Movie Review: I Am Number Four (Film Number 2 In My Goal For 2011 Films)

Every year it has to happen. Some film has to take the dubious honor of being the first bad film of the year and I Am Number Four is the lucky film I get to bestow that upon this year. Prior to seeing this, A friend of mine jokingly said that this film caused him to break up with his girlfriend. After seeing I Am Number Four, I now see why he would say that.

I Am Number Four makes the big mistake of false advertising. The trailers made this look to be a sci-fi action flick. Instead I Am Number Four is basically a romantic film with sci-fi elements and a few action sequences. With the sparse amount of the action on display, it means this film is mainly based around the story. Too bad the storyline is not particularly strong. The whole film tries to develop this romantic/ coming of age storyline and it really backfires. On top of the script issues, the acting is pretty bad all around. Alex Pettyfer is one of the bland and boring actors in all of Hollywood. He basically just coasts through this movie with one expression and shirtless half the time in an attempt to sway the teen girl audience. Dianna Argon, of Glee fame, plays his love interest and is equally bad. There are a couple of redeeming action sequences and Timothy Olyphant is good as always (seeing him surrounded by all these horrible actors makes me realize how great he is.) I Am Number Four suffers from a weak love story plot, pretty bad acting, and cheesy (not in a fun way) villains. I can guarantee there will be much worse films than I Am Number Four this year, but for night now this is the worst I've seen this year.

2/5 Stars

Album Review: Hate Eternal-Phoenix Amongst The Ashes

I am going to be completely honest, I lost interest in Hate Eternal for a while. I saw them live two years ago with Hatebreed and they were one of the most disappointing live acts ever. Erik Rutan's vocals were really muddled and it looked like he didn't give two shits about the performance. This was a big factor in why I didn't check out Phoenix Amongst The Ashes right away, but after all the acclaim it had been receiving, I decided to give it a bid. I am really glad I did, Phoenix Amongst The Ashes restored my faith in Hate Eternal and instantly made me a fan again

What really struck about me Phoenix Amongst The Ashes from the start was how fucking heavy it was. "Rebirth" is a perfect intro. This album is essentially the rebirth of Hate Eternal as a death metal force and I could not think of a more perfect opening song title. The fury of the opener carries over to the savage trio of tracks "The Eternal Ruler", "Thorns Of Acacia" and "Haunting Abound". These tracks grab the listener with their extreme heaviness, fret-board melting guitar solos, and melodic tinges. You can tell that Hate Eternal wanted to just massacre the listener from the start and they did just that. The album does take a little bit of dip in quality with "The Art Of Redemption" and the title track. Rest assured, Hate Eternal more than makes up for it with the punishing final tracks (album closer "The Fire Of Resurrection" being the standout of the final bunch of tracks.) This albums ends just as strong as it begins and Rutan saves some of his best solos of the entire record for last.

Hate Eternal has returned to their mighty form with Phoenix Amongst The Ashes. It's a devastatingly heavy effort that provides 40 minutes of crushing death metal. Erik Rutan is still one of the best guitar players in extreme metal, his solos here are among his most impressive to date. I will say that I didn't enjoy Phoenix Amongst The Ashes nearly as much as a lot of people did, but I still thoroughly enjoyed it. Phoenix Amongst The Ashes rekindled my love for Hate Eternal and this is a must-listen for fans of death metal.

4/5 Stars
Standout Tracks
1.Thorns Of Acacia
2.Haunting Abound
3.The Fire Of Resurrection

Album Review: Arsonists Get All The Girls-Motherland

Arsonists Get All The Girls is one of the most unpredictable bands within in the entire metal scene. Their sound is completely off-the-walls and it's only getting crazier by the record. Motherland is easily their most spastic record to date, but it's also their most polished and absolute best.

Motherland is the most mature Arsonists Get All The Girls record to date. It's still has their spastic roots completely in tact (I would say it's even crazier), but it adds a lot of progressive, electronic and grindcore elements to their sound. This more complex song structure makes this record even more of a treat to listen to. Arsonists Get All The Girls shows the listener right off the bat the direction Motherland is going to take and how much they improved as a band. Album opener "Rise To Fall" opens with a fantastic keyboard hook and melodic riffing. My favorite moments of Motherland is when they throw in insane tempo-changes and surprises. The last two tracks "Will Someone Please Turn Down The Ocean?" and "Tempest" are the two most ambitious and best tracks Arsonists Get All The Girls have ever made. They make first-rate use of keyboards and melodic guitar solos on these tracks that completely stick with you. Another awesome surprise was the instrumental track "West Cliffs". It shows off a side of Arsonists Get All The Girls that hasn't really been seen before and it's a sick instrumental track that serves as a great interlude in the middle of the record.

Motherland is the finest work to date for Arsonists Get All The Girls. It's takes their trademark brand of chaos and evolves into a more complex animal. It really is amazing how much better this band has got since The Game Of Life. This current lineup that has been in place since their last record Portals is the absolute best line-up of musicians has ever had and I can only see them getting even better over time.  Motherland is a catchy, heavy, progressive, spastic, and great record from Arsonists Get All The Girls.

4/5 Stars
Standout Tracks
1.Tempest
2.Will Someone Please Turn Down The Ocean?
3.Dr.Teeth

Movie Review: Pirates Of The Carribbean: On Stranger Tides

The Pirates Of The Caribbean franchise was one of the staple film series of my early teenage years. The first installment in the franchise is still among my favorite films and the two preceding installments are pretty great as well (more so Dead Man's Chest than At World's End.) After a four-year break in the action, Pirates is back and On Stranger Tides is a worthy fourth installment.


This go-round, Jack Sparrow is in pursuit of the Fountain Of Youth. Jack finds out there is an impostor in London claiming to be him and attempting to recruit a crew. Jack soon finds out that the impostor is none other than his ex-lover Angelica (Penelope Cruz), who is also revealed to be the daughter of then notorious pirate Blackbeard (Ian McShane). Jack ends up being forced to join Blackbeard's crew, because he (reportedly) knows the location of the Fountain. But Blackbeard is not the only person in pursuit of the Fountain; a group of British soldiers, led by Jack's old nemesis Barbossa (Geffory Rush), not to mention the entire Spanish Armada, are trying to beat them to the fountain.

On Stranger Tides sticks to the typical Pirates formula, and it's still as fun as ever. The sense of adventure and high-octane action and thrills are still present. The action sequences are not quite on the excessively grand-scale as they were in At World's End, which I think ultimately was a good choice. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed At World's End, but it was overlong and went overboard on some of the action sequences. On Stranger Tides' action scenes are pretty great, especially the sequence where Jack escapes from the custody of the British early in the film

Johnny Depp is still great as Jack Sparrow. Jack is such a great character, and Depp's eccentric wit brings a sense of non-stop fun to the role. It was also great to see Geoffrey Rush back as Barbossa, who is another one of the best characters, and it was a joy to see that he was brought back as well. Ian McShane makes a nice addition as Blackbeard. He was a solid villain and the right choice for the role. On the other end of the spectrum, Penolope Cruz didn't really do much. She wasn't completely horrible, but it seemed like she could have done a lot more with the character. Even though she was one the main characters, her performance made her character seem completely meaningless and inconsequential.

On Stranger Tides is a solid adventure that should please fan of the previous Pirates films. It's very much in the same vein as the other Pirates films, and the sense of fun is still there even though it is on its fourth go-round. It's not as good as the first two, but I would say it's a definitely improvement on At World's End. On Stranger Tides doesn't soil the name of the franchise and I look forward to the next installment.

4/5 Stars

Movie Review: No Strings Attached (Film Number 1 In My Goal For 2011 Films)

Well the time has finally come for me to start my goal for 2011 films. For people that don't frequent my blog, my goal for 2011 films is to see just about everything that comes out. I will only be marking the films I did not want to see initially as being part of my goal for 2011 films. I hope this exploration process will broaden my views and further my skills as an aspiring critic. Lastly, these reviews will be not be full-length like my reviews of films I see in theaters, but they will also be longer than the quick reviews I tend to do for films I see on DVD.

No Strings Attached was a film that to me at least,  a film that's trailers screamed generic romantic comedy. Romantic comedies are not a genre that I tend to enjoy, so let's just say I was not particularly enthused to see this film. To my surprise, No Strings Attached was actually pretty enjoyable. It's not really a film the reinvents the wheel anything like that, but it does provide a nice,light piece of entertainment. What really shocked about No Strings Attached was how funny it was. I really wasn't expecting to laugh this much during this film. The cast actually does a pretty solid job. Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman have an undeniable chemistry. It was actually pretty cool seeing Natalie Portman do a film that is such a contrast to Black Swan. It really shows the range Portman has as an actress and I would like to see her in another comic role soon. The greatest strength of No Strings Attached though is the hilarious supporting cast. Kevin Kline especially steals the show as Ashton Kutchers' dad. Seeing Kevin Kline play the role of Kutcher's crazy, drug enthusiast, ex-actor dad was completely hysterical. It's such an off-type role for Kline and he nailed it. I will say No Strings Attached gets sickeningly sappy at the end, which brings it down a bit. Still, No Strings Attached is a surprisingly funny and enjoyable film. It doesn't quite reach the heights of last year's She's Out Of My League and Going The Distance , which I consider to be the two finest romantic comedies in recent memory, but No Strings Attached still does it's job admirably.

3.5/5 Stars

My 100 Favorite Films Of All-Time

This has been a list that I contemplated doing for quite some time. Finally, a few months ago, I sat down and actually made a list of my 100 favorite films of all-time. I put quite a bit of thought into this and it was a very,very hard list to make. I have seen thousands of movies and there are still plenty of notable films that are considered to be among the best ever made that I haven't seen. I am sure there will be some complaining, but that's cool. I value everyone's opinion and feedback. Without further ado, here is the list of my 100 favorite films of all time.

100. Layer Cake
99. Caddyshack
98. This is Spinal Tap
97. Sling Blade
96. Ocean's Eleven
95. Airplane!
94. Meet the Parents
93. Coach Carter
92. Me, Myself and Irene
91. Zack and Miri Make a Porno
90. The Fifth Element
89. The Rundown
88. Borat
87. Pirates Of The Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
86. Gran Torino
85. Dogma
84. 3:10 to Yuma
83. Starship Troopers
82. Toy Story 2
81. Step Brothers
80. Clerks
79. Braveheart
78. Remember the Titans
77. Rambo: First Blood
76. Team America: World Police
75. Batman Begins
74. X2: X-Men United
73. Inception
72. Grandma's Boy
71. Predator
70. Dawn of the Dead (2004)
69. The Lion King
68. Saving Private Ryan
67. Friday Night Lights
66. Hot Rod
65. True Romance
64. Clerks 2
63. V For Vendetta
62. Rocky
61. 300
60. Iron Man
59. Kick-Ass
58. Good Will Hunting
57. Lucky Number Slevin
56. Star Wars: Return of the Jedi
55. Shaun of the Dead
54. The Wrestler
53. Billy Madison
52. Raiders of the Lost Ark
51. Gone Baby Gone
50. Star Trek
49. Shane
48. The Hangover
47. No Country For Old Men
46. The Hurt Locker
45. Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle
44. Die Hard
43. The Usual Suspects
42. Transformers
41. Inglourious Basterds
40. Unforgiven
39. Happy Gilmore
38. South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut
37. Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels
36. Do the Right Thing
35. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
34. Toy Story
33. Spider-Man 2
32. The Green Mile
31. Trainspotting
30. Friday
29. Office Space
28. 28 Days Later
27. Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
26. Hustle and Flow
25. Space Jam
24. Half Baked
23. Donnie Darko
22. Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers
21. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
20. Knocked Up
19. Superbad
18. Goodfellas
17. Training Day
16. Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
15. Snatch
14. Memento
13. Terminator 2: Judgment Day
12. Gladiator
11. The Matrix
10. Kill Bill Vol. I
9. The Boondock Saints
8. The 40-Year-Old Virgin
7. American History X
6. The Departed
5. The Godfather
4. Reservoir Dogs
3. Fight Club
2. Sin City
1.Pulp Fiction

Album Review: Tyler, The Creator-Goblin

Tyler,The Creator has exploded on in the Internet in the past few months. His popularity really seemed to come out of nowhere. I follow rap pretty closely, so when I kept hearing about Tyler, The Creator, I needed to at least check him out. I'll admit at first, I was a bit skeptical considering the level of popularity he has reached in such a brief period of time. When something like this happens, it tends to me that are extremely generic and mainstream (cough cough Wiz Kahlifa.)  Thankfully, Tyler, The Creator is not in the least bit mainstream and Goblin shows signs that Tyler, The Creator is one of the most promising rappers around.

When Goblin is good, it's really good. Tracks like "Tron Cat" and "Nightmare" showcase his insane, sinister flow. This is when Goblin is at it's absolute best . His lyrics although graphic, are also extremely clever. There where many moments where I was left saying "Holy shit, that line was sick". For me, lyrics are a huge part of rap and Tyler, The Creator definitely does not disappoint in that aspect. Another one of the album standouts "She" was a really nice surprise. It made great use of something I normally hate in rap songs, a sung R&B chorus. I tend to find R&B choruses to be an overdone and horrible cliche, but for whatever reason it's effective on this track.

Goblin is not without it's flaws. First off, there is far too many filler tracks. About four or five tracks on here (especially "Fish", "Her" and "Transylvania") are completely dull and there really isn't anything interesting about them. The production is kind of an issue as well. At times, it's fine, but at others it's really sloppy. Not too many of the beats are really memorable and they kind of seem like they were thrown together in a rush as a kind of an afterthought. Lastly, there are times where this record is too over-the-top. The lyrics are just too much at a few points during the record.

Overall, I would definitely recommend Goblin to fans of rap. Tyler, The Creator is one of the most intense and talented rappers to emerge in a long time. This record is definitely not for the faint for the heart, the lyrics are so violent and brutal that it makes early Eminem look like Will Smith. I think he will only get better over time. He's young (he's only 20) and what he has already accomplished is stunning. Goblin shows the massive potential that Tyler, The Creator has and if even irons out the kinks on this record, we could be looking at the next hip-hop genius.

3.5/5 Stars
Standout Tracks
1.Tron Cat
2.She
3.Nightmare