the only active fantasy-relevant player for the Eagles to not have a good game against the Giants and he really pulled his weight in the stink department catching 1-of-2 targets for -2 YDS. The Eagles WR2 hadn't had less than 64 YDS in the other 4 games he's played this season, so it would be a surprise if this clunker snowballed into a full blown negative trend. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Tyreek Hill (Dolphins), Jayden Reed (Packers), Zay Flowers (Ravens)

Tight End

MVP: David Njoku (Browns)

Somebody had to fill the gap left by Amari Cooper in the Browns passing game and Njoku was the one who stepped up. The longtime starting tight end was a safety valve for all 3 QB's that played for the Browns on Sunday against the Bengals, hauling in a season-high 10 receptions for 76 YDS and a garbage time TD. He flashed a good rapport with Jameis Winston on the last couple of drives, so it wouldn't be a shock if he becomes the Browns top receiver now that Winston is set to start moving forward. 

Honorable Mentions: Mark Andrews (Ravens), Brock Bowers (Raiders), Cade Otton (Buccaneers)

LVP: Sam LaPorta (Lions)

It was a very quiet day for LaPorta (1 REC, 25 YDS) as Amon-Ra St. Brown and Kalif Raymond emerged as the primary targets in the passing game versus the Vikings. This marked the 3rd time in the last 4 weeks that LaPorta has received 2 or less targets in the passing game. Despite his worrisome target share, he's still a must-start TE1 for the time being.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Travis Kelce (Chiefs), Dalton Schultz (Texans), Isaiah Likely (Ravens)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Broncos

Vance Joseph's group absolutely feasted on the injury-depleted Saints offense led by rookie Spencer Rattler in Sean Payton's first trip back to the Superdome after resigning as Saints head coach following the 2021 season, securing 6 sacks and 2 fumble recoveries (1 of which was returned for a TD) in a 33-10 victory. They are being blessed with another juicy matchup this week when the woefully inept Panthers make the trek out to Mile High.    

Honorable Mentions: Eagles, Bengals, Bills

LVP: Jets

The not-so-secret return of Russell Wilson caught the Jets off guard in a major way. Russ, George Pickens and the Steelers running backs dumped all over Jeff Ulbrich's vaunted group-scoring 37 points and allowing 409 total YDS of offense in yet another embarrassing loss for Aaron Rodgers' dream team. The good news for the Jets is that they're headed up to Foxboro this week to take on a Patriots team they registered 7 sacks against and surrendered just 3 points to 5 short weeks ago in East Rutherford.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Browns, Saints, Chargers 

Monday, October 21, 2024

Movie Review: Smile 2


Smile 2 isn't so much a fresh take on what audiences saw in the original film 2 short years ago as it is confirmation that writer/director Parker Finn and this franchise are the real fucking deal. There's a world where Finn gets complacent after the surprising breakout success of Smile-which marked his directorial debut and only makes the sequel to collect a check. Fortunately, we're not living in that one. In fact, Finn is downright giddy to return to the horrifying, bleak universe he authored, and he found the perfect vessel to do so by making a pop star (Naomi Scott) attempting to mount a comeback after spending a year away from the spotlight after enduring a personal tragedy the next person to be afflicted by the "Smile Curse". The story deals with the suffocating horror of a woman trying to get her life back on track while being in the public eye and not having any that cares about her wellbeing in her inner circle since their incomes are dictated by the success or failure of her career. Scott shines by tapping into the ignored humanity of a woman whose been under the brutally unforgiving pop culture microscope for most of her life, and Finn does an exceptional job of using the protagonist's celebrity status to create a string of viscerally nightmarish sequences that play with the specific horrors of having every detail of your life broadcast to the public. You can probably guess the final destination of this journey based on the brief synopsis above, but that doesn't make the disorienting, dread-fueled ride to get there any less compelling or the closing frames any less unsettling.    

When the book is written on studio horror films of the 2020's, Smile 2 should be prominently featured. Finn's visual eye and ability to marry jump scares with grotesque gory imagery and slow-burning dread that pours off the screen are so strong it's almost hard to believe that this is only his second feature. Whether he returns to the Smile universe or decides to embark on another challenge, I'll be eagerly awaiting what he cooks up next.                                  

Grade: B+

Wednesday, October 16, 2024

Anna Kendrick Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Anna Kendrick-whose latest project "Woman of the Hour" releases on Netflix on Friday. 

Anna Kendrick's Filmography Ranked:

21.The Voices (D)

20.What Expect to When You're Expect Everything (D+)

19.Table 19 (C)

18.Mr. Right (C)

17.Get a Job (C+)

16.Alice, Darling (B-)

15.Cake (B-)

14.Pitch Perfect 3 (B-)

13.The Accountant (B-)

12.Self Reliance (B) 

11.A Simple Favor (B)

10.Drinking Buddies (B)

9.Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (B)

8.Pitch Perfect (B)

7.The Hollars (B)

6.Up in the Air (B)

5.Life After Beth (B+)

4.Pitch Perfect 2 (B+)

3.Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (A-)

2.End of Watch (A)

1.50/50 (A)

Top Dog: 50/50 (2011)

50/50's ability to approach the subject matter of a man (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) and his loved ones (Seth Rogen, Anjelica Huston) dealing with his cancer diagnosis/treatment through a combination of raunchy humor and unfiltered heavy emotion without ever devolving into melodrama or developing an inconsistent tone is simply remarkable. I don't know how or why screenwriter Will Reiser has seemingly feel through the cracks of the Hollywood system after this, but hopefully he returns at some point because this script is the kind of gem that only a high-end talent could author.    

Bottom Feeder: The Voices (2015)

In the wake of Ryan Reynolds career arc over the past decade or so, it feels kind of wrong to shit on one of the most recent (and likely final) instances of him starring in something outside of his snarky action hero wheelhouse. Then I remember just how much The Voices got on my nerves and those feelings go away pretty quickly. As admirably twisted as the premise is (Reynolds plays a schizophrenic factory worker who finally gives into the murderous impulses that have long tormented him after accidently killing his coworker), the attempts at dark comedy are really poor and Reynolds can't quite pull off the genuinely nice guy/reluctant monster dynamic that the role required.       

Most Underrated: Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (2016)

Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates isn't just my pick for Kendrick's most underrated movie, it's my pick for the most underrated comedy of the entire 2010's. Everyone from the top of the call sheet down to the bottom is funny as hell (Adam DeVine, Zac Efron, Kendrick, Aubrey Plaza, Sam Richardson, Sugar Lyn Beard, Stephen Root, Alice Wetterlund, Mary Holland, Kumail Nanjiani) and their talent along with how well they mesh all together goes a long way in making this movie a consistently hilarious ride. 

Most Overrated: Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)

Don't get me wrong, there's a lot to like here between the zany video game-inspired action, Edgar Wright's signature flashy editing/visuals and huge collection of recognizable actors that were part of the ensemble cast (Kieran Culkin, Aubrey Plaza, Kendrick, Chris Evans, Brie Larson, basically everybody else in the film besides Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Jason Schwartzman) before their respective breakouts, it just never really dazzled me in the way that it clearly did so many others. Even a rewatch a few years back did nothing to move the needle for me and at this point, I doubt anything will. Oh well, at least the rest of Wright's movies aren't confounding to me at all!     

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 7

 =Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (5-0) Week 7 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

2.(2) Detroit Lions (4-1) Week 7 opponent: Minnesota Vikings

3.(3) Minnesota Vikings (5-0) Week 7 opponent: Detroit Lions

4.(4) Baltimore Ravens (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

5.(5) Houston Texans (5-1) Week 7 opponent: Green Bay Packers 

6.(7) Green Bay Packers (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Houston Texans 

7.(8) Buffalo Bills (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Tennessee Titans 

8.(9) Atlanta Falcons (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Seattle Seahawks 

9.(6) Washington Commanders (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Carolina Panthers

10.(10) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Baltimore Ravens 

11.(12) Pittsburgh Steelers (4-2) Week 7 opponent: New York Jets 

12.(14) Los Angeles Chargers (3-2) Week 7 opponent: Arizona Cardinals 

13.(15) San Francisco 49ers (3-3) Week 7 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

14.(17) Chicago Bears (4-2) Week 7 opponent: Bye

15.(11) Dallas Cowboys (3-3) Week 7 opponent: Bye

16.(16) Philadelphia Eagles (3-2) Week 7 opponent: New York Giants

17.(13) Seattle Seahawks (3-3) Week 7 opponent: Atlanta Falcons 

18.(18) Indianapolis Colts (3-3) Week 7 opponent: Miami Dolphins

19.(25) Cincinnati Bengals (2-4) Week 7 opponent: Cleveland Browns

20.(21) Denver Broncos (3-3) Week 7 opponent: New Orleans Saints

21.(20) Arizona Cardinals (2-4) Week 7 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers 

22.(22) New York Jets (2-4) Week 7 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers 

23.(23) New York Giants (2-4) Week 7 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles 

24.(24) Los Angeles Rams (1-4) Week 7 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders 

25.(19) New Orleans Saints (2-4) Week 7 opponent: Denver Broncos

26.(26) Las Vegas Raiders (2-4) Week 7 opponent: Los Angeles Rams 

27.(27) Tennessee Titans (1-5) Week 7 opponent: Buffalo Bills

28.(28) Miami Dolphins (2-3) Week 7 opponent: Indianapolis Colts

29.(29) Jacksonville Jaguars (1-5) Week 7 opponent: New England Patriots 

30.(30) Cleveland Browns (1-5) Week 7 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

31.(31) Carolina Panthers (1-5) Week 7 opponent: Washington Commanders 

32.(32) New England Patriots (1-5) Week 7 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

Tuesday, October 15, 2024

Week 6 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Caleb Williams (Bears)

Williams put together the best game of his rookie campaign thus far in London on Sunday morning, shredding the Jaguars for 226 YDS and 4 TD's while adding 56 YDS on the ground in a statement win for the Bears. The reigning #1 overall pick has found his footing over the past few weeks after a brutal start to the year and should remain on the QB1 radar when the Bears return to action against the Commanders in Week 8.  

Honorable Mentions: Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers), Jordan Love (Packers), Jared Goff (Lions)

LVP: Dak Prescott (Cowboys)

The Cowboys Week 7 bye couldn't be coming at a better time. Prescott was among the worst Cowboys on the field on Sunday in their hilariously lopsided loss to the Lions, throwing for 178 scoreless YDS and 2 picks. After a shaky 8 TD/6 INT start to 2024, Prescott should be left out of starting lineups until he gets his shit together.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Kyler Murray (Cardinals), Kirk Cousins (Falcons), Geno Smith (Seahawks) 

Running Back

MVP: Joe Mixon (Texans)

Mixon's return to action after a 3-game absence with an ankle ailment was a mighty eventful one. Despite playing on a pitch count, he managed to rip off 132 scrimmage YDS and 2 TD's on only 15 touches (13 carries, 2 receptions) against the Patriots. He'll be an RB1 for their Week 8 tilt with the Packers.   

Honorable Mentions: Derrick Henry (Ravens), Bijan Robinson (Falcons), David Montgomery (Lions)

LVP: James Conner (Cardinals)

Negative game script and riding the pine for a bit after a fumble in the 2nd quarter led to Conner having a pretty ugly afternoon against the Packers, registering 46 YDS on 11 touches (7 carries, 4 receptions). Conner also managed to ding up his ankle late, so his practice availability will be monitoring ahead of their Week 7 showdown with the Chargers.     

Dishonorable Mentions: Javonte Williams (Broncos), Saquon Barkley (Eagles), Antonio Gibson (Patriots)

Wide Receiver 

MVP: Chris Godwin (Buccaneers)

On a day where the Bucs running backs were the main stars of the show, Godwin managed to seize some of the spotlight for himself. The veteran wideout secured 11 catches for 125 YDS and 2 TD's (all season highs) in a wild road win over the Saints. Godwin is being blessed with another plus matchup against the Ravens this week.   

Honorable Mentions: Garrett Wilson (Jets), A.J. Brown (Eagles), Terry McLaurin (Commanders)

LVP: D.J. Moore (Bears)

Moore's day almost went differently as he got tackled just shy of the goal line on a screen pass in the 3rd quarter, but alas, he was left with a boring 4 REC/20 YD statline on a day where the Bears dominated the Jaguars. This was the only 2nd game all season that Moore had less than 5 receptions and 6 targets, so this quit showing will probably serve as an outlier.     

Dishonorable Mentions: Brian Thomas Jr. (Jaguars), Brandon Aiyuk (49ers), Calvin Ridley (Titans) 

Tight End

MVP: Cole Kmet (Bears)

Kmet was the surprise top star of the Bears passing attack this past week, securing 5 catches for 70 YDS and 2 TD's versus the Jaguars. He's been a solid starting option for much of this year, and I have no reason to believe that will change as long as he's out there.    

Honorable Mentions: George Kittle (49ers), Mark Andrews (Ravens), Trey McBride (Cardinals)

LVP: Jake Ferguson (Cowboys)

After a couple decent games in a row, Ferguson reverted back to the kind of duds he was posting to start the year-making just 3 catches for 11 YDS in the Cowboys horrendous loss to the Lions. Ferguson will remain on the TE1/TE2 borderline when the Cowboys take the field against the 49ers in Week 8.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Tucker Kraft (Packers), Pat Friermuth (Steelers), Isaiah Likely (Ravens)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Steelers

Outside of surrendering a TD on the opening drive, the Steelers were dialed in against the lowly Raiders on Sunday, accumulating a sack, INT, 2 fumble recoveries and a blocked punt in a 32-13 win. They have a date with the Jets in Week 6.    

Honorable Mentions: Texans, Eagles, Bears

LVP: Jets 

Robert Saleh had to be having a nice big laugh at home after this performance versus the Bills. The vaunted Jets defense was far from great last night versus, picking up 2 sacks and 0 takeaways in a 23-20 loss where they allowed several huge gains and had zero answer for rookie Ray Davis-who was making a spot start for the injured James Cook-on the ground. They'll be looking for redemption against the Russell Wilson-led Steelers this week.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Cowboys, Broncos, Ravens

Monday, October 14, 2024

Movie Review: Saturday Night


Saturday Night depicts what transpired from 90 minutes before airtime through the opening sketch of the debut episode of Saturday Night Live on October 11th, 1975, in real time. Equipment malfunctioned. Crew members walked off during the dress rehearsal. Cast members were questioning what the hell they had signed up for.  Sketches were constantly being rewritten and cut from air. Celebrity guests were waiting around to see if they would get the opportunity to perform on air. Copious amounts of cocaine, marijuana and cigarettes were consumed by many parties involved in the making of the episode of live television. Basically, it was a borderline miracle the show even made it to the air to that night.

What Jason Reitman does in Saturday Night is use the behind-the-scenes look at the debut episode of Saturday Night Live to celebrate the enduring power of artists coming together to make things against all odds. Sure, he deeply respects and loves the legendary pop culture brand/comedic talent incubator that Saturday Night Live has become, but he knows that it wouldn't have gotten the opportunity to become those things if a band of talented, yet woefully inexperienced creatives hadn't stood strong in the face of adversity 50 years ago. A real time dramatization of the events of that night was the ideal storytelling tool to help Reitman convey this point as it highlights just quickly massive problems can arise on a production of this scale and how the best solutions to them often require a delicate combination of on-the-fly fixes and pervasive finger-crossing that those fixes hold up for long enough to complete the job. Making movies or television is a pressure cooker that only sickos who love to make shit with other like-minded people would sign up for and if it all works out, you get filled with a tremendous amount of pride for what you accomplished. And if it doesn't? Well, there's always next time.

The real time narrative device also ensures that Saturday Night is fun as hell to watch. There's an electric energy stemming from the revolving door of chaos that is playing out on screen, and it makes the movie feel alive in a way that it likely wouldn't have if it had taken a more conventional structural approach to telling this story. Telling such an inherently manic story bred an environment where everybody just gleefully leaned into the madness. Damn near everyone in this massive ensemble cast is fired up to goof around with a large group of fellow actors (the top standouts for me were Cory Michael Smith as Chevy Chase, Dylan O'Brien as Dan Akroyd and Lamorne Morris as Garrett Morris), the playful camerawork paired with the tight editing ensures that the viewer is fully aware of every move this speeding bullet train is making throughout and Jon Batiste's-who also stars as the episode's musical guest Billy Preston-brilliant score goes from sparse piano pieces to explosive horn-driven jazz at the drop of a hat. Despite all of the stress that goes into making it, vigor, vibrancy and playfulness are the heart of many great creative endeavors and Saturday Night has all of those things in spades. This is Reitman's finest hour as a director in quite some time and may the love and admiration he poured into this project carry over to whatever he does next.              

Grade: B+

Friday, October 11, 2024

Dylan O'Brien Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand out assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Dylan O'Brien-whose latest projects "Saturday Night" and "Caddo Lake" are now playing in theaters and streaming on Max respectively.  

Dylan O'Brien's Filmography Ranked:

12.American Assassin (D+)

11.Caddo Lake (D+)

10.Infinite (C)

9.Maze Runner: The Death Cure (C+)

8.Deepwater Horizon (C+)

7.The Internship (B-)

6.Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials (B)

5.The Maze Runner (B)

4.The Outfit (B)

3.Not Okay (B)

2.Love and Monsters (B+)

1.Bumblebee (B+)

Top Dog: Bumblebee (2018)

Bumblebee has a secret sauce that the other Transformers movies just don't have: A legitimately good human story! The entire film hinges on the relationship between the titular mute yellow-and-black robot and high school senior Charlie Watson (Hailee Steinfeld) and how their bond helps them cope with the pain of their pasts. A buddy movie narrative is a really unexpected angle to approach a Transformers movie from and the whole thing works so beautifully because the writing from Christina Hodson along with Steinfeld's performance is so heartfelt. The action, comedic and 80's nostalgia bits are good too, but the earnest emotion underneath all of the VFX is what makes Bumblebee a special movie.  

Bottom Feeder: American Assassin (2017)

While I never made a worst action movies of the 2010's list, American Assassin would've absolutely landed on it if I had. This lumbering dud of a spy revenge thriller features a level of clunky pacing, incoherent quick cut editing and flat action direction that is downright shocking for a mid-budget mainstream genre vehicle backed by a legit studio in Lionsgate.   

Most Underrated: Love and Monsters (2020)

One of the many films robbed of the chance of achieving cultural relevancy on account of the pandemic, Love and Monsters is a really charming, creative adventure romance that makes great use of O'Brien's inherent magnetism and contains some of the most unique, best looking VFX monsters in recent cinema history.   

Most Overrated: Deepwater Horizon (2016)

As technically impressive as it is as a disaster movie, Deepwater Horizon is too emotionally stagnant to properly depict the horrors of this tragedy that was brought on by the greed of BP.   

Thursday, October 10, 2024

Way Too Early Oscar Predictions: 2024 Edition

Fall festival season has all but officially concluded as the New York Film Festival enters its final stretch tonight with the US premiere of Steve McQueen's Apple-backed WWII biopic Blitz. This of course means it's time to embark on a silly little annual tradition in these parts: Trying to guess who and what will be nominated for Oscars at a juncture of the calendar where it's neither necessary nor wise to do so! Making this exercise even more reckless this year is the current lack of clear frontrunners in damn near every category, which is an exceptionally rare thing to see roughly a month after the big 3 fests (Venice, Telluride, Toronto) have concluded. This lack of early favorites across the board won't do anything to disrupt this piece. In fact, it only makes this whole goofy exercise more fun.       

As always given how far out we are from the start of the voting process, it needs to be noted that there are several major titles including Gladiator II, WickedA Complete Unknown, Nosferatu, Here and Juror #2 that have yet to publicly screen in their final form and the races have the potential to be widely impacted once they debut. Now with that note out of the way, here are my way too early Oscar predictions for every category excluding Best Original Song, Best Animated Short, Best Documentary Short and Best Live Action Short. 

*Indicates the predicted winner   

Best Picture:

Anora*

Blitz

The Brutalist

Conclave 

Dune: Part Two

Emilia Perez

Gladiator II  

Nickel Boys

A Real Pain

Sing Sing 

Best Director:

Jacques Audiard, Emilia Perez 

Sean Baker, Anora

Brady Corbet, The Brutalist  

Steve McQueen, Blitz

Denis Villeneuve, Dune: Part Two 

Best Actor:

Adrien Brody, The Brutalist 

Daniel Craig, Queer 

Colman Domingo, Sing Sing

Ralph Fiennes, Conclave* 

Paul Mescal, Gladiator II  

Best Actress:

Karla Sofia Gascon, Emilia Perez 

Angelina Jolie, Maria 

Nicole Kidman, Babygirl 

Mikey Madison, Anora* 

Saoirse Ronan, The Outrun 

Best Supporting Actor:

Kieran Culkin, A Real Pain* 

Clarence Maclin, Sing Sing 

Guy Pearce, The Brutalist

Stanley Tucci, Conclave

Denzel Washington, Gladiator II 

Best Supporting Actress:

Danielle Deadwyler, The Piano Lesson  

Selena Gomez, Emilia Perez 

Felicity Jones, The Brutalist  

Zoe Saldana, Emilia Perez

Aunjanue Ellis-Taylor, Nickel Boys 

Best Original Screenplay:

Anora*

Blitz

The Brutalist

A Real Pain

The Seed of the Sacred Fig

Best Adapted Screenplay:

Conclave*

Emilia Perez 

Nickel Boys

The Room Next Door

Sing Sing

Best Animated Feature:

Flow

Inside Out 2

Memoir of a Snail

Wallace and Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl

The Wild Robot*

Best Documentary Feature:

Black Box Diaries 

Daughters

The Remarkable Life of Ibelin

Sugarcane* 

Will & Harper

Best International Feature:

Emilia Perez*

The Girl with the Needle

Grand Tour

I'm Still Here

The Seed of the Sacred Fig 

Best Cinematography:

Lol Crawley, The Brutalist*

Greig Fraser, Dune: Part Two

Jomo Fray, Nickel Boys  

Paul Guilhaume, Emilia Perez 

Edward Lachman, Maria 

Best Film Editing:

Sean Baker, Anora

Nick Emerson, Conclave 

David Jancso, The Brutalist

Peter Sciberras, Blitz

Joe Walker, Dune: Part Two*

Best Costume Design:

Blitz

Dune: Part Two

Gladiator II

Maria

Wicked*

Best Makeup and Hairstyling:

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Dune: Part Two*

Nosferatu

The Substance

Wicked

Best Production Design:

Blitz

The Brutalist

Dune: Part Two

Gladiator II*

Wicked

Best Score:

The Brutalist 

Conclave*

Emilia Perez 

Saturday Night

The Wild Robot

Best Sound:

Blitz

Dune: Part Two*

Emilia Perez

Gladiator II 

Twisters 

Best Visual Effects:

Dune: Part Two*

Gladiator II

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Mufasa: The Lion King 

Twisters 

Wednesday, October 9, 2024

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 6

()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (5-0) Week 6 opponent: Bye 

2.(2) Detroit Lions (3-1) Week 6 opponent: Dallas Cowboys 

3.(3) Minnesota Vikings (5-0) Week 6 opponent: Bye 

4.(4) Baltimore Ravens (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Washington Commanders 

5.(8) Houston Texans (4-1) Week 6 opponent: New England Patriots 

6.(9) Washington Commanders (4-1) Week 6 opponent: Baltimore Ravens 

7.(10) Green Bay Packers (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Arizona Cardinals 

8.(5) Buffalo Bills (3-2) Week 6 opponent: New York Jets 

9.(15) Atlanta Falcons (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Carolina Panthers 

10.(7) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-2) Week 6 opponent; New Orleans Saints 

11.(18) Dallas Cowboys (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Detroit Lions

12.(6) Pittsburgh Steelers (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders 

13.(11) Seattle Seahawks (3-2) Week 6 opponent: San Francisco 49ers

14.(14) Los Angeles Chargers (2-2) Week 6 opponent: Denver Broncos

15.(12) San Francisco 49ers (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Seattle Seahawks

16.(16) Philadelphia Eagles (2-2) Week 6 opponent: Cleveland Browns  

17.(20) Chicago Bears (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

18.(17) Indianapolis Colts (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Tennessee Titans 

19.(13) New Orleans Saints (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

20.(22) Arizona Cardinals (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Green Bay Packers 

21.(24) Denver Broncos (3-2) Week 6 opponent: Los Angeles Chargers 

22.(19) New York Jets (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Buffalo Bills 

23.(27) New York Giants (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals 

24.(21) Los Angeles Rams (1-4) Week 6 opponent: Bye 

25.(26) Cincinnati Bengals (1-4) Week 6 opponent: New York Giants 

26.(23) Las Vegas Raiders (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers

27.(28) Tennessee Titans (1-3) Week 6 opponent: Indianapolis Colts 

28.(30) Miami Dolphins (2-3) Week 6 opponent: Bye 

29.(32) Jacksonville Jaguars (1-4) Week 6 opponent: Chicago Bears 

30.(25) Cleveland Browns (1-4) Week 6 opponent: Philadelphia Eagles 

31.(29) Carolina Panthers (1-4) Week 6 opponent: Atlanta Falcons  

32.(31) New England Patriots (1-4) Week 6 opponent: Houston Texans  

Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Week 5 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

Quarterback

MVP: Kirk Cousins (Falcons) 

Cousins' first great performance as a Falcon coming on a short week in primetime is something that no one would've ever predicted. Outside of a late pick that probably should've but ultimately didn't cost them the game, Cousins carved through the Bucs defense with ease-throwing for 509 YDS and 4 TD's in an early contender for Game of the Year. Only rostered in about 50-60% of leagues at the moment, Cousins will be a priority waiver target where available ahead of his Week 6 date with a horrid Panthers defense.   

Honorable Mentions: Joe Burrow (Bengals), Lamar Jackson (Ravens), Kyler Murray (Cardinals)

LVP: Sam Darnold (Vikings)

Anybody that bought in on Darnold extracting his long-awaited revenge on the Jets organization was left mighty disappointed on Sunday morning. Darnold put together his 1st stinker as a Viking, throwing for 179 scoreless YDS and an INT while also losing a fumble against the Jets elite defense. He'll face the Lions when the Vikings return to action in Week 7.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Josh Allen (Bills), Patrick Mahomes (Chiefs), Brock Purdy (49ers)

Running Back

MVP: D'Andre Swift (Bears)

What a difference 2 weeks makes! Swift put together another strong performance as the clear leader of the Bears backfield versus the Panthers, handling 21 carries for 73 YDS and a score while adding a pair of catches for 47 YDS. He should remain in starting lineups for the Bears Week 6 trek over to London to face the hometown Jaguars. 

Honorable Mentions: Rico Dowdle (Cowboys), Kareem Hunt (Chiefs), Rhamondre Stevenson (Patriots)

LVP: Breece Hall (Jets)

So much for Hall turning things around in Week 5.... Hall was once again completely stifled by a good defense, registering just 37 scrimmage YDS on 12 touches (9 carries, 3 receptions) versus the Vikings. As bad as his yardage totals have been, his touch counts are even more concerning as the Jets aren't really committing to the run and have basically put Hall into a timeshare with rookie Braelon Allen-who's arguably looked better than him over the past few weeks. Hall will be a risky start in Week 6 against the Bills.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Jerome Ford (Browns), Zack Moss (Bengals), Bucky Irving (Buccaneers)

Wide Receiver

MVP: Ja'Marr Chase (Bengals)

A season-best performance from Joe Burrow led to a season-best performance from Chase on Sunday. The Bengals star wideout was getting open and running after the catch at will against the Ravens suddenly porous secondary, turning 10 catches into 193 YDS and 2 TD's. Chase has officially returned to form after a very slow start and should be locked in as the elite WR1 option he was drafted to be moving forward. 

Honorable Mentions: Drake London (Falcons), Tee Higgins (Bengals), D.J. Moore (Bears)

LVP: Chris Olave (Saints)

Despite being in a pass-driven game script for most of the game last night, Olave was really quiet against the Chiefs-catching 2-of-4 targets for just 10 YDS. The Saints most versatile receiving threat has been off to a very erratic start to 2024 and with the team losing 3 straight games after a 2-0 start, Klint Kubiak should really start drawing up more plays for him. Olave will be a WR2 for the Saints Week 6 matchup with the Bucs.     

Dishonorable Mentions: George Pickens (Steelers), Diontae Johnson (Panthers), Deebo Samuel (49ers)

Tight End

MVP: Tucker Kraft (Packers)

Don't look now but the Packers might have another quietly lethal receiving option on their roster. Kraft followed up his breakout Week 4 performance with an even brighter gem (4 REC/88 YDS/2 TD's) in Week 5 versus the Rams. While his usage rate could suffer once Christian Watson and Romeo Doubs return to action, he's a no brainer starting option in the interim.  

Honorable Mentions: Brock Bowers (Raiders), George Kittle (49ers), Isaiah Likely (Ravens)

LVP: Dalton Kincaid (Bills)

Khalil Shakir's absence presented Kincaid with an excellent opportunity to step up and be the featured option in the Bills passing attack. He didn't take advantage of it. To be fair, Josh Allen only completed 9 passes on a day where he was pressured relentlessly by the Texans ferocious pass rush, but that still doesn't let Kincaid off the hook for not really showing up (he had 2 catches for 34 YDS) when his team needed him most. The second-year tight end has been one of the biggest disappointments of 2024 thus far and it's hard to envision him putting together a breakout performance against the Jets stubborn pass defense this week.       

Dishonorable Mentions: Hunter Henry (Patriots), Zach Ertz (Commanders), Mike Gesicki (Bengals)

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: Vikings

Brian Flores had Aaron Rodgers wishing he had just moved to Peru to do peyote full time. The Vikings sacked the Jets aging burnout QB 3 times and forced him to throw a whopping 3 INT's including a pick 6 by edge rusher Andrew Van Ginkel in a 23-17 victory that brought the Skol gang to 5-0 on the year. Minnesota's D/ST has been elite to start the year, and they'll look to pick up where they left off against the Lions top-flight offense in Week 7.    

Honorable Mentions: Broncos, Bears, 49ers

LVP: Ravens

While they did just enough to put their offense in a position to mount a late comeback and eventually pull out a somewhat lucky OT victory over the Bengals, this was a terrible showing by a Ravens defense that looked like they were trending in the right direction after a strong performance versus the Bills in Week 4. They allowed a Bengals offense that had been stuck in neutral for weeks now to hang 36 points on them and only countered that with 3 sacks and a pick, which wasn't even enough to get back them back to 0 fantasy points. A scorching hot Commanders offense is not an ideal bounceback spot for Zach Orr's group this week.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Texans, Bills, Dolphins 

Monday, October 7, 2024

Movie Review: It's What's Inside


Psychological black comedy thriller It's What's Inside is something that has been on my radar since it debuted at Sundance back in January. The debut feature from writer/director/editor Greg Jardin is a super low budget, twist-happy ensemble piece about a pre-wedding reunion between college friends (Brittany O'Grady, James Morosini, Gavin Leatherwood, Nina Bloomgarden, Alycia Debnam-Carrey, Reina Hardesty, Devon Terrell) that goes awry when an unexpected guest (David W. Thompson) from their past arrives with a suitcase containing a party game that threatens to drastically alter their lives moving forward was among the small number of titles that brought down the house in Park City this year. All of those rowdy screenings eventually lead to It's What's Inside getting its worldwide distribution rights picked up by Netflix for $17 million-which ended up being the biggest acquisition deal of this year's festival. While I don't lament the producers for taking the money Netflix threw at them, the at-home viewing experience of It's What's Inside left something to be desired that could very well have been remedied by being released in the same theatrical venues where the streaming giant's team first saw the film. 

As I alluded to above, It's What's Inside is a movie that makes heavy use of mind games, misdirection and plot twists to tell its story. There's really no shortage of moments-particularly in the back half of the movie-that would generate gasps, cheers, applause or really any emotion of excitement, surprise or jubilation from a crowd. Without the energy of a crowd however, the entire affair has really nothing going for it outside of Jardin's confident, stylish direction and trippy visuals/editing/camerawork that vibrantly illustrates the disorienting sensory experience its characters are going through. The big bag of sleight-of-hand tricks that serves as the driver for the plot becomes more grating as the twists start to pile up, the satirical elements aren't at all funny or clever and while it was probably a deliberate creative choice, the characters are obnoxious, thinly written jabronis who are largely indistinguishable from one another and really not much fun to be around at all. Is it entirely possible that I still would've been left cold by It's What's Inside if I had seen in a theater? Absolutely, but this is a project that was designed to get pops from a large, engaged crowd and seeing it outside of that environment just quite simply removed most of whatever fun exists within this flashy wannabe mindfuck of a genre movie.                 
                  

Grade: C

Thursday, October 3, 2024

Todd Phillips Ranked

Welcome to "Ranked", a weekly series where I rank a franchise or filmography from worst to best and hand assorted related superlatives. This week, I'm profiling the work of Todd Phillips-whose latest project "Joker: Folie a Deux" releases in theaters today. 

Todd Phillips' Filmography Ranked:

10.Joker (D-)

9.School for Scoundrels (D+)

8.The Hangover: Part III (B-)

7.The Hangover: Part II (B-)

6.War Dogs (B)

5.Road Trip (B)

4.Starsky & Hutch (B)

3.Due Date (B+)

2.Old School (B+)

1.The Hangover (A)

Top Dog: The Hangover (2009)

While some of the jokes haven't aged well, The Hangover is still a comedy classic on the whole. The film is a masterclass in situational comedy as it repeatedly throws absurd, hilarious curveballs at the viewer as the three lovable idiot protagonists (Ed Helms, Bradley Cooper, Zach Galifianakis) try to find their friend (Justin Bartha) the day after his Vegas bachelor party got way out of hand and watching this trio riff through the unique turbulence they're enduring is a real treat.      

Bottom Feeder: Joker (2019)

There's an underlying desperation behind Joker that is honestly just pathetic. Phillips is desperate to be taken seriously as a director after a career full of studio comedies by making a film full of hollow provocations and half-assed social commentary. Joaquin Phoenix is desperate to turn a famous comic book villain into this devastating cautionary tale of a mentally ill man who finds solace in violence after decades of being laughed at and pushed aside by society. The script is desperate to convince the viewer it's something fresh when it's really just a slightly altered version of The King of Comedy. All of these shamelessly self-congratulatory efforts make Joker an infuriating nightmare of a movie that is among the most obnoxious pieces of garbage I've ever sat through.                 

Most Underrated: Due Date (2010)

Phillips' last purely comedic directorial effort also happens to be one of his best. Robert Downey Jr. and Zack Galinfinakis are an electric odd couple pairing and the road trip narrative allows Phillips to once again show off the situational comedy chops that are his greatest strength as a filmmaker.     

Most Overrated: Joker (2019) 

2019 was such an incredible year for movies. Parasite, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood..., Marriage Story, The Irishman, The Lighthouse, Midsommar, Uncut Gems. Jojo Rabbit, John Wick: Chapter 3-Parabellum, Booksmart, Knives Out, Us, Richard Jewell, Just Mercy, Klaus, Rocketman and Dolemite is My Name represent just a small portion of the terrific films that were released over those 12 months in the United States. That's what makes Joker picking up 11 Oscar nominations and 2 wins such a travesty. There was so much excellence to recognize and the Academy rallied around this fucking movie? I saw Uncut Gems in May when A24 re-released it in IMAX and one of the thoughts I had afterwards was just how much it sucked that Adam Sandler not only didn't win Best Actor over Phoenix but couldn't even muster a nomination! Fuck Joker forever.             

Wednesday, October 2, 2024

2024 NFL Power Rankings: Week 5

 ()=Previous Ranking

1.(1) Kansas City Chiefs (4-0) Week 5 opponent: New Orleans Saints

2.(3) Detroit Lions (3-1) Week 5 opponent: Bye 

3.(4) Minnesota Vikings (4-0) Week 5 opponent: New York Jets 

4.(10) Baltimore Ravens (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Cincinnati Bengals  

5.(2) Buffalo Bills (3-1) Week 5 opponent: Houston Texans

6.(5) Pittsburgh Steelers (3-1) Week 5 opponent: Dallas Cowboys 

7.(13) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-1) Week 5 opponent: Atlanta Falcons 

8.(9) Houston Texans (3-1) Week 5 opponent: Buffalo Bills

9.(17) Washington Commanders (3-1) Week 5 opponent: Cleveland Browns 

10.(6) Green Bay Packers (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Los Angeles Rams 

11.(11) Seattle Seahawks (3-1) Week 5 opponent: New York Giants 

12.(14) San Francisco 49ers (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Arizona Cardinals 

13.(7) New Orleans Saints (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Kansas City Chiefs 

14.(12) Los Angeles Chargers (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Bye 

15.(18) Atlanta Falcons (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Tampa Bay Buccaneers 

16.(8) Philadelphia Eagles (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Bye 

17.(22) Indianapolis Colts (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Jacksonville Jaguars 

18.(19) Dallas Cowboys (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Pittsburgh Steelers 

19.(16) New York Jets (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Minnesota Vikings 

20.(23) Chicago Bears (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Carolina Panthers 

21.(20) Los Angeles Rams (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Green Bay Packers

22.(15) Arizona Cardinals (1-3) Week 5 opponent: San Francisco 49ers 

23.(25) Las Vegas Raiders (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Denver Broncos 

24.(27) Denver Broncos (2-2) Week 5 opponent: Las Vegas Raiders 

25.(24) Cleveland Browns (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Washington Commanders 

26.(30) Cincinnati Bengals (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Baltimore Ravens 

27.(26) New York Giants (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Seattle Seahawks 

28.(32) Tennessee Titans (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Bye 

29.(29) Carolina Panthers (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Chicago Bears 

30.(21) Miami Dolphins (1-3) Week 5 opponent: New England Patriots 

31.(28) New England Patriots (1-3) Week 5 opponent: Miami Dolphins 

32.(31) Jacksonville Jaguars (0-4) Week 5 opponent: Indianapolis Colts 

Tuesday, October 1, 2024

Week 4 Fantasy Football Winners and Losers: 2024 Edition

 Quarterback

MVP: Jordan Love (Packers)

Love made some headlines when he showed up to the game wearing a Brett Favre jersey to honor the former Packers QB following the news that he had been diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. That tribute carried over to the field as Love put together a gunslinger performance (389 YDS, 4 TD's, 3 INT's, 1 2-PT CNV) for the ages as the Packers were down by 21 versus the Vikings at the half and needed his arm to try and mount a comeback-which actually came surprisingly close to happening. Love has a date with a burnable Rams secondary in Week 5.   

Honorable Mentions: Baker Mayfield (Buccaneers), Jared Goff (Lions), Jayden Daniels (Commanders)

LVP: Josh Allen (Bills)

The Ravens defense and at times, his own receivers had Josh Allen in HELL on Sunday night-which led to him having one of the quietest games of his entire career (180 YDS, 5 CAR, 21 Rushing YDS, lost fumble) in a lopsided primetime loss. Allen will look to redeem himself in a key game against the Texans next week.  

Dishonorable Mentions: Kyler Murray (Cardinals), Kirk Cousins (Falcons), Caleb Williams (Bears)

Running Back

MVP: Derrick Henry (Ravens)

For the 2nd straight week, Henry was simply unstoppable. He absolutely obliterated the Bills pretty good defense to the tune of 199 YDS and a TD on 24 carries and notched another score in the passing game-which marked his first TD catch since 2019. The King has fully acclimated to the Ravens offense after a pretty quiet start, which should scare the shit out of the rest of the league.   

Honorable Mentions: Kenneth Walker III (Seahawks), D'Andre Swift (Bears), Jordan Mason (49ers)

LVP: Breece Hall (Jets)

When they needed him most in a low scoring, grind it out game with the Broncos, Hall failed the Jets. The 3rd year back was basically invisible, managing a pathetic 4 YDS on 10 carries and catching just 2 passes for 14 YDS in a crushing 1-point home loss to a team that's by all accounts inferior to them. This was the 1st time this season that Hall has had less than 80 scrimmage YDS and failed to reach the endzone, so his owners have nothing to worry about for now.    

Dishonorable Mentions: De'Von Achane (Dolphins), James Cook (Bills), Devin Singletary (Giants)

Wide Receiver 

MVP: Nico Collins (Texans)

The absence of Joe Mixon and Tank Dell put more on the plate of Collins this week and he did much more than just pick up the slack. The Texans WR1 caught 12 of the 15 passes that came his away for 151 YDS and a TD in a tight divisional contest with the Jaguars. Collins has already proved that his 2023 breakout campaign was no fluke and if he maintains his current level of play, he should be in the running for overall WR1 honors come January.    

Honorable Mentions: Jayden Reed (Packers), Jordan Addison (Vikings), CeeDee Lamb (Cowboys)

LVP: Zay Flowers (Ravens)

Lamar Jackson threw for a season-low 156 YDS as the Ravens run game carried them to a dominant win over the Bills.  Flowers was among the top parties impacted by this development-getting targeted only twice and only hauling in one of them for 10 YDS. While Flowers has been really quiet outside of Week 2 versus the Raiders, he remains the top WR in Baltimore by a wide margin and should return to being a solid performer in due time. 

Dishonorable Mentions: Calvin Ridley (Titans), Rome Odunze (Bears), Keenan Allen (Bears)

Tight End

MVP: Pat Friermuth (Steelers)

Those who elected to stick with Friermuth after his consistent but unsexy start to the season were rewarded this week as he picked up 5 catches for 57 YDS and scored his 1st TD of the year in a narrow loss to the Colts. As long as the TE-friendly Justin Fields remains the starter in Pittsburgh, Friermuth will be worth starting every week.  

Honorable Mentions: George Kittle (49ers), Travis Kelce (Chiefs), Dallas Goedert (Eagles)

LVP: Kyle Pitts (Falcons)

Balance has been restored to the fantasy universe as we've just had our first Kyle Pitts donut of the season. The always infuriating and unpredictable Falcons tight end failed to haul in any of his 3 targets on a day where the offense contributed very little to their winning effort against the Saints. The next stop on the Pitts rollercoaster is a Thursday night date with the Bucs-who've allowed the 10th fewest fantasy points to TE's so far this season.    

Dishonorable Mentions: Mark Andrews (Ravens), Isaiah Likely (Ravens), Brock Bowers (Raiders) 

Defense/Special Teams

MVP: 49ers

The overhauled, injury-riddled 49ers defense has been pretty poor to start the year. That all changed on Sunday when the league's worst offense rolled into Santa Clara. The Patriots surrendered 6 sacks, coughed up a pair of fumbles and allowed Fred Warner to get one of the easiest pick 6's you'll ever seen in an NFL game in a commanding 30-13 win for the 49ers. Despite their current 2-game losing streak, stopping Kyler Murray and the Cardinals explosive offense should be a far more difficult assignment for this still very much embattled group.  

Honorable Mentions: Browns, Ravens, Vikings

LVP: Bills

As I've already mentioned multiple times in this piece, the Bills defense didn't look so hot against the Ravens on SNF. They surrendered 35 points, got just 1 sack and forced a meaningless late turnover on a Lamar Jackson run that helped bring their fantasy point total from -3 to -1. While far from an ideal matchup given the depth of their offensive talent and the vendetta that a certain WR on their roster holds against them, it would be pretty surprising if they struggled to this extent again against the Texans this week.   

Dishonorable Mentions: Dolphins, Steelers, Texans