The NBA regular season came to a close last night, which means its now time to look back at all the ridiculous miscues and general absurdity that occurred in the league over the past six months. Here are the 10 moments that didn't involve J.R. Smith throwing bowls of soup at members of the Cavs coaching stuff or the Phoenix Suns "trying" to play defense that made me laugh the hardest this season. Honorable Mentions: Nicolas Batum gives Josh Richardson an involuntary vasectomy
Domantas Sabonis displays his outside shooting proficiency
Damian Lillard takes garbage time too literally
Ersan Illyasova proves why he gets bought out every season
10.Dennis Smith Jr. and John Collins in "When Trying to Stunt at the Rising Stars Challenge Goes Wrong"
The Rising Stars Challenge on All-Star Weekend is a beautiful evening where the league's rookie and second-year players have the opportunity to embrace their inner Harlem Globetrotter for 48 minutes. Dennis Smith Jr. and John Collins had the misfortune of experiencing the downside of this showy exhibition game when their unsuccessful dunk attempts in the final seconds of the fourth quarter left them looking more like the aloof jabronis that make up the New York Nationals roster than the beloved showboats that solve mysteries with Scooby-Doo in their spare time.
9.Matthew Dellavedova's Ghost Alley-Op
Crikey that Casper sure is a slippery devil! Better luck getting on the same page as that smiling invisible bloke next time Delly! 8.Kentavious Caldwell-Pope auditions for a role in Failure to Launch 2
I can't imagine the sense of relief that overcame Lonzo Ball after KCP pulled off this unfathomable shit in a professional basketball game. It's kind of hard to criticize a guy for having an ugly jump shot when one of his teammates can't even get off an uncontested shot before his feet hit the ground. 7.Zhou Qi: The Inbound Master
Someone get a member of the Texans front office on the line because I think we found Deshaun Watson's new backup!
6.Isaiah Thomas' completely unsubtle point shaving
If you listen closely, you can hear the sound of a Brinks truck peeling away from the Thomas residence without making a delivery. My heart aches for you IT. 5.LeBron's heartwarming tribute to James Harden
Even when things aren't going well for the Cavs, you can always rely on LeBron James to stay engaged in the game. He busts his ass every trip down the floor and this display of stout defense exemplifies that unrivaled competitive drive to the fullest #MVP.
4.Kevin Love's condescending handoff to Isaiah Thomas
The pre-trade deadline Cavs were a hotbed for internal dysfunction and Kevin Love slowly handing the ball to Isaiah Thomas like he's a small child after pulling down a rebound was the glorious peak of this petty iceberg.
3.Fifty Shades of Officiating
Who knew that officiating could be this sensual? Adam Silver should demand that every referee puts this same level of red-hot passion into their blocking foul calls for the rest of time.
2.Shelvin Mack finally becomes a member of the Magic
It took until mid-March, but this inexplicably awful pass proved that Shelvin Mack made the right decision when he chose to sign with the Magic in free agency last summer.
1.Malik Beasley drops dead on the court
Name: Malik Beasley
Time of Death: 9:02 CST on March 21st, 2018 at the United Center in Chicago, Illinois
Cause of Death: Thinking about the memes that were going to be made at his expense after he tripped over an air monster at the end of a blowout win over the tanking Bulls.
RIP Malik. Your inability to chorale a routine pass without dramatically eating shit will be missed by your teammates, the Nuggets organization and NBA Twitter.
No comments:
Post a Comment