If there was yet another case needed that the found-footage horror genre needs to die a horrible death
(Paranormal Activity is already enough of a reason by itself),
Apollo 18 provides more than enough evidence. This film is just flat-out repulsive. It is so fucking boring and ridiculous that I felt like sticking sharp objects in my eyes. Even at an incredibly short 86 minutes (the movie itself is only about 73 minutes, the end credit sequence is very long), it feels like it's over 3 hours in length. I found myself checking the time every couple of minutes and being incredibly disappointed at how little time had passed. Pretty much nothing happens and when something does happen, it's so dumb you can't help but laugh and shake your head at how any screenwriter could this was a good idea. When you find out "the reason we haven't been back to the moon" you can't help but laugh hysterically at how lame of a reveal it is (Spoiler Alert: It's rock aliens with spider legs. Yes, you read that correctly.) About the only thing that saves this film from the dreaded 0 star rating is the the way it's shot. The style was interesting and it captures the moon in an oddly pretty yet eerie way. Besides that, this an absolute pile of shit. It's not scary, It's not entertaining, It's just astonishingly stupid and dull. Please don't waste your time on this disaster of a film.
1/5 Stars
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